ICYM Ch 45

Episode 45

I had planned to catch the bus before 6:30 pm, but when I came to my senses, it was already well past 7 pm.

The bus on a weekend evening was crowded, but luckily, two empty seats opened up right in front of us, so we were able to sit together.

I sat by the window, and Kendrick sat on the aisle side. I placed the shopping bag under my legs.

The legroom was fine, but Kendrick’s shoulders were so broad that every time the bus jolted, his arm brushed against mine.

“It’s hot.”

“Probably because it’s crowded, and the heater’s on too.”

“Yeah.”

Blaming the bus driver who had turned on the heater just because the weather had gotten a little chilly, I reached toward the window and asked, “Should I open it a little?”

“Yeah.”

Since I was closest to the window, I tried to open it, but because I was too close, it wouldn’t budge. I struggled for a moment before a large hand reached over me.

“Maybe… I should do it.”

“Yeah.”

When he cracked the window open, cold air rushed in. The sweat that had formed on my forehead from the heat quickly cooled.

As I could finally breathe easier, the events of the day drifted through my mind. I was drained, but I’d enjoyed myself. And once again, I realized just how much my circumstances had changed.

It felt different from just going out as part of weekend activities.

“I want to go on a trip.”

The words slipped out before I could think.

“A trip?”

The words hadn’t passed through my brain before coming out, and it was a truth I hadn’t even realized myself. Only after saying it did I notice.

“Yeah. I think it would be fun to go on a day trip next time.”

If we went farther away, the chances of running into anyone we knew would be even lower.

If I were to go out again, a day trip wouldn’t be a bad idea.

“…Yeah.”

Kendrick’s agreement strangely made me feel ticklish, so I leaned toward the window.

“The scenery outside is pretty.”

“…Yeah. Really pretty.”

Focused on the view outside, I didn’t notice. Kendrick’s reply of “pretty” wasn’t directed at the scenery we were both looking at, but at me.

When we got off the bus, the chilly air immediately wrapped around us. While the people around us hurried off in different directions, we spent a moment fixing our clothes and adjusting the shopping bag.

“Did you make sure you didn’t forget anything?”

“I just need to re-tie my shoelaces.”

“Okay. Take your time.”

Kendrick waited patiently while I dawdled.

And there was a reason for my dawdling.

What excuse should I use?

I thought the gift alone wasn’t enough, so I had planned to buy a cake as well. But I hadn’t found the chance.

By the time we arrived at our destination, it was already well past 7:30 pm, and the bakery would be closing soon.

Should I just say I’ll buy a cake and go together?

It wouldn’t be as touching, but at least we’d still get the cake.

“Hey.”

Rrrr.

Just as I opened my mouth, Kendrick’s bag suddenly vibrated loudly like a relief pitcher rushing in to save the game. He pulled out his phone, checked the screen, and furrowed his brows. When I peeked over, the word “Father” was written in large letters.

“Sorry.”

“No, go ahead and take it!”

“Weren’t you about to say something?”

“I was just going to say I’m thirsty, so I’d go buy some water.”

“Really?”

“Do you want one too?”

“I’m fine.”

“Okay. Then I’ll be right back.”

Without even looking back, I ran off in a hurry. But despite running so fast and being out of breath, the cakes were already sold out.

“What should we do? The cakes are sold out.”

“…What?”

For some reason, nothing was going my way today.

With a hollow feeling, I trudged back. Kendrick was already done with his call and stood waiting for me under a streetlight.

“The water?”

Ah, right. I was so deflated from hearing there was no cake that I didn’t even have the energy to come up with an excuse, so I just blurted something out.

“They said they don’t sell water.”

“Water…?”

“Yeah.”

Even with my suspicious answer, Kendrick didn’t doubt me. Instead, he offered an alternative.

“Should we buy it somewhere else?”

“No, I wasn’t that thirsty. Let’s just go.”

“Shall we?”

“Yeah.”

“Is it okay if we don’t go separately?”

“…Should we take a little detour instead?”

Either way, curfew was already tight, so the chances of bumping into someone on the way were slim.

“Yeah.”

But the reason I’d suggested taking a detour was because of something else.

Every so often, between alleys or under big trees, there were benches placed here and there. That was my real destination.

Walking side by side, I spotted a bench and hurried ahead to sit down. Since the bench faced the way we’d come from, I could see Kendrick’s face as he followed.

Thankfully, there was a streetlight right in front of us, so it wasn’t as dark as I’d feared.

“Sit here for a bit.”

I wanted to give it to him before we went back to the dorms. While we were still together.

“…Turns out I don’t know your taste as well as I thought.”

“Hm?”

“I don’t have to write your name on it again^[1], do I?”

At my playful tone, Kendrick let out a low laugh as he took the gift bag.

“And this too.”

I handed over the small paper bag with the keychain I had kept in my pocket.

“Thanks.”

“…I picked something you could use, even if you don’t like it.”

Kendrick’s roommate, Owen, wasn’t the type to tease someone over pajamas, so it should be fine.

Though he might think to himself that it’s a weird taste.

There was nothing I could do about that.

Not even knowing what was inside, Kendrick hugged the gift with a joyful expression.

“Thanks. I didn’t think you’d get me something. Can I open it?”

“…Do whatever you want.”

As if he’d been waiting, he pulled the box out of the shopping bag. I swallowed dryly and studied his expression. Why did this make me so nervous?

When Kendrick opened the box, neatly folded pajamas were revealed. After unfolding the pajama top and realizing what the gift was, Kendrick laughed.

“Haha. Pajamas with a cat pattern^[2].”

It wasn’t the reaction I’d expected. Afraid he was just being polite, I emphasized, “If I’d known earlier, I would’ve gotten you something better.”

“I like this.”

At my words, Kendrick gave a small nod and carefully folded the pajamas again, putting them back into the shopping bag.

I had been ready to say I had the same ones if he got upset and said they were horribly tacky, so his reaction felt anticlimactic.

“I’ll check the small one later inside. I might drop it and lose it if I fiddle with it here.”

“That’s the keychain we looked at earlier.”

“…The cat?”

“Yeah.”

“Thanks. I’m really happy.”

The pajamas were the more expensive gift, the one I’d agonized over, and yet his reaction was stronger with the keychain. Why did he like it so much?

“…Do you like accessories like this?”

I wondered if he had secretly liked small, cute things all along. Whenever we studied together, everything Kendrick had—his notebooks, pencil case—were nothing but straight lines, muted colors, and neat designs.

“No, not really.”

“Really?”

At my doubtful look, Kendrick tucked the small paper bag into the shopping bag holding the pajamas and explained.

“It’s not that I like accessories like this. It’s just that your badge looks like Coco, and my keychain looks like Nabi, so I like it.”

It wasn’t just that it resembled Nabi; he even brought up my badge. I didn’t know why, but in the end, it didn’t matter.

I was just relieved he liked at least one of them.

“Shall we head back now? You look cold.”

“No, it’s not over yet.”

With a serious expression, I opened the cross-body bag I was carrying.

I had bought it to give him, but I had gone back and forth for a long time on whether I should.

“How about cupcakes instead? We even have decoration pens where you can write on top.”

“Then let’s do that.”

I had bought a few cupcakes instead of a cake. Time was tight, and it was my first time doing something like that, so if I had thought for even a second, I would’ve known the writing wouldn’t come out well. But I was swept along by the shop owner’s words and agreed.

Thanks to the shop owner’s thoughtfulness, the frosting was flattened so I could write on top.

“…That’s unique.”

“Thank you.”

Remembering that moment when I accepted the shop owner’s squeezed-out compliment, I took out the neatly wrapped cupcakes.

“I was going to buy a cake, but they said it was sold out.”

“…So when you said you were buying water earlier, it was actually for this?”

“Yeah. They said the cake was sold out.”

One on its own felt too little, so I bought two. At least the second one had come out a bit better than the first.

“This time, your name’s written on it.”

Happy Birth- day

I smiled awkwardly at the cupcake, where the “h” and “d” were oddly spaced apart, spelling “Happy Birthday” in a clumsy way. Seeing him look so happy over something so small made me proud, but at the same time, I regretted not doing something nicer.  

“Should we light a candle too?”

“I’m fine without it.”

“We’ve already taken it out. Let’s light it here and blow it out before we go.”

Getting carried away on my own, I stuck my hand into the cupcake bag, rummaging around for candles, even though Kendrick was telling me it was fine.

But there weren’t any.

“…Huh?”

The shop owner had said they’d throw in candles as service, but no matter how much I searched the bag, they weren’t there.

Things kept going wrong today, and of course, it had to end like this, too.