IPSTDS Chapter 34

Chapter 34

Lee Kangil showed up exactly thirty minutes later.

Nahyuk knew where his lab was—the place he spent more time at than his own home—so it was hard to believe he made it here in just thirty minutes.

Looking like he had rushed over, Kangil grabbed Nahyuk’s wrist the moment he was guided to the second floor by a housekeeper.

Nahyuk looked up at him, panting heavily, his coat barely thrown on.

“You, explain yourself. Now.”

Nahyuk had no idea why Kangil was so worked up.

“Kangil, wait a second. I get that you’re in a rush, but I was in the middle of watching something important.”

“What?”

Nahyuk and Daon had been sitting side by side on the living room sofa upstairs, watching an old romance movie while waiting for Kangil.

Forced to stand by the grip on his wrist, Nahyuk instead spoke like he was scolding Kangil.

“Calm down. Sit next to me and watch the movie first. We can talk after—it’s not too late.”

“Did you seriously just suggest watching a movie?”

“It’s almost over. There’s some thick juice too—drink some.”

“…Huh?”

“Don’t spill it.”

“…”

The calm, strange conversation clearly left Kangil dumbfounded. Seizing the moment, Nahyuk made him sit down beside him.

On the white wall in front of the sofa, a film was playing via projector.

“Why are you even watching this crap? I’ve already seen this movie.”

Kangil muttered that he had watched it with someone whose name he couldn’t even remember anymore. Nahyuk, unfazed, replied:

“Watch it again.”

At that firm tone, Kangil clamped his lips shut.

Soon, the movie reached its climax. The female lead confessed her love to the male lead.

But he didn’t accept her love—even though he clearly loved her back.

The male lead had been disabled in an accident years ago and suffered from severe depression. He didn’t believe he could love her for the rest of their lives.

In the end, the movie concluded with his suicide.

Nahyuk had watched the film even before becoming Yoon Noah, and even now, his feelings hadn’t changed.

“If I were the male lead, I wouldn’t have chosen death.”

Could someone really choose death when they loved someone?

That choice was something Nahyuk, whose one wish in life was “to love,” couldn’t accept.

Even if he had to live the rest of his life disabled, he didn’t think he could give up on the person he loved.

He wondered what others thought.

As the ending credits rolled, Nahyuk looked at Daon.

“What about you, Daon?”

“I think… I’d ask if they could die with me. I’d want to know if they loved me enough to die together.”

“You’re kind of cruel.”

“Still, I don’t think I’d actually die. Whether they agreed or not—I value my life.”

Daon’s calm voice continued evenly.

“That’s why I hope you get better, hyung.”

Nahyuk gazed at Daon with eyes damp with emotion.

Even Noah’s own parents didn’t care about this body, and yet here Daon was, worrying this much. Did he have wings hidden on his back?

Nahyuk then looked up at Kangil, who was still holding his wrist. His face was exhausted, yet somehow the fatigue only added to his charm.

His brows furrowed in confusion, unable to make sense of the situation—yet he wouldn’t let go of Nahyuk’s wrist, as if afraid he might run off.

“And you, Kangil?”

“I wish they’d all just die.”

A response full of cynicism.

“Why are you so angry?”

“Shit, do I not look like I should be pissed? I rush over here, and you three are watching a damn movie. I didn’t come here to watch films.”

Despite his anger, Kangil had quietly waited until the credits rolled. Nahyuk appreciated that unexpectedly gentlemanly gesture.

If it had been Seo Dowoong, he’d have thrown a tantrum already.

But that civility ended there. As if he couldn’t hold back anymore, Kangil grabbed both of Nahyuk’s shoulders tightly.

Nahyuk wondered how he could comfort Kangil, who had rushed here over a misunderstanding.

“Now answer me. Did he really suck you off?”

“Suck…”

Nahyuk blushed furiously, understanding the implication. His back felt suddenly warm, as if he’d broken into a sweat.

He stammered, as if confessing a terrible secret.

“Uh… Kangil, Daon was talking about my clothes. He said he’d wash my clothes.”

“Yeah, he sucked your—wait, clothes?”

Kangil blinked rapidly, unable to believe it.

He had seriously thought Daon had sucked him off. What a ridiculous misunderstanding.

‘What kind of thoughts does this guy live with to jump to that kind of conclusion?’

“I spilled juice on my clothes. Daon knows how to get stains out.”

“Ha! Cut the crap with the unbelievable excuses.”

“If you don’t believe me, I’ll show you the dirty clothes.”

“But what I heard was clearly…”

Kangil trailed off, thinking for a moment, then suddenly turned to stare at Daon with a look of realization.

As soon as he saw Daon’s mischievous smile, he seemed to finally accept the misunderstanding.

“You little bastard, it was you, wasn’t it?”

“Mr. Kangil, I never said anything dirty.”

“You… son of a—”

“You misunderstood, barged in, and started cursing.”

“Say that again, Kim Daon. You made it sound that way on purpose.”

“No. You only misunderstood because you already think of Noah hyung in a shady way. If I were you, I wouldn’t have jumped to that conclusion.”

It hit the mark. Even Kangil, who never backed down, went silent.

Caught between the two, Nahyuk glanced back and forth at their faces.

Daon didn’t avoid Kangil’s gaze, still smiling softly. Kangil’s expression, on the other hand, was growing more and more twisted.

Eventually, Kangil looked away first. The moment the winner of the verbal spar was decided.

“…Noah.”

Nahyuk felt a bit off when Kangil called him by name in such a quiet voice.

He missed the moment to reply, and as if not expecting a response, Kangil spoke what he wanted anyway.

“Let’s talk. Just the two of us.”

For some reason, his voice sounded desperate. Kangil had always held the upper hand thanks to the experimental drug.

If Nahyuk refused now, he felt like Kangil might actually cling to him—just like he had once clung to Kangil, begging for the drug.

It felt… oddly satisfying.

But more than that, Nahyuk found this unfamiliar side of Kangil strangely attractive.

‘A man who never clung to me is now desperate for me. That feels kind of amazing.’

Aside from developing new drugs, Kangil didn’t seem particularly interested in love or relationships. But what if someone came along that he loved enough to give his life for?

Maybe then—only then—would his thoughts on that movie change.

“I wish they’d all just die.”

Not that kind of answer.

But maybe…

“I’d beg her to love me for the rest of my life, even as I live disabled.”

Would he ever say something like that?

“Noah. Hey.”

Unable to bear the silence, Kangil pushed Nahyuk again.

“Let’s go to your room right now.”

Looking frustrated, he ran his fingers roughly through his hair.

“Alright. Let’s talk, just the two of us. But stop messing up your hair. It’s a mess.”

“A mess? Did you just call me a mess?”

His twisted lips looked fierce, and the way Kangil gazed at him was heavy and intense. Nahyuk shrank back slightly as he replied.

“…Y-yeah.”

“Ever since I imagined you getting sucked off by another guy, I’ve already been a mess.”

“…”

“Got it?”

---

Was there any word that captured his state better than “a mess”? Lee Kangil didn’t think so.

He had taken Kim Daon’s call while rotting away in his lab.

Ever since he’d resolved to save Yoon Noah, Kangil had been deeply immersed in studying the illness plaguing him.

Yes, he had developed an experimental drug—but it wasn’t a miracle cure. Hadn’t Noah lost consciousness even after taking it?

That’s why he wanted to develop supplementary medication or at least find something to help prolong his life.

At first, he’d started for the sake of his career. But now, his desire to save Yoon Noah had grown far beyond that.

Maybe he had kissed him too often. Maybe that was why his feelings had deepened.

He figured Noah must feel the same. After all, he still remembered the shy look on Noah’s face after the kiss they shared at the cinema.

Yoon Noah now welcomed his kisses.

That’s why Kangil even began to entertain the naive thought that he, not Kim Daon, might be Noah’s favorite.

After that, he threw himself into the research even more. He wanted to win Noah over completely—with a perfect drug.

But unfortunately, the research wasn’t progressing, and his eyes were growing hollower by the day. The other researchers, who occasionally crossed paths with him, had started reacting with alarm whenever they saw him.

“K-Kangil… Do you know how scary the vibe you’re giving off right now is?”

Was he really looking that bad?

Trying to shake things off—and check on Noah’s condition—he called him. It was a bit late, but he doubted Noah would be asleep.

But the one who picked up was someone unexpected.

It was Kim Daon—Yoon Noah’s supposed favorite.