IPSTDS Chapter 73

Chapter 73

When it came to sex with a man, Kangil more or less knew where things were meant to go. But looking at Yoon Noah—his whole body flushed red, melting apart beneath him—he didn’t seem like he could handle it.

For some reason, everything about Noah felt like it was for the first time. Kangil didn’t want to leave him with any bad memories of sex.

Consideration? Altruism? No, it didn’t come from anything warm like that. Kangil had never once thought of himself as selfless.

He just didn’t want to see Noah hurt or in pain.

Without hesitation, Kangil pressed their cocks together. Wrapping his large hands around both, he stroked up and down. Noah’s body bent like a bow under the pleasure, tears streaming as though he couldn’t handle the rush of arousal, clinging desperately to Kangil.

Yet Kangil was captivated, not by his own thick shaft laced with bulging veins, but by the smoothness of Noah’s pale one.

“Haa…”

His breath burned as it spilled out.

He wanted to grip those pale legs that kept trying to close up in embarrassment, spread them wide, and drive himself into Noah’s hidden opening. He imagined even that place would be blushing red.

Soon he came undone, spilling across Noah’s stomach. Noah had already finished earlier, his own release sticky on Kangil’s hand.

“Noah, now we can…”

But then he noticed—there was no sound of panting anymore.

Lifting his gaze from Noah’s sleek shaft, Kangil realized the boy’s eyes were closed, his body limp.

“…Don’t tell me you actually fell asleep.”

Yoon Noah really had drifted off. His body, which had been gasping and heaving moments before, had gone slack.

Kangil let out a sigh tinged with disappointment. To think he had collapsed into sleep from nothing more than rubbing against each other. What was he supposed to do with him?

Even knowing Noah was ill, Kangil felt a dangerous urge to wake him and drag him along until the end.

But at last, he shook his head.

He wasn’t kind, nor was he a gentleman—but he didn’t want to force things.

Noah always carried a fragile air, as if he might vanish at any moment. Kangil couldn’t treat him carelessly.

It was as though Noah lived constantly with death in mind, never believing Kangil’s promise to keep him alive.

I really meant it when I said I’d save you.

“….”

Kangil lay on his side, studying Noah’s sleeping face.

“What am I supposed to do with you?”

He muttered, and then, feeling a childish sort of spite at Noah for falling asleep in such a moment, he reached out and pinched the tip of his nose.

“Mmmh…”

Noah let out a faint groan, and Kangil chuckled quietly.

Annoying, but cute. Someone he liked, but didn’t quite love. How was he supposed to live with that?

Kangil didn’t believe he could give Noah the kind of love he wanted. The boy was surely dreaming of something straight out of a romance film—grand, unrealistic love.

Something like, I’ll die in your place. That kind of holy devotion.

But Kangil could say with certainty: he couldn’t die for Noah. Though Seo Dowoong occasionally irked him, overall, he was satisfied with his life.

Still, who knew what might happen later?

Maybe one day he would lose himself so completely in Noah that he would die for him. The odds weren’t zero—just very slim.

Gently, Kangil cleaned Noah’s body, dressed him back into the clothes he had stripped away, and lay down close beside him.

Sleep wouldn’t come. He stared for a long time at Noah’s face, unaware of the burning gaze fixed on him, undisturbed in his dreams.

What kind of dream was he having?

Kangil found himself wondering suddenly if he had ever appeared in it.

* * *

Without realizing it, Nahyuk had fallen asleep, and he was dreaming.

The setting of the dream was the schoolyard, now so familiar to his eyes.

In that time, Yoon Noah was in the classroom, leaning his face out the window and looking down at something.

Because Nahyuk was seeing through Noah’s eyes in the dream, he immediately understood what Noah was looking at.

Seo Dowoong and Kim Daon.

Even from afar, the two stood out with their striking appearances.

Seo Dowoong had a classically handsome face, while Kim Daon, though delicate in features, didn’t look fragile—tall and slim, his beauty was of a different sort.

The weight of Yoon Noah’s gaze, unable to tear itself away from them, was heavy with gloom. That sadness flowed into Nahyuk as well.

At that moment, someone slung a heavy arm around Noah’s shoulders. The unpleasant smell that came with him made Noah wrinkle his brows.

“Get off. You reek of cigarettes.”

“Want one yourself?”

Instead of pulling away, the culprit chuckled as if Noah already belonged to him. It was Park Sangcheol.

The moment Noah turned his head, he caught sight of Sangcheol’s yellowed teeth. Smoking so much—how could they not be stained?

“I don’t do things that are bad for my health.”

Noah answered curtly and pulled his body completely away from the window. He was worried Seo Dowoong might see him hanging around Sangcheol.

Noah and Seo Dowoong were still locked in a cold war.

When Dowoong had lashed out, asking if Noah had stepped in because he didn’t trust him, he had only grown more dismissive afterward—going out of his way to be friendly with Kim Daon instead.

All of it grated on Noah’s nerves.

He knew it was too late, but he even thought maybe he should stop being close to Sangcheol.

But then again, if he ignored him completely, wouldn’t Sangcheol turn his malice back onto Seo Dowoong?

The conflict tore Noah in two.

With his head aching, Noah sat down and buried his face in his arms.

Sangcheol, either oblivious or truly stupid, plopped down beside him and poked him.

“Hey, are you sick?”

Please just go away, Noah thought.

But Sangcheol asked again.

“I asked if you’re sick.”

After a deep breath, Noah raised his head.

“…Why are you so desperate to go after Seo Dowoong?”

Surprisingly, Sangcheol answered without hesitation. Maybe he had mistakenly thought Noah was a real friend.

“You know my family’s company is a subcontractor for his group, right? Because of his company, my family took a huge loss. I saw my father cry for the first time in my life—a man who’d only ever worked himself to the bone. So I figured, if no one else would, I’d get revenge on that bastard.”

“…”

Isn’t running a business bound to bring unfair losses at least once? Noah thought so.

Though he didn’t know much about the family business—being the child they had all agreed to ignore—he at least understood that nothing, not business nor people, could ever go well all the time. Even Seo Dowoong’s company surely had its share of troubles.

But Sangcheol’s vision had narrowed, fixed only on his hatred. His face was twisted with nothing but rage as he spoke of Seo Dowoong.

“And Seo Dowoong’s so fucking perfect, isn’t he? He looked down on me, sneered at me, acted like I was nothing. So yeah, I want to see him crawl at least once.”

Listening silently until now, Noah finally responded.

“…Park Sangcheol. So what, your family went bankrupt because of Seo Dowoong?”

His voice was filled only with irritation. He had tolerated Sangcheol long enough; this was the limit.

“No. We lost money, but we didn’t go under.”

“Then cut it out. Keep overreaching like this, and you’ll be the one who ends up ruined.”

At those blunt words, Sangcheol’s face hardened.

“Fuck… So you’re on Seo Dowoong’s side too?”

“I’m not taking anyone’s side.”

“But you’ve seen his two-faced side, haven’t you? Why still defend him?”

“What do you mean?”

Sangcheol let out a long sigh before speaking again.

“You don’t even see me as a friend. You only hang out with me because of Seo Dowoong. Did you think I wouldn’t know? You think I’m some pathetic idiot?”

…Weren’t you?

Noah almost said it but held his tongue.

“I knew. And still, I stuck around because watching you try so hard for Seo Dowoong was funny and pathetic. But do you really think Seo Dowoong doesn’t know it too?”

Even someone as dim as Park Sangcheol knew it—there was no way Seo Dowoong didn’t.

And because Noah silently agreed with him, he couldn’t say anything back.