ICYM Ch 19

Episode 19

Alright, let’s try to recall.

Even though I knew squeezing my fuzzy memories would barely yield anything, like wringing a dry rag, I still tried my best to remember.

The male lead… Right. Come to think of it, there was something about golden hair like melted honey.

The overly grandiose descriptions typical of a male lead actually helped jog my memory quickly.

And when it described the male lead, didn’t it mention that he had a ton of friends, which was odd for someone who had just transferred?

I vaguely remember a scene where the female lead got jealous because of that. I tried to remember more, but that was it. The male lead’s social circle didn’t play a big role.

<Soft and Sweet Boarding School> was told from the female lead’s perspective, and it never really detailed who the male lead’s friends were. It usually just said something vague like he was always surrounded by a group of friends.

Maybe I would’ve known more if I’d read it more closely, but what good was regretting it now?

“Phew…”

I puffed out my lips, balanced a pen between my nose and upper lip, and spun the chair around.

Was Kendrick one of those many friends?

I was surprised to realize I was now only one connection away from knowing the protagonist personally.

But what surprised me more was that Kendrick and Owen seemed to get along well.

If they’re close, they should at least show it a little. Otherwise, it makes people misunderstand.

If I had known earlier, I wouldn’t have even felt that tiny bit of sympathy thinking he wasn’t a self-imposed loner.

And I probably wouldn’t be having all these thoughts right now.

Fanning my face with my hand, I recalled the scene I had just witnessed.

A group of kids who looked like they’d stepped straight out of a teen romance novel—enough to make you think maybe protagonists really did exist in real life.

They looked radiant, living out their youth to the fullest, playing hard and doing everything they wanted while still being present in school life.

It wasn’t that I was jealous of them hanging out together or going out to have fun.

It’s just that while I was struggling to keep up with even a single class, everyone else looked so relaxed, and it gave me this strange sense of deprivation.

Like I was the only one struggling so desperately.

How’s a guy who says he’s aiming for Oxford going to make it if he keeps goofing around like that?!

My misplaced frustration turned toward Kendrick. Sure, I couldn’t say it to his face, but in my thoughts, I was free to grumble at whoever I wanted.

“…Instead of thinking about this stuff, I should just study.”

Thankfully, the first test score I got back was the lowest.

If I had gotten 32 points and then 29 later, I would’ve been even more depressed.

“Ugh.”

Stretching out, I got up from my seat. I had eaten a light dinner, so I was feeling hungry again.

A glance at the wall clock showed it was only 8 PM.

I figured I’d head down to the vending machine on the first floor, grab a drink, eat a slice of bread with jam, and then stay for just about one more hour.

I should stop by the room on the way and grab my meds.

Even though I was a recessive Omega, sharing a room with an Alpha for so long was still burdensome.

The reason it had been relatively easy to accept being an Omega after transmigration was because I’d been taking suppressants regularly and keeping my condition similar to that of a Beta.

I knew it wasn’t good for my health, but I still wasn’t mentally ready to go through a heat cycle.

It’s just mild heat, not some intense one, and the meds aren’t even that strong. It should be fine.

Maybe I’d been thinking too lightly of it just because I’d never had any serious problems caused by my pheromones. I really shouldn’t have been that complacent.

I went down to the first floor, planning to grab a soda from the vending machine before heading to the kitchenette. That’s when I caught a glimpse of familiar ginger-colored hair through the office between the vending machine and the back door.

Isn’t that Sunbae?

What’s he doing in the office at this hour? If it really was Sunbae, I figured I’d at least say hi, so I walked over.

He was standing with his back to the door, stiff and unmoving, in front of the shelf where they kept random items and lost-and-found stuff.

“Senior?”

“…Ah!?”

Sunbae jumped and turned around in surprise.

Thunk.

He must’ve been so startled that he didn’t check his surroundings. He banged his knee against a chair as he turned.

“Ugh.”

Sunbae grabbed his knee with a grimace of pain. He looked like he was in real pain, and I ended up frowning too as I stepped closer.

“You okay?”

“Uh, yeah. I’m fine.”

“Sorry. I didn’t think I’d scare you that much. I actually tried to make some noise as I walked in.”

“No, it’s fine. I was just lost in thought and didn’t hear you.”

Sunbae let out an awkward laugh and straightened his awkwardly hunched posture.

“What were you thinking ab—huh?”

I was looking at his flustered face when my gaze dropped to what he was holding in his hand.

“Oh, this.”

“That’s…”

Sunbae, who had been looking at me, slowly lowered his gaze to his hand. A strange silence passed between us.

“…T-this is yours, right?”

“Yeah. I thought I lost it. Where’d you find it?”

“Picked it up off the floor.”

“Which floor?”

“Just… the hallway.”

“Really?”

“I was about to put it in the lost-and-found box, but it looked familiar for some reason, so I was thinking it over.”

“Was that why you didn’t notice me coming up behind you?”

“Yeah. I was actually thinking about you, and then you suddenly showed up right then.”

Sunbae scratched his head as if embarrassed to be caught off guard. His face had turned faintly red.

It was just a small thing, but the fact that he remembered it was mine warmed a corner of my heart.

As I thought, the only one who looked after me like this was Sunbae.

He placed the badge in my hand.

Looking down at the patchy white-and-brown badge that resembled Coco, I smiled faintly.

“So that’s what happened. Thanks, Senior.”

“No need to thank me.”

“It’s not expensive or anything, but it was something I was pretty fond of.”

“…Yeah?”

Sunbae’s expression shifted subtly. I wondered if he thought it was weird for a high schooler to get this happy over a little badge and gave a sheepish laugh.

“They don’t sell the same one anymore.”

“…I see. By the way, didn’t you come to see the dorm supervisor? He’s not in the office right now. He just stepped out. Didn’t you run into him?”  

“I just got here.”

“Ah, got it.”

“And I didn’t really need to see a dorm supervisor or anything. I just came to buy a drink, but then I saw your back and figured I’d say hi.”

Though I had unintentionally startled him.

At my follow-up, Sunbae’s expression finally relaxed.

“Really?”

“Yeah.”

“You remember when I said we should hang out sometime, right?”

“Ah, uh, yeah.”

“If there’s somewhere you want to go, just let me know. We’ll pick a day and go.”

“Are you not going home during the mid-term break?”

“Probably not this time. I haven’t finished writing my personal statement yet.”

Right, the deadline was coming up for the personal statements needed to receive university offers.

“Shouldn’t you postpone hanging out with me, then?”

“I can spare a day during the break.”

It didn’t sound like he had plenty of time, but more like he was saying he could make time because it was me.

…So it really isn’t just in my head, huh?

The look on Sunbae’s face confirmed it wasn’t a misunderstanding.

“I’m waiting for the dorm supervisor, so you go on ahead.”

I couldn’t help sneaking glances at Sunbae, wanting to talk a bit more, but he gave me a slightly troubled look, reading my expression.

Continuing this kind of conversation in the dorm supervisor’s office, where we had no idea when someone might walk in, wasn’t really appropriate, so I had no choice but to turn and head out feeling reluctant.

“I was planning to head out anyway.”

“Are you going to the library?”

“Yeah, I’m a bit hungry, so I was going to grab something to eat.”

“Alright, study hard.”

Sunbae ruffled my hair as if praising me. I didn’t particularly like people touching my head, but for some reason, I didn’t feel like brushing his hand away.

“Okay.”

Only after Sunbae let go did I leave the office, a little reluctantly.

As I stepped out, I saw the door to the stairwell swing open abruptly, and my gaze naturally shifted in that direction.

I caught a glimpse of Owen’s back as he hurriedly ran up the stairs. Why was he running off like that?

Was he in a rush to pee?

But wouldn’t it be easier to just use the restroom on the first floor?

Then it suddenly hit me.

…Oh, it’s number two.

That explained it. With so many people coming and going on the first floor, it would’ve felt uncomfortable. There are people who casually talk about going to the bathroom, and then there are those who get shy about it. Owen was clearly the latter.

I could already imagine him frantically waving his hands and denying it if I brought it up after going back to the room.

I chuckled quietly and walked toward the kitchenette. I had been feeling pretty down earlier, but now I realized I was actually in a good mood, enough to recognize that I felt a little excited.

As soon as I returned to the library, I reattached the badge to my bag. I made sure to fasten it tightly so it wouldn’t come loose again.

Where should I suggest we go for that outing with Sunbae?

I really needed to focus on studying, but my thoughts were already wandering elsewhere.

Even though he thinks I’m a Beta, does he like me so much that it doesn’t matter?

My thoughts kept spiraling one after another, deeper and deeper.

Smack.

It’s not too late. I can think about it later.

I slapped my cheeks with both hands and squinted hard, trying to force myself to focus on the words that just wouldn’t sink in.