TBM Vol 2 Part 22

But only until the drama finished filming. Spending too much time together without the buffer of work could spark rumors. And he didn’t want Lee Il-seo to be the target of that kind of talk. The kid was nice, but his public image wasn’t exactly pristine. With filming now well into the second half, the timing felt right.

Sa Seung-yeon removed his earphones and called out to Hwan.

“Hwan.”

“Yes, hyung-nim.”

“Let’s buy a bottle of juice from a 24-hour store on the way.”

Since Sa Seung-yeon rarely drank anything besides coffee, Hwan asked to confirm if he just wanted juice.

“Juice, sir?”

“Yeah, orange or tangerine flavor.”

“Understood.”

A faint smile crept across Sa Seung-yeon’s face without him realizing it. Hwan, who had a habit of watching his boss’s mood through the mirror, stiffened a little at the unexpected softness. Just moments ago, Seung-yeon had been cursing like a storm.

***

Not long after arriving home, the alarm rang from the first-floor lobby. Standing in front of the intercom panel, Sa Seung-yeon paused his hand just before pressing the button and looked at the screen.

Lee Il-seo’s slender face appeared, pretty features unmistakable even through the grainy resolution. He stood waiting patiently, blinking up at the camera as if asking permission to come in. Something warm and inexplicable fluttered in Seung-yeon’s chest as he deliberately pressed the open button—slowly. The screen darkened, leaving behind the lingering blur of movement.

A few seconds later, the doorbell rang. Though he could have unlocked it remotely, Seung-yeon walked over and opened it himself. He saw the small face tilt up and then stiffen slightly. Despite seeing each other daily for months, when would he ever stop being flustered? Sa Seung-yeon asked first with naturally smiling eyes.

“Did you shower?”

“Ah… Yes.”

“Come in.”

At his nod, Lee Il-seo stepped inside, slipped off his shoes, and made his way to the living room. He sat with his bag still in his lap, waiting quietly for Seung-yeon to join him. He is not the ideal personality for a celebrity—too shy and awkward with small talk—but Seung-yeon liked him just like that.

He was so easy to read and transparent. Smiling at Lee Il-seo, Sa Seung-yeon saw him meet his eyes and try to pull up the corners of his mouth similarly. It was awkward, but an endearing face worthy of fondness.

“Did you bring the results?”

“Ah, yes.”

He had been fidgeting with his bag strap all along, seemingly eager to hand over the results first. Lee Il-seo opened his bag, took out the paper, and held it out. Sa Seung-yeon received the paper with his legs crossed.

“My results are on the table.”

“Ah, yes.”

Lee Il-seo looked at the results as he answered, but didn’t seem inclined to examine them, just waiting without touching them. Sa Seung-yeon carefully turned the two pages of results, reading the constitutional and STD test outcomes.

“Constitutional type is Beta.”

“…”

“Test results negative or no reaction, normal.”

With each reading of the long list of STD categories, almost a full page long, Lee Il-seo felt tense despite already knowing the results. After checking the final item, Sa Seung-yeon looked up.

“You’re clean.”

 Lee Il-seo bit his lip and nodded, and Sa Seung-yeon folded the results neatly as before and placed them on the coffee table. After gazing at  Lee Il-seo for a moment, Sa Seung-yeon spoke in a gentle voice.

“Ah, I have something for you too.”

Rising from his seat, Sa Seung-yeon took out orange juice from the refrigerator and poured it into a glass.  Lee Il-seo raised his eyebrows slightly as he accepted the cup. His long-lashed eyes blinked slowly, taking in the bright orange color.

“You like this flavor, don’t you?”

“Oh, yes.”

Even as he answered, a bewildered smile spread across his face. Sa Seung-yeon took a sip of his own portion of juice and sat on the sofa.

“I bought it because you said you liked it, and it is good.”

Sa Seung-yeon put down his glass and smiled plainly. The pale amber lighting accentuated his dimples.

A strange warmth rose in Il-seo’s chest. From just a glass of juice. Embarrassed, he looked away and drank quickly, the cold juice soothing and sharp.

“I’m not going to take it away.”

Squinting one eye and letting out a breathy laugh, Sa Seung-yeon looked at Lee Il-seo’s neck as he swallowed the juice, then slowly withdrew his smile and placed a cigarette between his lips. After turning his head to blow out smoke, Sa Seung-yeon asked  Lee Il-seo,

“What do you usually do when you are off after filming?”

Wiping the corner of his mouth with the back of his hand, Lee Il-seo swallowed the juice that had filled his cheeks and replied,

“Just, stay home. Sometimes go to the practice room or gym.”

“Hmm, have you thought about dating?”

The question, gentle but sudden, made Lee Il-seo’s hand tremble as he set down his empty glass. The clink echoed in the quiet room. He struggled to swallow the last bit of juice.

“Well, not really…”

Nodding as he tapped ash into the ashtray, Sa Seung-yeon put the cigarette back between his lips and continued.

“Are you close with Park Jae-ho?”

Lee Il-seo looked up at the unexpected name. Seung-yeon was smiling, wordless but sharp. As Lee Il-seo nodded lightly, Seung-yeon’s eyes narrowed.

“Have you slept with him?”

“With Jae-ho hyung?”

“You’ve slept with me, and we’re not as close, so nothing is stopping you.”

 Lee Il-seo, who laughed a bit late out of bewilderment, shook his head and said,

“He’s just like a real brother to me. He doesn’t even know I like men.”

“Hmm.”

When Sa Seung-yeon only responded with an ambiguous sound and expression, Lee Il-seo watched him cautiously and swallowed dryly. Having such a personal conversation with Sa Seung-yeon felt strange. Sa Seung-yeon had a wide network, but he wasn’t the type to let people get close.

He’d been to his house more than once now. Tonight, there’d been juice waiting for him. Maybe, slowly, things could change? A small desire stirred within him, and courage welled up. While biting his rolled lips, Lee Il-seo naturally threw out a question.

“What about you, sunbaenim?”

When Sa Seung-yeon merely raised his eyebrows slightly, Lee Il-seo added what he was truly curious about.

“Are you seeing anyone?”

At Lee Il-seo’s question, Sa Seung-yeon finally burst out laughing, waving his palm to disperse the smoke going toward Lee Il-seo and putting out his cigarette.

“I shouldn’t be, right? After rolling around with you like that yesterday.”

Lee Il-seo’s ears turned undeniably red. He felt relieved just knowing that Sa Seung-yeon wasn’t dating anyone, but when he mentioned their relationship as the reason, his heart pounded unnecessarily. Afraid of revealing his pathetic feelings, he pressed his cold fingertips against his ears.

“I don’t date.”

“…Why not?”

“Hmm. Maybe for the same reason as you.”

As if he hadn’t expected to be asked for a reason, Sa Seung-yeon paused for a moment before answering with a light smile.

“I don’t really understand spending energy on liking someone.”

Lee Il-seo’s heartbeat slowed at that. The flush on his cheeks cooled. But a strange hollowness settled in his stomach. He rubbed it lightly, as though trying to smooth away the discomfort. Seung-yeon looked at him and said, quieter now

“From what I saw yesterday, you don’t seem to mind physical intimacy even if you don’t date.”

“…”

“Is that how you usually satisfy your urges?”

 Lee Il-seo’s eyes trembled. He wanted to say no, but his tongue felt stiff and wouldn’t move.

Because he didn’t want Seung-yeon to be with someone else, because he feared his heart would ache all night if he let Sa Seung-yeon go like that, and because it was Sa Seung-yeon. Among all the overflowing reasons that made his heart ache, there wasn’t a single one he could honestly share.

 Lee Il-seo broke the silence with a weak laugh and answered,

“Ah, yes. Well, that’s right.”

That fake, casual tone made the corner of Seung-yeon’s mouth curl, just slightly, and not kindly.

“How do you find partners?”

“Just appropriately…”

“Appropriately?”

“If we click, we sleep together… Roughly speaking…”

It was the kind of line Haru might say in a script. Lies came easier once you started. But even as he spoke, his palms grew damp.

Meanwhile, Sa Seung-yeon slowly withdrew his smile as he looked at him, uncrossed his legs leisurely, and interlaced his fingers. Isn’t it because entertainers like him are so careless that dirty rumors about Gu Dong-yeong and Chae Geum-soo follow them around?

“I see.”

Sa Seung-yeon suppressed the nameless ripple that was about to rise and forcibly maintained a calm expression. It was not difficult to propose this kind of relationship because Lee Il-seo was honest about his desires, and it seemed their values were similar, making him easy to persuade—that was the rational judgment. But at the same time, an indescribable emotion arose.

Perhaps it was because of Lee Il-seo, who had just casually stated that he’d spread his legs for anyone he clicked with, yet still maintained his characteristically calm and dry face. With a strange feeling of spite, Sa Seung-yeon swept back his hair and spoke slowly.

“Hmm… For me, it wasn’t just ‘appropriately,’ but a really good match.”

Sure enough, he could feel the doll-like face wince and freeze. Even if Lee Il-seo were promiscuous and didn’t prefer regular relationships, Sa Seung-yeon knew. He had a weapon more powerful than anything else to sway Lee Il-seo.

“Lee Il-seo.”

“Yes?”

“How about only being with me while filming the drama?”

Sa Seung-yeon tilted his head slightly as he looked at Lee Il-seo. His bangs fell naturally, tickling his eyebrows, and his eye corners, shadowed by his eyelashes in the light, gradually curved.

“I’ll buy you lots of juice.”