TCFMSCBF 2: Parents

With a cup of instant noodles in his stomach, Chi Chi felt much better overall.

He sat on the floor, leaning against the sofa to watch TV.

Huo Xiao Cha stood up, intending to take away the instant noodle cup in front of him.

Chi Chi patted his hand. “I’ll clean up in a bit. You can’t hold it steadily.”

Huo Xiao Cha could only sit down obediently, but he felt truly uneasy.

Daddy really seemed to have changed a bit. He didn’t know how to get along with this version of his daddy.

What if daddy lost his patience and told him to get lost again?

Huo Xiao Cha silently lifted his bottom, wanting to scooch away a bit, but then he was held in place by Chi Chi.

“I knew you didn’t want to watch Today’s Law. This show is so good.”

Chi Chi attributed his restlessness to the natural fear a vicious male supporting character had for the law.

Sure enough, the law is a vicious male supporting character’s ultimate nemesis!

Chi Chi pulled him to his side. He hugged him and said, “Watch it.”

Now, accept the baptism of the law!

Huo Xiao Cha squirmed a bit, then tumbled into his arms. “Daddy, I don’t want to watch, it’s so scary…”

“Is it scary? It’s good that it’s scary—this is the consequence of breaking the law and order. The law won’t let a single bad person off the hook…”

Chi Chi looked down at the cub.

The cub was hugging his neck, his face pressed against his chest, and his eyes were all red.

Chi Chi looked up at the TV. Perhaps… maybe… this kind of show was still a bit too early for him.

Wincing with reluctance, Chi Chi switched the channel back to ‘Makka Pakka.’

“Fine, fine, you watch this one then.”

Huo Xiao Cha pressed his face against his. “Daddy is so good. Thank you Daddy.”

Chi Chi couldn’t resist and pressed his face back against him. “Good.”

Huo Xiao Cha smiled and leaned back in his arms to watch TV.

After accompanying Huo Xiao Cha through half an episode of ‘Makka Pakka,’ Chi Chi really couldn’t take it anymore and finally fled using the excuse of cleaning up the instant noodle cups.

He stood in the kitchen and closed the glass door.

Huo Xiao Cha called out to him from outside, “Daddy, come out and watch TV with me.”

Chi Chi solemnly put on the little floral-print apron. “I can’t. Daddy has to wash the dishes.”

—the instant noodle cups were sitting in the sink.

“Okay, then Daddy, come over quickly, okay?”

When Huo Xiao Cha turned his head back, the smile on his face vanished without a trace.

Heh, he still hasn’t changed one bit. He will probably find another excuse to go out and have fun in a moment.

*

After dawdling in the kitchen for half an hour, Chi Chi finally adjusted his state of mind. He took a deep breath, pulled open the glass door, and faced reality.

Huo Xiao Cha was still watching TV. Chi Chi walked out with a grand air and took a tour of the little apartment.

A standard two-bedroom apartment with a living room, kitchen, and bathroom. It looked a bit old, but the decor was quite cozy.

After familiarizing himself with the environment, Chi Chi went back to the bedroom and scavenged around for useful items.

Various documents and his phone—it should be the original owner’s phone, but for some reason, his fingerprint could unlock it.

Chi Chi put everything on the table and inspected them one by one.

The various documents all had his name on them.

Chi Chi understood. Generally speaking, having the same name is a necessary condition for book-transmigration.

Chi Chi looked through all the documents once and discovered that the ID number was exactly the same as his number before transmigrating.

How strange.

Chi Chi frowned, unable to figure out the reason behind it, so he simply stopped thinking about it.

This is actually pretty good. He wouldn’t have to memorize a new number.

Among them were also documents that could prove Huo Xiao Cha really was his cub.

This dispelled Chi Chi’s idea of taking Huo Xiao Cha for a paternity test.

Doing a paternity test costs money, so the stingy Chi Chi chose to believe the hospital’s birth certificate.

Pushing all the documents to one side, Chi Chi took out the original owner’s phone and successfully unlocked it once again.

It seemed the original owner not only shared his name, but even had the same fingerprints as him.

So, was it a soul transmigration? Was he using the original owner’s body right now?

Thinking this, Chi Chi opened the phone’s front-facing camera, looking up, down, left, and right while tilting his neck to give himself a full 360-degree inspection.

That wasn’t it either. He still looked exactly as he did before transmigrating into the book.

Could it be that the original owner even looked exactly like him?

This was truly a bit too much of a coincidence.

Chi Chi turned his head and lifted the hem of his shirt, spotting a fingernail-sized scar on his back—this was indeed his own body.

It seemed it really was a body transmigration.

Chi Chi opened the browser and searched for the novel he had been reading last night, Transmigrating as the Little Bamboo Horse of the Goose-garten Bully. There wasn’t a single trace, as if this book simply didn’t exist in this world.

Chi Chi gave a long sigh, took out paper and a pen, and prepared to write down all the plot points he could remember.

Lottery numbers… hadn’t been mentioned in the book.

Rising stocks… weren’t mentioned in the book either.

The future richest man… nothing on that either.

Chi Chi patted his own cheeks. Chi Chi, wake up. Get a grip.

He looked up and met Huo Xiao Cha’s gaze, which looked as if he were staring at an idiot.

Chi Chi frowned. Huo Xiao Cha quickly pulled back his gaze and asked, “Daddy, what are you doing?”

Chi Chi answered with a straight face, “Daddy is planning out your life for you.”

He picked up the pen and scrawled three characters right in the middle of the blank sheet of paper—Huo Xiao Cha.

After waking up, he still vaguely remembered Huo Xiao Cha’s storyline.

He drew a diagram with Huo Xiao Cha as the central figure and two branches, one for daddy and one for mommy.

Chi Chi hesitated for a moment before finally deciding to fill in his own name in the ‘Daddy’ column.

However—

“Xiao Cha.” Chi Chi turned his head and asked, “Is my surname also Huo?”

In that case, he would have to be called Huo Chi.

Huo Xiao Cha gave him a confused look and pointed to the ID he had just tossed aside. “Daddy, your surname is Chi.”

Chi Chi maintained his smile. Oh, this damn goldfish-like memory of mine.

It seemed Huo Xiao Cha took his mother’s surname.

Chi Chi met the boy’s suspicious gaze and straightened his back. “I’m giving you a little test. Do you know what Daddy’s name is?”

Huo Xiao Cha grew even more bewildered. “Daddy, your name is Chi Chi.”

“Mm, very good.” Chi Chi nodded with satisfaction. “Then what is Daddy’s daddy called?”

Huo Xiao Cha shook his head.

Chi Chi raised an eyebrow at him. “Daddy’s daddy is called Grandpa.”

He turned back, filling in his own name in Huo Xiao Cha’s ‘Daddy’ column. As for the mommy column…

Chi Chi decisively crossed out the word ‘Mommy,’ changing it to ‘Parent No. 2: Huo XX.’

Huo XX sullied the sacred title of ‘Mommy.’

He remembered that Huo Xiao Cha was the result of this Huo XX ‘climbing into the bed’ of someone wealthy. She was normally not good to Huo Xiao Cha and did nothing but constantly extort money.

He didn’t want to stir up Huo Xiao Cha’s painful memories so he didn’t ask.

Chi Chi then drew three boxes further down, representing—

Childhood, Adulthood, and the Final Ending.

Huo Xiao Cha’s ‘misdeeds’ during his childhood were simply too many to count—a single sheet of paper wouldn’t be enough to list them all. From fighting the protagonist couple for little red flowers and building blocks to arguing and brawling, he hadn’t missed a single one.

Adulthood was even more terrifying—it could be described as his “Great Demon King” form. He directly ruined the business of the protagonist couple’s company, even planting corporate spies and inciting full-on business wars.

As for the final ending…

Chi Chi turned his head to look at the young Huo Xiao Cha. The tip of his pen paused. Ultimately, he didn’t have the heart to write down the words ‘plane crash, everyone dead,’ and instead drew a little airplane in their place.

To prevent Huo Xiao Cha from growing up crooked and meeting such a tragic end, the most critical thing was education from a young age.

In education, the most important part was family education; for family education, the most important part was the parents.

So Chi Chi turned back again to sort through Huo Xiao Cha’s guardians.

Huo Xiao Cha’s Daddy…

At the moment, it was himself.

Actually, the original owner didn’t seem all that reliable either, as evidenced by Huo Xiao Cha cooking instant noodles by himself and the house being filled with puffed snacks.

Huo Xiao Cha’s Mommy… no, Parent No. 2—at the moment, he only knew their surname was Huo.

The original novel said this Huo XX loved a life of debauchery and could never settle down. That didn’t really matter, though. It was for the best if Huo XX didn’t settle down, as she wouldn’t lead the cub astray, much less interfere with him educating the cub.

Perfect.

Chi Chi nodded with satisfaction.

He had a nagging feeling he had forgotten some part of the setting, but it didn’t matter. This full sheet of paper should just about cover it.

Chi Chi folded the paper and solemnly tucked it between the pages of the book.

He looked at Huo Xiao Cha. “Huo Xiao Cha, from today onward, I am your Daddy. In the future, as long as I have a bite of meat to eat, there will be a bowl for you to wash. I will take up the responsibility of raising and educating you—this is the will of heaven.”

Chi Chi reached out a hand toward him. “Please advise me more.”

Huo Xiao Cha: ???

This daddy must have damaged his brain while sleeping last night.

By the time Chi Chi finished sorting out the entire plot, it was already evening. 

He put down his pen and stretched, startled to realize it was already dinner time, so he asked, “Xiao Cha, what do you want to eat tonight?”

Huo Xiao Cha frowned. Here it came again. Daddy was surely going to make him something to eat again, and then take him to the Huo household tomorrow to make him sing his praises in front of the Huo family.

Had his daddy still not given up on the idea of taking him into the Huo family?

Chi Chi looked around the room, taking in the mountain of instant noodles and puffed snacks. He thought back to this afternoon when he had already finished ruining the very last head of lettuce in the kitchen.

He had only just arrived here. It was already dark so it wasn’t convenient to head out with Huo Xiao Cha.

Seeing his troubled expression, Huo Xiao Cha said, “Daddy, you don’t need to cook. I’ll just have a little something…”

Then, Xiao Cha watched with wide eyes as Chi Chi opened a food delivery app.

Wasn’t he going to cook himself so he could get people to praise him?

Chi Chi waved his phone at him. “Cub, let’s order takeout. What do you want to eat?”

In the end, Chi Chi ordered two servings of healthy porridge. Using the app’s GPS location, he finally learned the name of the residential complex he lived in, then used an errand service to buy a bunch of new daily necessities.

Chi Chi: I’m so brilliant.

After finishing dinner, seeing that it was about time, he urged Huo Xiao Cha to go take a bath.

Huo Xiao Cha wanted to wash himself. Before he went in, Chi Chi checked with him repeatedly. “Can you really wash yourself?”

Huo Xiao Cha nodded. “I can. I’ve always washed myself.”

Chi Chi still wasn’t at ease. He went into the bathroom, helped him drag out the children’s bathtub, and only left after he had filled it with warm water.

The door had only just closed when Chi Chi knocked on it. “You didn’t fall down, did you?”

Huo Xiao Cha replied, “No.”

“Every five minutes, let’s say something to each other.”

“Got it.”

Chi Chi sat on the sofa outside, scrolling through his phone and keeping a close eye on the clock, speaking to him every five minutes.

It wasn’t long before Huo Xiao Cha came out.

Chi Chi looked at his clothes. It was noticeably a size too small and washed until they were faded and pilled. He frowned. Was the original owner abusing him?

Chi Chi stood up, preparing to take him back to the bedroom. “Do you want to sleep with me? Or…”

As soon as Huo Xiao Cha turned around, he accidentally revealed a small hole on his butt.

Chi Chi: “Pfft—!”

He really didn’t mean to laugh…

Without looking back, Huo Xiao Cha ran back to his own room. Chi Chi followed and knocked on the door. He said to him, “Wake up early tomorrow. I’m taking you to buy new clothes.”

Huo Xiao Cha gave a sound of agreement, then scrambled over to the desk and pulled a little notebook out of the drawer. On the cover, written in large characters, was—

【Daddy and Xiao Cha’s Account Book】

He gripped the pencil tightly and wrote a few lines on the paper:

【August 16th】

【Ate instant noodles, 1 serving】

Huo Xiao Cha wanted to record every single thing he had eaten or used that belonged to his daddy, so that he could pay him back once he grew up.

Villainous male supporting character keeping a scorecard.jpg

…

Wait a minute. Huo Xiao Cha’s pen tip paused for a moment. How to write the character for ‘porridge’?

The grudge-keeping was forced to a halt.