KMS Chapter 1:…Put your clothes on, then get the hell out of here right now!

Lu Xiping woke up and, as usual, reached for his glasses first.

He had lived in this studio for over a year while studying abroad, and it had practically become his second home. Normally, he always placed his glasses beside the pillow on his left. All it took was stretching out his arm to grab them. But the truly horrifying thing about this seemingly ordinary morning was that when Lu Xiping reached out, he did not touch his glasses. Instead, his hand landed on a piece of bone that was arched, tall, and hard. Reason and instinct both told him that this was someone’s nose bridge, and the skin had warmth.

God bless. It had to be a nose bridge, and not the skull of some giant lizard, okay?

Lu Xiping’s eyes flew open. Propping himself up, he sat up abruptly, only to see a completely naked body lying on the large bed he had painstakingly outfitted with a four-piece bedding set.

And it was a man.

The air was thick with the scent of heather after fierce combat. Shirts, a jacket, and pants lay piled together on the floor. All four corners of the carpet were curled up. A dull ache radiated from his waist. His limbs were weak, and every bone in his body felt as though it had been smashed apart and reassembled. His underwear was long gone. In the trash can were several plump, tightly knotted Trojans^[1].

They proclaimed a single fact.

Lu Xiping had engaged in the most intimate interactive behavior in human history with the man on the bed.

His heart turned into a pool of dead water. His mind was blank with dazed disbelief, and he wondered if he was still dreaming.

With eight hundred degrees of myopia, Lu Xiping could not make out the face of the culprit. Supporting himself with one hand on the mattress, he leaned over the man who had his back to him to retrieve his glasses.

As he moved, the blanket slid down, and the shocking claw marks on the man’s back were abruptly exposed to the air.

Line after line, crisscrossing like ravines. The skin over the shoulder blades had even been broken open, the wounds already scabbed over.

By reflex, Lu Xiping lowered his head.

Even though his vision was blurred, the mottled marks all over his own body, like those of a big calico cat, were impossible to miss.

The blanket slipped down, exposing Lu Xiping’s bare upper body. His skin was a cool, pale white. There was an oval bite mark at his collarbone, two bruises on his flat abdomen, and on one side of his thigh were fingerprints left behind by someone’s grip.

His two buttocks felt as if they had already detached from the bone, turned to water, and spread out against the soft mattress.

This was a young body that had completely lost its furnace door.

“…” Lu Xiping told himself he absolutely had to stay calm.

After finally getting hold of his glasses, he hurriedly set them on the bridge of his nose and at last saw the back of the man’s head clearly.

Excellent bone structure, a meticulously styled haircut, and a faint birthmark at the back of the neck.

Wait.

…A birthmark?

Lu Xiping’s breathing stalled. Just then, the man seemed to wake up as well, slowly turning his face toward him—

Standard East Asian features, but with deep-set eyes, sharp sword-like brows, an aura that was brilliant and unrestrained. His jawline was clean and razor-sharp, without a trace of excess flesh. His skin was exceptionally good, flawless even without any care.

To a face-obsessed person, he was so handsome it provoked divine wrath, his natural looks outstanding enough to look down on all rivals. To Lu Xiping, this face belonged in a horror movie.

“…Wei Shengyang.” Lu Xiping felt as if he had been struck by a bolt of lightning, blown apart until every hair on his body stood on end. “Please explain to me why you are sleeping in my bed.”

Wei Shengyang, male. His sworn enemy of a childhood friend. He had the handsome face of a film empress’s son, stood 189 centimeters tall, liked cooking, studied mathematics at University U, and had crowned himself the campus heartthrob.

The two of them had been at odds since childhood, never able to stand the sight of each other. Their relationship was one of pure competition: if you’re impressive, then I have to be even more impressive. If you’re a master’s student, then I have to be a PhD. If you’re a PhD, then I have to be an academician. Carrying the generational glory of their respective families, the two of them worked in perfect tacit understanding to place the other at the very top of their personal assassination lists.

The Wei and Lu families had deep ties, with ancestors who had once shared battlefield camaraderie, and they lived in the same government compound. After the founding of the nation, the Lu family relied on the wealth accumulated by their predecessors to enter real estate. After making a fortune, they washed their hands of it and, over the past few decades, had kept a low profile, cultivating the style of a scholarly household. Lu Xiping’s parents were both university professors. The Wei family, on the other hand, rode the wave of the internet boom to sudden prominence. Wei Shengyang’s father even married a film empress at thirty, so from the moment he was born, Wei Shengyang had been a rich young master with a golden spoon in his mouth.

And Wei Shengyang had a bad habit completely out of step with the vibe of official, celebrity, and wealthy second-generation families.

He liked to steal things from Lu Xiping.

Pillows Lu Xiping had slept on, he wanted to snatch. Pens Lu Xiping had used, he wanted to snatch. Shoes Lu Xiping had worn, he wanted to snatch too. A living, breathing tagalong copycat. In short, whatever Lu Xiping had, Wei Shengyang would clamor for his family to buy him the exact same thing.

Many years ago, when they were still in kindergarten, Lu Xiping had once questioned little classmate Wei Shengyang about why he did this.

At the time, Wei Shengyang, only six years old, lifted his chin arrogantly and planted his hands on his hips. “If a delicate person like you can use this kind of pillow, that means it’s good! Then of course I want to use it too. Only you are allowed to sleep well? Don’t I need to sleep?”

Lu Xiping understood.

This second-generation ancestor was treating him like a human mine detector^[2].

In the many years that followed, every single day was a battle.

They fought all the way to today, ending up sharing the same bed, lying face to face, mutually repulsed. And yet there had been a night of spring, naked hand-to-hand combat, and a floor full of wreckage.

Last night, Lu Xiping had been drinking. He attended the debate club’s celebration banquet. As a member of the opposing side who had taken Best Debater, there was naturally champagne to celebrate. After several rounds of alcohol, Lu Xiping stood dizzily at the roadside hailing a cab. Late-night L City was actually quite dangerous. For all he knew, an addict might walk up and pull a gun on him.

There was a debater on the team, a foreigner nearly one point nine meters tall, a handsome guy named Gene. Gene had been openly and covertly pursuing him. Lu Xiping had emphasized several times that his sexual orientation was female. Conversation after conversation led nowhere, and in the end he could only give Gene the cold shoulder. Last night, Gene had driven over and wanted to take him along. That kind of behavior was a bit like the prelude to picking up a corpse, so Lu Xiping immediately gave a clear no.

Gene acted as if he hadn’t heard, continuing to enthusiastically invite him, saying he would send him back to the studio.

After drinking, Lu Xiping had no strength. He had already been forcibly pushed into the car by Gene when a familiar RAV4 SUV suddenly cut in from the side, stopping them in the middle of the road. The headlights shone straight onto Gene, like an FBI arrest scene.

Wei Shengyang got out of the SUV, sternly ordering Gene to stop. He pulled Lu Xiping into his arms in one motion and said, this has nothing to do with you anymore, get lost.

After that…

After that, Lu Xiping blacked out.

He vaguely remembered a few fragmented scenes. Himself being laid down on the bed, one hand hooked around Wei Shengyang’s shoulder.

Wei Shengyang spread his legs and told him he had to take off his pants before sleeping.

He, on the other hand, grabbed Wei Shengyang’s hand and said he wanted to drink water.

Four lips suddenly pressed tightly together. Honey water was slowly poured into Lu Xiping’s mouth. After he swallowed it, the intruding tongue pinned down his tongue and swept through, plundering the air inside.

Then, the blanket on the large bed was rolled into a tangled heap. His ankle was gripped by Wei Shengyang, lifted up and propped against his waist, before falling back onto the mattress again because there was no strength to hold it.

“…” Recalling these fragmented scenes, Lu Xiping was utterly furious.

There had clearly been a hundred paths between him and Wei Shengyang that could have led to peaceful coexistence, yet they had chosen this one. The most obscene, unrestrained, and inconceivable one.

So Lu Xiping raised his hand and delivered a loud slap to the person on the bed.

“Wei Shengyang, you went crazy after drinking and took advantage of me!”

After saying that, the gears in his brain jammed for a moment, because his voice was far too hoarse. It had lost its usual clear, watery quality, completely unrecognizable as his own, and sounded utterly foreign.

The man covered his numb, stinging face and sat up. The first thing he said was infuriating. “Heh, I knew you’d hit me. I even guessed which hand you’d use.”

“The left hand, right?” Wei Shengyang said as he stood up. “Your dominant hand. You’re left-handed, your right hand doesn’t have much strength. Yesterday, when you grabbed me and wouldn’t let me leave, you also used your left hand. Yesterday you used this hand to keep me, asking me to serve you. Today you use this hand to hit me until I’m heartbroken. What is it, Xiping gege, does this count as using me and tossing me aside, starting something and then abandoning it?”

Originally, Lu Xiping wanted to curse him for spouting bullshit, but Wei Shengyang wasn’t wearing anything below. Standing up first thing in the morning, he was just openly airing himself out. This person seemed utterly shameless, able to get out of bed without a single scrap of cloth on him.

Or perhaps he was also a bit flustered and at a loss, speaking and acting without using his brain at all.

In Lu Xiping’s memory, this was indeed what Wei Shengyang was like when he got nervous.

See no evil. Lu Xiping immediately turned his face away, biting his lip hard as his blood rushed upward. He didn’t want to stay in the same room with this person for even a second. “…Put your clothes on, then get the hell out of here right now!”

An absurd day officially began.

Wei Shengyang put his clothes on and slipped into the bathroom, but he did not leave.

After both of them were fully awake, the atmosphere became indescribably subtle. To avoid the disastrous possibility of them coming to blows if they stayed in the same room, Wei Shengyang deliberately left space for both of them to cool down. Once inside, there was no sound at all. He was probably sitting on the toilet scrolling on his phone.

Lu Xiping, meanwhile, sat on the bed in a daze for several minutes, contemplating life.

It was said that every person’s fate was already set at birth, and everything that followed was merely moving along the script, inching closer to death. If he had known that at the age of twenty he would face an iron threshold like a fatal blow, he would definitely have chosen not to be born.

After finishing his contemplation, he picked up his phone and plugged it in to charge. A glance at the domestic time showed it was exactly five in the morning. So he turned on a VPN, hopped back home, and logged into his game to clear the daily activity tasks.

Lu Xiping’s life motto was to muddle through as long as possible.

Ever since coming to L City in Country M to study abroad, he had already seen people defecating on the subway, people snatching bags while speeding past on motorcycles, fully armed home invasion robberies, indiscriminate knife attacks on the street, explosives installed near the school, and advance warning letters sent to the news center threatening to blow up buildings.

Living in a foreign land, staying alive was enough.

Lu Xiping calmly finished his daily tasks, a faint sense of death lingering around his body.

He had slept with Wei Shengyang.

His phone’s background was full of private messages from fans. It had already been a week since Lu Xiping last posted his same-time comparison vlog. During this week, both he and Wei Shengyang had been busy rushing deadlines, with no time to film.

Wei Shengyang: …At the very least, I helped you once. You can’t be this ungrateful as a person. Besides, didn’t Aunt Juan tell you that it’s dangerous to be abroad and that you’re supposed to look out for each other with me? You treat your mom’s words like wind in your ears? If you had reported your plans to me last night, I could have gone to help you block the drinks. None of what came after would have happened. So you’re also at fault, right? My back is still burning hot right now. Do you have any idea how tiring it was to carry you back from the bar? If you don’t care about me, fine, but you’re even giving me attitude. In your heart, am I just a bed-warming duck? [crying hard][angry]

Seeing such a long string of messages come in, Lu Xiping thought it was some tear-soaked little essay.

Too many words. It gave him a headache. Lu Xiping took a deep breath.

Lu Xiping: Read.

Wei Shengyang: ?

Wei Shengyang: What do you mean.

Wei Shengyang: You make me wait forever just to reply with one word?

Wei Shengyang: Forget it. A busy person like you probably won’t remember to reply to me for the rest of your life, right?

They were clearly both in the studio, one in the bathroom, one by the bed. Just a few steps apart, yet they insisted on chatting over WeChat. The scene was extremely comical and extremely awkward inside. Both of them knew that last night had been a complete and total mistake.

Lu Xiping: …Shut up.

Lu Xiping: Please forget about this and pretend it never happened. Thanks for what you did at the bar entrance last night.

This time, Wei Shengyang did not reply instantly. It was quite a while before he reacted.

Wei Shengyang: What do you mean, pretend it never happened?

Wei Shengyang: You’re going to ignore our entire twenty years because of this one night?

“…”

Wei Shengyang: You don’t want to be friends with me anymore, is that it.

Wei Shengyang: Fine. Very fine.

Wei Shengyang: Last night I even helped you with my mouth first before going in. Don’t tell me you didn’t feel good. I don’t believe it.

Wei Shengyang: Reply to me.

Wei Shengyang: Are we really cutting ties?

Wei Shengyang: …You slept with me and you’re not taking responsibility at all like this?! T T I’m about to cry.

This thing had always been very good at turning the tables. In truth, the one whose ass really hurt still didn’t dare to sit down properly even now.

Lu Xiping held it in and replied rationally: What I mean is to turn the page. You can tell people you’re a virgin. I won’t expose you. Just treat it as if we didn’t do anything last night, understand?

Lu Xiping: After all, I wasn’t clear-headed. I don’t remember what happened. Responsibility is split half and half, but you take a little more, because you didn’t drink.

Wei Shengyang: Why do I take more. After you got drunk you hugged me and wouldn’t let me go. I’m also a hot-blooded, normal man… anyway, responsibility is half and half.

Seeing him spout nonsense, Lu Xiping let out a cold laugh.

Lu Xiping: So what if you’re hot-blooded. You couldn’t push me away? No way, Wei Shengyang. Could it be that you like me? Like me so much that you couldn’t even push away a drunken ghost with no strength in his limbs? Aren’t you an eight-foot-tall man, strong and powerful?

Wei Shengyang: Hah?

Wei Shengyang: I like you?

Wei Shengyang: How is that possible.

Wei Shengyang: You’re overthinking it.

---

Author’s Note:

This gong will spend the entire book making up for this one sentence.

The two of them have been inseparable since wearing split-crotch pants. Their usual way of getting along is constant verbal sparring, back and forth, but when the gong coaxes the shou he’ll shout things like baby, gege, Lord Lu Xiping all in one go. Minefields and moe are at your own discretion. Thank you for reading.

[Older gong. The gong is two months older than the shou. Calling the shou “gege” is purely verbal fun and flirting.]

The author is an international student, but this story is a modern alternate setting. No need to fact-check. There will be some differences from reality =3=

PS: Heather actually doesn’t smell very good. The original version used musk, but it got red-locked, so after much painful reflection (not really), it was changed to heather scent.

T/N: I know the other book isn’t completed but couldn’t help myself. This was too interesting and I happen to be free these days~