MDQ Ch 47
by Lulu“Kimoon oppa?”
It was a young woman’s voice, one I rarely heard in Omyeon-ri.
When I turned my head toward the sound, a pretty woman who looked to be in her twenties was walking toward Kang Kimoon.
Before Kang Kimoon could answer, the woman expressed all kinds of delight toward him.
She asked when he had come down to Omyeon-ri, how long he would stay here, how glad she was that he came to the countryside…
I just stood there, listening to the conversation like an idiot. Somehow, I looked dazed.
Unlike the cheerful woman, Kang Kimoon replied tersely, as if annoyed. Even so, the woman blushed, perhaps because she liked even that.
The woman’s peachy, flushed cheeks looked adorable. I knew the meaning behind that face.
That was the face of someone in love.
It resembled my own face back in the days when I would unconsciously blush at seeing Jung Yohan’s smile.
‘Kimoon… must be really popular.’
It was a realization that hit me anew.
Sometimes, Kang Kimoon was a man who could make even someone of the same gender, like me, stare blankly. Surely, he must look impressive to everyone else, too.
At that moment, Kang Kimoon gently grabbed my wrist, which had been standing there foolishly, unable to join the conversation.
He practically cut off the conversation unilaterally, then said he had to go and led me along.
When I stopped while being aimlessly pulled by him, we were in front of a familiar entrance.
After confirming no one else was around, he held both my shoulders.
“You okay?”
“Huh?”
“You have panic, right? I know it’s hard for you when you face strangers, worrying they might recognize you.”
“Ah…”
“Sorry. I should’ve been more careful.”
Kang Kimoon scrutinized my expression, then let out a short sigh of relief when he saw I seemed okay.
“You don’t look as bad as last time. That’s a relief.”
And indeed, I really was okay.
I used to break out in cold sweat and my vision would blur when facing someone who might know Given, but none of that happened at the moment.
It wasn’t that my panic had gone away overnight.
I simply wasn’t thinking about Given because I was focused on the conversation between Kang Kimoon and the woman. Since I didn’t think of Given, my panic didn’t appear.
It felt… strange.
I realized we had grown noticeably closer, yet I also realized I was paying much more attention to him than I had thought.
“Answer me. You really are okay, right?”
Only then did I nod.
“Yeah. I’m okay. You don’t need to worry.”
“I was worried you’d struggle like when you were alone in the rain.”
“So you noticed I’m afraid of facing people…”
“I do.”
“…”
“Of course, that doesn’t mean I want to blame you for running away before. Everyone has things they want to avoid. You don’t have to face everything.”
“You…”
How could someone understand me so well in so few days? I couldn’t express my true feelings, so I just replied briefly, “Thank you.”
Kang Kimoon habitually patted my head and said, “It’s hot. Let’s go inside.”
Once inside, I washed my whole body, soaked in sweat.
After changing into the clothes the ladies had brought me before, I came out to the living room where Kang Kimoon called me, “Come over here if you’re done.”
I approached the sofa where Kang Kimoon was sitting, and he handed me an ice cream.
“Ice cream tastes best after a shower.”
“Thanks.”
“How’s your condition? You’re not suddenly feeling sick, right?”
“Totally fine. You don’t have to worry that much.”
I felt so okay that I even wondered if my panic disorder had improved a little.
Hoping that would be the case, I tore open the ice cream wrapper.
The cold touch hit my tongue.
Even though I’d eaten ice cream countless times before, it tasted sweeter today. It was as if Kang Kimoon’s words were true that ice cream was especially delicious after a shower.
I glanced at Kang Kimoon, who had offered it to me. Sitting close, he seemed lost in thought, staring at something in the distance.
At that moment, the ice cream began to melt slightly, dripping down his fingers.
Seeing that, memories of the old day suddenly came back.
I remembered sharing ice cream in front of the convenience store with Jung Yohan. That day, when I thought we had grown a little closer.
Back then, I hadn’t anticipated that we would completely drift apart in the future. I had simply wished to stay with Yohan as we were.
Now, that day felt like a distant dream.
I didn’t feel sad that such a day would never come again.
They say distance makes the heart grow distant, too. Had the feelings I had long held for Jung Yohan softened? I hoped that was the case.
When I thought this, Kang Kimoon met my eyes. He looked at me the way I had stared at him before.
“I have a question.”
I nodded willingly.
“I did say you don’t have to face everything… but about the thing you said was unfair—are you planning to let it end like this?”
“…”
The thing I had said was unfair—
It must be about becoming a plagiarizing lyricist.
“Because of that, I also found out that when you left the company, CEO Yoon Kangcheol tried to impose a huge penalty on you. Of course, I didn’t investigate behind your back. I just naturally found out while hearing about the plagiarism case.”
“Yeah, I don’t misunderstand.”
“This may be presumptuous, but I hope you fight it. It’d be such a waste otherwise.”
“What do you mean by ‘waste’?”
“Everything you’ve built up until now. And… your lyricist name.”
Kang Kimoon seemed to have already caught on to the meaning of my lyricist name, “118.”
Of course—he knew my older brother well and liked him too, so it would be strange if he didn’t know the significance.
118—more precisely, November 8th—was my brother’s death anniversary.
I named my lyricist persona after that date to honor him.
Honestly, I couldn’t think of another name. I had to use that date. Other words held no value for me.
It was a name of immense, unspoken meaning.
But because of the hardship, I had almost abandoned that name, almost abandoned my brother.
Now, I regretted it. If I were going to give up so easily, I shouldn’t have used it in the first place.
“You didn’t use your brother’s death anniversary to give it up so easily, right?”
Kang Kimoon directly said something that stung.
“I felt like I couldn’t live without giving it up. It was too hard.”
“And now?”
“Now… thanks to you, I feel like I have the courage to live without giving it up.”
“I hope you never let go of what’s meaningful.”
“Yeah.”
My short answer carried firm resolve. I would never abandon my brother’s death anniversary again.
“I couldn’t go to Hyunwoo’s funeral. I only found out he had died a little later.”
“I know. I don’t remember seeing anyone like you at my brother’s funeral.”
“Maybe because I couldn’t see Hyunwoo off? When I learned about his death later, it never left my mind.”
“…”
“Such a shame. If I had gone back then, I might have met you a little earlier.”
If we had known each other then, what would I have been like now?
“If I had known you earlier, I would have seen the lyrics you wrote sooner too.”
“You’ve seen all the lyrics I wrote?”
“Yeah. I’ve been keeping an eye on all your work.”
His words were somehow ambiguous. It gave the impression he had been watching me for a long time, not just because of the plagiarism case.
‘No way. How could he have known me?’
Thinking I must be mistaken, I answered his question.
“It might sound stupid, but I was originally going to let it slide. I even planned to pay the penalty myself.”
“You are indeed a fool.”
But his voice held no hint of mockery, so it didn’t feel bad.
Rather, he seemed to pity me for standing there foolishly.
“But after telling you everything, I realized I couldn’t just leave it like this.”
“Why?”
“I hate even a little misunderstanding from you.”
“Me?”
“You’re someone closely connected to my brother. Your disappointment feels like my brother being disappointed in me.”
Kang Kimoon slightly twisted his lips, as if unsatisfied with my answer. I continued without asking why, “And as you already know… I’m your…”
Saying I’m his fan suddenly felt embarrassing. But I had told him that without hesitation, not long after we met.
“I’m your fan…”
I barely finished and let out a sigh.
Seeing me embarrassed, Kang Kimoon let out a small laugh.
“You’re not some power-tripping manager, right?”
“What’s power-tripping? I’ve never done that.”
“If you had really been abusive, you’d be a really skilled actor.”
“If I had that talent, I’d have become an actor already.”
I shrugged in protest.
“Hyunseok, so how are you going to prove your innocence?”