WYK 14

Finishing the reminiscence, Jeong-yoon raised his head suddenly. Just thinking about it made his chest tighten, and he let out a deep sigh.

“She suddenly came and dropped a bombshell.”

He quietly mumbled his resentment toward his older sister, Jeong-seon.

Yoo Da-jung and Kang Chae-heon were not an official couple. There were not even rumors that they were dating. However, during their senior year of high school, Jeong-yoon was the only one who witnessed Kang Chae-heon and Yoo Da-jung’s romantic relationship.

His heart raced with unease. Yoo Da-jung, who was always the object of admiration, and Kang Chae-heon, who seemed to be popular with everyone. Even in Jeong-yoon’s own opinion, Kang Chae-heon and Yoo Da-jung seemed to fit perfectly together, both in terms of appearance and circumstances.

The popular Kang Chae-heon. Kang Chae-heon, who dated Yoo Da-jung. Kang Chae-heon is still popular now.

‘I wonder how much has changed while I was in the military.’

Maybe Chae-heon would have a girlfriend. Haa, he sighed as if resigned to the idea. Even the mere mention of Chae-heon’s ex-girlfriend’s name felt suffocating. Even Jeong-yoon wouldn’t be able to handle it if Chae-heon had a new girlfriend now.

Jeong-yoon smiled bitterly. He hoped that while he was away, his emotions would fade away. He hoped that this never-ending feeling would pass and that he wouldn’t break down even if someone else was by Chae-heon’s side.

Jeong-yoon hoped and hoped again.

***

Time must be relative because, before he knew it, the month and a half before his enlistment had passed quickly. He had spent time with Mi-hee and Min-soo, met his high school friends a couple of times, and it felt like that was it. But all of a sudden, he found himself sobering up and realizing that his family was looking at him with expectant eyes.

“Your haircut makes you look like chestnuts and it’s cute. Take care and be sure to apply sunscreen as you don’t want to burn your face. Understand?”

His older sister laughed while saying that, while his mom cried a little. His older brother added, “It’s not like it’s a big deal in the military. It’s just a dark place,” and laughed.

After that, he went through his military training at a hectic pace. He went through the drills without much thought. Before he knew it, it was graduation day. Time felt both slow and fast.

On the day of the military graduation ceremony, Jeong-yoon went up to the podium and received an award. He got it because he worked hard in shooting and running. As the graduation ceremony ended and he reunited with his family, he felt strangely choked up, and his eyes reddened. But it seemed his sister Jeong-seon didn’t share the same sentiment.

“You sat on the stage just because of that award, and ended up getting sunburned. Why are you working so hard in the military, trying to drive stakes?”

“…”

Jeong-yoon silently stared at his older sister, and his older brother chuckled and said,

“Other guys are crying because of their girlfriends, why aren’t you?”

“…”

“Don’t get old and get discharged like this. If you get ugly, you’re not my brother.”

“…”

Jeong-yoon just stared at his family in silence.

Even if he did well and received an award, his family’s reactions were still bewildering. No matter how much he thought about it, his sister and brother seemed to be a bit annoying. He found his thoughts reaffirmed when his sister always gave him the hard chicken breast while they were eating chicken.

After enjoying a joyful time with his family and returning to the military base, Jeong-yoon stared blankly at the dark ceiling. He needed to sleep now, but the long forgotten emotions started to resurface after he looked at his family’s faces.

‘…I wonder if Kang Chae-heon is doing well.’

A slight trace of him could have been erased during the time Jeong-yoon was away. However, once he thought of it, the remnants of memories that he had suppressed began flooding his mind like a wave. The day he first met Kang Chae-heon. The day they were on duty together. The moment he saw Kang Chae-heon at the sports festival. The glimpses he occasionally stole of Kang Chae-heon’s profile and more. Everything about him.

Kang Chae-heon. Kang Chae-heon. Jeong-yoon chanted his name in his mind and closed his eyes. Nevertheless, the afterimage of that guy in his mind did not easily disappear.

***

Military life passed faster than expected. Jeong-yoon, who occasionally took leaves, spent his time alone at home without contacting anyone. He feared that he might think about Kang Chae-heon when meeting his university peers or talking with his high school friends.

When you don’t meet or think about someone for a long time, your feelings might fade. That was the thought behind his efforts. However, nothing changed. His longing only accumulated.

So, he spent his time alone and was discharged alone.

Sitting at his desk in his room, Jeong-yoon hunched over and arranged his class schedule. If he took major courses, he might encounter someone he knew. After all, he could make changes to his courses two weeks after the semester began, so there was no need to worry.

Running his fingers through his hair, Jeong-yoon jotted down the lecture name on his notebook. Now that his hair had grown a bit, he thought he looked fairly civilian. He had even begun to consider himself a soldier for less than two years, and his thoughts had followed suit.

‘I wonder how Kang Chae-heon is doing.’

He thought of him again as he gazed at the academic information system window.

‘Perhaps he joined the public service or something. Or maybe he’s just attending school. If I return to school this time, will we cross paths? Come to think of it, I’m a returning student now… I shouldn’t act overly friendly with the freshmen. It might make me like a boomer, though.’

His thoughts were all over the place.

Kang Chae-heon. He missed him but didn’t want to see him. He wanted to meet him but didn’t want to. What an indescribable emotion. Jeong-yoon sighed deeply and drew an indecipherable line in his notebook.

In the end, Seo Jeong-yoon’s efforts to forget Kang Chae-heon had spectacularly failed.

***

It was March. The wind was quite cold, but the scent of early spring was subtly present.

Jeong-yoon carefully explored the campus. It seemed to be the same as before, yet it also felt a bit different. The uphill path to the main gate remained unchanged, but the athletic field next to the Arts Building was covered with green artificial turf instead of dirt.

After his first class, he walked toward the department office.

「Jeong-yoon-ah. be sure to come to the department office after class. Absolutely. You must come.」

That was the message from Mi-hee.

There seemed to be students glancing at him around here and there, which felt a bit odd. Jeong-yoon, who had been idly scratching his cheek, contemplated whether he should go to the department office. In the end, he decided to go because he also wanted to meet and talk with Mi-hee after a long time.

Recalling the past, he arrived at the department office on the 8th floor. The yellowish wooden door, which he used to see to the point of tedium, felt strangely unfamiliar today.

Should he knock? After a brief hesitation, he just decided to enter. With a creaking sound, he opened the door and was met with the gazes of several pairs of eyes looking back at him.

“Uh…”

The corner of his mouth lowered slightly. The lively eyes of freshmen, brimming with curiosity, stared at him with great interest. It felt quite awkward.

‘… Where did Kwon Mi-hee go?’

Unfortunately, there was not a single person Jeong-yoon knew. Even Mi-hee was nowhere to be seen.

‘Should I just leave like this? But that doesn’t feel right. I should say hello or something. Hi? Nice to meet you. I’m your senior. …These words sound strange.’

While Jeong-yoon was wondering what to do, he quietly sat down on a chair at the table next to the door. He planned to wait until Kwon Mi-hee came to rescue him. It was a timid choice.

The girl who had been quietly observing Jeong-yoon began to look around as if to gather her courage. Then, as if emboldened, she cautiously approached him. Her footsteps seemed slightly awkward; it was evident that she wasn’t used to the high heels she was wearing.

‘She’s cute, like a chick.’

Jeong-yoon smiled a little while looking at her.

“Excuse me.”

“Yes?”

Jeong-yoon, seated in a chair, glanced up at the girl silently as she talked. She seemed a bit nervous as she briefly bit her lip and then released it.

Jeong-yoon asked again.

“What’s wrong?”

His tone was gentle. The girl, who had initiated the conversation, giggled nervously and then took a seat across from him. Jeong-yoon’s smile seems to have relieved her nervousness. Soon, she started asking him various questions.

“Is this your first time in the department office?”

“Yes?”

The timing for a proper response was missed in his bafflement. The girl leaned forward slightly and extended her upper body over the desk and asked another question.

“When you took the compulsory courses, did you sit at the back? I don’t remember seeing you.”

“Yes, I sat at the back.”

“What’s your name? I’m Seo Hyang-gi.”

“I’m Seo Jeong-yoon.”

The girl with her mouth slightly open clapped her hands once.

“We have the same last name.”

“Yeah. It seems so.”

She looked like a chick. Cute. Jeong-yoon smiled quietly, repeating the thought he had earlier. It was clear that the junior in front of him thought of himself as a freshman. After all, being in their early twenties, they were of a similar age, so it wasn’t unreasonable for her to mistake him for a new student. Jeong-yoon didn’t feel too upset about this slight age difference.

However, it made him happy that he didn’t appear to be a “just-discharged military service student” to others. Being seen that way would have been rather sad.

‘I should probably let them know that I’m a senior before this goes any further.’

However, it was difficult to open my mouth due to the constant questions. A few more juniors gathered around the room and started talking at the same time.

But the barrage of questions made it difficult for him to find a good opportunity to speak. Several other juniors gathered around and started asking questions simultaneously.

“Aren’t you joining any clubs?”

“Do you live in Seoul? Which high school did you go to?”

“Do you commute by subway?”

“Why didn’t you come to the welcome party?”

Finally, Jeong-yoon found a chance to interject amidst the din of questions. He didn’t want to sound much like a boomer by saying something like, ‘Aren’t you showing respect?’ He just wanted to clarify his status.

Hanging his coat on the back of the chair, he seized a break in the conversation to insert his words.

“I attended the welcome party. Three years ago.”

“…”

There was a cold silence.

The girls exchanged glances, casting wary looks back and forth.

“What do we do, what do we do?” one of them said.

Now they seemed to have grasped the situation. Their response was so typical of recent high school graduates that Jeong-yoon couldn’t help but chuckle softly.

He wondered if he should say that it was okay. Or perhaps he should thank them. He was lost in this meaningless dilemma when someone opened the department door.

It was Kwon Mi-hee. She entered the room chatting with her peers, and when she spotted Jeong-yoon, her face lit up with a bright smile.