THIFSGSTW CH 31

Chapter 31: Because I Can’t Die Yet

The moment Park Yul’s fingertips brushed against me, a faint glow rippled outward. I felt the sticky blood around my mouth vanish completely. His hand slowly withdrew.

The blood that had stained the floor and my sleeves had disappeared as well. It seemed like he had used a cleansing spell. At some point, my healing gauge had completely emptied.

“Yihan-ah… you…”

Park Yul trailed off, leaving his sentence unfinished. It was rare to see him like this, he usually spoke with composure and certainty, giving directions without hesitation.

Park Yul gently stroked my hair. Then, with his usual smile, he spoke.

“You must have been really startled.”

I shook my head lightly. Of course, my heart had dropped when he caught me coughing up blood, but there was no need to admit that. Telling him would only make him worry. I had to move past this topic as naturally as possible.

Park Yul watched me in silence, as if lost in thought, then patted the blanket beside him. The soft fabric sank slightly under his touch.

As I watched him, he spoke again, slowly.

“Do you want to rest for a bit?”

I was exhausted. Mentally, at least. But I wasn’t particularly sleepy. Instead of answering, I just met his gaze. Park Yul’s eyes crinkled as he smiled, and he gave a small beckoning gesture.

The thick blanket lifted with a soft whoosh, sending a faint floral scent into the air.

With him going this far, there was no way I could refuse to lie down. Not that I actually wanted to sleep or anything. It was just better to at least pretend to rest until he left. That way, he might worry a little less.

I crawled under the covers, and Park Yul gently draped the blanket over me.

“Good night, Yi-han.”

His voice reached me faintly. The pillow beneath my head was warm and comforting. So was the blanket. My eyes drifted shut. I really hadn’t planned on sleeping, though…?

Maybe I was more tired than I thought. After all, a lot had happened.

I felt fingers brushing my hair back. A delicate floral scent lingered in the air. In my drowsy haze, I thought I heard Park Yul’s voice. But I couldn’t make out what he was saying.

And just like that, I sank into sleep. It had been a long time since I’d fallen asleep this quickly.

◇

For a long while, Park Yul simply gazed down at Sun Yi-han’s pale, sleeping face. Then, as if unbidden, a memory surfaced—Yi-han calling his name in that clear, gentle voice.

Park Yul’s Perspective

---

‘Yul-hyung.’

It was our first meeting. The hem of his clothes fluttered in the autumn wind, stark white against the air, and his light blue eyes gleamed as though catching the sunlight. Sun Yi-han’s calm, tranquil eyes, like the surface of still water, reflected my image within them.

Ever since I had heard he would be joining us, I had spent days thinking about Sun Yi-han. The brief statement from the temple that he “would be of help” was not enough reason to accept him in without hesitation.

But the moment I actually faced him, I just realized how young he was. In truth, the one I should have been wary of from the start was never Sun Yi-han. Seventeen. An age far too young to understand everything about the world. Sun Yi-han must have been pushed here, urged forward by others, simply because he was told he had to save the world.

Suddenly, I recalled the Hero’s Oath from long ago. Min Joo-hyuk, Song Ha-gyeon, and Raen had all taken that same oath. To be honest, I had never wanted them to make such an oath. One hero was enough.

And yet, in the end, we had no choice but to stand together like this. Because the world had always been harsh, and even crueler part of that was—

‘Something called Fate’

Yes. Fate was always merciless and cold.

I still remember the day I was chosen as the hero of this generation and summoned to the temple. The pitch-black room I had walked into alone at dawn. 

That day, the being known as “God” showed me my destiny—both mine and the world’s.

A sky dyed dark red and black, where time itself seemed to have stopped. A large number of rifts, massive and jagged, torn in the air like open wounds. And there, standing alone beneath that crumbling world was me. As the blade’s cold gleam pulsed against my beating heart, and the moment of destruction loomed closer, everything disappeared. Like a fleeting dream, leaving behind no trace.

Like that, the peace had been maintained and would continue to be maintained. The shattered black temple would rebuild itself as if it had never fallen, and then, to face the next destruction, another would be chosen to grasp the sword.

I had never particularly believed in the existence of a god. But now, I could no longer deny it.

‘A fixed future.’

A well-arranged chessboard. Pieces moving as they were designed to. And in the end, arriving at a conclusion that had been decided from the very beginning.

I couldn’t see every detail, but I could faintly grasp the broad strokes of the future. And, in truth, that was even crueler. Because no matter what happened in between, the ending was already set in stone.

What would happen to me from this point forward?

And, ultimately, how would it all end?

The moment I came to understand my own fate—

‘…Why?’

What I had felt wasn’t despair. It was a strange sense of emptiness.

I wanted to scream at someone, tell them not to say something so ridiculous, but there was no one to blame. There was no way to reach the God I had only just come to know, and telling those around me would only burden them with the same empty void.

In the pitch-dark room where I could see nothing ahead, I sat down in silence. I shut my eyes tightly. The images carved into my mind swirled before me, making me dizzy.

And at some point, a thought surfaced. Of course. It was obvious.

Humans are powerless against nature. If rain falls, there is no way to stop it. No matter how well you use magic, you cannot control the laws of the world.

Fate must be the same.

We may feel helpless about not being able to stop the rain, but the difference is that we are dragged away without knowing our own helplessness in the face of fate.

So, in the end, this was nothing special. Nothing different from the natural order of things. If I thought about it, there was nothing I couldn’t accept.

Besides, I wasn’t the only one being dragged along this predetermined path.

It didn’t take so long to rise on my feet again. A faint smile crossed my lips as a sense of calm washed over me.

At least, it was a relief. If someone had to bear this fate, perhaps it was better that it was me. Because I was already used to giving my all for the time I had been given.

‘But Sun Yi-han… how…?’

Raen had been right, there was no such thing as healing magic. Pain, wounds, suffering, all of it existed because fate had deemed it so. Defying fate was impossible.

And yet, Sun Yi-han had undeniably used healing magic. Not just once or twice.

‘How is that possible?’

Sun Yi-han was supposed to be someone bound by fate, just like the rest of us. And yet, he could wield a power that existed outside the world’s law. That was an unexplainable thing.

“…Yihan-ah.”

Lost in thought, I unconsciously called his name. I came to my senses abruptly. Sun Yi-han’s sleeping face filled my vision.

I could hear the quiet sound of his breathing. I lifted a hand and gently brushed his cheek. His skin was soft and warm beneath my touch, likely because he was asleep.

Sun Yi-han was mysterious. And perhaps that was why I couldn’t take my eyes off him.

‘I never intended for him to come this far with us.’

I ran my fingers slowly through his jet-black hair. Memories of that day replayed vividly in my mind.

◇

“I won’t be a burden.”

Sun Yi-han’s calm voice echoed in my ears. It was just before we left for the forest at night, when I had asked him to wait. Not a single flicker of hesitation crossed his expression.

His voice remained steady as he continued. “You don’t have to worry about me.”

After a brief pause, he blinked slowly before smiling faintly.

Then, he concluded his words. “Even if I get hurt, it’s fine.”

His face remained serene, as if he truly meant it. My fingertips felt cold. His smile grew even brighter.

“I can use healing magic. If I go with you, it’ll be safer.”

His voice was firm. Behind him, sunlight streamed in, illuminating his form. Sun Yi-han tilted his head slightly. His brilliant blue eyes met Min Joo-hyuk’s.

“I know you have defensive magic. And I know you’ve done well so far.”

A bitter note entered his voice as he added, “But things don’t always go as expected. If I go with you, even if something happens, it’ll be fine.”

Min Joo-hyuk’s gaze, directed at Sun Yi-han, was trembling violently.

What Sun Yi-han said was right. Besides, defensive magic was primarily Min Joo-hyuk’s role. The burden on him must have been heavy.

But in that “in case” scenario, did Sun Yi-han include himself? He didn’t seem to care at all about the possibility of getting hurt or injured.

Sun Yi-han’s voice flowed slowly. “So, let me go with you.”

Min Joo-hyuk clenched his fist tightly, then slowly loosened it. His gaze remained fixed on Sun Yi-han. His face looked as though he didn’t know what to say.

“And, actually….”

Sun Yi-han’s words trailed off hesitantly. He lowered his head deeply for a moment before lifting it again. Then, he turned to Song Ha-gyeon and spoke.

“I don’t want to be here alone.”

He fidgeted slightly with the hem of his sleeve. Song Ha-gyeon silently took in that sight.

“This place is too big.”

Because being left alone at night was something he didn’t want. The words that followed were muttered as if to himself. Sun Yi-han’s eyes had grown unfocused, as if he wasn’t even aware that he was speaking.

Suddenly, he flinched, and focus returned to his eyes. In an instant, he returned to his usual calm expression and turned his head. His steady gaze met Raen’s unsteady eyes.

“Last time, my wound healed quickly too, didn’t it?”

Raen bit down on his lip tightly. Even though sunlight was streaming through the window, his face looked slightly pale. Sun Yi-han spoke in a light voice.

“I can’t use healing magic on myself, but it seems like major wounds heal on their own.”

“It’s a relief, right?” Sun Yi-han continued speaking with a face that showed not even a hint of doubt. He genuinely seemed to think it was fortunate.

“How?” I spoke before I even realized it.

How could he be so certain that his wounds would heal on their own? Maybe he just got lucky this time. Next time might be different. And who’s to say his injuries truly healed completely, without any lingering aftereffects?

Even so, how could Sun Yi-han speak about it so nonchalantly?

Amid my swirling thoughts, his clear voice reached me.

“Yul-hyung.”

The sunlight behind him was dazzlingly bright. But the deep blue of Sun Yi-han’s eyes, even brighter than that light, captured my reflection within them.

I stared at him, unable to blink. He smiled radiantly as he spoke.

“I can’t die yet.”

What do you mean? For a moment, my mind went completely blank. His words didn’t register, just spinning in circles inside my head. Seeing my expression, Sun Yi-han let out a small, “Ah,” as if he had realized something. Then, he quickly added,

“I mean… not for a long time. Um, it’s hard to explain, but….”

He looked briefly flustered, but soon, his composure returned. In a calm voice, he continued.

“The important thing is, I’ll be fine.”

Sun Yi-han lowered his gaze slightly. His expression was at ease. It was as if he had said everything he needed to say. His usual, languid voice followed.

“No matter what happens. So.”

“Alright, Yihan-ah.”

His gaze snapped to me. His deep, tranquil eyes waited for my next words. But strangely, he didn’t seem nervous.

As if he already had a sense of what I was about to say.