0&1 Ch 11.3

“Is he unwell? Is he healthy? Is he happy in the palace? Does everyone care for Eddie?”

You were with the King just a moment ago. Didn’t he tell you that?

I could have made her cry. I could have made her feel so guilty that she couldn’t bear it. It would have been so easy. She looked so miserable even now.

“Edward is doing well. The castle is abundant with everything, so there’s no reason for him to be sick. Edward is healthy, and he’ll grow taller than me. There’s no need to worry, madam. The King said so himself.”

The King must have comforted her. Anyone would have done the same seeing her like this. She buried her face in her hands.

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have shown His Highness this side of me. You must think I’m a shameless woman.”
“No, you’re not.”

But she didn’t seem to hear me.

“Eddie won’t remember me. He’ll think I’m a heartless mother who abandoned him. I sent him to the castle and have lived a life of luxury, but I haven’t had a single day of peace. How much must he hate me…“.

”Edward is worried about you.“ 

I hadn’t done anything, but the lady began to blame herself endlessly. I tried to stop her as she dug her heels in, but I was powerless.

”Your Highness is so kind. You’re just like His Majesty.”

The lady forced a smile. She raised her head and muttered, “I mustn’t cry,” as she began to blink her eyes.

“He even went to see you once.”

She froze. “What?”

“Do you remember? On the day when four children visited your mansion, a boy wearing a shaggy black wig was talking to you. That boy was Edward.”

The woman’s eyes widened. She looked exactly like Edward. I had always thought Edward looked like the King, but he actually looked more like his mother.

“Edward came to see me?”
“Yes.”
“How…? No, why?”
“Is it strange for a child to want to see his mother?”

“That boy must not see me!” Her words burst out like a scream, sharp and hushed all at once. “Who else have you told this to? Does the Queen know? No….”

Why are you acting like this?”

The woman staggered. I quickly grabbed her arm.

“I promised. I promised that as long as I live, I would never see Ed again. In exchange for acknowledging Ed, I promised not to set foot in the castle where His Majesty resides and not to harbor any presumptuous desires…”

“To whom?”

Her terrified eyes met mine. I thought I knew the answer. Queen Milane.

“No one knows. Only Edward knows that he went to see you.”
“What about those children?”

“They’ll never say a word. They’re all Edward’s friends.” I reassured her. 

She clung to me and regained her strength. I suppressed a cough that threatened to escape. I couldn’t cough in front of her; I had told her that no one in the castle was sick.

“Eddie… Does he miss me?” The woman asked cautiously, as if afraid to hear the answer.

“Yes. He said he wanted to eat your apple pie.”

She covered her face again, then whispered an apology. “He remembered.” She composed herself, then took off a locket from around her neck and handed it to me.

“Can you give this to Eddie? Please. It’s such a relief that he has such a good brother…”

A good brother. My conscience pricked me, but I reached out my hand. Then I heard a voice. 

“Your Highness!”

Someone was calling me from afar.

“Where are you, Your Highness?” Dot was close to tears, loud enough to wake the entire lodge.

Lady Rosé grabbed my hand and pressed a locket into it. The metal pressed against my palm. A chain hung down to my wrist.

The moment I looked up, she turned around and ran away, pulling her robe over her head. Dot grabbed me.

Only then did I realize that my heart was pounding. I coughed violently. Dot clung to me.

“Wow, Your Highness! Are you okay? I thought I had lost you…”
“I was thirsty, so I came out for a moment.”
“You should have woken me up! How could you go out alone? No, it’s my fault for not noticing that you had woken up. I’m a failure as a servant!”

I grabbed his arm. “Did you see anyone?”

“What?”
“How did you know where I was?”

“I’m Your Highness’s attendant. Of course I’d know where you’d be!” Even while blaming himself, Dot spoke proudly.

Oh, I see. I calmed Dot down and returned to bed. My whole body ached. I felt like I would faint if I closed my eyes.

Dot brought water and I drank the whole glass in one go. I took the cup and drank it all in one gulp. I thought it would cool me down, but instead, my chest felt heavy and stuffy.

Lady Rosé, the Queen, the King, Edward. One by one, their faces came to mind. The locket in my pocket felt cold. Was I running a fever?

I fell asleep in that state.

I had a dream. 

Edward was looking down at me from atop his horse. I was lying on the ground.

Jealousy made my heart feel like it would burst. Edward’s blond hair, backlit by the sun, shimmered as if the ends were melting into the light.

Why do you look so much like Father? Why are you the only one who looks like him?

Edward glanced at me with eyes that looked just like the King’s, then walked away.

“Are you alright?” Grey held out his hand. His tone was polite, but his eyes looked down on me.

I hated Edward even more than Grey, who ignored me.

On my last day at the royal villa, the King took me hunting. I saw Sir Baumkuchen shoot a bird that flew up in surprise at the King’s arrow.

The King praised Sir Baumkuchen’s skill, but he couldn’t hide his expression. Sir Baumkuchen had no intention of appeasing the King’s discomfort, and the hunt ended in a tense atmosphere.

I felt like I was performing acrobatics on horseback. I had a fever and a headache. My body felt detached from reality.

I was sweating from the heat, yet I shivered from the cold. My center of gravity felt like it was being pulled downward, as if something heavy were tied to my ankles.

The King’s knights occasionally glanced back at the sound of my coughing. The King never did.

I was being ignored. Joffrey was being ignored. Even if I stood on my head in the saddle, the King wouldn’t look at me.

I was being ignored. Joffrey was being ignored. Even if I stood on my head on the horse, the King would not look back.

Sir Baumkuchen slowed down and came closer to me. He looked at the King as he followed my gaze.

“Was the hunt as enjoyable as you expected, sir?” My throat made a metallic sound. Sir Baumkuchen adjusted his horse’s speed to match mine.

“Reality rarely lives up to expectations. Well… I’m sorry.”
“Have you done something wrong?”

Sir Baumkuchen just shrugged his shoulders.

We didn’t say another word, and the hunt was over.

On the way back to the castle, Sir Baumkuchen climbed into my carriage. He seemed tired of pretending to be a great knight outside.

Dot didn’t welcome him, but the stories he brought with him were enough to capture his interest. Sir Baumkuchen talked about what had happened at the hunting ground without Dot.

“That’s terrible! The Prince tried so hard! The Prince was in pain, but he acted so calmly. How could His Majesty be so heartless?” Dot was genuinely indignant.

I felt a little awkward whenever this happened. Why is he so loyal? What did Joffrey do for him?

It’s difficult for people to remain consistent, but Dot was always loyal. Of course, that’s to be expected from a servant character.

“He’s such a wonderful Prince! Yes, he’s a little soft-hearted and sometimes disappears on his own, causing my heart to skip a beat!”

“That’s right.” Sir Baumkuchen chimed in. Dot was sincere, but I felt like the knight was teasing me.

He was just as consistent as Dot. Then again, they say people only change when they die. It was strange to see Sir Baumkuchen trying so hard to impress His Majesty and apologizing for talking nonsense.

“Why are you doing this, Your Majesty?” Dot became depressed. Sir Baumkuchen’s response had a negative effect.

You made him like that, so fix it. I signaled with my eyes. Sir Baumkuchen suddenly remembered something urgent and got out of the carriage. It was ridiculous.

“I don’t think His Majesty should do that. He really shouldn’t. The Prince is so…” Dot fell silent. I couldn’t understand why he was so upset.

“I don’t care.” I said sincerely.

Whether the King ignores Joffrey or not, Joffrey will grow up fine. I saw how well Joffrey was doing at the academy. Even if he doesn’t have any friends now, he’ll be popular by then and might even fall for the female lead. Though that shouldn’t happen.

“You need to rest, Your Highness.”

Dot laid me down on the seat and took out a thermometer. He seemed to think I was too sick to be sad.

I opened my mouth. The thermometer entered between my lips. My fever had gone down. The headache was from something else.

Did the King enjoy secret trysts every time he went hunting? Had he been seeing her all along? Was he cheating on the Queen? Since when?

I thought it was a family like a soap opera, but an ongoing affair? It really was like a soap opera.

If he was coming to see her anyway, he could have brought Edward with him.

I reached into my clothes. I could feel the hard shell of the locket. Just getting this made the trip to the hunting ground worthwhile. In a game, it would be like a hidden quest item.

When I opened the locket, there was a portrait of Lady Rosé and the King. Both were golden-haired beauties, smiling with affection. They looked like a perfect couple. 

This definitely can’t be seen by the Queen.

I wanted to see Edward. I wanted to get rid of this quickly and clear my head. Edward would like it. Or maybe not.