SFO CH 3

The Young Man is Going to Stop Trying

First of all, I decided to stop the pointless chatter that I’d been engaging in up until now.

I’d still greet him as basic courtesy, but I would stop trying to make conversation with the only purpose of easing the atmosphere.

“Good morning.”

“Good morning.”

“…”

“…”

The only sound that echoes through the large dining room is the faint noise of us eating.

I simply savor the freshly baked bread that the head chef always prepares to suit my tastes. Back at my parents’ house, where we were always struggling due to flooding, it wasn’t that we were starving, but we certainly weren’t eating bread of this quality every morning. I’m grateful to the very competent former marquess and my husband.

I could feel the confusion among the servants brought by my sudden silence. Of course, being professionals, they didn’t show it on their faces at all. However, the words ‘Is he unwell? Should I call for a doctor?’ were scribbled all over the butler’s face. I also noticed the head maid discreetly instructing someone to prepare a warm drink for my room.

I’m sorry, everyone. I’m tired, but I’m fine—there’s nothing out of the ordinary with my health.

After finishing the meal, I let my husband know that I was leaving and returned to my room. When I saw the sweetened herbal tea that’s often served when I’m feeling under the weather, I gratefully took a sip. Just then, I heard a gentle knock. It was the butler.

“Madam, it’s Sebas. I realize you must be busy, but may I have a moment?”

“I’m just having tea, so it’s fine. Come in.”

As usual, Sebas entered the room with the flawless mannerisms befitting a butler in a noble household. However, after three years, I could tell he was a little anxious.

“Madam, forgive my presumption, but you don’t seem to be feeling well. I’ll arrange for a doctor immediately, and I suggest you take the day off. You’ve been pushing yourself too hard.”I’m sorry, Sebas. I didn’t mean to worry you. It’s true that I’m tired, but it’s nothing unusual, and I’m fine.”

Sebas didn’t seem convinced. He likely genuinely cares about my well-being. As a seasoned butler who will turn 50 this year, he’s been careful not to overwhelm me with the responsibilities of a marchioness, and he always makes sure I take some rest. He was also the first to open his heart to me when I arrived as the marquis’ wife, and he’s like a second father in this household.

“Still, you seemed a little unlike yourself during breakfast…”

“Listen, Sebas… I’ve decided to stop making unnecessary efforts with my husband.”

Sebas seemed a little taken aback by this.

“…I see. That’s understandable, I suppose.”

“Sebas…”

“However, madam, there’s no denying you look pale. I truly believe you need rest today.”

“I have work today, but tomorrow is my day off. I’ll rest all day then, maybe even sleep until the evening. Would that be alright…?”

“Of course, madam! You work far too hard, and you’ve never properly rested because you’re always so considerate of your husband. The head maid always says she’d tie you to the bed if it meant you’d take a break! I may not know much about how much work you have to do today, but if you can end early today, I’d recommend doing so. You really do seem exhausted.”

Sebas’ words almost brought me to tears. He’s the one who had once begged me not to give up on my husband. Although I’m sure he has his own thoughts, I know that, deep inside, he’s furious at how my husband behaves. To be honest, I was most afraid of how Sebas would react to my decision to stop trying. But it turns out he wasn’t angry or disappointed, so that’s a relief.

Normally, he’s very strict about maintaining his professional role, so the fact that he’s pushing me this far shows just how genuinely concerned he is for me.

I smiled warmly at him, thanked him, and began preparing for work.

As I got ready, Mia, my personal maid, who had come in to assist me, also expressed concern.

“Madam, I think you’ve endured more than enough, and frankly, I hope your husband realizes that.”

“Mia, you’ll get in trouble if anyone hears you saying those kinds of things.”

“It’s fine. I’m only worried about your health. Recently, those dark circles under your eyes haven’t gone away, and even with the dry season, your skin and hair are starting to show just how tired you are. The fact that you need to use a special face pack just to get by is proof you’re not getting enough rest. Please, take a break, I’m begging you.”

Mia, who is three years older than me and like an older sister figure, is the prized apprentice of the head maid, who’s devoted to her work. Even though she’s past the typical marriage age, she’s a high-profile woman who is immensely popular with the male servants. Her top two suitors are Tommy (24), the assistant butler, and Adam (28), a rising star in the kitchen trusted by the head chef. Capable women are very popular among younger men.

I thanked Mia and headed to the royal palace.

After greeting my colleagues and starting my work, Noah, my husband’s former lover, came by to deliver some documents. He recently got married to the librarian and had just returned from maternity leave after giving birth to their first child.

Noah –who became a civil servant– and I have occasional work-related interactions, and so we’ve grown familiar with each other. At first, there was some awkwardness, but seeing his earnest efforts and his repeated apologies for the trouble he’d caused me made me realize he wasn’t a bad person. Over time, I started seeing him more like a younger brother.

Since I don’t particularly harbor any romantic feelings for my husband, I invited him to dinner one night and, under the influence of alcohol, he shared everything about their past. Watching her tear up while recalling the painful memories made me feel a bit guilty. However, seeing the genuine happiness on his face as he talked about his life with his husband, the librarian, made me feel that it all had been for the best in the end.

I think my husband’s love was too intense for Noah to handle. With his current peaceful relationship, he can love his husband more actively, which makes him seem more vibrant and full of life. When I shared my own stories about my time with the student council president, he tearfully stood up and said, ‘I think we’d get along so well! Please be my friend!’ as he held my hand. Since then, we’ve become drinking buddies.

“Good morning, I’ve brought the documents due today…

…Fi-Finn-sama! You look terrible!”

“Good morning, Noah. Isn’t it always like this? I’m just a little tired, that’s all.”

“No! Even Sebas and the others must have told you to rest after seeing your face! You must absolutely leave early today!”

Noah, on the verge of tears, gathered the attention of our colleagues. In the end, the assistant to the chancellor himself instructed me to go home early.

“You’re taking care of other people’s work even though you’ve already finished yours. It’s very helpful that you’re so considerate, but you need to rest as well sometimes.”

And with that, I was practically pushed into a carriage and forcibly sent home before noon.

As soon as I got back, and almost as if they had been waiting for this moment, Sebas, Mia, and the head maid immediately got me changed into loungewear, tucked me into bed, and brought me a light, easily digestible lunch.“I’ve always thought madam pushes herself too hard!!”

The head maid, Edna, is a plump, motherly figure to everyone but also sharp as a tack, admired and feared alike by the staff. At 45, she has three daughters who are already grown and making names for themselves in the houses of other distinguished nobles.

She had always been close to Noah, and when I first married into this family, it was clear that she kept a certain distance from me. However, as I learned the ropes of managing the household, and as she saw how much I constantly tiptoed around my husband, she gradually became the most supportive person in this house. The herbal tea this morning was something she always prepares for me quietly whenever she notices I’m feeling down, especially when it involves my husband. I’ve lost count of how many times her thoughtfulness has comforted me.

“There’s no one left in this household who doesn’t stand by your side, madam, so you can relax a little more. You worry too much about the marquis. We’ll take care of the household, so you should ease up on yourself. Even the previous marchioness didn’t do this much.”

When Edna said that, I couldn’t hold back my tears.

“There, there, dear. You’ve really done so well to keep going. Take today and tomorrow to rest as much as you like. I’ve already told the head chef to prepare your favorite dishes for dinner, so look forward to it when you wake up.”

“Thank you, Edna…”

She gently stroked my back, and I couldn’t find the words through my tears. I had sensed that the servants’ attitudes had softened toward me, but this was the first time I’d been directly acknowledged like this. It felt like all my efforts had been finally rewarded, and so I couldn’t stop crying.

That day, I slept soundly until dinner, which they brought to my room. After a nice bath and a relaxing massage from Mia, I slept like a log once again. Even after the sun had risen high, everyone let me sleep in, and when I finally woke up, it was already tea time. It was the first real rest I had gotten since I married, and Mia was thrilled to see that the dark circles under my eyes had lightened up a little

Later that evening, I had dinner with my husband, but the silence didn’t bother me at all.