PSY CH 140

“Oppa.”

“…”

“Oppa!”

A pale hand waved back and forth in front of his eyes. When Jooyoung finally snapped out of it and made eye contact, Arin asked with a concerned expression. “Are you really okay? Your eyes are all swollen. Maybe we should’ve met another day.”

Jooyoung shook his head and smoothly changed the subject.

“You said you’re leaving today. Thanks, I’ll enjoy this.”

Arin rubbed her nose awkwardly and gave a light tap to the apple juice she’d said her boyfriend gave her.

“I swear, he’s such an old man. Even if I tell him you don’t drink this kind of stuff, he won’t listen.”

“No, I like apple juice.”

“If it doesn’t suit your taste, give it to Hwang Dohyun or Jung Hangyeol. They’re country bumpkins, they’ll probably drink it.”

Hearing Dohyun’s name unexpectedly made Jooyoung’s body stiffen. He forced himself to suppress any reaction so Arin wouldn’t notice.

“How’s the pawnshop? I heard there was a fire on the 5th floor.”

“There wasn’t a fire, just some smoke.”

Arin nodded and muttered under her breath.

“I guess it’s true he’s been totally out of it…” 

“Huh?”

“Hwang Dohyun.”

She said there’s no one else in town with a face like his, so stories about him float around even if you don’t seek them out, and emphasized that she wasn’t the one who got interested in the gossip first.

“There’s a lot of talk since the arcade closed down too.” 

Jooyoung had already heard some rumors after the adult arcade shut down.

“Yonghyun lives in the lodging house downstairs, right? And stuff keeps disappearing… that manager…” 

He hadn’t caught the full story that day, but the end of that sentence lingered now. It seemed stranger rumors than he thought were spreading.

“It’s a small neighborhood, after all. So when something comes up, everyone gets excited and starts talking.”

After adding that things would quiet down again once something else happened, Arin swung her legs casually as if it were no big deal. Each time, the blanket draped over her legs fluttered. The weather was a bit too chilly to be sitting out on the terrace, but the heater air inside felt too stifling to stay in.

“…”

Jooyoung silently stared at the black ashtray in the center of the table. He thought he could smell the faint scent of Dohyun’s cigarettes brushing past his nose. Feeling his mood sink, he redirected his attention to Arin.

“So, you’re not coming back to Maeyang anymore?”

“…I have to. I can’t just leave things completely unattended.”

Arin gazed quietly at the far end of the street, then turned to Jooyoung.

“And you? How long are you staying here?”

It wasn’t just Sungwoon. Everyone assumed Jooyoung would leave Maeyang eventually. He now understood that it was because of the way he’d acted.

“As long as I can.”

The unexpected reply made Arin look surprised.

“What? Are you getting attached to this place?”

She leaned back and looked him over from head to toe. Jooyoung gave a faint smile.

“Oh wow, you really got attached.”

Arin shook her head. She clicked her tongue, saying that the scariest thing in the world was attachment—and of all things, that’s what he had developed.

“Oh, I got a call. Oppa, I’m heading off.”

Arin took the call and carried the blanket back inside the café. Jooyoung stood up too, cleaning up the chairs. Two middle-aged women climbed the stairs. One of them looked familiar.

“Lee Jung… Sook. Is that correct?”

She was the woman who had hidden a dark bruise beneath her sleeve, left her bracelet with a face that looked on the verge of tears, and seemed so awkward when writing her name.

She didn’t seem to notice Jooyoung and walked into the café with her companion, smiling. Arin emerged at that moment, brushing shoulders with them.

“Wow, I almost didn’t recognize her.”

Arin looked back at the woman and spoke.

“I heard that she was getting a divorce, and now her face is glowing.”

The face that had been lethargic and worn from years of domestic abuse was gone. Her hunched shoulders stood tall now, her complexion no longer gloomy. If they’d met on the street, Jooyoung wouldn’t have recognized her. The relaxed smile on her lips made her look like a completely different person.

“Apparently, her kids were the happiest when she said she was getting a divorce.”

“…”

“She said she’s moving soon. Well, that’s a good thing, right?”

Arin shrugged and skipped down the stairs. Jooyoung, who had been watching the woman through the glass, followed her down.

After walking a little, they saw a car parked with its hazard lights flashing. Arin, chatting excitedly, broke into a bright smile at the sight and turned to Jooyoung.

“Oppa, that’s my ride! I’m off!”

“Yeah, take care.”

But after a few steps, Arin suddenly stopped. After a pause, she spun around and came back to Jooyoung. The whites of her eyes, streaked with red veins, shimmered with tears, and her lips, pressed tightly against her upper teeth, were drained of all color. Surprisingly, Arin was holding back tears.

“Five hundred thousand won might not be much to you, but… it was a really, really big deal to me.”

Her voice trembled as she looked up. She inhaled sharply. Her lips quivered as she exhaled.

“It was… really, really huge amount.”

At that time, when she’d been pushed around from all sides, that money had meant more than just the amount. Among people who treated her misfortune as normal, Jooyoung had been the only one to reach out. Arin hadn’t needed grand gestures—she’d just needed a bit of help.

“Ugh, this is so embarrassing.”

After saying it, Arin looked a bit embarrassed and made a sulky face. She rubbed away the tears welling up in her eyes with her arm.

Jooyoung didn’t say anything. His help hadn’t been out of kindness—it was for a selfish reason, just to ease his own discomfort. But Arin said it meant the world to her.

Arin sniffled loudly and gave a big smile.

“I’m really going now.”

Arin turned around and ran toward the car. Her steps were brisk and light, free from any trace of worry or hesitation.

Jooyoung felt a twinge of envy toward someone who could run toward their destination without hesitation. 

***

He picked up his phone and put it down again, over and over, dozens of times. After a long while, he ended up doing nothing at all, just shoving it back into his pocket with a weak motion.

Jooyoung turned his gaze to the shopping bag in his hand. Inside was Dohyun’s work jacket. Even he thought the excuse of returning it just to get in touch was pathetic. More than anything, using this kind of pretense felt like an insult to Dohyun.

But still…

Even if it had to be this way, he wanted to see Dohyun. He wanted to explain about Sungwoon showing up. He wanted to give him a heads-up about the rumors. Even if all he got in return was that same indifferent gaze from the other day.

“…”

Jooyoung took a deep breath and started walking toward the stairs. According to what Hangyeol told him earlier, Dohyun was at the PC café right now. Ever since the adult arcade shut down, it had become harder to see him—there was no place Jooyoung could just drop by like before.

The PC café was on the second floor. As Jooyoung reached the landing, noise erupted from below. It wasn’t unusual since middle and high school students often hung around outside the PC café.

But it wasn’t middle or high school students who greeted Jooyoung. The ones pouring out of the PC café in a loud group were Dohyun’s friends. And among them was Dohyun himself.

“Uh?”

Someone spotted Jooyoung and widened his eyes. Jooyoung remembered Hangyeol sometimes calling him “Gae Junwoo.” One by one, they all turned to look at Jooyoung. Dohyun glanced his way too—but quickly looked away. He was also the first to start walking again. The rest followed his lead and headed toward the stairs in a noisy cluster.

“Dohyun-ah.”

But the moment Jooyoung called his name, tension snapped tight around them like a rubber band being stretched too far. Everyone stopped walking and looked up at Jooyoung.

He came down the stairs toward Dohyun.

“Here.”

He held out the shopping bag. His heart was pounding like it would leap out of his mouth, but he didn’t show it. He didn’t want this to look like a cheap excuse. That’s why he hadn’t said anything else. 

Dohyun’s gaze landed on the bag. But only for a second.

“Throw it away.”

He turned around immediately and kept going down the stairs. Without thinking, Jooyoung followed and grabbed his arm.

“Take…it.”

His mouth was dry from nerves. He tightened his grip to keep his hands from shaking.

Dohyun, standing two steps below, looked down at the bag with a hard-to-read expression. Jooyoung thought maybe he’d brush his hand away like before, like he was dusting something off.

“…”

Dohyun slowly looked up at him. Then, raising the arm Jooyoung wasn’t holding, he extended his large, calloused hand.

Jooyoung stared at it blankly for a second before realizing—he was asking for the bag. Flustered, he quickly handed it over.

“Ah, here.”

Dohyun took it without a word, like it was nothing.

“Dohyun…!”

Jooyoung opened his mouth, thinking this might be his chance, but he stopped. The moment he took the bag, Dohyun immediately turned around. He didn’t say anything more. It was like even exchanging words was a hassle. That was it. He took the bag, and it was over.

Jooyoung’s face flushed hot. 

He felt like Dohyun had seen right through his cowardly little plan—to sneak in a few words under the excuse of returning something. And Dohyun, knowing this, gave him nothing to work with. Not even the chance to start a conversation.

“…”

Now, he wasn’t sure which felt emptier—his hands or his heart.

“What the… is that haem^[1] close with Hwangdo?”

“No idea.”

The group that had been a bit further off now followed Dohyun down the stairs. As they brushed past Jooyoung, they kept sneaking glances at him. Their barely concealed curiosity was blatant.

“What was that tone? ‘Dohyun-ah~’?” 

“Ah, fuck. Don’t do that. It’s gross.”

Someone poorly mocked Jooyoung’s Seoul accent, and a few others burst into laughter. Laced with crude jokes and swearing, the noise gradually faded into the distance.

Only Jooyoung remained rooted where he was, long after they had gone.