IDSEGI Chapter 59

Chapter 59

Yoo Ihan’s first impression was incredibly striking. I think I might have even stared, dumbstruck, because I had never seen anyone so beautiful. Every time our eyes met, my chest fluttered and my heart skipped. I guess this is what they mean by love at first sight.

But his personality was… a little strange.

“Yeoul, please imprint with me!”

“…Are you drunk?”

“No. If you don’t believe me, we could kiss. Want to check?”

“If you’re sober, that’s even scarier…”

For an Esper, imprinting was a huge risk. Once imprinted, their match rate with any Guide other than the imprinted one would drop below 20%. Even long-time partners rarely imprinted for that reason.

Some people believed the rumor that imprinting could help an Esper’s ability grow, but it was nothing more than an urban legend, like claiming ghosts were real.

Surely he didn’t believe in that nonsense—and yet he was asking to imprint? With me, someone he hadn’t even known for a week?

At first, I thought he was either completely insane or making a really bad joke. But he was serious. After that, Ihan came to Zone 5 every chance he got just to see me.

“Yeoul, what are you doing this weekend? I’m on long leave, so I’m free—go on a date with me.”

“I’m on duty, so I have work.”

When I refused, he disappeared for a bit, then came back and said,

“Yeoul, the Center Director says you don’t have to work.”

“What? What do you mean…?”

Unbelievable as it sounded, it was true. The Director even promised, grinning, that I’d be exempt from all weekend shifts from now on.

“What did you say to the Director?”

“I told him I’d handle all weekend gate outbreaks myself.”

“Gates don’t open just because it’s the weekend! How are you going to manage that alone?”

And yet he really did handle them all by himself. Before other Espers could even step in, he’d already cleared them, meaning I had no one left to guide and could skip work. The ridiculous part was that he moved fast enough to still have time to go on dates with me afterward.

Then one day, Ihan started speaking informally to me, and no matter how many times I pointed it out, he didn’t stop. Having grown up in an orphanage that strictly enforced age hierarchy, I wasn’t fond of it.

“Yeoul, want to go on a date? What do you like?”

I shot him a sideways glance as he kept trying to talk to me.

…He is good-looking.

Even when I was about to get annoyed, one look at his face and the irritation melted away. His looks were poison in more ways than one.

At first, I was suspicious. Why would someone that beautiful like me? But Ihan didn’t even give me the time to dwell on doubts—he confessed his feelings every single day.

“Yeoul, I think I need to see an eye doctor. Something’s wrong with my eyes.”

“What? Where? What’s wrong?”

When I asked in worry, he cupped my cheeks with both hands, smiling like he might melt right there.

“I can’t see anything but you. I can’t look at anything else. What should I do?”

“…”

I learned, spending time with Ihan, that sometimes when you’re too stunned, words just don’t come out.

His constant visits became part of my daily life, and at some point, I found myself waiting for him to come.

The more I saw of him, the more I realized Ihan was kind and caring. Even on leave, he often stopped by Zone 1 out of concern for his colleagues—and still always came back to me.

One day, when his leave seemed unusually long, I asked his friend Yushin,

“How long was Yoo Ihan’s leave supposed to be?”

“Leave? He’s never taken a day off since his awakening.”

The answer caught me off guard. He’d told me he was free during his leave, which was why he kept coming to Zone 5.

“That guy’s crazy. I don’t even know if he sleeps. How else can he take out monsters in Zone 1 and then immediately head back to Zone 5?”

When I heard those words, I froze. I hadn’t known Ihan was going that far for me. I had thought he looked tired lately—was this the reason?

“Will you guide me?”

Normally, I would have refused, but that time I agreed. After hearing what he’d been doing, I couldn’t just leave him be. I took his hands and poured my guiding energy into him.

And then, a miracle happened.

“A 99.8% match rate?!”

The result of our compatibility test was unprecedented. Everyone was shocked, but no one more than me.

I’d expected a good match rate since our guiding efficiency was unusually high despite our grade difference, but I hadn’t imagined it would be this high.

“We’re dating now, right? Yes? This is fate! It means we’re meant to be together!”

After that, Ihan became even more persistent. I wanted to say yes, but I couldn’t abandon Geon-hyung.

If I followed Ihan to Zone 1, Geon-hyung would be left alone. I didn’t want to discard someone just because they no longer needed me, the way others had done to me.

Even with my repeated refusals, Ihan didn’t give up. At one point, I thought he was obsessed with me just because of our high match rate.

But before long, I learned he already had an A-class guide with a perfectly good match rate.

No matter how high the percentage, a C-class simply didn’t have as much energy as an A-class. I couldn’t compare.

And yet, even before the test, he had gone out of his way to pursue me relentlessly. Doubting his feelings now seemed absurd.

He was crazy about me—so much that I thought he really might be insane.

“Mm—w-wait—”

Ihan pressed me against the wall and kissed me. My legs nearly gave out from the kind of kiss that felt like I was being swallowed whole.

“Yeoul, I thought I’d die from missing you.”

He kissed me so hungrily that he was breathless.

We’d only been apart for two hours!

But his mouth was on mine, so I couldn’t say it. In hindsight, maybe that was his plan all along.

Ihan didn’t know how to play hard to get—he only knew how to pull closer. His straight-line affection eventually broke through the lines I’d drawn and entered my heart.

“Hh—, I-Ihan—”

“Ugh, Yeoul, you’re so tight. Ah, damn, I want to stay inside you forever.”

That’ll kill me!

I wanted to say that, but all that came out were moans. When he bit and teased my nipples, a shiver raced down my spine to my toes.

“Aah—hah…!”

The obscene size of him drove into me, filling me tight before pulling out, only to thrust back in. It was a sensation I’d never felt before.

At first, we’d used guiding as the excuse for being physical. But at some point, we didn’t need excuses anymore. We simply loved each other.

By then, it felt stranger not to be dating. Still, I kept putting it off because of Geon-hyung.

“Yeoul, want to watch a movie with me? I got tickets.”

“…What movie?”

Ihan’s eyes went wide, his voice trembling faintly.

“Y-you’re going on a date with me?”

“Well… sometimes… You don’t want to?”

Seeing his genuine surprise made me feel guilty. I hadn’t meant to only take his body.

If I thought about it, I was the one being overworked, but at the time I only felt sorry for him.

“No! No, no! I’m thrilled. Over the moon. Is this a dream? You really just agreed to go on a date with me, right?”

“Stop overreacting. So, what movie is it?”

“Oh—uh—it’s called ‘The Robbers.’”

“That’s not out yet. You have tickets?”

“…I have tickets for the premiere!”

I thought it was a lie, but soon after, he actually showed me the tickets.

What should I wear?

I didn’t care much about clothes, so I didn’t have many options—most were mid-range brands. In the end, I bought something new just for that day.

I felt silly being so excited, but the idea of going on our first real date was enough to make me happy.

But that day, we didn’t get to go. It was the day he lost three of his colleagues.

Holding him as he cried in my arms, I made a decision.

I’ll make you happy.

I couldn’t leave with him to Zone 1, but maybe it would be okay to be with him.

While I was debating, Seo Yeon-oh appeared. I was happy that Geon-hyung finally got an A-class guide, but I was also happy that I could follow Ihan to Zone 1.

Life there wasn’t without its troubles, but being with him was enough to make me happy.

But imprinting—I couldn’t do that.

What if one day he got tired of me?

I didn’t want to ruin his future. I wanted to be with him forever, but I didn’t want to mortgage his life.

Don’t be greedy. You’re happy enough now.

But when I found his will, my heart shattered.

All my assets go to Yeoul. Tell him to live well on my money. I hope he forgets me and meets someone else, becomes happy. And if he thinks of me once in a while, I’d be grateful.

Stupid Yoo Ihan. You went into every mission with this mindset?

I love you so much—how could you think of dying and leaving me behind?

So I imprinted with Ihan. I wanted to give him certainty—that I was his forever, and I wanted him for my whole life too.

But the cost of imprinting was brutal. Twice, Ihan lost his life because of me.

Saltwater rushed into my mouth and nose. Death tastes salty. As I sank beneath the sea, my vision dimmed.

I’m sorry for imprinting with you, Ihan.

I’m sorry for loving you.

Yoo Ihan died because he loved me, and I die because I love him.

We loved wrong. Who proves love with death?

Still, if it’s to save you, I’ll gladly be a fool.

Looking back, most of my life had been unhappy, but the short two years with him covered it all.

Enough that I could call it a happy life if someone asked.

My life was always winter, and you were that brief clearing in the afternoon sky during winter—just a few hours of sunlight that turned my whole season into spring.

Compared to your wealth, it’s not much, but I’ve saved a fair bit too. Use it to eat something good—not just scraps.

Forget me and live well with another guide. No, if you live too well, I might get jealous—so fight with them once in a while.

And sometimes… think of me.

I wonder for a moment where the far side of the deep sea might be. Even if my body breaks into foam and mixes with the waves, my heart will sink forever to the ocean floor. My love is too heavy to ever rise.

That’s okay. As long as you can breathe and live.

I sink. Down, down.

Darkness pulls me in. There will be no more sunlight in my days. The sea grows darker, but far away, a faint light flickers.

“Yeoul!”

You couldn’t possibly be here, yet I hear your voice.

“Yeoul, Yeoul!”

Someone draws closer to me. Even underwater, I can tell you’re crying. I shape my lips to call the name I’ll never forget.

“Yoo… Ihan…”

Only when you nod do I realize—it’s not a dream. You really jumped into the sea to save me.

From the darkness receding into the distance, I grasped the light.

My hero, cruel as ever, had come to save me once again.