COAC 38

He tried to pick up a piece of chicken from the table, but his chopsticks missed and wandered in the air several times as if he couldn’t focus. The chicken he finally managed to pick up soon fell onto Seo Jeong’s clothes.

“Ah.”

As Seo Jeong stared blankly down at his clothes, Kim Chayeon, who was sitting next to him, put a napkin in his hand.

“Oh, thanks. My chopstick skills are really off today for some reason. How strange.”

Strange, my foot. It’s because you’re drunk. Watching Seo Jeong blink his eyes slowly, Do Hyeonjun answered only in his thoughts.

“Anyway, what I want to say is. Haven’t you two been a bit awkward lately? It’s hard to pinpoint exactly what it is.”

Do Hyeonjun, who had been pouring a drink into an empty glass, flinched. Cold sweat beaded on the back of his neck.

“You don’t seem to eat together, and you don’t seem to talk much either. Did you two have a fight? You’re strangely distant, like people who dated and then broke up.”

“Don’t say such ridiculous things.”

Kim Chayeon answered curtly. His voice was so sharp that Seo Jeong was at a loss for words.

“Hey. Why are you so serious about a joke.”

Do Hyeonjun read the look in Seo Jeong’s eyes that said, ‘What’s with him?’ and shrugged. It seemed that now, even a joke involving him was unwelcome. Or maybe he didn’t want to leave any room for misunderstanding with Seo Jeong. Whatever the reason, their relationship no longer had room for even a single joke.

“I know, right. That’s a reaction that could make a person feel bad.”

He let out a sliver of his true feelings disguised as a joke, but what came back was complete disregard.

As expected, Seo Jeong was the first to pass out. It was understandable that he would be tired, as he had talked more than usual and had over-the-top reactions in an attempt to smooth over the slightly awkward atmosphere. Kim Chayeon took his own jacket and covered Seo Jeong, who had fallen asleep as if collapsing onto the floor.

“The floor is hard, just lay him down on my bed.”

“Just leave him. He might wake up if we try to move him. He worked hard all night on his assignment, we should let him sleep for a bit.”

Every action he took toward the sleeping Seo Jeong was imbued with a careful warmth. From the gentle way he covered him with the jacket, to his slightly lowered voice, to how he even spared his movements lest he wake him up.

He had told himself countless times that he should be used to it by now, but it was no use. The only thing he got used to was the pain; his heart was left in tatters every single time, helplessly. What was so sickening was not this situation, but his own feelings that still flowed as they pleased, in spite of it all. If you get dumped, you should just get over it cleanly. Why was he dragging it out like this?

Do Hyeonjun downed the full glass of soju in one gulp, then another. Kim Chayeon, who would normally stop at a reasonable point to take care of Seo Jeong, also emptied his glass today, matching Do Hyeonjun’s pace. Several minutes passed with them only pouring alcohol without eating a single snack. Perhaps because his mind was in a turmoil, the alcohol was having little effect on him today.

“At least eat some beef jerky. You’ll ruin your stomach.”

“Mr. Kim Chayeon, you’re also just chugging straight soju, you know.”

Receiving Kim Chayeon’s concern felt so much like the old days when they were close that something surged up inside him.

“Can’t drink anymore? Declaring your surrender?”

Do Hyeonjun deliberately provoked him playfully. Kim Chayeon tilted the green bottle and filled the glass to the brim, then immediately emptied it.

“Do Hyeonjun. Have you ever seen me drunk?”

“You’ve never seen my drunken habits either, you know.”

Kim Chayeon had probably never let himself go, not even once, in order to stay by Seo Jeong’s side. And Do Hyeonjun never drank to the end, afraid that the moment he lost his senses, the feelings he had suppressed so tightly would be revealed. Because he didn’t want to commit the terrifying act of a drunken confession.

A contest that was not a contest continued in silence. Empty soju glasses moved quickly back and forth across the table. Without even the clink of a toast, only the act of downing alcohol was repeated. The air in the room grew heavy, it was hard to tell if it was from the alcohol or from their emotions. In the end, it was Kim Chayeon who crumbled first.

He leaned sideways, using the sofa as a backrest, and let out ragged breaths.

“Do Hyeonjun. You tough bastard…”

“Don’t you ever mess with your hyung-nim again.”

Smiling faintly, he tossed a bottle of water to Kim Chayeon. His drunken hands fumbled in the air, unable to open the cap properly. He took the water bottle from him, who was uncharacteristically lax, opened the cap, and handed it back. Ugh. Barely able to lift his head to drink, almost more than half of the water spilled down his front.

“Are you sleeping?”

He spoke after staring blankly at the ceiling. At some point, Kim Chayeon’s eyes had closed. The collar of his shirt, buttoned up to his neck, looked strangely suffocating. He would be uncomfortable sleeping like that. But he couldn’t bring himself to unbutton the shirt.

He had gone to wash his face to sober up and had just come out. Kim Chayeon’s body, which had been leaning precariously against the sofa, tilted. Just before his head hit the floor, Do Hyeonjun reflexively ran and caught him as he collapsed.

Whoosh, amidst the strong smell of alcohol, he could clearly feel a soft body scent. At a much closer distance, the breath Kim Chayeon exhaled grazed his cheek precariously. The intoxication that hadn’t come even after drinking nearly three bottles rushed over him all at once, as if it had been waiting.

Get a grip. Do Hyeonjun.

Biting the inside of his lip, he carefully laid Kim Chayeon down on the floor. It was still a bit chilly to sleep without a blanket. Kim Chayeon’s jacket was draped over Seo Jeong, who was sleeping soundly a good distance away.

He brought a blanket from his room and covered Kim Chayeon, who was lying on his side on the floor. It was hard to tear his gaze away from the densely packed eyelashes at the ends of his rounded eyelids.

He didn’t have the confidence to sleep in the same space, so he decided he should go to his room. The moment he straightened his half-bent body, his wrist was gripped firmly. Kim Chayeon, who he thought was asleep, had grabbed him.

“Hyeonjun.”

Kim Chayeon called his name affectionately.

“Break the imprinting.”

With his eyes still closed, letting the eyelashes he had been anxiously stealing glances at hang long, he commanded. His voice, with no trace of drunkenness, was unwavering and cold. Do Hyeonjun did not move. To be precise, he could not move.

“…Sorry.”

After finally spitting out the single word of apology he had been suppressing for so long, he fled into his room. He didn’t want to see Kim Chayeon’s expression. With his back to the door, he slowly slid down into a sitting position.

“Haa.”

His stomach churned.

At the sound of the alarm blaring in his ears, Do Hyeonjun fumbled around his pillow. He pressed the screen to turn off the alarm, but the sound continued to ring. Ugh. He let out a groan and pushed himself up. His eyes were so swollen that he couldn’t open them properly. It was a terrible hangover, as if someone was hammering his head from the inside.

When he left the room pressing on his temples, Do Hyeonjun was momentarily at a loss for words. The living room, which had been a mess with empty liquor bottles, snacks, and leftover chicken, was spotlessly clean, as if by magic. Since Seo Jeong was sleeping curled up on the sofa, Kim Chayeon must have cleaned up.

The alarm that was still ringing was Seo Jeong’s. He turned off the notification for Seo Jeong, who was dead to the world. The front door opened and Kim Chayeon came in, holding a plastic bag. Didn’t he also drink nearly five bottles by himself? Why is he so fine?

“It’s the first time I’ve ever drunk until the end.”

Kim Chayeon said something ambiguous, making it unclear whether he had actually been drunk or not. He was about to ask, but then concluded that whether he was drunk or not, the words ‘break the imprinting’ must have been sincere. He didn’t have the confidence to face Kim Chayeon’s resolve again just yet. No, it wasn’t ‘just yet,’ it was probably that he still lacked the confidence. He muttered to himself dejectedly before opening his mouth.

“Where have you been so early in the morning?”

Kim Chayeon took out bean sprouts, tofu, and green onions from the bag. Among the vegetables, a can of a sports drink caught his eye. That was the brand of drink Do Hyeonjun always looked for the day after drinking. Could it be…

“I went to the mart. Jeong likes hangover soup.”

Of course not. It seemed he had bought it as an extra while he was out buying ingredients for the hangover soup. It was a moment where his hope of ‘could it be’ became pointless. He knew it wasn’t for him, but he couldn’t completely push away that tiny possibility. Even if his head understood perfectly, his heart turned first toward what it wanted to believe.

“Such devotion.”

He didn’t mean to be sarcastic, but the words slipped out. Kim Chayeon stopped tearing open the bean sprout package and looked at him.

“Because I decided to. For Jeong… I have to be that way.”

His voice sank coldly, as if he had touched a raw nerve.

“Right. I get that he’s special, so just make the hangover soup. Seo Jeong and I have a major class for second period today. We have to leave early.”

He forced the corners of his mouth up and spat out the words like an excuse. Kim Chayeon, who had paused for a moment, headed to the sink with the ingredients.

“Can I drink the sports drink?”

“Do what you want.”

He watched Kim Chayeon, who answered without looking back, and then chugged the drink. Whether it was an extra or not, it meant he thought of me.

Around the time the bean sprout soup was almost done, he woke Seo Jeong up. Seo Jeong ruffled his messy, bird’s nest hair and looked back and forth between the two of them.

“I was the one who drank the least, the one who fell asleep the fastest, and the one who slept the most soundly, but why do I look the most tired? Why do you two look exactly the same as usual?”

“The one who’s fine is Kim Chayeon. I’m a mess. My eyes are super swollen too.”

Seeing Do Hyeonjun point to himself, Seo Jeong let out a disbelieving laugh, “Ha.”