Chapter 53

It felt like time had stopped for a moment.

Haon looked shocked at Cha Yugeon’s confession.

The gazes that tangled in the air were solely focused on each other.

At that brief moment, only Cha Yugeon was visible in his field of vision. It wasn’t unpleasant, but rather unfamiliar and unbelievable. Haon had no words to say and hesitated for a moment.

“I think I like you, Park Haon.”

Cha Yugeon confessed once again. Only then did Haon’s cheeks turn red a beat too late.

Confession, yes, it was a confession. Cha Yugeon confessed to him. As this fact sank in, Haon’s heart raced loudly. He felt like he should say something, but he couldn’t think of anything to say.

His lips just twitched.

“It’s crazy, I know, but I do like you.”

Cha Yugeon chuckled self-deprecatingly. Countless thoughts crossed his mind. Why, since when, how did this happen, and was it really true?

What should I do now?

 Amidst this inner turmoil, Haon opened his mouth.

“How can you know?”

 “Huh?”

 “That you like me… How do you know?”

Among the many questions, Haon was surprised to find himself asking this one. It was an unconscious question. Later, Haon would blame himself for asking such a question, but he couldn’t take back what he had said.

“I didn’t know, either. It’s the first time I’ve felt this way about someone, so I’ve been thinking a lot about what this feeling is. I keep worrying, feeling nervous, trying to find excuses to meet you for the smallest reasons, pretending to be busy or have something to do just so that I didn’t look too desperate. I couldn’t figure out why I felt this way, no matter how much I thought about it.”

Cha Yugeon slowly gave his answer to Haon’s question. Haon looked at him with a surprised expression. He didn’t understand why he had asked such a question, but Cha Yugeon was doing his best to answer it.

Moreover, among the things he was saying, there were some that resonated with Haon’s feelings.

He was worried for Cha Yugeon. It had been that way for some time. He worried and was anxious about him.

Even during the battle with the Kraken, when Cha Yugeon insisted on going alone, Haon couldn’t bear it and ended up guiding Baek Chan-kyung to help him. It wasn’t for Baek Chan-kyung’s sake, it was solely for Cha Yugeon’s sake.

‘Is this what it means to like someone?’

Of course, he couldn’t judge based on this alone. Haon denied the rushing thoughts within him.

“To be honest, I thought I was just infatuated with you yesterday. I blamed the alcohol I didn’t even drink, I blamed the atmosphere. But I was just fascinated with you, Park Haon.”

Haon’s cheeks flushed at Cha Yugeon’s words. He never expected Cha Yugeon to say he was fascinated with him.

“Then, when I thought you were going to die, I got scared. It was the first time I was so scared in my whole alive, excluding my awakening.”

“You were scared that I was going to die…?”

“Yeah, it was irrational fear. It felt like my whole world was crumbling down.”

Haon was quite shocked by his answer. It wasn’t just because of Cha Yugeon’s answer, but also because he had felt a similar feeling for the same reason.

When they were in VR training, Haon was scared when Cha Yugeon was in danger. While he couldn’t say his feelings were exactly the same as Cha Yugeon’s, they were similar in a broad sense.

At that time, seeing the blood flowing from Cha Yugeon sickly pallor made Haon felt like something inside him was breaking. He didn’t know exactly what it was.

“So I knew. I think I like you.”

“… “

“And after saying I like you, I’m even more certain. It’s not just that I think I like you, I do like you.”

Some emotions can’t be understood unless they are expressed. Not only the other person but also oneself may not know. That’s why there are emotions that need to be expressed. For Cha Yugeon, it seemed that ‘liking someone’ was one of those emotions. After saying he liked him, he gained confidence in his feelings.

Seeing Cha Yugeon like this, Haon had the thought, ‘maybe.’ Sharing similar emotions now, perhaps he also liked him.

But Haon didn’t want to accept it. He was afraid of change. Acknowledging that he liked Cha Yugeon would change a lot of things. He was afraid of what exactly would change and how much. Therefore, he kept denying the persistent thoughts while swallowing dry saliva.

“So, I don’t want last night to be everything.”

Cha Yugeon continued seriously. Haon looked at him with surprised eyes.

“I don’t want it to be just a one-night thing.”

“Then… what do you want…?”

In fact, Haon felt anxious as he asked this question. He felt that whatever answer he received, something would change in his relationship with Cha Yugeon.

“Oh, no, never mind. It’s okay if you don’t answer…”

“Let’s date.”

Haon looked at Cha Yugeon with wide eyes. There was a hint of tension in Cha Yugeon’s expression, and Haon felt a surge of heat.

Afterl all the time they spent together, this was a moment when everything felt unfamiliar.

* * *

“Meow.”

“Oh, what’s up? Ah, are you hungry? Sorry, I’ll get you some food.”

Haon scooped up some food from the bag and filled the empty bowl. The sound of the food filling the bowl filled the silence dorm.

“Meow, meoow.”

Sang-deok happily meowed as he ate his food. Just seeing how happy he was eating made Haon feel a mix of envy and admiration. If only life could be so simple for him too.

“Ah, this is driving me crazy.”

Haon sat hunched over, messing up his hair in frustration. Cha Yugeon’s confession kept replaying in his mind.

It had been three days since Haon received the confession. During that time, he had felt powerless in front of the memories of that day.

Is this how it feels when someone confesses? Haon had no point of comparison since it was his first time receiving a confession. So he had to immerse himself in these new emotions.

“I think I like you.”

“So I don’t want to just have a one-night stand.”

“I don’t want that night to be everything”

“Let’s date.”

Haon couldn’t accept the proposal. The only thing he could say was sorry. That was the best response for him. Even if he turned back time, he would have given the same answer.

“Sorry.”

He couldn’t accept the suggestion to date. Haon wasn’t comfortable with the idea of dating Cha Yugeon. That’s why he refused, apologizing at the same time. After that, he couldn’t bring himself to look at Cha Yugeon’s face, so he lowered his head and went back to his room.

That should have been the end of it. Cha Yugeon confessed, and Haon rejected him. So he shouldn’t be caught up in it anymore. But Cha Yugeon’s confession kept coming back to him.

“When you receive a confession… is it supposed to feel like this, Sang-deok?”

“Meow.”

Haon asked Sang-deok, who didn’t seem to understand his words. After a short meow, Sang-deok rolled over and playfully pawed at Haon. Even in his troubled state, Haon couldn’t help but laugh at Sang-deok’s antics.

After laughing a few times, Haon absentmindedly scratched Sang-deok’s belly. Sang-deok didn’t mind the attention, even if he was from a cat monster. Thanks to him, Haon was able to momentarily forget his worries and enjoy Sang-deok’s cuteness.

“Now, how am I supposed to face Cha Yugeon?”

But he couldn’t escape reality forever. Haon muttered to himself, overwhelmed by the worries flooding his mind.

Thoughts of Cha Yugeon still lingered.

Since Haon had never confessed to anyone before, nor had he been rejected, he didn’t know what emotions Cha Yugeon might be feeling right now. But he could intuitively sense that he might feel lonely and difficult.

 …Somehow, Haon felt worried about Cha Yugeon.

Of course, he couldn’t imagine Cha Yugeon digging himself into depression or anything like that. But he seemed quite melancholic. In fact, he seemed to be quite down.

Actually, Haon wanted to contact Cha Yugeon. He was curious about what he was doing, how he was doing. He even worried if Cha Yugeon, who usually ate well, was eating properly. Perhaps he wasn’t eating properly due to the shock of rejection. Haon even felt like going to see Cha Yugeon who was next door right away.

“But… how can I do that?”

Because Haon was the one who rejected the confession, he couldn’t do that. Haon sighed deeply, feeling frustrated.

At that moment, the doorbell rang.