DGMYF 4
by soapa“It’s pretty.”
“Isn’t it? You can’t miss out on flower viewing in the spring.”
As Kaiso did not get angry, Troy became emboldened. He called over the servants who were watching nearby and began to plant the tree. Due to the shock, the petals rode the wind, came inside the window, and landed on Kaiso’s desk. At this rate, it seemed the desk would become a mess with flower petals. He briefly considered whether he should close the window, but decided to just leave it.
Feeling a sharp gaze from the side, he turned around to see Troy, who had already finished planting the tree, leaning against the window frame with his chin cupped in his hands. The thin curtain rustled as it brushed against his body.
‘Why is he looking at me with such eyes.’
Troy’s sparkling eyes were quite burdensome. Now that he thought about it, it was also a little suspicious. That fellow might have approached him with some kind of impure intention. If so, what could be his purpose? Money? Or his own life?
Kaiso suddenly lost interest. It was because he did not mind being deprived of either. It was a meaningless life whether he lived or died. If what he wanted was his life, he would rather he just took it quickly.
“Stop it and go about your business.”
“Can’t I just watch? I won’t be a bother.”
“What’s so interesting to watch?”
He was just sitting and reading a book. Moreover, the book was filled with nothing but exceedingly boring content.
“Your Grace’s face is the most interesting thing in the world.”
“What nonsense is this.”
“You’re really incredibly handsome.”
After finishing his words, Troy blushed and did not know what to do with himself. In contrast, Kaiso let out a short, bitter smile.
He also knew that his looks were not bad when he was young. He was not the type to admire himself alone in the mirror, but it was impossible not to know when receiving the constant courtship of alphas. The alphas in heat ─ of course betas and even omegas too ─ bothered him so much that he even came to resent being born with such looks.
However, that was all a story of the past, and the situation now was completely different. Kaiso’s eyes were hollow, and his lips were dry and chapped. His body was gaunt and unsightly, and above all, was he not a cripple? Kaiso thought that the word handsome no longer suited him.
Then why was that fellow saying such things? Kaiso frowned slightly. It seemed that he was making a ridiculous pass at him, knowing that he was an omega.
“You said you were a beta. Aren’t you an alpha?”
“I’m not! I don’t even have a pheromone scent. Try smelling me.”
Troy pulled the collar of his shirt to the side, revealing his bare skin. Kaiso gave a slight sniff, but aside from the smell of dry grass and a bit of sweat, he could not sense the unique pheromone scent of an alpha or an omega.
However, still unable to let go of his suspicion, Kaiso narrowed his eyes at him.
“Are you really a beta?”
“Probably. That is what Mr. Gordon thinks.”
“How tragic.”
Kaiso shook his head slightly. Of course, not all alphas were large, and likewise, not all omegas or betas were necessarily small. Even Kaiso himself, though an omega, was tall and had a considerable physique.
Just then, from a distance, the head maid Sasha called for Troy.
“Troy, stop playing around and come work quickly!”
“Yes, I will!”
Troy waved his hand toward Sasha.
“Can I come back later?”
“No, don’t come.”
“Yes, then I’ll see you later!”
What kind of guy is he. Kaiso shook his head from side to side and closed the window. Then, with the feeling of grabbing the book by the scruff of its neck and threatening it to tell him the reason for kidnapping his child at once, he read it line by line.
In the afternoon, Gordon asked him to have a meal, but Kaiso refused and remained cooped up in the study the entire time. He was once again searching through books related to dragons.
“A dragon’s artifact.”
Dragons, who lived for a very long time, each possessed a special treasure imbued with their magical power. Unlike other treasures where being shiny was everything, it had a special ability, so it was called a ‘dragon’s artifact.’
“There are still people who believe this nonsense.”
In truth, the artifact was a kind of trick to motivate knights to slay dragons. There was even a law stating that the hero who defeated a dragon could take all the treasure, so it was very suitable for planting false hope in rookie knights.
The book was deeply analyzing what kind of abilities each might have, under the premise that dragon artifacts of course existed. Looking at absurd words like ‘Hand of Gold,’ ‘Clock that Turns Back Time,’ and ‘Elixir of Immortality,’ Kaiso’s mind went completely blank. It was truly a waste of precious paper and ink. However, Kaiso read the book with concentration, thinking he might be able to use this as bait to recruit knights.
Just then, someone knocked on the study door.
“May I come in?”
It was Troy.
“Go ahead.”
His body was feeling stiff anyway, so it seemed okay to take a short break. Troy came in carefully, holding a huge plate.
“It’s about time you might be hungry. I brought some snacks.”
When he lifted the cloth covering the plate, a lemon pie with beautifully toasted white meringue appeared. A sweet scent wafted so invitingly that even Kaiso, who had no appetite, found his eyes drawn to it. Moreover, it was almost the size of a shield.
“…Did you make this?”
“Of course! I brought tea too, so please have it together.”
As he happened to want a cup of tea, Kaiso did not refuse and closed the book. Noticing the sign of affirmation, Troy carefully placed the plate on the desk. Then he stood beside him and began to prepare the tea.
Kaiso was about to tell him about his preferences for black tea, but Troy was already putting heated milk and three cubes of sugar into the teacup. It seemed he had finally received some training from Gordon.
When Troy came in, the study felt full. He was so tall that it seemed his hand could reach the very top shelf of the bookcase without any effort. Kaiso thought that he should take the opportunity to ask the fellow to get a book down for him.
“You’ve come at a good time.”
“Ah, I missed you too.”
Troy bent his waist to meet Kaiso’s eye level. As he abruptly pushed his face forward, Kaiso frowned and leaned his body back.
“…What nonsense is this. Just get me the book on the top shelf. Third from the end, gray cover with gold leaf decorations.”
“Aha, this one?”
As he had expected, Troy’s hand easily reached the top of the bookshelf without even using a stepladder.
“Yes, that one.”
Troy took out the book, wiped it with his clothes, and only then handed it to Kaiso. Then he looked at him with a face full of anticipation.
“Please try the pie. I’m sure it’s delicious.”
“I’ll eat it later, so you can leave now.”
“I’ll leave after I see you eat it.”
He was a more stubborn fellow than he looked. He could have flown into a rage and told him to get out at once, but Kaiso obediently picked up the fork. He put a small piece of pie into his mouth and moved his jaw as if chewing fodder. But the tangy taste that touched his tongue was not unpleasant. When he swallowed and took a sip of tea, a warm energy spread throughout his body. Kaiso raised his eyebrows.
“Not bad.”
“Really? Wow…. I’m so relieved. I really worked hard on it.”
Troy was overjoyed, hugging the empty tray tightly to his chest. A smile, the brightest in the world, spread across his face, and his body bounced as if it would fly up to the sky at any moment.
“I knew I would make the perfect pie today. The weather was nice since the morning, right? And as it happened, there were fresh lemons in the pantry. When I was whipping the meringue, it stuck to my hand so well, I just had a good feeling. I’m grateful to the chicken that gave me the fresh eggs, grateful to the sunlight that helped the lemons grow well, and grateful to the oven that baked it perfectly….”
Kaiso watched the scene of Troy chattering excitedly with the feeling of watching a theatrical performance. It was such a long-winded speech that anyone hearing it would think he had received a knighthood for a lemon pie. He had not even said it was delicious, nor had he given a compliment, so what could make him so happy. He thought that life must be quite easy for someone with a personality that laughs so well and is easily happy about small things.
“And finally, I will dedicate today’s glory to Your Grace.”
“I didn’t do anything.”
“You ate it deliciously. That’s the most important thing.”
A deflated laugh escaped from Kaiso’s mouth. He willingly took another bite of the pie and then set down his fork.
Thanks to his slightly improved mood, a fact he had momentarily forgotten came to mind. Come to think of it, that fellow was a visitor who had come because he had something to say.
“Didn’t you say you had something to tell me?”
In that moment, Troy’s face brightened radiantly. He nodded his head vigorously and answered yes. However, when it came to actually speaking, he seemed shy, clasping his hands together and fidgeting.
“Uh…. Um. What it is….”
“If you’re not going to talk, then leave.”
“Ah, wait a minute! Your Grace, don’t you remember me?”
Looking at Troy’s expectant gaze, Kaiso was lost in thought for a moment. He suddenly had a feeling that those bright blue eyes were familiar. But that was probably due to his doting-father nature, which made him think of Ingrid whenever he saw blue eyes.
Ingrid was the spitting image of Kaiso, from her jet-black hair to her pretty features, but only the color of her eyes was different. Unlike Kaiso, who had deep purple irises, Ingrid had clear and refreshing blue eyes like the summer sea.
Kaiso even scrunched up his face as he rummaged through his memories, but nothing about Troy came to mind.
“I don’t know.”
“I knew you wouldn’t remember, but I’m a little disappointed.”
Troy said as he placed another slice of pie on the plate that still had the half-eaten piece. For some reason, his voice was dejected.
“I remember everything.”
“What was it about?”
“Uhm, well.”
Troy showed clear signs of nervousness, fidgeting with his fingers and tapping his toes. Kaiso’s curiosity was piqued as well.
“Your Grace, you saved me. Ten years ago, in the Agares Valley.”
Ten years ago was when the large-scale monster war was taking place, and the Agares Valley was one of the monster infestation sites in the north. Kaiso could not quite remember if his 21-year-old self had ever gone to the Agares Valley. But it was common to fight in the chaos of war without knowing where was where.
“The Agares Valley, you say. Did I save you from monsters?”
“Yes, that’s right! My hometown is near that valley. Wow, just thinking about it now makes me tremble. Since that day, I have been waiting for the day I would meet my savior again.”
An overjoyed smile spread across Troy’s face. His shoulders rose up as if he could not contain the joy of meeting the person he had been eagerly waiting for for ten years. In contrast, Kaiso’s face remained expressionless. Once he heard the story, his interest dropped sharply.
Unlike Troy’s fuss, this was not a particularly special event. It was because Kaiso was a hero who had led the monster war to a perfect victory and saved hundreds, no, thousands of lives. The number of people whose lives he had directly or indirectly saved was countless, and he was not the first or second person to seek him out like this to express gratitude.
“But to really meet again like this! Maybe we are destined to be!”
“Destined, my foot.”
If one were to speak of destiny over such a trivial matter, Kaiso’s destined partners would number at least in the thousands. For Troy, it might have been a special, once-in-a-lifetime experience, but for Kaiso, it was not. Besides, a lot of time had passed since then. Even if it were truly destiny, it was enough time for its effect to have worn off and then some.
As if he had not expected such a blunt reaction, Troy was a little flustered. He tried a little harder to draw Kaiso’s interest.
“You know, I have never for a moment forgotten that day when you, Your Grace, appeared like a prince on a white horse. Your Grace is my savior and my hero!”
Troy even shouted with his face all red, but it only produced the opposite effect. Listening to his words, Kaiso suddenly became ashamed of his own state. The 21-year-old him that Troy remembered was from his most brilliant and radiant days.
Back then, his body was healthy, and his mind was healthy. He was so full of confidence that it bordered on arrogance. Wherever he went, he led people, and everyone liked and admired him. It was truly the era of Kaiso Windermere, to whom the title of hero was more fitting than anyone else.
But now was different from then. Kaiso squeezed his own gaunt thigh with his hand.
“You must be disappointed.”
“Pardon?”
“My current state…. Isn’t it too different from back then.”
A self-deprecating laugh escaped from Kaiso’s lips.
“Uhm, is that so?”
Troy tapped his cheek with a finger as if thinking deeply. Then he continued speaking with a bright smile.
“Ah! That’s right, you had your hair tied up back then. But your current look suits you really well too.”
The lobes of Troy’s ears turned red. He could not even make eye contact and could barely hold his gaze somewhere around Kaiso’s shoulder.
“Ah, of course, I like either way. But it’s just…. Uh, well…. Your long hair is like the night sky, so it’s very pretty.”
Hearing him speak in a flurry, Kaiso gathered his fallen hair into one and swept it to the side.
“Other than that, you are the same as back then. You haven’t changed at all.”
Kaiso thought. That fellow is definitely trying to insult me right now.
“The same? Are you making fun of me right now?”
“What? No, no. It’s not like that….”
Troy was startled and flustered. But Kaiso did not even register such a reaction. In his head, he was endlessly comparing his radiant younger days with his miserable present. There was no way they were the same. Although he did not want to admit it himself, it was safe to say that the Kaiso from ten years ago and the Kaiso of now were completely different people. Power, looks, personality, honor, everything he had and enjoyed had vanished like a ghost of the past.
The rumor that the great Duke Windermere had become a cripple must have surely spread to the north as well. So what was the reason for coming all this way? The answer was obvious.
“Don’t tell me you came to see for yourself how broken I’ve become?”
“What? What do you mean by that…. I just, I couldn’t say thank you back then. I really wanted to express my gratitude. And I wanted to repay Your Grace.”
Troy answered urgently. He seemed quite bewildered, as if he had not expected this kind of reaction from Kaiso at all. His effort to somehow fix the situation was pitiable. However, Kaiso, whose feelings were already hurt beyond repair, could not speak kindly.
“You’ll get to do plenty of repaying. Since the me of now is a cripple who can’t even get a book without you.”
“Your Grace!”
As if angry, Troy placed both hands on his hips and spoke firmly.
“You shouldn’t use such bad words for yourself, Your Grace!”
Kaiso looked up at Troy with an expressionless face.
“What does that have to do with you?”
“Th, that’s because….”
Troy rolled his eyes, searching for something to say, and then finally, as if he had made up his mind, he clenched both his fists.
“Because I respect you, Your Grace, and I really like you. I’ve liked you for all ten years. I really missed you. I’m so happy to meet you again like this….”
Troy confessed quickly and clutched his heart. He trembled, unable to control his nervous heart. Seeing this, Kaiso frowned.
“Right, so what are your impressions of seeing the crazy, half-crippled duke?”
“Your Grace, please don’t say such things.”
Troy’s face now looked like he was about to cry. But Kaiso was just stating the facts.
Troy tried to continue speaking, but Kaiso stopped him by raising his hand. He did not want to hear anything more.
“Leave now.”
“Your Grace….”
“I said, leave.”
Troy’s eyes wavered 불안하게. He must be very confused right now. Because the Kaiso in his memory was surely a very wonderful person. He would not have come all the way from the distant north to the south just to see this sorry state, but he had unintentionally disappointed him. However, the Kaiso Windermere that Troy so wanted to meet no longer existed anywhere, so there was nothing he could do about it.
“…Then please rest, Your Grace.”
After Troy left, Kaiso, left alone, was seized by a miserable feeling. He already regretted his actions from just a moment ago. He was ashamed for having poured out his inner feelings on an innocent fellow.
‘No, it’s for the better.’
An aide, by nature, should just silently move Kaiso’s body around like a piece of luggage and help with menial tasks. There was nothing good in keeping someone like Troy by his side, who would make him recall past memories by talking about being a savior and what not.
Kaiso called for Gordon and ordered him to hire a new aide immediately. Gordon expressed his difficulty, saying the deadline was tight, but Kaiso had already made up his mind.
That night.
In his dream, Kaiso was running through an endless cave. He was out of breath, his wind reaching the tip of his chin.
‘Captain!’
‘Aaargh!’
A scream full of pain rang in his ears. Kaiso wanted to turn back toward where the sound came from, but his legs would not move as he wished. He continued to run forward, forward.
‘Father!’
It was because, at the far end, the forest dragon was abducting Ingrid. He rushed over in a hurry, but this time his legs disappeared. Kaiso did not give up and crawled, dragging himself on the floor. But no matter how far he went, there was no sign of getting closer.
‘Oh, no. No!’
Finally, the dragon disappeared with the child, and the voices of his subordinates calling for him also vanished. Left alone in complete darkness, Kaiso felt suffocated. He could not endure it like this.
If he could atone for all his sins, he would rather die. The reason he had been living so wretchedly after that horrific battle was all because of his daughter, Ingrid. But if he did not have the child, if he lost even the child, he had no more reason to live.
He felt his body being sucked into a sticky swamp. He did not resist. If his whole body could sink like this and he could never open his eyes again, he could not wish for more.
“Please….”
Just then, a single ray of light was cast before him. Kaiso did not even think to grab the light and just stared at it blankly. Then the light struggled. It was as if it was begging him to grab it. As if possessed, at the same moment he grasped that light with one hand, Kaiso woke up from his dream. Tears streamed down from his eyes.
“Heok….”
He had certainly fallen asleep while sitting in the wheelchair, but somehow he was now lying on a soft bed. He blinked his eyes in a half-asleep state. Looking around, a shadow was sitting by his side.
“…Troy?”
Troy gently and meticulously wiped the sweat that had beaded on Kaiso’s forehead. Kaiso, not yet fully awake from sleep, could not grasp the situation well. Why was this fellow here? He was sure he had left the mansion and returned to the north.
“I apologize for coming in without permission. It seemed like you were having a nightmare.”
Looking to the side, the room’s window was wide open. It seemed this fellow had broken in through the window.
As Kaiso panted heavily for breath, Troy gently patted his chest. Then, a sense of peace slowly began to return. Troy whispered softly in a pleasant low voice.
“It’s alright. I will be by your side, so please sleep a little more.”
Those words sounded like a lullaby, and without a moment to think further, Kaiso fell asleep just like that.