WYK 51

Chae-heon’s car was roughly leaving the apartment complex.

He needed to stop Chae-heon as he was leaving. He needed to call his name and make him stop. But filled with confusion, Jeong-yoon only managed to whisper,

“Chae-heon…”

He called softly after his car had already left the apartment.

Standing in the parking lot where the cold asphalt rose up, he kept replaying Chae-heon’s words over and over until he finally grasped their meaning and returned to reality. His shoulders trembled with the fear and sense of loss that suddenly washed over him.

He didn’t even know how he got up to his apartment. He only remembered running frantically. He couldn’t even hear his sister trying to talk to him.

Like a sleepwalker, Jeong-yoon frantically searched through his drawers and grabbed Chae-heon’s photo. Though it was hard to fully understand Chae-heon’s words, there were things he could clearly understand.

The fact that Kang Chae-heon liked him. And the deadly fact that Kang Chae-heon might give up on him.

I like you, Kang Chae-heon. I’ve always liked you.

He should have confessed while showing him the photo he took then. That he had liked him since then, no, even longer than that. That he had kept it to herself out of fear of rejection. He should have confessed like that, apologizing for hurting him through misunderstanding and ignorance.

The painful regret of having hurt Chae-heon weighed heavier than the fear of being rejected. It was time to reveal the feelings he had hidden away so cowardly. He hoped it would be possible. He wished that Kang Chae-heon hadn’t given up on him.

While pressing the elevator button with trembling hands to go to his house, he finally couldn’t wait and ran down the stairs toward the first floor. Though he was out of breath and struggling to breathe, it wasn’t just because of his frantic footsteps. He was crumbling from the terrifying and desperate fear of losing Kang Chae-heon.

He ran toward the dark outside, exhaling heavily. But as soon as he stepped out of the apartment, Jeong-yoon found himself standing still, rooted in place. Late autumn night. As he pushed his body into the dark, cold air,

“…Kang Chae-heon.”

He discovered that Kang Chae-heon, who he thought had left, was standing like a dead tree, staring at him.

A swamp-like silence flowed deeply between them. Jeong-yoon looked at Chae-heon with confused eyes, and Chae-heon, gazing back at him, faintly raised the corners of his mouth. His desolate voice rang out through the dark abyss.

“I’m sorry for getting angry.”

“…Chae-heon.”

“You can do whatever you want. Just… please, don’t push me away.”

“…”

Suddenly his heart crumbled.

His throat bobbed as he tried to swallow the surge of emotion. It wasn’t just because of his guilt toward him. What must he have thought until he came back here again? What feelings made him return? Thinking about this made his chest ache and he struggled to breathe.

Hot tears welled up under his eyes. Forcing his trembling lips closed, he slowly approached Chae-heon. Chae-heon just watched. The usually confident man was just standing there, unable to approach, his eyes full of anxiety.

Why hadn’t he realized Kang Chae-heon’s true self sooner? He had only seen Chae-heon’s shining side, never noticing such a precarious aspect. No, it was more accurate to say he had been blind like a fool. His foolish ignorance had hurt Chae-heon.

Jeong-yoon stopped in front of Chae-heon. Then he reached out and hugged him tightly. There was no hesitation. At this moment, he wanted to hold the seemingly precarious Kang Chae-heon close. And he wanted to lean on him with his whole body too.

Jeong-yoon’s moist breath clung to Chae-heon’s ear and his warm arms wrapped around his neck. Feeling Jeong-yoon’s warmth as he fell into his arms, Chae-heon stiffened. His eyes reflected strong confusion as if he couldn’t quite understand the situation.

Their hearts beat roughly where they touched. Jeong-yoon clung to Chae-heon desperately. His body was hot as if he had a slight fever.

Chae-heon raised his hand but stopped it above Jeong-yoon’s back. He seemed uncertain whether he could embrace the body before him. What did Jeong-yoon’s warmth mean? It seemed a chaotic question was racing through his mind.

Jeong-yoon gently rubbed his face against Chae-heon’s neck. The scent that always emanated from Chae-heon mixed warmly with the cold night air. Perhaps that was why the anxious beating of his heart felt a little calmer.

Jeong-yoon’s voice, trembling as if about to cry, whispered against Chae-heon’s neck.

“Chae-heon. I like you.”

“…”

“I’ve liked you since the first time I saw you. Maybe… it might even be love.”

“…Seo Jeong-yoon?”

Chae-heon’s heart was beating wildly where they touched. Though his voice calling “Seo Jeong-yoon” was calm, his trembling hands gently embracing Jeong-yoon’s back and his hot breath against his ear revealed the storm raging in his heart.

As if wanting to see Jeong-yoon’s face, Chae-heon gently tried to pull him away. But Jeong-yoon just desperately clung to his neck again. He hated even a moment’s distance from his warmth. He hated their touching temperatures separating. It couldn’t happen now.

“I don’t know what misunderstanding you have, but I went on the trip with my sister…. I lost my phone there and couldn’t contact you. I’m sorry for making you worry….”

“…”

“I’m sorry for not realizing all this time. I’m just sorry for everything. It’s all my fault….”

“…Jeong-yoon. I…”

Chae-heon swallowed hard.

“Do I still have a chance…? You haven’t come to hate me…?”

Jeong-yoon’s wavering, wet voice trembled faintly. Chae-heon’s shoulder slowly became damp with warm tears. Jeong-yoon was crying silently. He had tried to swallow the emotions that burst forth, but they had ultimately spilled over.

Chae-heon didn’t say anything. No, he couldn’t. He just stroked Jeong-yoon’s back wrapped around him, held his body tight enough to hurt, and finally gently pressed his cheek against his ear. But because he seemed to understand the meaning of these wordless actions, Jeong-yoon let out an overwhelming breath.

A cool breeze traveled down the tree-lined street, gently lifting and dropping their hair. They stood motionless, holding and being held. Their pressed bodies mixed with an indistinguishable heat.

A moment later, Chae-heon was the first to move. He gently pulled Jeong-yoon’s body away and looked at him carefully. Jeong-yoon’s tear-stained face was blurred like fog. When a teardrop clinging to his eyelash fell onto his cheek, Chae-heon’s gaze suddenly wavered strongly.

Jeong-yoon exhaled a hot breath along with subsiding sobs. Though he wanted to keep looking at Chae-heon’s face, his eyes stung so much he had to close them gently.

Following the tear tracks on Jeong-yoon’s face, Chae-heon carefully placed kisses. His lips slid down his cheek to below his jaw, lightly licking the teardrops there. Then he pressed his lips firmly back against his eyes. It was an affectionate kiss, like comfort.

“Seo Jeong-yoon. Jeong-yoon.”

“…Yes.”

“My feelings have always been love. That’s all my feelings for you have ever been. Before, and now too.”

Chae-heon’s low voice reached his along with kisses showering his face.

Choked up, Jeong-yoon could barely manage even a short “yes” in response. This moment was so unbelievably overwhelming and happy that everything felt dreamy and hazy. But Chae-heon’s warmth as he held him was too real to be just a dream. It was a blissful reality, a fantasy he had never thought would come true.

Jeong-yoon buried his face deeper into Chae-heon’s neck. In response, Chae-heon held Jeong-yoon even tighter in his arms.

He closed his aching eyes. The moon, which had been hidden by clouds, revealed itself. It was a night where distant moonlight melted hazily.

***

He waited for Chae-heon with Min-soo on the first floor of the Sangkyung Building. They had planned to go home together after his class ended.

Today, Kim Min-soo was particularly talkative. Why was he talking about games all day long? Even telling him to shut up didn’t work. He was truly an incomprehensible man.

“Seo Jeong-yoon, Seo Jeong-yoon. So, I was lucky enough to get that item! And it can be equipped together with the paid item I bought. Isn’t that awesome?”

“Yeah. Awesome.”

“It can even pierce through dragon scale shields. No joke. So I’ve been using potions to attack and I’ve leveled up tons now.”

“Is that so.”

“They say it sometimes appears near the Mountain of Demons, but I found it near the beach, you know? I was really lucky.”

“…”

Jeong-yoon stared at Min-soo’s face with a gentle smile. Even though he was obviously giving half-hearted responses, Min-soo kept talking by himself.

Right now, Jeong-yoon’s mind was full of Chae-heon. Thinking of Chae-heon made him keep smiling, which led to him giving Min-soo endlessly benevolent smiles. Meanwhile, Min-soo was still bragging about his items. He wasn’t even particularly envious right now.

Jeong-yoon silently took out his wallet and searched through it. He didn’t want to be disturbed anymore while struggling in these waves of happiness. He took out two bills and handed them to Min-soo, saying,

“Hey. I’ll give you 2,000 won if you’ll close your mouth for a bit? I have something I want to quietly be happy about right now.”

“What’s this? Give me 3,000 won.”

“Alright, our Min-soo. Here you go.”

He took out another 1,000 won bill from his wallet and 300 won from his pocket and handed it over. Min-soo jingled the 300 won as he put it in his pocket.

“Sales tax?”

“Yeah. VAT 10% extra.”

With that pointless conversation ended, Min-soo left saying he’d buy coffee. Finally, peaceful silence flowed.

Jeong-yoon smiled again. His expression was uncontrollably relaxed. He pressed down his rising cheekbones while meaninglessly rubbing the table.

Yesterday, Kang Chae-heon said he liked him. Said he liked and loved him more than anyone. Goodness. Under the high moon, he said that while holding him tight.

Yesterday, while Jeong-yoon was hugging Chae-heon, he soon returned to reality and gently pulled away from him. Though they were lucky no one passed by during their melodramatic moment, given the location, it was obvious someone would discover them if they continued.

That would mean their precious overwhelming moment would be exposed to others. He didn’t want that. Their happiness was solely their own. It was a precious moment he didn’t want to share with anyone.

They sat on the bench holding hands for a long while before parting near midnight. Jeong-yoon secretly hoped to go to Chae-heon’s house. But Chae-heon kissed his forehead and said:

‘You must be tired, rest. I’ll come pick you up tomorrow.’

Seeing Chae-heon say that Jeong-yoon couldn’t bring himself to say he wanted to go to his house. Jeong-yoon felt like he’d be the only pervert.

Anyway, now he and Chae-heon were lovers. Their feelings had connected, and they’d confessed their love. It wasn’t a dream or fantasy. They’d really become that kind of relationship.

Jeong-yoon nibbled his lips with his head down, feeling ticklish inside. Then he lifted his head, letting out an overwhelming breath mixed with laughter. At some point, Min-soo had returned with coffee and was staring at him questioningly while jingling his iced cup.

“Hey.”

“What?”

“Did you get a girlfriend or something?”

Jeong-yoon was startled, his shoulders jumping as he moved back. Min-soo grinned and suddenly sat down next to Jeong-yoon. Min-soo’s arm casually draped over Jeong-yoon’s shoulder. The whispering in his ear was an unwelcome addition.

“You called me in the middle of the night saying you’d use your body recklessly… Did you get someone that way? Tell me. Don’t be shy.”

“…”

“Did you seduce them with that pretty face? I thought you were innocent, but you’re quite something, huh?”

Jeong-yoon didn’t answer. Min-soo seemed quite tactless but always grasped the key points sharply. It was the same now. Though he hadn’t gotten Chae-heon by using his body, he had gotten him, so it was half true. Though not a girlfriend, he had gotten Chae-heon, who was as pretty and cool as any girlfriend. That’s why he was floating around all day, frolicking in fields of happiness.

Interpreting Jeong-yoon’s silence as affirmation, Min-soo raised the corner of his mouth.

“Finally some sunshine coming into our Jeong-yoon’s life, huh?”

“…Yeah.”

Jeong-yoon touched his reddening ears and nodded. If he looked in a mirror now, he’d probably see a young person with a foolishly relaxed expression and flushed face. But that was fine. If Min-soo was congratulating him, he should accept the congratulations. This was truly something worth celebrating.

Just as Jeong-yoon was nodding with a silly grin and Min-soo was nodding along with him, a sinister voice came from behind.

“Seo Jeong-yoon.”

It was Chae-heon. His voice was darkly subdued.

Startled, Jeong-yoon almost jumped up from his chair. Calming his pounding heart, he turned around slowly, and sure enough, Chae-heon was standing there with a crooked posture.

‘How does he always appear suddenly whenever I think about him? It’s getting remarkable now.’

Jeong-yoon smiled very brightly at Chae-heon.

“You’re here?”

It was an unconditional welcome. But Chae-heon just strode over, skipping the greeting. Standing menacingly right in front of Jeong-yoon, he tilted his head slightly.

“What are you doing?”

“Huh?”

“I asked what you’re doing.”

“Waiting for you.”

Jeong-yoon looked up at Chae-heon blankly. Was it his imagination? For no reason, Chae-heon seemed very angry. But despite that, the corners of his mouth kept rising thoughtlessly. Just seeing his face made him happy. But feeling that smiling in this atmosphere wouldn’t be appropriate, he bit his lip firmly.

Min-soo, who had been watching them, unwrapped his arm from Jeong-yoon and waved his hand at Chae-heon.

“Hey. Why are you cornering him like that? You’re scaring Jeong-yoon. Did you two fight?”

I’m not scared though. I’m just happy. Jeong-yoon thought this while still looking up at Chae-heon, and Chae-heon turned his gaze to look down at Min-soo quietly. Unlike his usual kind self, his expression was quite cold and stern. Min-soo pressed his lips together and muttered while avoiding his gaze.

“What the… geez. Now I’m scared too. This hurts my pride…”

Jeong-yoon chuckled at Min-soo’s words and shrugged his shoulders to shake him off. Only then did Min-soo stand up and gather his things from the table.

“Anyway, since you two met up, I’ll go. You’re not really fighting, right? Kang Chae-heon. Don’t hit him, use words. Words, okay? Well, see you both later.”

“Yeah. Take care.”

Jeong-yoon waved lightly at Min-soo’s joking farewell. Chae-heon didn’t respond. Soon Min-soo turned and left. Jeong-yoon watched Min-soo’s retreating figure before turning to look up at his side. Chae-heon was still looking at him with a terrifying expression. That face looked like it was trying hard to suppress rising emotions.

Jeong-yoon smiled brightly again. He wasn’t scared since he hadn’t done anything wrong. Why did his slightly angry face look so sparklingly handsome? His smile was radiant, but this hardened expression was also cool. It matched his uniquely chilly atmosphere very well.

Chae-heon irritably rubbed his furrowed brow before speaking.

“I always feel this, but aren’t you too casual with Kim Min-soo?”

“Min-soo and me?”

“Yes. You and Kim Min-soo.”

“Really? Then I won’t be anymore.”

Jeong-yoon answered right away. Of course, all he and Min-soo did was link arms and whisper in each other’s ears. But if Chae-heon was uncomfortable with it, wouldn’t it be right to stop? He should listen when his boyfriend asks.

Boyfriend. Just mentally repeating that word made him smile happily again.

Seeing Jeong-yoon’s intuitive response without any hesitation, Chae-heon stared at him blankly before shaking his head as if in disbelief. Even though he tried to be angry, seeing Jeong-yoon’s unconditionally positive expression made it impossible.

Jeong-yoon got up and started packing his things, still smiling.

“Chae-heon, did you eat dinner? You haven’t, right? Should I treat you?”

“…No, I’ll treat you.”

“Okay. Anything is fine.”

“…”

Chae-heon laughed again in disbelief and started walking with his arm around Jeong-yoon’s shoulder. Only then did Jeong-yoon start trying to control his expression.

‘My expression must be ridiculous right now.’

It must be melting like soft ice cream in midsummer. But Jeong-yoon didn’t care. Everything was perfect.