THIFSGSTW CH 23

Chapter 23: This Isn’t What I Wanted

Without a second thought, I stood in Sun Yi-han’s way. What is this? A monster? There’s never been anything like this before.

Could it have seeped into the tree? No way. The moment that thought crossed my mind—

Thud.

It happened in an instant. A sharp pain shot through me. I swallowed back a groan that threatened to escape. A thick, gnarled branch had pierced through my waist and just as quickly retracted. Forcing my scattered thoughts into focus, I cast a magic.

Vines shot up from the ground, coiling tightly around the tree. That should be enough. It wouldn’t be able to move anymore.

I sensed Sun Yi-han’s presence behind me. A wave of relief washed over me. I had blocked the attack just in time—he wasn’t hurt.

Tap.

Soft footsteps echoed. Sun Yi-han was approaching me, slowly. My head was spinning. I couldn’t move a single finger. My vision blurred, and a cold shiver ran through my body. I must have lost a significant amount of blood.

“Kh… Ugh….”

Blood surged up from deep inside me. A metallic taste filled my mouth as thick liquid trickled down my lips.

Tap.

His quiet footsteps drew closer, hesitantly, as if he was unsure.

…No. I couldn’t let him see me like this. He probably already had, but still—it was better if he didn’t see any more.

Sun Yi-han had never been in battle. He had likely never seen anyone injured this badly. This moment would surely leave a scar on him. I didn’t want to be the reason for his trauma. I didn’t want him to remember me like this.

I had to send him away. Now.

Step.

The sound of his footsteps stopped right in front of me.

Kneeling on the ground, my head bowed, I saw the hem of his white robes flutter gently. A pool of crimson spread at his feet. Gritting my teeth, I forced out a trembling breath and spoke.

“Yi-han… It’s dangerous. Go back.”

The tree that had attacked me was restrained, but that didn’t mean this place was safe. And in this state, I couldn’t protect him. He still had the return stone. If he used it to go back and call for help, that would be enough.

But until then…

I felt my body temperature dropping. A chilling sensation crept through me, as if all the blood in my body was draining away.

‘…I’m not going to die here, right?’

…No, that was a real possibility. More than a possibility—it was almost certain. A wound like this… There was no way I’d make it back alive.

But it was fine. Even if this was the end, it was okay. I had always known this day would come the moment I swore my oath as a hero. I just didn’t expect it to be so sudden.

Thinking about it, maybe it was a relief. If things had gone differently, Sun Yi-han could have been the one standing in my place. Just then, Sun Yi-han reached out to me. Slender, burning fingertips cupped my cheek gently, lifting my head.

Through my hazy vision, I saw him clearly. The setting sun painted his pale face in soft crimson. I couldn’t see his expression, but somehow, it felt like I could finally breathe.

He was alive. And he would continue to live. That was enough.

Leader Hyung, Song Ha-gyeon, Min Joo-hyuk. Unlike me, they were all strong people. They’d get through this without me. It was a relief. That I was the one here instead of them.

So please, Yi-han—

‘Go back.’

I needed him to leave. Because if he didn’t, he might still be here when I took my last breath. As I braced myself for the worst—

Sun Yi-han’s hand, which had been brushing lightly over my lips, suddenly froze.

The blood on my mouth slowly flowed trailing down his pale fingers and fell to the ground.

At the time when the blood drops, and drew a circle.

Flash. A brilliant light engulfed me.

It was a blue light. A clear glow, like the morning dawn, enveloped my entire body. The pain was subsiding. It felt as if my wounds were slowly healing. The shadow of death that had crept so close seemed to be swept away. No, rather than being swept away, it felt as if it was being absorbed into that light.

But how? Everything was happening too suddenly. As the crushing pain disappeared, my mind began working rapidly. This blue light was definitely—

“…Yi-han?”

My heart dropped. Could he really use healing magic on wounds this severe? Could this even be called healing? This was more like bringing someone back from the brink of death.

My fingertips went cold. I quickly lifted my head. At the same moment, the blue light that had been surrounding me suddenly pulled away.

Whoosh.

The light surged violently back into Sun Yi-han, slamming into him as though being forcibly shoved. In this place, where the sunset cast a crimson glow, Sun Yi-han alone flickered in a radiant blue before it faded away. His knees buckled. His white clothing was being stained red with blood. Just before he collapsed, I thought I saw a faint smile on his face. But that couldn’t be…

With trembling hands, I reached out. My chest felt tight. I was afraid. The spreading blood—it was the exact spot where I had been wounded.

No, it couldn’t be. It mustn’t be. Until now, whenever Sun Yi-han used healing magic, this had never happened. This was as if… he had taken my wound upon himself. I grabbed his shoulders urgently. His thin frame shuddered as he slowly lifted his head. He looked utterly exhausted.

“Yi-han!”

I desperately called out, begging him not to lose consciousness. My throat choked up with tears. But Sun Yi-han, as if he couldn’t hear my voice, simply gazed vacantly somewhere beyond me.

His expression didn’t seem to be one of pain, but rather… as if he were deep in thought.

Then, in that instant, his gaze locked onto mine. His dim, water-like eyes clearly reflected my figure. The corners of his trembling lips slowly curled upward. Sun Yi-han was smiling, looking relieved.

Not the kind of smile that hid something underneath, not the kind that teetered on the edge of breaking—

But a pure, open smile, as bright and clear as the sky after rain.

The kind of smile I had once wished to see.

“…Why?”

The question escaped me before I realized it. Blood trickled from the corner of Sun Yi-han’s mouth. His thin shoulders, which my hands held, were growing cold. And yet, he continued to smile, as if he was relieved. The sunset deepened into red. It felt as if he was melting into the light. Only his blue eyes, tinged with that smile, shone in the flickering dusk.

I… I didn’t want to see that smile under these circumstances.

I didn’t want to see him save me, take my wounds upon himself, and then smile so peacefully.

The memory of that searing pain that had gripped me just moments ago surfaced. Sun Yi-han must be feeling the same agony. No, worse—he had never suffered such a wound before.

What am I supposed to do?

“…Hah, kuh…”

Yi-han gasped, struggling to speak. Blood spilled from his lips.

Pain, raw and suffocating, seeped into every breath he took. And yet, still, he smiled faintly, struggling to focus his eyes on me. Then, slowly, he formed the words.

“Raen-hyung… believe…”

For a moment, my breath caught. My body stiffened.

Believe in what? I had done nothing for him. All I could do was hold him tightly as he was falling apart, clutching my pounding heart as tears spilled down my face.

And yet, what was it that he believed in about me?

“…Hyung, …me.”

Yi-han fought to speak again.

Suddenly, I wanted to hear him say that he wanted to live.

That he didn’t want to die like this. That he still wanted to live. That he wanted me to save him, just as he had saved me.

I wanted to hear those words. Because then, no matter what it took—

Through the whirlwind of thoughts, his fading voice reached my ears.

“…Believe in me.”

It was a desperate plea, spoken as if his very being was unraveling.

As soon as he finished speaking, his face eased into a peaceful expression. His blue eyes, which had held me within them, closed as if the night had fallen.

My blood ran cold. My mind snapped back into focus.

All the questions that had clouded my thoughts—about myself, about him, about this world—vanished in an instant. I didn’t know what exactly Sun Yi-han wanted me to believe in. But I knew one thing for certain. Whatever it was, I had no choice but to believe in him. So I couldn’t let him go. I couldn’t lose him like this.

Sun Yi-han collapsed into my arms, his weight frighteningly light. Heat surged behind my eyes. My vision blurred with tears. I clung to him desperately.

‘I believe in you, Yi-han.’

Whatever it is, I’ll believe you. I’ll tell you that I do, no matter what.

So you can’t die—this can’t—end here. I laid him down and urgently tore at my clothes. Could I even stop a wound of this size from bleeding? My fingers trembled.

As the fabric tore away, I was met with something shining—tiny specks of blue light. It was the same light I had seen when I first met Sun Yi-han. It seemed like mana, yet something entirely different. That light pressed down on the gaping wound in his abdomen. Blood surged out, but the wound began to close.

Whoosh.

In an instant, the tiny orbs of light were absorbed into him and disappeared. A large scar formed where the wound had been. I ran my fingers over it. The sticky warmth of blood clung to my skin. Beneath it, I felt soft flesh and a faint warmth.

I lowered my head, pressing my ear to his chest.

His breathing was slow, steady.

“…Yi-han.”

I called his name, but there was no answer. My voice, swallowed by the setting sun, faded into silence.

The sky was blazing with the last light of dusk. Sun Yi-han lay there, pale-faced, wrapped in bloodstained cloth. I removed my cloak carefully wrapped it around him, then cradled him carefully in my arms.

A fragile warmth settled into my arms. Only now did my heart begin to beat again. The sun had almost set. The empty sky darkened as night seeped in.

“…Let’s go home.”

I held him tightly and spoke with resolve. Then, I quietly chanted a magic. A strong gust of wind surged around us.

When I opened my eyes, we had returned to the quarters.

Together.

◇

Crash.

The sound of glass shattering rang through the room. Three pairs of eyes, wide with shock, turned toward us.

“Raen-hyung…? Sun Yi-han?”

Min Joo-hyuk’s trembling voice broke the silence.

Night had fallen.

Urgent footsteps echoed through the large hall downstairs as someone ran toward us.