ISTHR 155

１５５

[Well, that’s how it is so don’t force him to say it, okay? You know, Saine will probably say it if you threaten him that you will leave if he doesn’t say it but, he does have a tender side to him. You may think that it’s ridiculous for the cord to be cursed, and I also think the same. But the folks here don’t say it because they are afraid of what might happen. I feel like Saine is susceptible to that kind of suggestion.]

I kind of get what he means. He had no problems functionally, but he couldn’t get an erection for months. I think the reason why people here are impotent is because of the strong suggestibility. The trigger is the priest’s curse, but the strongest reason is that they are made to believe that they can’t get an erection unless they undergo the Ceremony.[If that’s the case then I wish he had explained it to me.]

[No, like I said, that can’t happen either.]

[Even an explanation is forbidden?]

[That’s right. Explaining to the person you wish to express your feelings to why you can’t say it is also expressing your feelings to them.]

[Hmm, then, how do the people here express how they feel?]

[There’s no need to do that.]

[Why?]

[Aren’t you his Reincarnator? There’s no need to ascertain is feelings then, is there?]

Our thoughts differ on such fundamental levels. There’s no concept of cheating, so there’s no sense of crisis that if he doesn’t confess his feelings, the other person will run away or be taken by someone else.

[The Reincarnators want to know.  I want to know so bad how Saine thinks of me. Like if Saine is in love with me or if it’s alright to be by his side, I always wonder that to myself.]

[There is no need to wonder about that. Saine definitely cares about you. As proof of that, doesn’t he often say it? “My Reincarnator”.]

Huh? I raised my face in confusion.

[Pointing and calling?]1 

[What’s that?]

Dole laughs out loud.

[I’ve been wanting to say it too. My Reincarnator. It’s a nice phrase.]

[Isn’t that just a confirmation? “He’s my Reincarnator so I better give up”, I though he was telling that to himself.]

[What’s he trying to tell himself?]

[Dole, you said it. That you hoped to have a Reincarnator too. But since there’s nothing you can do if the wrong one comes out, so won’t you just give up on the fact that this is your Reincarnator? Every time Saine calls me his Reincarnator, I always thought that he actually doesn’t want me. but he just tells himself that because it can’t be helped and make do with me.]

[U-uh… Hmm. It’s kinda different, you know? This is tough. I have an idea of what I want, and most of the time, what I get isn’t quite it, but… well, whatever. I guess I just sort of give up. That’s life, right? Things don’t usually go the way you hope, but it’s not bad enough to get all down about it either. In the end, it’s just one of those things where you go, ‘Eh, that’s how it is,’ and move on.] 

I don’t know if that’s how it is. I didn’t fall in love in my previous life. But there were people around me who were in relationships. I heard them talk about how much they liked the other person before they started dating on school trips. There was also a guy who got confessed to by someone he never expected and started dating. But that guy was also bragging about how cute she was. Nobody just gave up and thought, “Oh well, this is good enough” before they started dating.

[Well, you’ll understand when you’re an adult. Not just with your husband, but after going through various experiences, you start learning to come to terms with your situation.]

Coming to terms with reality—I get that. My whole life has been full of that kind of stuff. I’d just look at how things were different from other families and go, “Well, that’s how it is.”

But romance… I still don’t get it. That’s one thing I never had in my old life. Dad and Mom said they had this huge, passionate love, full of fights and drama, but they never ended up separating.

Maybe there are people who give up on love too—who just settle for whatever feels good enough. If I’d lived longer in my old life, grown into an adult there, maybe I would’ve seen that too.

[I kind of get what you’re trying to say, Dole.]

When I agreed with him, he patted head repeatedly.

[You’re nice, and small.]

[What’s with that?]

[Small things are cute, aren’t they? You know, once my Reincarnator comes out, I want to pamper her like crazy. Reincarnators are small, and they stay small no matter how much times passed. I’ll brag about My Reincarnator to the guys waiting for the Ceremony, acting like a real husband.]

[Is “My Reincarnator” a bragging phrase?]

[That’s right. It gives you a little sense of superiority. Just imagining the scene of me saying, “You’re my Reincarnator”, makes me warm here.]

Dole rubbed his muscular chest, then put his hand under the table.

[……Even if you’re happy, you’ve got to hold yourself back for 3 days, okay?]

I made sure to emphasize to Dole, who was definitely clutching his crotch.

[I said I know. After 3 days…… mmm……ugh~…… fufufufufufu.] 

His suppressed laughter is scary. I think Dole’s Reincarnator should get to know what dour grass is.

I wonder if everyone here has a large penis. Saine is large, Dole also has a large body so to correspond with that, I think that will be big too. I wonder how it is with Olphynn? Compared to Saine, he’s just slimmer—not really small or anything. Maybe he’s got something like those statues I saw in art textbooks—like, you know, that kind of impressive thing. Then… does that mean he’s big too?

While I was busy imagining another guy’s crotch, something important suddenly came to mind.

[Aaah! Oh no!! I gotta go out for a bit!]

As I stood up, a pain and itch ran through my ass, and I leaned back slightly.

[What are you doing? You’re really something I can never get bored of watching.]

[A-anyway, I gotta go.]

While protecting my ass, I moved as quickly as I could. It was hard to lift my knees, and I ended up tiptoeing. As I was walking around in a weird position, Dole grabbed my arm.

[I can’t possibly let you go out without Saine.]

[I’m just going out for a bit. I’m going to the Men’s Club. Allec’s house is in the Northeastern part, but it’s close from here.]

I think it takes about 20 minutes one way. For me now, it takes about 30 minutes. An hour is enough to go there, take care of business, and come back.

[Tell him to go home first when he comes back. I can do some shopping in the Northeastern area and be back in time for dinner to be prepared.]

[Now, now, calm down. You already forgot the thing I said before, didn’t you?]

I have to hurry and tell Allec, or else he’ll stick a rod in his husband’s dick. As I panicked and thrashed about, Dole stood up and pulled me to him.

[If I let you go alone, I’ll be scolded by Saine. That guy’s quite troublesome once he’s pissed. If you ahve somewhere you want to go, I’ll go with you.]

[You will? But I feel bad.]

[Don’t worry about it. Just pretend that you’re my Reincarnator.]

It’s not okay to be alone with anyone other than your husband. There are some rules here that a Male Reincarnator couldn’t understand. It’s better to travel alone than to be with someone other than your husband. So if Dole is going to come with me, I’d better assume he’s my husband.

It’s been a year since I was reincarnated, so I understand that sort of thing too.

[Thanks! Then, Dole is now my husband.]

­When I agreed and say, ‘Okay‘, something flew past above my head and made contact with Dole’s face.

1- It’s an occupational safety method. This was mentioned by one of the male Reincarnators, I think it was Haruka, many chapters earlier.