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    20. The Left Eye

    When did I fall asleep?

    I had simply closed my eyes and opened them, and now it was morning.

    I must have passed out because I was exhausted, from being suspected by Kiss, from checking on Samdu who barked at me, from wondering whom I could trust, from everything all at once.

    And maybe I had fallen asleep the moment I collapsed face-down, because my body was completely stiff. I grumbled that it felt like rigor mortis and slowly stretched my rigid limbs.

    “Uuugh.”

    A groan escaped me. After loosening my stiff body with some whining and twisting, I looked at the watch on my left wrist.

    9:54 a.m.

    I’d slept about six hours.

    It had been a long time since I slept this much in one go.

    Not the fragmented naps I’d been taking, but a solid stretch of sleep, how long had it been?

    Thanks to that, my body felt lighter. And since I had spent so many days tense and unable to properly rest, my mind often felt foggy, but today it didn’t.

    Feeling refreshed in body and mind, I jumped off the bed.

    Today was a travel day, and since it was nearly ten o’clock, I assumed the ringmaster was already traveling alone.

    So this was the inside of the moving lodging.

    I’d always wondered what the shrunk circus tent or container building looked like during movement.

    I looked around quickly, but the windowless guest room revealed no difference at all.

    I wanted to see the scenery outside.

    How would the view look when the entire building shrank and moved? Completely dark? Only the inside of a basket?

    As far as I knew, the ringmaster’s first floor had no windows. So I opened the door to head straight to the office.

    Fixing my eyes on the office door, I walked straight ahead and grabbed the doorknob without hesitation, swinging it open.

    “…!”

    And immediately regretted it.

    Because there, by the sunlit window, stood the ringmaster, looking outside.

    He hadn’t left yet?

    He definitely heard the door burst open, but he didn’t move at all. I hurriedly rubbed my eyes and wiped my mouth with the back of my hand.

    Please tell me I didn’t drool.

    I even patted down my hair several times before clearing my throat and bowing my head.

    “Good morning.”

    “……”

    But even after I straightened up, no answer came for a long time. Not even a glance from him. So I tried again.

    “Did you sleep well?”

    This time, he cast me a brief sideways glance before turning back to the window.

    “…?”

    Puzzled, I called out to him.

    “Sir?”

    “……”

    Still no answer.

    He definitely heard me… so was he ignoring me? But why? Last night he told me to rest well, and now suddenly this?

    “Sir?!”

    When I called him again, I saw his brow tighten. His uncovered right eye narrowed, the expression clearly sour.

    Something must have happened overnight, so I shifted my question.

    “Did you have a nightmare or something?”

    “That’s not it.”

    He finally replied, rubbing the corner of his eye with a touch of irritation.

    “I just have a lot on my mind.”

    Then he finally looked at me.

    The moment our eyes met, my heart dropped without reason. For some reason, he looked softer than usual.

    As if the man who ignored me a moment ago had been an illusion, he stared straight at me with calm, gentle eyes.

    “I told you to rest well. Why didn’t you sleep longer?”

    His tone sounded like scolding, but the content was strangely caring.

    Caught between the two, I couldn’t respond and only darted my eyes around.

    “Why?”

    “Umm… no reason. Should I… go back in?”

    At my words, he looked at me with a deep, steady gaze, as if thinking something over.

    That steady gaze pressed on me, making me avoid his eyes without meaning to.

    At the same moment, his voice came.

    “Since you’re already up, let’s travel together.”

    “So we haven’t left yet?”

    He nodded, answering without hesitation.

    “Yes.”

    “You’re leaving late today.”

    While I questioned him without meeting his eyes, he had already moved quietly to stand near me.

    I was so startled when his figure suddenly appeared within my field of vision, my heart nearly leapt out.

    “Assistant.”

    “Y-yes?”

    “The trip today is longer than usual.”

    “How long?”

    Normally it took two or three hours. I wondered how long it had to be for him to give me advance warning.

    “Six hours.”

    My heart dropped again.

    I’d have to walk six hours holding the reins under the summer sun.

    At least the snacks he gave me were something to look forward to. But with six hours, I’d probably need at least two snacks.

    “So eat before we go.”

    Still grumbling in my head, I said yes and headed to the dining room.

    At least he was feeding me before making me work.

    That was something.

    But then I noticed the ringmaster following behind me.

    It was such an unfamiliar sight that I kept turning around every few steps. Every time I did, he met my eyes with an unchanged expression.

    “Um… are you eating with me?”

    We always ate separately, so I asked. Immediately after, I let out a weak laugh.

    Why didn’t I realize?

    The ringmaster eats. That means he has a real body, not a fake one.

    Even though I already knew that much, I had still been surprised yesterday to learn he wasn’t a soul from Hell.

    Maybe the puzzle pieces were too scattered to form a full picture until I faced it directly.

    If Kiss is the same as the ringmaster, he must also be sneaking food from somewhere.

    The ringmaster didn’t answer. He simply entered the kitchen and returned with some fruit and vegetables from the fridge.

    “Are you vegetarian?”

    “No. Omnivore.”

    “Me too. But I like meat more.”

    I said it on purpose since I hadn’t had meat at all since coming here.

    “Then eat.”

    “There isn’t any.”

    “Why not? There’s plenty in the meat aging storage over there.”

    “Sorry?”

    There was meat?

    I jumped to my feet and opened the door he pointed toward with a jerk of his chin. It was a storage room tucked into a corner I always assumed was just for decoration. Inside were piles of different cuts of meat.

    “Can I eat this?”

    A bright smile spread across my face on its own. The ringmaster watched me quietly, stabbing a piece of watermelon with a fork and nodding as he ate it.

    “Do you want some too?”

    He hesitated for a moment, then nodded again.

    “But I can’t tell which meat is which. Could you tell me? There are too many kinds.”

    Shameless as it was, I was powerless in front of meat. I ended up dragging the ringmaster up from his seat, where he had already started eating, and picked beef loin from the cuts he pointed out before hurrying to the frying pan.

    “Don’t add pepper.”

    I thought beef was supposed to be seasoned with pepper and salt.

    But since the owner of the meat didn’t want it, I left it out and focused on heating the pan. The smell of meat filled the air for the first time in a long while, and I watched it cook with full concentration.

    “If only we had red wine.”

    “We don’t have anything like that.”

    I muttered it instinctively, recalling something I once saw, red wine with steak, right at that moment the ringmaster’s voice came from behind.

    “We do have whiskey instead of red wine.”

    “Oh, it’s fine. I don’t want to be drinking before walking under the midday sun.”

    After a while, the beef was cooked just right. I lifted the whole piece and placed it in a bowl before setting it on the table.

    “Is there no scissors?”

    “In the office.”

    “No… kitchen scissors.”

    “…? There’s a separate kind of scissors for the kitchen?”

    Looking baffled, the ringmaster took a knife instead and began cutting the large chunk into bite-sized pieces.

    “I’ll do it.”

    “It’s fine. Just eat.”

    “No, but…”

    “You wanted meat. Eat it.”

    In that moment, a halo seemed to shine behind his head.

    Aside from family, no one had ever cut meat for me and told me to eat.

    “Sir, are you an angel?”

    At my comment, he froze with the knife mid-air.

    I guessed it made sense, being called an angel in Hell of all places, so I just laughed it off and picked up my fork.

    “It’s just a saying. People who feed you are good people.”

    Even if he wasn’t a person.

    Anyway, trying to excuse my words, I picked up a piece of beef and tasted it. I hadn’t grilled beef much before, but since I often cooked pork, I managed to cook it perfectly to my taste.

    “This is so good!”

    This was honestly the happiest moment I’d had since coming to the circus.

    At the same time, I regretted all the days I’d eaten nothing but greens without realizing this was available the whole time.

    “You should try some too, sir. Hurry.”

    Watching me shovel meat into my mouth with teary gratitude, he muttered,

    “You like eating more than I thought.”

    I could guess the image of me forming inside the ringmaster’s head, but since that made him feed me well, I didn’t mind.

    Let him think whatever he wants, while I kept eating, I noticed he hadn’t touched a single piece, only cutting them. So I offered him some.

    “Have some. It’s too much for me alone.”

    He looked at the meat I held out, then turned his head away.

    “I don’t use the same utensils as others.”

    “Really?”

    So I used the fork I had brought for him and held out a piece again.

    “Now it’s fine, right?”

    Since both his hands were busy, I thought this would help, but the ringmaster stared at the meat with a look more determined than a knight heading to battle.

    It was so funny I stopped eating just to watch him.

    “This is yours, sir. The meat and the fork both.”

    At my words, his gaze moved from the meat to the fork, and from the fork to me.

    “No.”

    He denied it.

    “It’s not mine.”

    Then he put down the now-useless knife and took the fork from my hand instead.

    “Nothing here belongs to me.”

    After saying that, he took the meat in one bite and swallowed it.

    Pulling back my now-empty hand, I responded to his comment about owning nothing.

    “Me neither.”

    I didn’t mean anything deep by it, just casual agreement.

    Knowing this was a Hell circus, it only made sense that nothing here was truly his unless he was the King of the Underworld or something.

    But the ringmaster actually smiled at that.

    The smile looked unexpectedly comfortable, and for a second, I wondered if I was hallucinating from the joy of eating meat again.

    “Why…?”

    “Nothing.”

    Then he quietly continued eating.

    After the meal, he told me to get ready while he cleaned up. As I walked to the bathroom, I kept glancing back at him.

    What’s with him today?

    He felt kinder… yet harder to approach.

    After hurriedly washing up and running out of the bathroom, I saw the office door open. Beyond it was the ringmaster, checking his outfit in the mirror.

    Why bother? There was no one here who cared. Still, I stood next to him and checked the mirror too.

    I only washed my face since I’d sweat during the walk anyway, so I just shook out my damp bangs and combed them lightly.

    “?”

    Then I noticed through the mirror that the ringmaster was staring directly at me. I was about to ask why but instead just gave a small grin.

    “I’m all ready.”

    The ringmaster lowered his gaze slightly, touched his eyepatch for a moment, then nodded and stepped out of the office first. His pace was faster than usual, so I hurried to catch up just as he was enchanting the white carousel horse.

    The horse always looked large and intimidating no matter how often I saw it.

    Soon after, he shrank the circus tent and container building. And since I had done this a few times already, I was used to opening the baskets on either side of the horse and loading everything inside, until something made me call out urgently.

    “Sir!”

    The ringmaster, who had been reaching toward the surrounding fixtures, turned to look at me. Maybe it was the magic, but his hair was rippling like waves.

    “Can I go check on Samdu for a moment?”

    His wave-like hair settled, and realizing that was his permission, I immediately headed into the shack.

    “Samdu.”

    Inside the shack, which stayed at a constant brightness day or night, Samdu welcomed me.

    Yesterday he snarled, barked, whined, an absolute mess, but today he looked in good condition. Beside him was the food bowl I hadn’t had the mind to clean yesterday. There was still some food left inside, so I refilled his dish with it.

    “Yellow’s sleeping.”

    I let out a small sigh as I looked at Yellow’s head, it must have been his usual nap time because his eyes were closed. Yesterday, all three of them looked exhausted, but Yellow looked especially drained.

    Maybe I was imagining it, but still.

    Even if one head felt better or worse, it was all the same body… technically. But judging by how each head acted toward me, maybe it really was different. Well, of course, it would be. If one head had a headache or toothache, it wouldn’t be the same for the others.

    “Then rest well. I’m going.”

    Red gave a small whine as if understanding, and Blue, who’d been sticking out his tongue, lifted his eyes toward me with a soft expression. And perhaps because their feelings spread, Yellow slowly opened his eyes.

    “You’re awake.”

    Feeling a little guilty for disturbing their nap, I started to leave, but glanced at Yellow one more time. His eyes looked indifferent, no, relieved. I didn’t know the reason, but his quiet gaze stayed on me. Watching him drift back to sleep, I stood up.

    “Get some rest.”

    After muttering softly, I tried my best not to look back as I walked out. I could feel their eyes watching me, and I knew if I turned around, I’d meet Samdu’s gaze and end up going back to the cage.

    Apparently, I cared about Samdu more than I thought.

    Well, truthfully, I always did like dogs.

    More than that, in this strange world full of distrust, having a young creature I needed to take care of gave me surprising strength to endure. Sometimes, when I was scared or exhausted, I even used Samdu as an excuse to escape to the shack.

    No wonder my head was throbbing.

    Kiss… what the hell did he do to Samdu?

    I was getting angry.

    But even so, the fear still lingered.

    Come to think of it… who will take care of Samdu once I leave?

    Right as I sighed, I saw the ringmaster. He was right in front of me the moment he folded the tent, as if he’d been waiting.

    “Please look after Samdu well.”

    He was the one in charge anyway, but I still hoped he’d take good care of him. That way no one would dare hurt him.

    “But sir.”

    I looked at the shrinking shack and asked,

    “Samdu… he’s a Cerberus, right?”

    The ringmaster’s profile, with the eyepatch, moved slightly up and down.

    “Since this is Hell, did you adopt him? Planning to use him as a guard later?”

    The ringmaster handed me the shack and fixtures that had turned into bundles and gave me a sidelong glance.

    “Or did Hell send him to you?”

    As I muttered somewhere between a question and a monologue, he answered from atop the horse.

    “He was abandoned. But since he’s a very rare purebred Cerberus, they sent him to me, saying he was valuable.”

    “Then you’re the mom, right? Or… nanny? No, wait, not mom, nanny, what am I saying?”

    “……”

    “Babysitter?”

    After I finally found the right word in my confusion, the ringmaster looked down at me and said one thing.

    “Take it.”

    “Yes.”

    I quickly understood and grabbed the reins with my left hand, walking in the direction he guided.

    It was time to move.

    How long had we been walking?

    I checked the time. Almost three hours.

    Whether this was a ghost path or an illusion path, one of the scariest things was still the heat.

    The midday sun of July scorched the earth, and there wasn’t even shade. There were forests on both sides, but their trees only provided shadow deeper inside; the road itself stayed in bright pale yellow sunlight.

    “Here, eat.”

    Whenever the walk became tiring, the ringmaster produced some snack from who-knows-where.

    This time too, he tossed something from atop the horse, and I caught it with excitement.

    “Wow, ice cream!”

    At this point, I no longer cared how such things were appearing from him. I was just happy that today’s snack was ice cream as I tore open the wrapper.

    “Do you want some too, sir?”

    “No.”

    He rejected it firmly, then held his hand out toward me.

    “…?”

    I wasn’t sure what he meant, so after a short and intense moment of thought, I placed my hand on his.

    There was nothing else that made sense, he didn’t want ice cream, and the only thing he could want from me was my hand, right?

    But something was off about his expression.

    “Oh.”

    Realizing the reason, I quickly pulled my hand back and gave him the bundle I’d been holding.

    Why did I give him my hand? So embarrassing.

    My ears heated up.

    But the ringmaster stared at the bundle for a long moment before lightly biting his lip and speaking slowly.

    “I meant trash. You can’t throw it on the road.”

    …So that’s what he meant?

    Feeling awkward, I took the bundle back and handed him the ice cream wrapper instead. He crushed it in his fist and tucked it into his pocket.

    “But I don’t throw trash on the ground. Don’t worry. That strawberry rice-cake thing you gave me last time? I put the paper wrapper in my pocket.”

    “……”

    The ringmaster didn’t answer my rambling, probably caused by embarrassment. He only chewed on his lower lip, so I watched his mouth instead.

    If he bit that hard, it must hurt.

    See? His lip was turning red. His lower lip had turned completely crimson. Even that color suited him… maybe because he was so good-looking.

    It looked like it might bleed. Should I tell him to stop?

    Now that I noticed, his canines were pretty sharp. Why were they so pointy?

    “Ah, oh.”

    Then, feeling something drip, I quickly turned my gaze away. While staring at his lips, my vanilla ice cream had melted and run over my fingers. I hurried to lick it off several times.

    Finally, with my head tilted sideways, I lifted the ice cream upright with my lips and swept upward.

    One clean swipe stopped it from dripping, but that was only temporary.

    It was melting fast from the heat.

    If I had any magical power, the first thing I’d do would be preventing this ice cream from melting.

    So in the end, I stuffed the rest deep into my mouth and bit down.

    A low groan sounded beside me.

    I glanced over and saw the ringmaster grimacing.

    “Are you hurt?”

    I looked at his lips to see if he was bleeding, but he turned his head away.

    Since this wasn’t the first time I’d eaten something too fast, I quickly devoured the rest of the ice cream in a few bites. And somehow, without even looking, the ringmaster extended his hand again.

    This time, I understood and placed the stick into his hand politely, handle-first.

    “Is it that hot?”

    As he took care of the stick, the ringmaster asked. He probably assumed I devoured the ice cream so quickly because of the heat.

    “Of course it’s hot. It’s hard to even walk.”

    I exaggerated my complaint and fanned myself with my hand on purpose.

    He frowned.

    What is he thinking about?

    At first, the ringmaster’s frowning face only looked scary and threatening, but now I could see the subtle emotions in it. His expression now carried a hint of worry or contemplation.

    Because we spent much more time together during the day, when the other members were asleep, I’d come to recognize these things.

    “Do you know how to ride a horse?”

    I snapped my head up.

    “A horse?”

    Was he going to let me ride one?

    Of course I wanted to ride. But as a beginner, horseback riding could easily get me injured.

    “Uh… I can ride a wooden horse.”

    “Wooden horse?”

    He questioned me at my vague answer, glancing at his own mount. And only then did I recall that the horse he was riding now had originally been a carousel horse.

    So I hurried to add,

    “I mean, if it’s stiff and not moving, I can sit on it.”

    Suddenly the ringmaster covered his forehead and eyes with his hand.

    “I can’t ride it when it’s alive and moving.”

    “It’s not that you can’t. You just haven’t tried.”

    Then he lowered the hand covering his face and extended it toward me.

    His palm was facing upward, and I wasn’t clueless enough to think he wanted the bundle this time.

    He wanted me to ride with him.

    While I hesitated for a moment, my legs, after three hours of walking under the blazing sun, started shuffling toward him on their own. And I quickly placed my hand on his.

    He pulled me up immediately, lifting me as if picking me off the ground.

    “Ugh!”

    My shoulder!

    But while he was lifting me onto the horse, something went very wrong, and I ended up sitting on the saddle facing him.

    “……”

    “……”

    At that distance, shoulder blades, shoulders, any pain disappeared from shock alone.

    And clearly, the ringmaster was just as startled.

    After a brief silence, the two of us sat awkwardly close, each pulling our upper bodies back as much as space allowed, until the ringmaster finally spoke first.

    “Why did you sit like that?”

    “I… I didn’t have room to turn around.”

    “You should’ve adjusted your position.”

    “I panicked. And I told you, I’ve never ridden a real horse before.”

    “You said you rode a wooden one.”

    “How is that the same as this?”

    Sitting diagonally, squabbling about whose fault it was, it must have gotten ridiculous, because the ringmaster finally grabbed my waist himself, lifted me, and turned me half a circle to face forward.

    It was the first time since grade school that someone had picked me up like that, so it felt a bit embarrassing.

    Why was the saddle so narrow?

    Pressed back against the ringmaster, I scooted forward a little. But the moment I moved, his hand wrapped around my stomach and pulled me back toward him.

    “Where are you going?”

    Where else? I just moved forward because his body was touching mine.

    But saying that felt too self-conscious, so I swallowed it. If he were a friend, I could’ve joked about not wanting to be stuck to him, but this was… different.

    “Sit still. You’ll get hurt if you fall.”

    It was obvious, yet my pride stung a tiny bit. Just a tiny bit.

    “I mean, if I land well, I don’t have to get hurt.”

    “Are you trying to argue with me?”

    The words were sharp, but the voice was soft. Why?

    “That’s not what I meant.”

    After that, both of us went quiet.

    All I heard was the rhythmic clopping of the horse’s hooves. The ringmaster’s hands, holding the reins right beside my arms, were right in my peripheral vision, so I stared harder at the path ahead.

    Aside from the occasional fork, the road was nearly straight, nothing but horizon stretching on.

    “When do we arrive?”

    “About an hour and a half left.”

    Wow, that was far.

    Still, riding was much cooler than walking.

    But comfortable? Not at all.

    The pounding of hooves vibrated through the saddle. The horse’s muscles shifted under the inside of my thighs. My hips bounced up and down uncomfortably. And above all, the ringmaster right behind me was the biggest problem.

    “……”

    I nearly jumped.

    One of the ringmaster’s hands slipped off the rein for a moment and brushed against my thigh.

    “Sorry.”

    He must have felt it too, because he apologized quickly and lifted his hand again.

    But my skin was already oversensitive. It felt like even the air around us was rippling, and his presence seeped into me.

    Weird.

    I wiped sweat from the back of my neck with my palm.

    “Still hot?”

    “Huh? Well… the sun’s still strong.”

    Maybe I should ask to get down.

    The sweat cooling on my neck turned cold. When the ringmaster spoke, his breath brushed the wet skin, making it tickle. The realization made a shiver run through me, my shoulders curling in.

    “What’s wrong?”

    “N-nothing.”

    My reaction must have seemed strange even to him.

    “I think I can walk now. I’m fine.”

    “Just stay.”

    “No, I…”

    “I’m going to run soon. Stay on.”

    “Run?”

    The ringmaster’s body pressed closer to mine. And whatever had been brushing against me before came even nearer.

    A weight I definitely did not want to think about.

    As I ducked my head, I noticed the ringmaster shortening the reins. That meant I was now completely enclosed in his arms, and I leaned forward instinctively.

    “Don’t lean like that.”

    I had been leaning on the horse’s long neck, so I slowly straightened my back.

    “Is it dangerous to ride like that?”

    Maybe grabbing the horse’s neck would help?

    But the ringmaster didn’t answer. Instead, he let go of the reins with his right hand and pulled my stomach back toward him again. Our bodies pressed flush together.

    His hand, which had been across my lower abdomen, slowly moved upward to my chest. Then he pushed gently, forcing me to lean fully against him.

    “H-hey…”

    “This is better.”

    Before I could protest further, his hand moved up to my shoulder, pressing firmly to settle me entirely into his embrace. Then he took the reins again.

    “Stay like this.”

    Then he kicked the horse’s side.

    “W-whaaaa…!”

    My scream started loud but ended small.

    The horse surged forward far faster than I expected.

    Even though the ringmaster told me to lean on him, I had planned to pull away once I got used to it. But with the air ramming into me at that insane speed, leaning forward was impossible.

    “Ab-bu… puu…”

    Like a newborn crying, I fought to breathe against the wind smashing directly into my face.

    The speed felt like those amusement-park rides famous for being fast. No, worse. I swear, it was worse.

    This was horse speed?

    I couldn’t keep my eyes open. The pressure of the wind was too strong, so I ended up leaning completely against the ringmaster, one hand gripping his arm while the other covered my face. Just having something to block the wind made it a little easier to breathe.

    “Huff, ha… huff, ha…”

    It was still impossible to open my eyes against the wind rushing beneath my hand, so I turned my head to the side. That made the wind ease a little.

    It must’ve been because the ringmaster’s body blocked the air from behind.

    Ah…

    Now that I had a moment of ease, my mind finally started working again. I realized I was not only relying completely on his body, but practically burrowing into the spot between his chest and right shoulder, right under his chin.

    But even realizing that, I couldn’t fix my posture.

    It was too fast. I wanted to say something, something like this is dangerous, or I’m going to die, but I couldn’t even get the words out.

    I curled my body tighter and buried my face deeper into him.

    My waist twisted painfully, but breathing mattered more than comfort.

    How long did that continue?

    At some point, I realized I was hugging his left arm.

    “S-sorry…”

    As I stammered an apology, the ringmaster yanked the reins hard.

    Why stop? Is he mad I grabbed the arm holding the reins?

    Startled, I let go of his arm right away, straightened my posture, and scooted forward as if escaping.

    “Haa… haa…”

    The horse had been running, but my breathing was the one out of control. Still dazed, I slowly glanced back, and saw the ringmaster looking at me with his hair slightly disheveled.

    “I’m sorry.”

    I apologized again. He tilted his head slightly.

    “For what?”

    “Your arm… I grabbed the arm holding the reins. It must’ve bothered you.”

    He let out a faint breath through his nose, jumped off the horse, and immediately reached between my arms toward my side to lift me down.

    This time he lowered me more slowly and gently than when he’d hoisted me up.

    God, how embarrassing.

    My knees started to go numb.

    Ignoring the trembling in my legs, I stepped aside a little and asked,

    “How much farther?”

    “We’re here.”

    “What? You said we had an hour and a half left.”

    “We ran.”

    By my sense of time, that was maybe five minutes.

    Pressing my hand against the spot near my heart that was slowly calming down, I turned toward him.

    “So should we unpack here?”

    All that meant was unloading the miniature building and bags from the basket. I walked toward the horse again when the ringmaster called me.

    “Assistant Choi.”

    “Yes?”

    He touched his eyepatch.

    “Choi Yeonho.”

    “…Yes.”

    Hearing my real name from him felt strange every time.

    “Do you still think I like you?”

    I didn’t get it for a moment, but then realized he was referring to what I’d said yesterday, that he helped me because he liked me.

    “Uh… yes.”

    And as I answered, my heart, which had just calmed down, started racing again.

    Then…

    “Look at my eyes when you answer.”

    When I raised my head, his eyes were also trembling. Why?

    I stared at them, almost entranced. They were beautiful and strange. His irises flickered like crashing waves yet also blazed like fire…

    No, wait.

    It wasn’t that they gave two impressions at once, there were two of them.

    Did he take off the eyepatch?

    My body jolted, but I couldn’t move beyond that. I felt as if I were bound by invisible ropes, stiff and frozen, staring only at his eyes.

    I couldn’t see his face. A deep gray mist seemed to blur everything except the two blue eyes burning in the fog.

    Those two clear blue eyes stared straight into me.

    “Do you think I like you?”

    Even his voice reverberated strangely. Like I was hearing him underwater.

    I stared at him, no, at his eyes, blankly. The ringmaster stepped closer.

    “I don’t know why you got that idea.”

    Then, cupping my face with both hands, he said,

    “But forget that memory.”

    His voice was firm, vibrating through my skull.

    “Understand, Choi Yeonho?”

    “…Yes.”

    And suddenly, my vision went completely black.

    * * *

    “……”

    What time is it?

    I lifted my left wrist to check the watch.

    “…?”

    I blinked and checked again. But nothing changed. Surprised, I shot up in bed.

    Inside the guest room with no windows, it was impossible to see outside.

    So to check whether my watch was broken, I rushed straight to the office. There, the ringmaster was sitting at his desk, working. And outside the window, there was no sunlight.

    It wasn’t dark, just tinted blue. Exactly like summer at 6 p.m.

    “Uh, so… is the travel over?”

    The ringmaster stared at me quietly, let out a small sigh, and nodded. Before I could figure out the meaning behind that sigh, I hurriedly held my hand out to him.

    “Please give me Samdu’s food.”

    “I fed him earlier.”

    “Then I’ll go check on them.”

    As I turned quickly, the ringmaster’s voice followed behind me.

    “Come eat before the members wake up.”

    When I opened the door and looked back, he added,

    “There’s meat in the storage across from the fridge.”

    “Really? There was meat?”

    I stared at him in disbelief as he nodded, then shut the door and cursed inside my head.

    You stingy man. You could’ve told me earlier.

    Maybe because I’d slept well for the first time in a while, my body felt a little lighter as I ran toward the shack. At the same time, I had an unfamiliar ache in muscles I couldn’t identify. But ever since coming to this circus, constant fatigue had become normal, so I ignored it and ran toward Samdu’s cage.

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