ASIAH 8

It got to the point where one day, even Eunha noona said this to me.

“I don’t know what’s going on, but you should all get along with your classmates. They say it’s hard to make true friends after high school, but that’s not us. Even the sunbaes said all their best friends who they can really talk to are from the Metal Craft department. It’s the same for me.”

“Unnie, what about me?”

A woman who had been resting her chin on the back of a chair cut in reproachfully. From the moment I entered the department office, she had been playing around, straddling a four-legged chair like a hobby horse with her legs spread wide.

“In the grand scheme of things, you’re practically in our department too. You’re an art college alumnus.”

In the grand scheme of things? As if sensing my curiosity, Eunha noona made a belated introduction.

“Is this the first time Seonhee and Yoon are meeting? This is Ryu Seonhee, a painting major. And this is our first-year, Jooyoon.”

“…Is your name just one syllable?”

“Hello.”

I thought I’d heard that name somewhere before, and it must be the art college student that Hyun Jaekyung and the hipster were talking about. The hipster had called her Snow White and Ice Princess, but she gave off more of a Winter General vibe than a princess. That was the case even though she had choppy bangs, which could have given her a cute image.

Eunha noona, seemingly oblivious to Ryu Seonhee-ssi’s dead-fish eyes, even told me how they became friends.

“A lot of kids from our department take art college classes, you know. I got to know her face while auditing a liberal arts class over there, and the next semester she contacted me saying she wanted to take a class in our department. We’ve been close ever since. But you come over to play way too often. Don’t you hang out with your classmates? What about your assignments?”

“I don’t know, I just can’t stand the sight of any of them and I’m in a rebellious phase. I’m thinking of punching a hole in my canvas and then just bullshitting my way through it.”

“A hundred people have probably already done that… Are you having a mid-life crisis in your twenties?”

“Hah… I don’t knooow.”

“It’s always the talented ones who are like this.”

“Buy me a meal to console me. You said all the professors are out today, right?”

“Yeah, a moment of freedom. Yoon, you want to eat with us too? Jaekyung is coming soon.”

I had no desire to eat with someone I had just met… especially a noona from another department that the hipster liked. So I was about to refuse, but Ryu Seonhee-ssi suddenly shot up from her seat. She was so tall that she came almost up to my nose, and I was a little startled and took a step back. Now that I saw her, she seemed better suited to be a volleyball player than an art student.

“Our friend here must be busy with his assignments. It would be uncomfortable to eat with us noonas, right?”

“…Yes?”

“First-years always have a hard time adjusting. If you want to change your major, I can give you some advice.”

“Yes… Yeees?”

“See you later. Go find that Jaekyung or whatever guy and eat with him.”

I was pushed out of the department office in a daze. When I came to my senses, I even had two 10,000 won bills in my hand. And changing my major? When I was just starting to find my major interesting?

After making it to the lobby, I was about to mull over this absurdity a little longer when I ran into Hyun Jaekyung, who was returning from an errand. I reflexively held out one of the 10,000 won bills.

“Um… I got money for a meal.”

“What?”

“She told me to eat with you, but we’re not exactly the type to eat a meal together.”

“Who gave you the money?”

“Ryu Seonhee noona.”

“How do you know her?”

What a strange question. Is there a law that says I can’t know someone you know? But, as always, I managed to snark internally while answering dryly.

“She seemed close with Eunha noona.”

“So, our expensive Jooyoon’s taste in women is Ryu Seonhee-ssi? Or the even older TA?”

As he said that, Hyun Jaekyung crumpled the 10,000 won bill and stuffed it into the upper pocket of my shirt. And hearing him go on about women, the three words ‘three some’ suddenly popped into my head.

Hyun Jaekyung’s harem… the attention-seeking Hyun Jaekyung who carries STDs like a sewer rat carrying the bubonic plague… along with other such accusatory speculations. So I naturally found myself staring at his lower body. It was a part of someone else’s body I had never been conscious of before, but it felt like a game element that would drain my HP if I touched it.

“……”

Does he think everyone lives with only that one thing on their mind, like someone I know?

When I didn’t react, Hyun Jaekyung took out the crumpled bill again and, ever so carefully, unfolded it. Then, he started tapping my cheek with it. The power of a single bill was like that of a feather. But the fact that the perpetrator was Hyun Jaekyung, and the fact that I had somehow imagined this scene from the perspective of a non-existent third party, made me feel quite disgusting.

Where did this bastard learn such a deliberate and dramatic gesture? And how many germs are on a banknote? Now that it had touched his filthy hands, it was even tainted.

“Yoon-ah—you go eat a lot of food. You need to eat and grow taller.”

But even when I was the one who should be getting angry, it was Hyun Jaekyung who was acting all offended and throwing a fit. It was also unpleasant how he kept using that cutesy nickname that people from his region supposedly never use. Judging by his previous comments about being gay and other remarks, Hyun Jaekyung seemed to be steeped in machismo.

His methods of getting a rise out of me or establishing his own dominance were all childish. That’s probably why he just mentioned my height. Because the only thing I have over him is my height, so he picks on that. He said he likes westerns; the guy is practically from Gyeongsangnam-do, Texas City.

And there’s a misunderstanding. Even native Seoulites are different depending on their personality, and the only people who have ever called me ‘Yoon-ah’ were my dad and some girls. Right now, it’s just Juri sunbae and Eunha noona.

Anyway, I’ve had enough. I also wish everyone would stop asking me, who has no interest, about Hyun Jaekyung’s business. In the end, I asked a question I had no real intention of asking.

“Are you angry?”

“Huh?”

“Are you angry at me?”

This was to get a clear grasp of Hyun Jaekyung’s recent shitty situation; I wasn’t really curious. At the question, which wasn’t even an interrogation, Hyun Jaekyung’s eyes shifted anxiously before landing at my feet.

“Why would I be?”

Exactly. But I didn’t want to back down here.

“I guess you just like making people feel stupid on your own?”

“Who made who feel stupid? That wasn’t me, it was…”

“Why do you make people ask me about your business? You were so damn clingy that everyone got the wrong idea. We’re not friends or anything, yet it’s so awkward.”

“……”

“I get that you’re a delinquent who puts a lot of effort into pissing people off, okay? …I get it, but leave me out of it. It feels disgusting.”

Hyun Jaekyung, who had been chattering away and sticking his nose in everywhere, clammed up completely. Seeing him like that, I felt like I had gained the upper hand and became triumphant.

“You asked about my type of woman, right? I don’t know about that, but I’m sure about my type of man I hate.”

It might sound like an excuse, but I’m not usually the type of person who intentionally says mean things to others. It’s just that a lot had built up against Hyun Jaekyung in a short period of time. It may sound a bit dramatic, but Hyun Jaekyung made me this way.

“I can’t stand guys like you.”

Alright, I’ve knocked him down, now all that’s left is the K.O. As if I couldn’t miss this rare opportunity, I suddenly became anxious. I had to make the usually obnoxious Hyun Jaekyung realize that I’m not an easy target. As I reminded myself of that, I was able to finish what I was going to say perfectly.

“Even if you were the exact same person but just a different gender, I would still hate you.”

And I said it while looking him straight in the eye.

“……”

For a while, a silence so complete that not even a mouse would scurry by flowed between us.

Did I overdo it? Was this my character? Shouldn’t I be more taciturn? This is all Hyun Jaekyung’s fault…. Then, unusually for Hyun Jaekyung, a very late reply came.

“Me, me too… I wouldn’t do it with you even if they paid me.”

He was quite venomous, as if he had been gathering his energy while he was quiet. But I hadn’t been implying anything sexual. It’s just like a guy with only that on his mind.

“Oh, thanks. We finally have one thing we agree on.”

As soon as I said that, Hyun Jaekyung forcefully threw the bill he had been holding at my face. He probably did it to make me feel bad, but it fluttered down lazily, oblivious to Hyun Jaekyung’s feelings.

Try digging up the ground, see if 10,000 won comes out. Jaekyung’s parents, I think you’ve failed at raising your child.

After picking up the money, I saw the back of his head already far in the distance. Was he pissed? Wouldn’t he learn to be considerate only after getting a little angry because of someone else? That’s what I’m hoping for. Though I don’t know why I have to be the one to teach a grown man that.

As I tried to justify my impulsive act, the back of my neck kept feeling chilly. No matter that the other party was Hyun Jaekyung and it was an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, maybe it was because I had acted so uncharacteristically obnoxious. The emotional stimulation was too strong for me, who was used to a calm daily life.

How does Hyun Jaekyung do this kind of thing as naturally as breathing? I really am a good guy who is suited to living in a corner, enjoying small happinesses. So I will probably never be able to understand him.

The next day, I stopped by the department office to take care of some paperwork, but Hyun Jaekyung wasn’t there. I must have been looking around without realizing it, because Eunha noona explained as if she had read my mind.

“They say Jaekyung is sick.”

“He’s sick?”

It must be a hangover. He might fool the kind Eunha noona, but he can’t fool me.

“He was in a double room in the dorm, but his roommate had personal issues, so he’s been alone all semester… At the time, he said he was glad to have the room to himself, but it’s lonely to be sick alone. You should go visit him.”

Did that guy’s roommate exist when I delivered the drunk Hyun Jaekyung to the dorm? I couldn’t remember well. This isn’t important.

“…Why me?”

“Aren’t you the closest one to Jaekyung? You guys are always together, even cleaning, don’t be so shy.”

That trash bastard Hyun Jaekyung! I was the only one cleaning while he just watched, so how did he spin it to make it sound like we were doing volunteer work together? I had no intention of visiting that guy’s sickbed, but I ended up nodding just to get out of the situation.

“Good thinking! Can you give this to Jaekyung?”

Eunha noona even handed me a small jar of citron tea. She told me his dorm room number in case he was too sick to answer his phone, but miserably, I already knew which building and room number that bastard lived in.

I had carried him there so many times in March that the route was ingrained in me. Back then, Hyun Jaekyung not only used me as a shuttle to the dorms, but he was also desperate to get me to have even one drink. But would a human being really go that far just to bully someone?

Well, in the past, there must have been farmers who tried to feed the plowing ox a little something extra. I know it’s a weird analogy even as I think it. I just really didn’t want to go.