FRWD Ch 10

I like Go Yehan.

Even after the day he cleanly admitted it, Haseong’s world continued to turn just as it always had. Every time he went to work, he would run down the slope as if he were rolling to squeeze his body into a packed bus, and when lunchtime came, a message would arrive from Yehan, who had clearly just woken up around that time, and then he would stop in the middle of his meal, busy replying with his face buried in his phone.

As for minor changes, there were only things like the evenings getting a little earlier, Yehan’s drama filming schedule, which had seemed to be postponed, was slowly taking a more concrete shape for around mid-November, and that accordingly, Hyeongseok was also away from the studio more often for things like meetings with the drama director or the OST production company.

The fact that he worked a second job on Fridays and Saturdays also remained unchanged. Haseong, who woke up late on Saturday morning, checked the clock and continued the composition work he had done the previous day, and then, around the time the sun began to dim, he left and walked toward the live club. The thought that the week would be over after just this one day made his steps feel light.

However, his condition was not very good because a strangely sharp stomachache had been persisting lately. Thanks to that, he had no appetite at all and had skipped dinner today as well.

He considered going to the hospital, but it was a hassle to go and he did not really have the time. Today too, as soon as he got to work, the thought of the hospital was immediately forgotten amidst the rushing crowd, and he ran around without a moment’s rest. He noticed Yehan had arrived in the middle of it all, but he was so busy he did not even have a moment to go to his seat, so he just gave a nod and moved on.

‘It’s been a really long time since I last saw him.’

Since this was the first time they were meeting after seeing the night view together last week, his feeling of disappointment was also great. Yehan, perhaps being serious when he said they should take a week off without having relations, had gone home late that night. Without doing anything at all. The light kiss they shared just before parting was the entirety of the skinship they had that day.

The next day, he said something had suddenly come up and did not show his face for the entire Chuseok holiday. After the holiday ended, Haseong himself became busy, so they only kept in touch through messages. Thanks to that, his body was able to rest for nearly two weeks, but…. It was not entirely a good thing.

He missed Yehan, his stomach, which he thought would get better if he took a break from sex, continued to be uncomfortable, he felt lonely being by himself after a long time, and all sorts of stray thoughts kept popping into his head….

In any case, it was a period that brought no benefits whatsoever, aside from his stamina recovering slightly. That was why Haseong moved even more busily as soon as the business for the night was over. He had just confirmed with a sideways glance that Yehan and Hyeongseok were stepping out to smoke.

He wanted to see him quickly. He wanted to finish the greeting he had not been able to give properly earlier, and he wanted to ask if he had a good Chuseok, and what kind of work had made him so busy.

As Haseong took excited steps and opened the back door, the murmur of familiar voices immediately began to reach his ears. With their backs to the door, Yehan and Hyeongseok were continuing their conversation in a lower tone than usual.

At that, Haseong stopped in his tracks without realizing it. It was because the atmosphere felt somewhat strange to just call out to Yehan. Hyeongseok, who was roughly scratching the back of his head while letting the cigarette in his other hand burn bright red without smoking it, and Yehan, who exuded a cool aura. Anyone could see this was no ordinary atmosphere.

“What am I supposed to do when he won’t listen no matter how many times I tell him you can’t come? And you know he doesn’t have much time left to live….”

“That’s none of my business. Why do you think I’m doing charity work for you without taking a single penny for rent?”

“…….”

“Let’s just, do a good job. Huh? You have to give as much as you receive for it to be worth it.”

“…I’m sorry.”

Ah, I feel like I should not be hearing this. Although I have already heard a little…. It was just when Haseong, who had unintentionally witnessed the serious atmosphere, was about to hurry away. The toe of Haseong’s shoe, as he took a step, bumped against the steel door, making a dull noise.

It was a small sound that could have been buried by the noise of cars, but the sharp-eared Yehan did not miss it and turned around.

“Haseong ssi?”

Now that his name had been called, he could not ignore them. Haseong slickly turned only his neck and bowed his head to them, who had surprised looks in their eyes.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t know you were talking. I’ll go back inside.”

Haseong’s effort to close the door while putting on the most innocent expression possible, as if he had not heard anything, failed. Yehan, who strode over in just a few steps with his long legs, wrapped an arm around his shoulder and blocked his retreat.

“We’re done talking. Have you been well? I haven’t seen your face once since we parted last week.”

Contrary to the affectionate voice asking how he was, a strong grip was applied to his shoulder. Presently, Haseong’s entire body was spun around without his feet even leaving the ground. Yehan, who had easily turned the tall man around by grabbing only his shoulder, had his usual pretty, smiling face. Haseong looked at that face and managed to pull up the corners of his mouth, however awkwardly.

“Ye…es. Hyung, did the work you said you were busy with finish well?”

“For the most part. But wait a moment. Why have you lost so much weight?”

“Ah, that’s.”

Before he could even answer, both of his cheeks were caught in one of Yehan’s hands. His vision grew dizzy as Yehan continuously kneaded his cheeks with his fingers and turned his head from side to side.

Knowing that it would become a hassle if he answered truthfully, ‘I had no appetite so I’ve barely been eating,’ Haseong chose his words carefully even as his lips puckered like a goldfish.

“I guess I just lost weight because of the change in seasons.”

“What does the change in seasons have to do with losing weight.”

“Right. I’ve heard of catching a cold, but this is the first I’m hearing about losing weight. Now that I look, you really have lost weight.”

Hyeongseok, who had approached at some point, added his own words. Yehan, who had been stroking his cheeks, lowered his hand to weakly grip his chin and frowned.

“Nothing’s wrong, is there?”

It was obvious from the way his hand swept along his jawline that he was trying to gauge how much weight had been lost. Only after he made excuses several times that truly nothing was wrong and that he had not even known he had lost weight did the grip on his chin loosen.

Still, Yehan wore a displeased expression. His gaze cast down crookedly, he tickled Haseong’s chin.

“You look incredibly handsome because your jawline is more prominent, but it’s a problem if you get any more handsome than this.”

“Seriously, please stop teasing me.”

“It’s true. I saw a customer trying to get your number earlier.”

“…….”

When could he have possibly seen that. Of all things, for Yehan to have witnessed that brief, fleeting moment that lasted for about 30 seconds in front of the counter and ended with him politely refusing. Feeling sheepish, Haseong bit his lip.

“You refused well though. You always have an unexpectedly different side to you.”

All he had done was not take the offered phone and say he was sorry as he stepped back. No matter how much he hesitated and was shy around strangers, he could at least do this much. Wouldn’t even an elementary school student, taught to be wary of strangers, be able to do this? That customer also laughed and said he was just joking around before immediately paying and leaving.

So, to be told he was good at refusing was a bit of a contradiction, but Haseong kept his foolish lips pressed into a straight line and nodded his head. At that, Yehan naturally wrapped an arm around his neck.

“It’s getting chilly, let’s go inside. You too, Hyeongseok. You said you had something to show me.”

“Aah, right. Hey, Haseong, are there any customers left in the hall?”

“No. Noona cleared the last table.”

When he added that Moyeon had left early, saying she had plans, Hyeongseok clapped his hands together with a 짝.

“Perfect. Hey, since there’s no one to recognize you and make a fuss, take this chance to warm up your hands and play something before you go.”

“Play what.”

“A fretless bass. A friend asked me to look after it while he’s overseas. When I thought of a fretless, you immediately came to mind.”

“Whatever…. It’s been over 10 years since I even touched a bass.”

“But you still know how to play. For me, playing the bass is just plucking the strings a few times, so it’s better for the instrument if you play it rather than me.”

Hyung plays the bass? Haseong’s eyes widened, as this was the first he had ever heard of it.

“A fretless bass? Hyung, you know how to play the bass too?”

“I just learned a little a long time ago.”

A lie. How could someone who only learned a little handle a fretless bass. As he stood there with his mouth agape, staring blankly at Yehan, Hyeongseok laughed heartily and patted his back.

“Haseong, you want to try? Have you ever handled a fretless?”

“I have one at home, but….”

“Then Haseong ssi can do it. It’ll be a chance to see Haseong ssi play the bass after a long time. I’m not going to play.”

Yehan also smiled brightly and guided Haseong to the stage. Finding himself seated under a pin spotlight like a solitary musician, Haseong swept his hand over the instrument’s cold body and fell into thought.

He could get a rough feel for it just by touching it. It was an expensive, fine instrument. It was well-maintained, and the strings, gleaming with a glossy sheen, seemed to have been replaced recently. He discreetly checked the model name and, as expected, it was a rare model from a good manufacturer. For a bassist, when an instrument like this came into their possession, it was only natural to want to play it.

But today.

“…I want to see you play the bass too, hyung.”

The voice that came out after a long hesitation flowed out slowly.

Yehan had told him time and again that he became his fan because he looked cool playing the bass. Although he himself did not know exactly how he looked cool when he played. That was why he was even more curious. How cool Yehan would look playing the bass.

“When you said you learned an instrument, I thought it was something like the violin or cello. Because things like that suit you well, hyung…. Not that the bass doesn’t suit you. I just never imagined you’d know how to play the bass….”

With his desire to see him play taking precedence, his words once again became long and tangled like a skein of yarn. Just as his voice trailed off in self-reproach, a hearty laugh fortunately cut in.

“Hey, hey, you’re going to run out of breath. Why are there so many side comments attached to just saying you want to see him play the bass? And your guess is right. This guy plays the cello too. He’s also good at the piano.”

“Don’t talk nonsense. It’s been ages since I quit all that.”

Yehan replied curtly but walked right up to the front of the stage. Thus, creating distance between himself and Hyeongseok, he stood with the rather high stage between them and looked up at Haseong, asking.

“Do you want to see me play the bass that badly?”

From above, his long eyelashes cast a shadow on Yehan’s face like an awning. Charmed by it, Haseong blankly nodded his chin up and down, and the corners of Yehan’s eyes stretched even longer.

“But I like watching you play, Haseong ssi, I don’t really like playing myself. What should we do?”

“Then I guess there’s no choice, but….”

What could be done if he himself did not want to do it. His head thought rationally, but his heart did not seem to agree, as a dejected voice escaped him without him realizing. Perhaps finding the contrast between his answer and his voice amusing, Yehan let out a small chuckle.

“At times like this, you’re not supposed to back down right away, you have to coax them. To whet the other person’s appetite.”

“How?”

“For example.”

He leaped onto the stage and whispered softly, their faces so close their noses could brush against each other.

“By whining, ‘Hyung-ah, I’ll suck you off today, so can’t you show me you playing the bass?’”

The content, the voice, the expression. Not a single thing was not provocative. Even the presence of Hyeongseok below the stage. From the way he was sitting listlessly and just shaking his leg, Hyeongseok seemed not to have heard, but sharing such a secret conversation in a place with another person (and his employer at that) was in itself an unbearable thing.

Besides, it was so big it would not even fit in his mouth, so what, what was he supposed to do…. Just the thought of it was dizzying, and his body naturally pulled back. Was it an expression of his desire to escape? Haseong, still seated on the stool, began to slowly push his feet against the stage floor to move away from Yehan.

But he could not move even five steps before the back of the stool was blocked by Yehan’s hand, and his escape came to an end.

“I’m kidding. I find my heart gets weak just from looking at your face, Haseong ssi.”

Yehan took the bass Haseong was holding and gestured with his eyes. Haseong quickly stood up and offered his seat. Seated on the stool, Yehan adjusted his hold on the bass and lightly plucked a string. Even that simple gesture to check the tuning was utterly wonderful.

When Yehan played a song, the sweet melody of a piano began to echo softly. It was a familiar jazz piece. And to that tune, he began to play.

His fingers moved freely on the smooth fingerboard, creating a soft, low tone. It was not a playing style that showed off with technique like Haseong’s, but his skill was easily discernible just from the sense he had for hitting the correct notes and rhythms.

He played well. So well that it was hard to believe he was someone who had not played for over 10 years. The fact that he was playing jazz, not the famous rock music one usually associated with the ‘bass,’ was also very Yehan-like.

‘…But something.’

The way he held the large bass as if soothing a baby, his sophisticated playing style, the rumbling tone unique to a fretless bass, his downcast eyes under his long eyelashes, and his long fingers and the white back of his hand where veins bulged, in contrast to his beautiful face.

All of it felt familiar, to the point of déjà vu. He had seen Yehan’s eyes and hands to his heart’s content on a daily basis, but seeing him playing the bass all at once suddenly unearthed a faded longing from Haseong’s memory.

‘Do you want it? I don’t need it anymore.’

‘Your body and hands are small so you won’t be able to play it right away, but you’ll grow someday.’

‘Before that, whether you sell it or keep it, that’s up to you. From now on, you’re the owner.’

‘It’s a farewell gift.’

Old memories that had been piled up in layers beneath his consciousness were peeled away one by one, gradually revealing themselves on the surface. At the same time, the clock in his mind slowly turned back to 12 years ago.

The hyung who always came to church wearing a mask. The hyung who stroked his head at his cheeky request to teach him bass. The hyung whose smiling eyes were only visible when he stood on his tiptoes and tilted his head back as far as he could. The hyung who one day suddenly gave him a fretless bass and then disappeared.

‘Hyung-ah, what’s a farewell?’

Back then, what did that hyung tell him….

“He really does play well, doesn’t he. That damn lucky bastard. He would have succeeded even if he’d gone into music. Don’t you think?”

“…….”

Hyeongseok asked as if seeking agreement, but Haseong, trapped in the past, did not even realize someone was talking to him. Hyeongseok, clicking his tongue at the sight, poked him in the small of his back as if to tell him to snap out of it, and only then could he return to reality.

“You can’t take your eyes off him. Haseong, do you like it that much?”

“It’s, it’s cool, but it’s also just so… familiar.”

“Familiar? I doubt he’s ever played bass out anywhere.”

Hearing that, he became even more certain. Not just bassists, but anyone who handles an instrument has their own unique form. The posture when holding the instrument, the habits or quirks one unconsciously displays when playing, or even something as trivial as a preferred playing style or tone.

Of course, you could not judge ‘this is so-and-so’ just by seeing them once or twice, but Yehan’s appearance was all too familiar in every aspect.

So much time had passed, he had barely even seen his face properly, and he had only called him ‘hyung-ah’ so his name was also hazy, but the moment he saw him playing the bass, the image from 12 years ago, the last time he had seen him, overlapped so perfectly it gave him goosebumps. It seemed that since he had first learned the posture for playing the bass while watching him, that one thing was firmly imprinted in his mind.

By the time he was about 90% certain, the performance was over. Yehan, seeming to have no intention of playing more after that one song, immediately put the bass back in its case. Hyeongseok, noticing the performance was over, also quickly left, using the excuse of settling the accounts.

Haseong’s concentration had flown away from the latter half of the performance, as he was desperate to ask if he was that hyung. Haseong approached with quick steps, his face flushed with excitement.

“Hyung!”

“I’m disappointed. I saw you chatting with Hyeongseok without even listening from the middle part.”

Haseong’s mouth, which was about to ask about the church right away, clamped shut like a clamshell. Yehan had an expression as if he were thoroughly sulking. It was clear just from the way he sighed first and complained of his disappointment.

“I did, I did listen.”

After all the begging to see him play the bass, it was only natural for him to be displeased to see him get distracted during the actual performance. At his unnaturally stuttered reply, Yehan made a very unconvinced face.

“Liar.”

“It’s true that I talked with the boss for a bit in the middle, and honestly, I did get a bit sidetracked, but I did listen to the whole thing until the end, really.”

“What is that. Isn’t that just confessing that you didn’t listen from the middle onwards?”

At the sharp point, Haseong’s gaze fell to the floor. Watching him, Yehan burst into another round of laughter and pulled Haseong by the waist to sit him on his lap. Startled, Haseong glanced down to where Hyeongseok had been, then, a beat later, remembered he had left and relaxed his body.

“Then let’s say you listened. What are your thoughts?”

It definitely could not be comfortable, sitting on a backless, narrow, and flimsy stool while holding another person. Unlike Haseong, who was fidgeting for fear the stool might collapse, Yehan looked perfectly serene. Thanks to that, Haseong, shouldering all the fear for his part, wrapped his arms around Yehan’s neck and muttered.

“You played so well that I feel intimidated, so I don’t know why you’ve been asking me to play the bass all this time….”

“I told you I don’t really like playing myself.”

“…May I ask why you don’t like it.”

“Hmm, maybe because I just suddenly lost interest one day?”

It was an answer that lacked sincerity. But if he had suddenly lost all interest and passion for playing the bass and had given the instrument to him before disappearing, then it did add up. Gaining courage from that, Haseong once again bravely let out the question he had failed to ask earlier.

“Hyung, did you by any chance go to church a long time ago?”

“Church? Why church all of a sudden? I’ve never been.”

“Ah….”

Yehan even raised his eyebrows as if to ask what kind of out-of-the-blue thing this was. For Haseong, who had been almost certain that hyung and Yehan were the same person, it was a heartbreaking response. The moment he let out a pained sound, unable to hide his disappointment, Yehan suddenly opened his mouth.

“No, wait, did I go for a very short time for volunteer work? I can’t remember if it was a church or a cathedral. It was too long ago, I can’t remember well.”

“Volunteer work?”

“Around… when was it. Around when I was in high school?”

That would mean it was roughly more than 10 years ago. Since the time period also roughly matched the year he remembered, the excitement that had died down began to rise again.

“What did you mainly do for volunteer work?”

“It was something like a talent donation, teaching elementary school kids. But it’s all hazy. It wasn’t something I wanted to do in the first place.”

Even the educational volunteering, everything matched. But his rapidly beating heart sank coldly as if it had been doused with ice water.

He could not even remember that he had gone to church for a short time, and he had not even gone with a good heart. No one would be able to readily ask, ‘I’m that little kid from back then! You remember me, right?’

Unaware of Haseong’s inner turmoil, Yehan spat out memories as they came to him.

“My father forced me to go. I was busy studying, so I was just annoyed that he was telling me to leisurely strum the bass in front of some kids I’d never even met.”

“Still, since it was teaching kids, I’d think it would have been rewarding…. Among them, there must have been one or two memorable kids….”

“None at all. I only remembered I did volunteer work at a church because you asked, Haseong ssi.”

“…….”

It was the moment when even the last speck of hope had burst and vanished.

Remembering alone, giving meaning alone, hoping alone, and even being disappointed on his own…. It was nothing short of a one-man show that had lasted for 12 years. Of course, he too had not recognized that the ‘hyung-ah’ from his memories was Yehan until he saw him play the bass, but still. He had not forgotten his existence itself like Yehan had.

The very fact that he had kept a person he met in passing when he was 10 years old in his memory was proof of how significant that hyung was to Haseong. Just as Yehan’s reaction a moment ago had proven just how insignificant the ‘little kid he passed the fretless bass to’ was to him.

‘No, that’s not it…. Hyung is the normal one. I’m the strange one.’

In a situation where the names and faces of most of his classmates who graduated from high school with him just two years ago were already hazy, he was the abnormal one for holding onto a connection from 12 years ago. Especially since Yehan must have gone to university and debuted as an actor, living and rubbing shoulders with countless people.

In an environment where he met countless new faces every day and parted ways before he could even get familiar with them, it would be more surprising if he remembered the name and face of a little kid he taught for just a few months 12 years ago. The fact that he forgot his existence entirely is a little… sad. But thinking of it this way, he could understand.

“And I was a bit sensitive back then because of puberty. I hated having people loitering around me so much that I always wore a hat and a mask pulled down.”

Haseong nodded his head. Wearing a hat and a mask narrows your field of vision, so that must have played a part in him not remembering him. Besides, if forced to go to a church he did not even attend and do volunteer work, anyone would have hated it. A teenage boy even more so.

“Since I was forced to do it, I didn’t grow attached, and people who got clingy were just annoying…. I think that’s how it was. But why the sudden question about the church?”

All these thoughts were perfectly normal for someone going through puberty. Rather, shouldn’t he be grateful that Yehan had been nothing but kind when teaching him, without showing any dislike?

So, there was nothing to be disappointed about. Let’s not be disappointed. It’s even funnier to be disappointed, Yoon Haseong. Who do you think you are…. From Yehan’s perspective, he might even be more creeped out by me, who has treasured this bass, which was given without any special meaning, all this time.

He desperately repeated this to himself and bit his tongue. He did not want to be disappointed in Yehan. Getting his feelings hurt all by himself over something someone else did not even remember was, in the end, just another one-man show. To answer as normally as possible, Haseong had to squeeze out all his remaining energy.

“…I was just curious if you also learned the bass at church like I did, hyung. That’s the most common case among people who play the bass, you know.”

“I learned from my father. I’m an atheist to begin with, so I have no interest in religious activities.”

Fortunately, his effort seemed to work, as Yehan answered calmly. Then, with a thud, he buried his face in Haseong’s chest and mumbled.

“It is a little disappointing, though. If there had been a little kid like you, Haseong ssi, I might have taken more interest and been a bit more diligent.”

Ah, so the kindness this person shows is really nothing special.

The thought that came to him at the same time as the feeling of being pushed off a cliff was truly a futile one.

He had always wondered why he was so good to him. Both when he was young, and now. Because he casually gave him a kindness and affection he had never received in his life. It felt like a water bottle being held to his lips by someone when he was dying of thirst, so he had attached all sorts of meaning to it and considered it special. And he had wondered.

He must not have offered the water bottle without any meaning. Perhaps the sight of him dying had caught his eye, or as a matter of human decency, he just could not pretend not to see it and pass by, there had to be at least one such humanitarian reason. Or maybe, just maybe, even though he knew there was no such possibility anymore, but still.

…that he might feel the same way he did. He had indulged in every delusion imaginable all by himself.

But it was none of those things. Yehan had merely dropped a spare water bottle on his way by, and he, the thirsty one, had just hastily picked it up and drank, getting lost in his delusions. It was nothing more and nothing less than that.

‘He should have just said he forgot, that he couldn’t remember well….’

I already existed in that past you were hypothesizing about, hyung. But back then, you weren’t happy at all. You just said so yourself with your own lips. That you didn’t grow attached and it was just annoying.

Haseong swallowed back the words he wanted to say. Let’s say that was because they were both young back then. Then what about the present? The future? Someday in the future, after his and Yehan’s connection is severed, if he meets someone else, won’t he say the same thing as he did now? To anyone other than him, that if it had been you, it might have been a little enjoyable….

‘I hate it.’

Just imagining it was so detestable it made him shudder. He wanted to keep monopolizing this kindness, even if it held no meaning. He knew it was an audacious greed and a thought that threw away all pride, but what could he do. He had come to like him so much that he had already gone through layers of self-justification, creating all sorts of reasons to try and understand him, thinking that it was understandable for Yehan to have forgotten him, and that it could not be helped even if he had found him annoying.

Haseong stared at the back of Yehan, who was snuggling in his arms, and repeatedly opened and closed his lips. In the end, however, he could not bring himself to ask what he truly wanted to ask and instead chirped foolishly.

“…You’re just saying that.”

“Hmm? I don’t say things I don’t mean. Why do you think I’m just saying it?”

Yehan pulled his body away as if expressing his indignation and cupped Haseong’s cheeks, smiling sweetly.

“You’re this cute now, so you must have been even cuter when you were young. Speaking of which, don’t you have any pictures from when you were a child? I want to see them.”

The eighteen-year-old Yehan who had softly taught him about the charms of the fretless bass, saying that although it was difficult to learn, he liked its unique sound and feel. The ten-year-old version of himself who, while listening to that explanation, had inwardly thought that no one could suit the instrument called a fretless bass as well as hyung.

And the twenty-two-year-old Haseong, who reunited with the thirty-year-old Yehan, corrected his thought. It was not that the instrument suited him, but that Yehan himself was like a fretless bass.

A soft and gentle low tone, a sleek appearance and a unique tone that bewitched people. But a difficult instrument that was hard to even produce a clear note from when one actually tried to play it. A person who was difficult to approach but whom one was drawn to as if mesmerized, who seemed affectionate but whose inner thoughts were impossible to know. As expected of the original owner, they were very much alike.

The only difference was.

“…I don’t have any pictures from when I was young.”

“You don’t? Then I guess there’s nothing to be done.”

That he continuously made one harbor questions.

Will the day ever come when I know everything about that person? Whether that day comes or not, I think I will continue to like that person. I have no choice but to like him. Until then, will that person be by my side? If he is not by my side, will he even remember me?

One could become proficient with an instrument through practice, but the more he wondered about Yehan, the more it felt like he was falling into a labyrinth rather than things becoming clearer. But he knew that it was the fate of the one with a one-sided love to have no choice but to keep wondering…. Because of that, Haseong could not help but feel a little sad.

A little more so than when he found out that Yehan had completely forgotten his existence.

Since when was it? On Saturdays, it had become a given schedule to get into Yehan’s car after finishing work at the live club and go to his house.

Haseong, who came out after washing up in the bathroom that was now so familiar he could find things without asking where they were, sat quietly on the sofa without even turning on the living room lights. The entire house was pitch black. Because of that, the night view outside the window sparkled more than usual, but for some reason, he did not even feel that it was pretty today.

Haseong turned his gaze away from where it had been fixed on the window. In the process, his eyes were naturally drawn to an object on the coffee table right in front of the sofa, sparkling alone as it caught the light from outside the window. It was a hair tie with two small, bright red baubles attached.

‘So this is where it was.’

It was the tie his ex-girlfriend had playfully used to tie his hair up like a pineapple top when he once complained that his bangs were poking his eyes. Even though the look was bizarre, it was surprisingly comfortable, so he often used it when working even after they broke up. After starting his second job, he could not go to the salon often, so his back hair had grown long enough to be roughly tied up, making it useful.

It seemed he had brought it along with his laptop, intending to work at Yehan’s house, and left it there. Just seeing it on the living room table gave him a rough idea. He must have left it in the living room, gone into Yehan’s room, and… probably had not been able to get out of bed until just before going home.

No wonder it was not at home. I’ll grab it later. Right now, he was too lazy to lift a single finger, so he was just about to leave the tie as it was and bury his face in his knees.

“What are you doing with all the lights off?”

Yehan, who had finished washing up at some point, turned on the living room light and approached. Wearing a bathrobe, he walked over with large strides and asked as he dried Haseong’s wet hair with a towel.

“That’s strange. Why are you suddenly so down again. Are you perhaps angry at me for something?”

“No, I’m not.”

“What do you mean, no. Your nose will grow if you lie.”

“Why my nose…. I’m just a little tired…, I’m tired.”

Haseong mumbled weakly as he touched the tip of his nose, which Yehan had lightly pinched and let go. It was not a lie, as it had been a hard day both mentally and physically.

“You did look very busy. It’s tough working two jobs, isn’t it?”

Yehan spread his arms wide and pulled Haseong into a hug with an exaggeratedly large motion. Thanks to that, Haseong was buried in the fluffy bathrobe and had no choice but to feel Yehan’s touch. He could feel him repeatedly patting his head and the small of his back, and then pressing his lips to the fluffy hair on top of his head. In that state, Yehan continued to speak.

“You can quit Hyeongseok’s place anytime. I was worried you might be overdoing it, thinking, ‘I can’t just quit a position that hyung practically set up for me.’”

Listening to the voice murmuring softly by his ear, an unknown emotion surged up. Whether he was secretly angry as he said, or just wanted to cry, or if it was because he was happy. He really did not know anything. Haseong just chewed on his innocent lips and buried his face deeper into Yehan’s chest.

Then, he unconsciously sniffed at the different body scent than usual. He had washed up at this house for more than a day or two, so he was familiar enough with the scents of the shower products to have memorized them. But this time, it was not the scent he always smelled, but a sweet and bitter scent, as if damp, that tickled the tip of his nose.

‘Did he only change the products in that bathroom?’

What was certain was that it was a scent so good that it made him feel languidly relaxed even in the midst of his dejected mood. It was too bitter to be a floral scent, and it even had a somewhat humid feel, but it was a strange scent with a luxurious lingering fragrance that kept hovering. In a word, it suited Yehan perfectly.

“What’s this, you’re letting yourself be pampered so quietly. You usually start rapping about how it’s not like that and whatever.”

As he leaned into his embrace, liking the scent, and just stayed there limply, Yehan muttered as if surprised. At his words, Haseong pulled his face away from his chest and hastily lifted his head. And just like that, his cheeks were caught and he was pulled toward Yehan’s lips.

“Eup, ah, wait….”

Taking advantage of the gap after their lips lightly touched and parted, Haseong pushed Yehan away and turned his chin as if to express his refusal. He really was not in the mood today. He would have nothing to say if he was asked what he was talking about after following him all the way to his house, but… his feelings were complicated in many ways.

“Hyung, I’m really tired today, so….”

“You can sleep if you’re tired. I’ll take care of the fucking on my own.”

At the same time, his upper body was pushed back. Haseong, who was forced into a lying position with his back against the sofa regardless of his will, immediately tried to get his body back up. But no sooner had he raised his upper body halfway than the knot of his pants, which he had been wearing barely clinging to his pelvis with the elastic tightened, came undone with a slither.

“No, wait, what are you do, eut!”

As if untying the properly tightened knot was not enough, a hand grabbed the loosened waistband and pulled it down, and Haseong screamed in fright. But Yehan did not even pretend to listen and pulled down his underwear as well.

Haseong, who had become half-naked in an instant, flailed his legs, but Yehan easily pinned them down and grabbed his fully exposed genitals.

“It seems you’re feeling burdened because you’ve never done it or received it before, so I’m going to teach you.”

“I do, don’t need…. Heup!”

Yehan’s upper body pushed between his legs, pressing down on his thighs. At the same time, a slick tongue touched the surface of his cold, flaccid penis. Every time the warm tongue licked the cold shaft, it grew hot as if a fire had been lit, and the inside of his thighs twisted as if in a spasm.

“You don’t need to stupidly put the whole thing in your mouth and suck.”

No sooner had he touched it with his tongue than he cupped the half-erect cock with his hand, lifted it, and buried his nose in the curved area leading to the testicles before sticking out his tongue again. The sensation of his soft tongue licking a sensitive spot that would make him flinch if anyone so much as touched it, and a particularly thin-skinned area at that, was unbearably tingle-inducing.

Every time his teeth sank into the paper-thin skin covering the scrotum, a gasping sound, heek, escaped him on its own. Looking up at Haseong, Yehan, with a mischievous smile covering his face, deliberately swallowed one of the plump testicles and mumbled.

The sight of him, unable to even breathe properly and just trembling his legs, whether from arousal or nervousness, stimulated his sadistic side. Yehan toyed with just one testicle, persistently, until it was soaked in saliva, and just when he thought the kid might suffocate and die, he spat out what he had been mumbling in his mouth and whispered.

“You just need to use your tongue well. Like this.”

“Keuk, sto, stop…!”

Haseong’s chest heaved greatly as he gasped for breath. Was it because it was soaked with saliva? The sensation of still being sucked on did not easily disappear. Haseong thrashed his head, trying to somehow calm his legs that were trembling against his will.

“Really stop?”

“Heuu… Euk!”

But even his struggling resistance of thrashing his head came to a halt at the touch that roughly rummaged the tip of his fully erect cock. His pale skin had also long since turned a flushed red. Among them, Yehan caressed the particularly pretty pink-flushed dick and opened his mouth again.

“Then, when it gets about this erect, at that point….”

“…Heu, at, aah!”

The moment the glans, slick with precum, was enveloped by the hot mucous membrane, he thrashed as if letting out a cheer. He could feel a gush of thin mucus overflowing from his urethra, which was flaring uncontrollably. Due to his unprecedented excitement, the precum that had been trickling out seemed to have lost its self-control as well.

Perhaps sensing the change that occurred in his mouth, Yehan rolled the tongue that had been enveloping and licking the entire glans to tantalizingly lick just the flaring opening, as if to tease it. The small opening was blocked by the warm tongue and repeatedly puckered. It was a stimulation that would make it no surprise if his head went crazy right then and there.

“…Haah. Like this, you can just put the glans in your mouth and roll it around.”

Yehan mumbled with his mouth as he wrapped his hand around the base of Haseong’s cock.

“Well, you just have to swallow as much as you can. How much would that be, for me….”

He, who had been playing around by swallowing only up to the glans the whole time, tilted his head as if to gauge before the act, and then slowly lowered his face.

Just having the tip of the glans swallowed had been enough to make his whole body twist, but when the shaft also began to be nibbled away, he had no way to endure it. Haseong screamed as he flailed his immobile lower body.

“…A-euk! Ah, heuut, eu, n, no…!”

The more he did so, the deeper Yehan swallowed Haseong’s cock. When his genitals were buried in the wet, hot, narrow, and appropriately soft yet hard throat, an extreme sense of ejaculation shot through his entire body.

“Stop, eut! I, really, aa-euk!”

Reason had already flown far away. Haseong reflexively grabbed Yehan’s head and bent his neck back. At the same time, his hips lifted high and a sense of liberation, to the point of ecstasy, washed over him.

In the pleasure that made the tips of his hands and feet tremble, Haseong lay there dazedly for a while, forgetting even the fact that he had just ejaculated in Yehan’s mouth, and fidgeted his body.

“Heok….”

He came to his senses only after seeing Yehan spit out the cock he had been holding and wipe his lips with the back of his hand. The moment he saw the whitish semen smeared on the back of his hand and his lips, a superhuman strength surged from Haseong’s body, which had been lying limp and exhausted.

Haseong shot up and sat upright on the sofa. Because the sin he had committed was no ordinary one, even the words “Are you okay?” did not come out readily. Watching Haseong, who was staring at him with trembling pupils, his hands, which were still trembling from the aftereffects of ejaculation, clenched into fists, Yehan let out a chuckle.

“This is the first time I’ve done this for someone else, and for my first experience, I even got to swallow semen with my mouth.”

“Sor, I’m sorry, really, I, I also suddenly…!”

“It’s okay. It’s not like I haven’t eaten your semen before, Haseong ssi. It went down right away so I didn’t even taste it much. Because someone shot it as if aiming right for my throat.”

“…….”

What on earth was the intention behind sticking out his semen-smeared tongue as if to confirm it for him, while saying he did not even taste it much. The white streaks entangled on the bright red tongue struck Haseong’s mind. Of all the visual stimuli he had experienced in his life, this was the best. His lower parts, forgetting even his guilt, stealthily grew in size.

Watching that, Yehan narrowed his eyes and continued to speak, repeatedly wetting his lips with his semen-smeared tongue.

“Well, what can I do about the fact that you came without my permission, Haseong ssi. I’ll just have to think, I must have sucked it well.”

“Hyung, please… the words….”

He never even used common curse words normally, so why on earth was he so good at using such vulgar words. Of course, if someone who looked as holy as Yehan cursed all the time, that would be jarring in its own way, but every time he saw that angelic face say things like… dick, or came, the gap was so great it was enough to give him chills.

“I did think you came faster than usual, you must have felt it a lot, huh? Your dick got plump right away too.”

The request Haseong had painstakingly made was immediately ignored. At the motion of flicking the penis that had gotten erect again right after ejaculating, Haseong quickly covered his lower parts. Whether his covering palm got messy with semen or not was not his concern right now.

His penis, which had stealthily raised its head the moment Yehan showed him the semen tangled on his tongue, could not have been more resentful. To be precise, he was resentful of himself for being particularly weak and unable to pull himself together in front of visual stimuli. As Haseong sat hunched over, tormented by self-loathing, a long, thick shadow suddenly fell before him.

Through the gap in his loosened bathrobe, a menacingly erect cock was bobbing right in front of him. Yehan asked as he slowly rubbed the shaft of his cock.

“What should I do, should I just fuck you right away like this. Or should I get off once too before we start.”

“Either way… it’s the same, isn’t it.”

“It’s different. If I get off once beforehand, won’t I be a little less rough when I fuck you?”

At the sight of him presenting the options with a sweet smile, Haseong hesitated. As it was, he always had a hard time because his stamina was lower than Yehan’s whenever they had sex. If he could wear out Yehan’s stamina before the main act, as he claimed, wouldn’t it be a little easier?

And he was also very sorry for coming in his mouth earlier. Although his lower parts, which could not grasp the situation, were standing at attention, his heart was still filled with apology.

Of course, it was something that happened because Yehan had started sucking his penis on his own, but at the moment of ejaculation, it was clearly his own fault for grabbing his head, making him unable to move, and making him receive his semen with his mouth.

“…Should I do it just like you did, hyung?”

Am I really going to dislocate my jaw doing this? Haseong suppressed his uneasy feelings and hesitantly opened his mouth. It was not as if he was the only one demanding it be done to him, and he had even given an excellent demonstration first. Yes, just once….

Having made up his mind, he looked between Yehan’s legs, and Yehanそのまま casually lifted Haseong and set him down on the floor. Then, sitting on the sofa and spreading open the front of his robe, he pushed Haseong’s head between his legs and instructed in a low voice.

“Slowly. Just do as I taught you earlier.”

Haseong had a staring contest with the cock in front of him for a long time, in a kneeling position on the bare floor. This was the first time he had looked at it so intently from a distance where, literally, his nose would touch it if he fell forward.

Veins bulged prominently along the shaft, it was a much darker red than his own genitals, and the shaft and glans were as thick as a wrist…. Honestly, it was grotesque. Even more so because it was in such stark contrast to his face.

After taking a deep breath, Haseong finally made his decision and slowly closed the distance, and the erect cock bobbed on its own and landed on his lips with a slap. Haseong, his lips, which had been splattered with clear fluid, neither open nor closed, froze for a moment before just sticking out his tongue and licking the surface of the dick.

It was sour. But not to the point of being as nauseating as he had imagined. Was it because it was not semen? He was not sure if this was an appropriate analogy, but the feeling was similar to licking a finger that had cookie crumbs on it. The feeling was not bad, and Haseong gradually got used to it.

“Hoo…, that’s right. Like that.”

He did not have the courage to lick the flaring urethra and the gleaming glans, so he timidly stuck out his tongue and licked only the shaft, gradually expanding the area.

Curious about the texture of the bulging veins, he tried scraping them with his front teeth, and like Yehan had done, he buried his face in the root of the cock and lightly touched the scrotum as well. Each time, he could feel Yehan’s body tense up, which made his curiosity grow even more.

When he licked further up, he could feel Yehan’s nicely thick thigh muscles hardening completely.

It was a new experience that Yehan was feeling pleasure solely through his clumsy oral ministrations, and that his reaction was being exposed so openly. Until now, it had always been him who felt pleasure from Yehan and helplessly crumbled. For some reason, that felt both satisfying and exhilarating, so Haseong gathered a little more courage.

When he touched the glans with the tip of his tongue, the grip on his hair, which had been gently rummaging through it, suddenly tightened. Stimulated by that, Haseong opened his jaw wide and slowly buried his head.

“Pu-eu….”

The corners of his stretched lips stung, but he somehow succeeded in swallowing up to the glans. It had a much more sour taste than when he had licked the other parts, but it was not enough to make him gag. Haseong stopped his movements and caught his breath.

“…Look at me while you have my dick in your mouth. Look up at me.”

Simultaneously with the command, the back of his head, which was being held, was yanked back with a jerk. Haseong reflexively frowned and looked up. He still had the glans in his mouth.

“Yes, you’re doing well….”

A moan-like mumble escaped from Yehan’s half-open lips. His disheveled bathrobe was barely hanging on his shoulders. Even looking up from below, his perfect upper body muscles, with absolutely no excess, were slick with sweat.

In the sight where lewdness and holiness strangely coexisted, Haseong could not take his eyes off him, even with his mouth agape, holding the cock. It was the moment his eyes met Yehan’s, which were hazy and unfocused.

“Keok! Keuheup…!”

Yehan, who had been passively receiving Haseong’s caresses the whole time, suddenly moved. At the hand that pressed down firmly on the back of his head, Haseong was forced to swallow past the glans to the beginning of the shaft. The cock that pushed in roughly poked the roof of his mouth.

His mouth was so full that there was no space to even swallow his saliva, and his tightly stretched jaw ached. Yet, Yehan did not release the strength in his grip.

Swallowing any more than this was impossible. Frightened, Haseong tensed his neck stiffly, and the hand that had been pressing on the back of his head moved down to gently stroke his nape and lower jaw, cooing as if soothing a baby.

“I won’t push it all the way to your throat, so relax.”

“Keub….”

As he said that, the motion of pushing a little deeper made him want to vomit. The cock that pushed in, scraping the roof of his mouth, rested its head near the root of his tongue and poked around wherever it pleased. Because of that, the saliva that had pooled in his mouth seeped out past his lips and trickled down.

“It’s okay to drool, so don’t wipe your chin and keep looking up at me.”

When he wiped his chin with the back of his hand because the dripping was unpleasant, Yehan once again forcefully pulled his head to make him look at him. Then, as if playing with his small head, he persistently thrust his cock deep into one corner of his cheek. Each time, he tickled Haseong’s cheek, which bulged out in the shape of his cock, and smiled as if he were happy.

“Haha, how cute. It’s like you’re sucking on a candy.”

Wow, this person, really…. When it came to sex, his personality was not just a little mischievous. Was he really the same person as that kind hyung he had met when he was young? Back then, was his inside just as perverted as this, even if he did not show it? More importantly, why did I volunteer to do this? What nerve did I have. It must look ridiculous to hyung too, since I got erect twice in a row after saying I wasn’t in the mood.

Haseong swallowed his belated regret and focused on opening his mouth as wide as possible. He said he would not push it to his throat, but he had to be able to trust him.

“This much is okay, right?”

Fortunately, Yehan removed his hand from the back of his head after shoving his cock right up to the entrance of his throat. Not that it made him any less likely to throw up.

Haseong wiped away the tears that had welled up due to the physiological reaction and tried to gauge roughly how much had entered his mouth. He could not even breathe, yet to his despair, a little more than half of Yehan’s exposed cock remained.

…Just as he was marveling at how one could take this from behind, Yehan carefully cupped his cheeks. In that state, holding Haseong’s face, he moved his hands back and forth.

“Wookeub, oop, keub, keoheuk!”

At the sudden impact, Haseong could not even resist properly and was shaken helplessly. The roof of his mouth, the root of his tongue, his uvula, from the corners of his cheeks to his gums. There was no place his cock did not rummage. It was a motion that truly only kept the promise of not putting it all the way into his ‘throat.’

Every time the fist-sized glans jabbed his uvula, a wave of nausea surged up and tears flowed down. His saliva had long since soaked his chin. His breath was cut off to the point where his eyes were rolling back. Even if he wanted to escape, he could not even turn his body because he was trapped between Yehan’s legs.

All he could do was scratch Yehan’s thigh with his trembling hands and look up with a plea to please stop.

“Keuk…!”

And the moment he thought his eyes met Yehan’s beyond his hazy vision, a bitter liquid shot into his mouth. He could vividly feel the genitals spewing liquid, repeatedly contracting and swelling.

Ah, no way, is this… semen? Did he just come in my mouth?

Startled, Haseong was a beat late in grasping the situation, and Yehan quickly pulled out his cock and urgently held out his open palm.

“Ah, damn it. I’m sorry. Did you swallow it? I wasn’t planning on coming inside…, spit it out here for now.”

So it was semen. No sooner had he recognized it than Haseong spat out everything he had been holding in his mouth. He did not even have a moment to register that it was onto Yehan’s palm. He just tried to somehow retch out the remaining bitter taste.

“Weck…, kolok!”

After spitting everything out, a series of harsh coughs followed. It was because the semen that had gone down his throat was fishy. Yehan looked at the white puddle pooled in his palm and clicked his tongue.

“Came a lot, didn’t I. I’m really sorry. When I saw the tears welling up in your eyes, Haseong ssi, I suddenly….”

“…Hyung, are you by any chance… a pervert, or something like that?”

“I didn’t used to have this kind of taste…. I guess I became like that because of you, Haseong ssi. Something like a pervert.”

To the question dripping with resentment, he wiped his hand roughly with a tissue and shrugged his shoulders. Then, he put his foot down and lightly crushed Haseong’s still-alive cock and grinned.

“But from what I can see, I think you’re also one of those pervert-like things, Haseong ssi?”

“Th, this is because from earlier…!”

His chirping mouth was immediately blocked. Haseong, who had been sitting on the floor, felt his body being lifted up and naturally closed his eyes. The lips that touched his, which always smelled so good, tasted bitter for some reason.

A tongue that naturally pushed its way in wriggled and wrapped around the root of Haseong’s tongue, pulling it out. The more their tongues slickly intertwined, the stronger the bitter taste that was transmitted.

His tongue tasted bitter, and the saliva that went down his throat was fishy. For some reason, it felt even dirtier than when he had received semen in his mouth, but conversely, it also felt dirty good. Yehan seemed to be the same, as he greedily sucked on his tongue before mumbling.

“Wow, the smell of my semen is overpowering. Can you smell your own semen too, Haseong ssi?”

“…….”

Simultaneously with a faint nod of his head, his body was laid down. As if anticipating the act to follow, Yehan reached his hand between his legs, which had parted on their own. The fingers that dug into his hole without any lube increased in number with unusual ease today.

“Heut, eu-eung!”

“Did you loosen up your hole by yourself while you were washing up?”

Yehan also made a puzzled face and asked as he thrust three fingers in. Haseong covered his eyes with his forearm and bit his lip.

“N, no, eut!”

“I guess your hole is docile like you, Haseong ssi. Already tamed like this.”

Docile? The main act had not even begun, but Haseong was going crazy because of his strangely ticklish hole today. From the moment Yehan’s finger touched the entrance of his hole, it had started to pucker as if in welcome, and despite being rough without any lube, it was even accepting and sucking on every finger that entered.

Something was strange. No matter how used to it he had become, he had never acted like this… like he was in heat. Normally, he would have frowned at the unpleasant foreign sensation and been busy pushing away even just two fingers, but now, having accepted and sucked on three without any lube, his facial muscles were trying to go slack.

Moreover, the inner walls, which had been tight until they were properly loosened, had already become soft and were heating up his insides. Even without Yehan deliberately using his wrist, his hole puckered on its own, tightening and releasing the fingers. Yehan soothed Haseong by gently stroking his plump perineum with his thumb.

“You said you were tired. Your hole looks like it’s going to chew up my fingers, really.”

“A-eung, eu, heu-eung….”

“You’re especially whiny today. Wait a minute. I have to put on lube.”

“Heu….”

He said so and pulled out all the fingers that had been stirring inside. At the sensation of his bottom suddenly becoming empty, the tips of Haseong’s toes twitched. Even when he had the fingers inside, his insides had felt empty and he had been restless, but when his hole became completely empty, an insane itch washed over him.

While Yehan went to get the lube, Haseong could not even think of closing his legs and just bit his lip, gasping for breath. It was so hard to endure the excitement for even those few short seconds that he even considered fucking his own hole with his hand.

The only reason he could not do it was purely a lack of courage. If he had had just a little more courage, or if he had lost his reason just a little more, he would have brought the finger that was vaguely hovering near his buttocks to his hole.

Finally, the awaited Yehan came out with the lube. Was he not in such a hurry because he had already come once? He squeezed the cylindrical tube of lube onto the hole and then carefully spread it inside, taking his time with the foreplay. In a hurry, he would just shove the tube into the hole, drench it with lube, and then immediately fuck him with his cock. Haseong, now resentful of all sorts of things, squeezed out his voice.

“Hyung, just, do it roughly and quickly….”

“Quickly?”

“Quickly… heuk….”

Only the most important words, “fuck me,” got stuck in his throat and could not come out. It was not for a grand reason like his last bit of pride, but in a similar context to not being able to fuck his own hole. A vaguely remaining reason and a lack of courage.

By this point, Yehan also seemed to have noticed that Haseong’s condition was somehow different from usual and hardened his expression.

“You didn’t happen to accept and eat any drinks or candy a customer gave you while you were working, did you?”

“N, no…. It’s just, something feels, heut, strange…. Heueuk, I don’t know either….”

“Then is it because it’s been too long since we last did it?”

He tilted his head and thrust his fingers in again.

“Ha-euk!”

This time it was not three at once, but a whopping four. It was satisfying that it was fuller than before, but it was vaguely insufficient. Even with the fingers filling it up tightly without any gaps, the still-ticklish hole seemed to be clamoring that it wanted something else.

A sweet whisper flowed to Haseong, who was flailing his legs and moaning.

“What did I say to do when you’re whining. I taught you earlier, hmm?”

How, what how…. His insides burned hot and tightened. The heat that spread from his lower abdomen reached the top of his head and sizzled his brain. Haseong pressed down on his stomach with his palm and tried to somehow revive his memory. But the vaguely remaining reason was slowly being worn away even at this very moment.

In the midst of it all, Yehan’s fingers stirred inside the hole, making a splashing sound. He gathered the four fingers, excluding the thumb, into a solid cylinder and thrust them inside all at once, then spread them like scissors, rummaging the narrow inner walls and poking different places. Then, when he scratched a particularly ticklish spot, Haseong’s hips would fly up each time.

Yehan did not miss Haseong’s reaction and persistently touched only that part again. The rest of his reason evaporated in an instant. Haseong managed to move his completely loosened tongue and form the words.

“Qui, quickly…. Hyung-ah….”

And before he could utter the final words “fuck me,” the fingers were pulled out and his cock was thrust in all the way to the root in one go.

A dick with a thickness and length incomparable to fingers tore open his hole and filled the inner walls tightly without any gaps. At the pleasure of all the ticklish spots finally being perfectly filled, Haseong drooled and went into a frenzy.

“A-eu-eu-euk!”

“It’s a 70 out of 100, but I’ll let it slide since it’s your first time.”

Yehan thrust his hips in small motions. Seeing his reaction, he had thought it would be okay and had thrust it all the way to the root of his dick at once, but even he was aware of his own size. Even if Haseong had gotten used to it, there was no telling if it might have been too much, so he barely suppressed his lust and, for now, moved his hips in short, shallow motions, carefully observing Haseong’s reaction.

He had no intention of making the foolish mistake of ruining something he was having fun with by being greedy. The fact that the kid was acting like he was on drugs today was also bothering him. At their reunion after two weeks, he had cutely wagged his tail and approached him, then suddenly drooped and subtly got on his nerves, and then, as soon as they started having sex, he changed like a different person.

This was why he had no choice but to suspect he had eaten something strange somewhere. He himself had said no, but…. Yehan, who did not trust Haseong in terms of intellectual ability, including his memory, did not find that claim very credible.

“A-eung, eu, eut, hoo, eung!”

Still, he was reacting properly to every thrust, and he had been relatively normal until the fellatio, so was he okay? Just in case, he held up one finger and waved it back and forth in front of his eyes.

Fortunately, although his pupils were foolishly unfocused, his eyeballs followed the finger’s movements well, so it seemed his worry was unfounded. In that case, Yehan had nothing more to hesitate about. He lifted Haseong’s left leg and got into position to start moving in earnest.

“Haah…. Leg over the backrest, that’s right.”

Trying to do it on the sofa limited the positions they could try. By spreading Haseong’s two legs as wide as possible, one on the sofa backrest and one held by himself, he managed to create a gap to penetrate. After securing the position like that and thrusting his hips, no sooner had he done so than Haseong’s inner walls were pulled up and sucked his cock in deeper.

“Ah, deep, heu-eut!”

“You like it when I fuck you this deep. Who’s calling who a pervert, hoo… I wonder.”

Yehan, who was rubbing the part that bulged out over his flat stomach, suddenly raised his eyebrows. Why did he lose so much weight? Just when they were grilling meat together, he ate well and was healthily sturdy.

But in just two weeks, not only had his cheeks become noticeably gaunt, but now that he looked, it seemed his stomach muscles had also loosened a bit. Normally, even when he fucked this deep, it would only rise shallowly between his abs, but today, it looked like the shape of his cock head, which was digging in right there, would be revealed as it was.

Since he had a sturdy basic frame, he would not look too shabby even if he lost weight, but…. For some reason, he did not like it. The body that had suddenly lost weight and felt different to the touch, the fact that he would not tell him the reason for his mood swings, the way he dealt so skillfully with the person who asked for his number as if he were used to it, and the fact that he carried around that bizarre hair tie, which was clearly a trace of his ex-girlfriend.

Yehan expressed his twisted mood by thrusting his hips roughly. After repeating the act of pulling out all the way to the glans and then fucking him to the root three or four times, Haseong screamed. The sound of his testicles slapping against his firm buttocks echoed throughout the living room.

The inner walls, which had been melting slickly since the fingers were inserted, moved like a living creature with a will of its own. When the cock penetrated, it would relax liquefactedly to receive the dick deeper, and when it pulled out, it would contract its muscles as if to bite it off, as if to say it felt empty.

The same went for the hole. The fine wrinkles, spread wide open, would munch on the dick, and when he pulled his cock out without warning, it would slowly pucker as if to beg him to put it back in quickly. Each time, the red, ripe inner flesh would peek out.

If his own cock had not been in such a hurry, he would have buried his face in the hole and sucked on it right then and there. Even the lube, which was melting like water from Haseong’s body heat and flowing down, made his mouth water, as if he were an omega dripping precum from behind.

The very reason he was having sex with Haseong was because he was not an omega, yet when they were actually doing it, he got turned on because he was like an omega. It was truly ironic.

“Stop whining.”

“Ah!”

Since it was a bit difficult to bury his face, he instead lightly slapped the puckering hole and the pale white perineum with his palm as if to soothe his disappointment. Was it because his skin was pale? He had never seen someone so pale all the way down here in his life.

Simultaneously with the firm sensation transmitted to his palm, Haseong’s buttocks jumped. Yehan grabbed the fair buttocks and spread them as if to split them in two, then pushed his dick back in.

Perhaps startled by the earlier stimulation, the inner walls tightened, pushing away the cock head that was parting them and entering, as if to refuse it. Yehan paid no mind and dug inside with even more force. It felt like his cock would break, but it did not matter. He too was already so excited that the whites of his eyes were turning red.

“Ah, hyung, there! A-eut! Ah, it, tickles… heu-eung!”

“Hoo, here? Or, keut, here?”

“A-heu! Eu, eung, heu-eut!”

Not just around the prostate, but anywhere deep inside seemed to make him go crazy with pleasure when he fucked it. As if his entire inside were an erogenous zone, Haseong twisted his body as if having a seizure with every thrust.

“Heu-eut, ha, a-eung, hyung, too much…, keu-eut!”

“Ah, keuk…!”

Deeper than the prostate, he thrust the glans into the part where the inner wall curved and bent, and thrust in small motions, and Haseong let out a long moan through his clenched teeth and bucked his hips. The inner walls also bit down and contracted as if to burst what was inside, so Yehan also let out a pained moan.

Barely holding back his ejaculation, Yehan stared blankly at his bottom. Haseong’s dick, which had not even been touched, spewed a thick, milky white liquid along the curve of his body.

The liquid that gushed out had not only dirtied Haseong’s stomach and chest but had also splattered all over his face. His face was a complete mess with the semen he had ejaculated, and he panted with unfocused eyes. Thinking it would sting if it got in his eyes, Yehan kindly wiped away the semen clinging to his eyes.

“Now you can even come on your own just by being fucked….”

Learning quickly was something to be proud of. Especially since things that were learned by body like this were greatly influenced by innate talent, it was only right to praise him even more. But why was this body, so talented, able to learn one thing but not two? Yehan genuinely wondered and reached out his hand.

“It’s commendable, but I’ve told you time and again not to come first.”

When he took the hair tie from the table and twirled it, Haseong’s eyes gradually filled with horror. It seemed he already knew what he was about to do. He should have learned on his own when he was controlling it with his hand. Yehan clicked his tongue softly and grabbed Haseong’s cock.

“Hyung, ah! No, that….”

He flailed his arms in resistance, but struggling with a body that had lost all its strength was not threatening at all. Yehan tied the hair tie tightly around the root of his cock and smiled. His cock was big, and its color was a pretty strawberry milk pink, so it went well with the red baubles.

“It’s pretty. It looks like you have cherries on your dick.”

“Hy, ung… please!”

“You should have thrown away things your ex-lover left behind right away. Who told you to carry it around?”

“It’s not, euk, like that…!”

“What do you mean, not like that. Anyone can see it’s something a woman used. If you’re going to carry it around, you should at least take good care of it.”

When he replied coldly, the way his expression crumbled into a mess was quite a sight. Ah, so this is why I haven’t gotten tired of him yet. Thinking a useless thought unlike himself, Yehan resumed his thrusting.

Haseong, who had already come twice and had his cock tied, just flopped around like a fish pulled out of water every time his insides were rummaged, unable to let out even a proper moan, let alone semen.

It seemed like hell to be continuously stimulated right after ejaculating. Haseong, who had been begging, “please, please,” in a breathless, slurred voice, seemed to have realized it was no use and was busy covering his reddened eyes as he sobbed.

Yehan grabbed both of Haseong’s arms with one hand to prevent him from covering his face and moved his hips, fixing him firmly in place. Watching the red, mushy inner flesh being pulled out and then pushed back in, Yehan also clenched his teeth.

“Keuk…!”

“……!”

Simultaneously with coming messily inside Haseong, he untied the tie that had been binding his cock. At that, the penis, which could not even get properly erect, trembled weakly and then let out a clear liquid. Haseong let out a strange sound like a hiccup and lay there limply, panting.

His body trembling intermittently, his eyes with the irises half-gone, the strange breathing sounds escaping his mouth, his body and face a mess of semen and all sorts of fluids. Now he really looked like someone on drugs.

Yehan observed the scene with satisfied eyes and rubbed the red tie on Haseong’s stomach. The liquid Haseong had ejaculated was trickling down his abdomen like a stream. The color of the bright red hair tie, soaked in the liquid, had changed to a dark red. He waved it in front of Haseong’s eyes.

“Can’t use this anymore, right?”

“…….”

Haseong’s head, which had been staring at the tie with unfocused eyes, finally lost consciousness and dropped to the side with a thud. Only after finally making Haseong faint did Yehan pull out his cock that he had been fucking him with. No sooner had his genitals been pulled out than white semen gushed out from the gap in the hole, which was repeatedly opening and closing.

He put his finger into the still-open hole and scraped out the semen that filled it, lost in thought. By this point, his twisted mood should have been resolved, but it was not at all. Rather, he wanted to somehow wake up the fainted man and torment him more.

Taking advantage of his half-dazed state, he wanted to fuck his cock all the way to his throat this time, force him to swallow his semen, and punish him by laying him over his knees and spanking his buttocks until they were swollen red, and then come enough to make his flat stomach swell up again.

He had always enjoyed somewhat messy and clingy sex, but he did not have such a sadistic taste. Especially not with a young kid who had almost no experience. Besides, Haseong was moderately submissive and obedient, and he was weak to pleasure and tended to show his reactions honestly. So, even if there were a few parts that were not to his liking, it was not something to torment him this much over, but for some reason, his every action today was particularly grating.

It was the same even in the state where he was half-convinced that Haseong genuinely liked him. It was not that he was being arrogant, but looking into the heart of a kid 8 years younger was easier than flipping his palm. Since he had approached him to make him that way, it was right to feel proud of the sense of accomplishment from achieving his goal. It was right, but….

‘What should I do with that fool.’

If he was the type who could not hide his feelings to that extent, it was obvious what he would have been like when he was in a relationship. It was clear he would have acted as if he were offering his liver and gallbladder as a basic. His girlfriend could say, “let’s do this,” and he’d say “okay,” and “let’s do that,” and he’d say “okay,” and he would have had no sense of self. Just as he was doing to him now.

He had a rough idea of how he had come to possess that hair tie as well. It was not something a man would have, and since Haseong did not have a sister, there was only one person who could have given him something like that.

This cheeky brat had been carrying around something his ex-lover had given him without a second thought, and had even dared to leave it at his house as if to show it off. He had left it alone, wondering when he would come looking for it, but in the end, Haseong had said nothing, and the tie had met its end like this, which was satisfying, but.

Yehan threw the dripping tie into the trash can and looked at Haseong again. The reason he found him pretty for being commendable one moment and then annoying the next was probably because of this side of Haseong. He was putting in an unprecedented amount of effort to play with him, yet he would do something unexpected in a strange place and get on his nerves. The time he had canceled their appointment on a whim was also a part of that annoying, unexpected behavior.

‘It would be nice if I could tighten my grip on him more…, perfectly.’

He was already obedient enough, but an abnormal desire to go beyond that and make him a disabled fool who only listened to his words would sometimes surge up. The reason it remained only a thought was partly because he was unfamiliar with himself for harboring such a desire for someone, and partly because he was barely scraping together his patience and restraining himself, as it was obvious he would have to take on a risk.

It was not as if he would take responsibility for the fool for the rest of his life, nor could he. So, if he broke him more than necessary, he would only be making things troublesome for himself later. Hadn’t he grown up watching an excellent example of that?

‘He’s a beta, so he won’t be broken to that extent, but.’

At least he would not be caught up in the tricks of pheromones like imprinting. Besides, Haseong was the type who, despite having terribly bad luck and fortune, had a surprisingly strong mental fortitude.

Considering how he had cried his eyes out after being dumped, he showed surprisingly little lingering attachment to his ex-girlfriend; it took a long time to cut off his band members, who were like family, but as soon as he decided it was the end, he blocked them right away; and although he seemed troubled by his mother’s situation, he ultimately did not borrow money.

So, wouldn’t it be okay to play with him a little more as he pleased? If he let him go around the time he showed signs of really becoming a fool, well, Haseong would probably overcome it well on his own. Without resenting him or nagging him annoyingly, he would really do well on his own.

He would be a little depressed, and then go back to his daily life as if nothing had happened. And he would continue his damnably diligent days again.

…Even that was somehow annoying, so Yehan pinched the fainted Haseong’s nose.