NFS 4.1

Joo Seung-ha hadn’t thought dating was anything special. He believed that being in a relationship wouldn’t change anything. After all, he hadn’t made any special plans about what he needed to do while dating someone. His weekly schedule was already packed with work and the shelter. Dating wasn’t likely to make his life any more special. But that was a misjudgment.

[The beta test is right around the corner, but we can’t fix this error.]

Upon seeing Seo Ahn-jae’s message, Joo Seung-ha could imagine him cursing while staring at the monitor. Though he was now the CEO and didn’t need to check every detail personally, being a former developer, he wouldn’t just stand by idly. So he must be incredibly busy right now. Yet he still sent messages every hour, like clockwork. After they started dating, the number of messages seemed to have doubled. No, maybe even tripled.

[Take a break and have some coffee.]

Well, the number of messages wasn’t really an issue. As a salesperson, receiving and responding to messages from various people was part of his job, so replying wasn’t difficult. Buzz—his phone vibrated again, displaying new text.

[Forget coffee, hearing your voice would help me breathe easier.]

[I’m busy.]

[But I can barely breathe in here?]

He wanted to say “What am I supposed to do about that,” but he was honestly at a loss. Seo Ahn-jae now constantly threw flirtatious comments that he would have previously dismissed as inappropriate. But Joo Seung-ha couldn’t coldly reject him like before. Yes, this was his problem. He didn’t want to be cold to him anymore. But he couldn’t smoothly respond to this unfamiliar way of talking either. Thanks to his accumulated data, his mind habitually came up with only stern replies.

[I’ll call 119 (emergency services) for you.]

Joo Seung-ha thought he’d sent a decent compromise as a joke, but it seemed the other party wasn’t satisfied.

[Just say my name. That’ll do.]

“…”

Joo Seung-ha hesitated for a moment, considering whether to press the call button, but ultimately couldn’t do it. There was a ticklish feeling inside his chest. This sensation felt awkward and somewhat frightening. Even though he knew he couldn’t love him as much as before, this ticklish feeling kept making Joo Seung-ha hesitate. Like a coward, Joo Seung-ha lowered his phone-holding hand and sighed as if making an excuse.

“Ah…I should have dated before.”

As if responding to his lament, his phone suddenly buzzed repeatedly. Joo Seung-ha stared at Seo Ahn-jae’s name on the screen for a moment before pressing the call button.

“Yes.”

—Did you hesitate?

If Seo Ahn-jae’s questioning voice had contained a hint of amusement, Joo Seung-ha might have gotten annoyed, but his low voice held no trace of playfulness. That would have made it easier to answer. Joo Seung-ha rubbed his face with his hand and tried to respond casually.

“Yes, a bit. I was thinking maybe I should take this chance to start calling you casually ‘Seo Ahn-jae.'”

A small laugh could be heard from the other line. It wasn’t even that funny, but his laughter continued for quite a while. Just hearing it made Joo Seung-ha feel how happy he was, so he waited quietly without interrupting.

“Can you breathe better now?”

—Not yet. You need to say my name.

“…”

—Hmm?

“Ahn-jae hyung.”

Calling him ‘hyung’ was impulsive. This form of address was almost taboo usually. On the other side of the phone, even the breathing and laughter stopped abruptly. What was meant to help Seo Seo Ahn-jae breathe had ended up making Joo Seung-ha breathless instead. Joo Seung-ha chose to escape.

“Sunbae, I need to go. Work while breathing, okay?”

He hung up without waiting for a response. Joo Seung-ha leaned his arms on the steering wheel and lowered his head. He had just arrived at the office after an outside appointment, so there was no rush. While he was cooling down the heat that had risen, just as he was getting out of the car, his phone buzzed briefly.

[When do you finish today?]

After looking at Seo Ahn-jae’s question, he put the phone straight into his pocket. Anyway, Seo Ahn-jae would be working overtime today, so they wouldn’t have proper time to meet up later. But this was also a problem. No matter how busy, Seo Ahn-jae tried to see Joo Seung-ha every day. He usually had lots of overtime and evening meetings even before, so they used to meet only once or twice a week. Now he tried to see Joo Seung-ha’s face even if just for a moment every day.

Sometimes he really did just come to see Joo Seung-ha’s face briefly before leaving. Why waste time like that? Like the messages, it was hard to understand and adjust to. This question probably meant he would make time to come see Joo Seung-ha’s face again, which wasn’t particularly welcome. After Joo Seung-ha accepted his feelings, Seo Ahn-jae approached relentlessly like an unbridled colt. Is this what dating is like? Having thoughts typical of a lifelong single person, Joo Seung-ha belatedly replied.

[I’m not finishing today.]

***

Secretary Choi, who came to get approval for a report before Seo Ahn-jae left for an external meeting, had to wait a moment before knocking. A small laugh could be heard from inside. Secretary Choi looked around to check if he had come to the wrong place instead of the CEO’s office, but this was definitely the CEO’s frosted glass door. Then the laughter must have been Seo Ahn-jae’s…

Secretary Choi coldly considered who the CEO might be talking to. Had he lost his mind? The company was in chaos due to errors in their new game that took years to develop. After hesitating for a long while, he entered with trepidation. The first thing he saw was Seo Ahn-jae quietly staring at his phone screen. Secretary Choi carefully observed his condition, debating whether to call out to him. He remained motionless like a doll, focused on whatever content he was reading.

“CEO?”

“What is it?”

Though he answered, his gaze remained fixed on his phone.

“I’ve submitted an approval document that needs immediate review.”

It could have been done over the phone, but the department head had been whining about urgency, so they came in to check the CEO’s external meeting schedule too. But they hadn’t expected the CEO, who should have been looking at new game-related materials, to be so absorbed in his phone. What on earth was he looking at? Secretary Choi couldn’t resist and slightly raised his heels to peek at his phone screen. A message window?

“Is it urgent?”

Startled by Seo Ahn-jae’s sudden question, Secretary Choi quickly lowered his feet. Then hurriedly checked his pad, pretending he hadn’t been nosy and looked.

“It’s a payment for an external vendor, and they’re quite good at their work so their schedule is booked for years. They happened to have an opening this time, so they want to sign a contract quickly.”

“Even so, you shouldn’t submit a report without properly checking the figures.”

Secretary Choi was startled and clicked through the Ipad screen. They quickly moved their hands and eyes, flipping through the report they had only skimmed. Ah, was there a calculation error? Seo Ahn-jae was a numbers genius, so he had warned them several times not to make mistakes. That was why they usually double-checked everything, but this time they had only given it a cursory look because it was supposedly urgent. Secretary Choi mentally blamed the department head who submitted the report, figuring this approval was probably lost.

“I’m sorry. I should have checked.”

“Yes. Please check next time. And let the reporting team know as well.”

Contrary to expectations, Seo Ahn-jae dismissed it lightly and signed the approval. Secretary Choi tilted his head to one side in confusion. Oh? He doesn’t seem upset. He actually looked happy. So was that laugh earlier really because he was in a good mood?

“By the way, Secretary Choi doesn’t need to come to the external meeting. Instead, since I can’t attend the evening meeting, please chair the meeting and report to me separately later.”

It wasn’t unusual for Secretary Choi to attend meetings in Seo Ahn-jae’s place, but tonight’s meeting was about the problematic new game. For the past few days, Seo Ahn-jae had personally attended meetings every day to monitor the situation. They had expected him to want to hear about the progress today too. Did something really good happen? As Secretary Choi stood still, focusing intently, Seo Ahn-jae’s urging voice was heard.

“You don’t want to?”

“No, sir. Do you have other plans this evening?”

So he’s not working overtime today? Though it wouldn’t affect Secretary Choi’s overtime, when the CEO stayed late at the office, there was always a pile of work on his desk the next day.

“It’s not exactly plans, but I’ll be going out and coming back to the office.”

What kind of not-plans requires going out? As Secretary Choi struggled to understand, Seo Ahn-jae muttered his reason.

“I’m going out to breathe.”

Because he can’t breathe in the office? Ah, well. Every office is stuffy. It’s not usually about the air either. Secretary Choi nodded, trying to understand based on his own experience. Still, he hadn’t expected even the CEO to feel suffocated from not wanting to work. Just as they were feeling a sense of camaraderie thinking ‘he’s just like me,’ Seo Ahn-jae looked at him curiously.

“You look like you understand?”

“Well, working in the same space continuously can get suffocating sometimes.”

“Oh, the office is suffocating? Then just say so. I can arrange for you to work in wide-open outdoor spaces anytime.”

“Does the company have such positions?”

“Of course not. You’d have to quit.”

“…”

So he was in a bad mood after all.

“I’m joking. There’s no need to freeze up like that.”

What’s this? Is he really in a good mood?

“But if mistakes keep happening because you’re feeling suffocated, we might really need to consider termination.”

This time it was his usual cold tone, with no trace of joking. Secretary Choi tensed and lowered their head. Damn, his mood is doing somersaults and spinning tops. He used to rarely show his emotions, so they just had to work diligently, but lately, he was different. Recently, he was unpredictable. Just like now.

Ding! With a notification sound, he checked his phone and suddenly broke into a wide smile. His already handsome face became even more striking when he smiled like that, and Secretary Choi couldn’t help but stare. Such smiles were truly rare. So he found himself asking without thinking.

“Must be good news?”

“Not really.”

Seo Ahn-jae answered casually as he stood up, but the smile remained on his face. Before grabbing his coat, he checked his phone once more and muttered to himself.

“Always so soft-hearted.”

Secretary Choi left the room pretending not to have heard, but slightly furrowed his brow. Whoever this soft-hearted person was, Seo Ahn-jae seemed absolutely delighted about it.

***

[I finish at 7.]

Feeling guilty about his harsh response earlier, Joo Seung-ha finally told Seo Ahn-jae his ending time. But he hadn’t replied expecting to see him today. Meeting just to see each other’s faces without any particular reason still seemed inefficient and incomprehensible to Joo Seung-ha. He didn’t expect Seo Ahn-jae to keep doing it either. That was why when Jjang Nuna noona called as he was leaving work, he easily offered, “Should I come?”

—No, you don’t need to. The guardian isn’t coming to take Dorami right away. They said they’ll come when they have time… sigh

Though she said it was fine, Jjang Nuna noona sighed in frustration. While the shelter’s purpose was to protect abandoned dogs, their top priority was helping them find families. Even though dogs’ lifespans are shorter than humans’, living together for possibly over ten years meant they had to carefully consider the guardian’s situation before allowing adoption.

Still, some dogs were returned. Dogs returned just days after adoption were actually better cases—they wouldn’t have formed attachments yet. The worst was when dogs were abandoned after spending a long time with their owners. Dorami was a large white dog who had been adopted six years ago. Suddenly, the owner contacted them asking to temporarily take care of Dorami, requesting long-term fostering.

Since there had been two previous cases where owners asked for temporary care and then completely cut contact, they couldn’t simply accept with open hearts. Dogs who had only lived indoors struggled to adjust to outdoor kennels. The bigger issue was the emotional trauma for the dog. Some dogs who were abandoned like this developed depression.

—For now, I asked them to come to Darae’s cafe when they have time. We need to hear their situation and explain ours too.

“Let me know when they’re coming. I’ll come too.”

Jjang Nuna and Darae were too kind—they’d probably agree if someone just complained a little. He needed to be there to match nonsense with nonsense if the person started talking nonsense. After hanging up, he left the office to go home, but his mood had sunk even lower. Why is human love so short-lived? Of course, most people who adopt pets do take responsibility until the end, but compared to pets’ feelings, it’s a crude excuse.

Because pets were 100%. All animals maintained 100% love until the end. Working at the shelter sometimes led to this kind of distrust in humans. Especially since love was something he was experiencing now, it made Joo Seung-ha feel even more down. It wasn’t that he didn’t trust Seo Ahn-jae’s love. Honestly, he found it harder to trust his own love.

“Did something happen?”

A sudden question came from behind just as Joo Seung-ha was turning to head to the subway station. Startled, he turned to find Seo Ahn-jae standing beside the company entrance. A casual pose with his weight on one leg. Was it because of his height and build? Even outdoors, his presence seemed to fill every space he was in.

“When did you get here?”

“Just now.”

“How did you know I was in the office?”

As a salesperson, some days he would just head home directly from outside meetings. At Joo Seung-ha’s puzzlement, Seo Ahn-jae approached with a silent laugh. When he came within inches in just a few steps, Joo Seung-ha hesitantly stepped back. But he couldn’t fully retreat. Seo Ahn-jae caught his arm, stopping him.

“I put a location tracker on your phone.”

“…Really?”

“Wow, you believed me right away. I didn’t know you trusted me this much.”

When Joo Seung-ha frowned, Seo Ahn-jae raised his hand and gently rubbed as if smoothing out the wrinkles. Joo Seung-ha backed away like a startled rabbit, suddenly realizing they were outside. However, with his arm caught, he couldn’t move far away.

“What’s wrong? Why are you in a bad mood?”

Did I show it on my face? Joo Seung-ha shook his head, hiding his surprise.

“Nothing’s wrong. More importantly, let go, Sunbae. We’re outside.”

However, Seo Ahn-jae actually gripped tighter, as if provoked by that statement. Ah, this guy. Already attracting enough attention. As Joo Seung-ha glanced around nervously about to say something, Seo Ahn-jae released his hand first.

“You don’t like it outside?”

“No.”

“Why?”

As if he doesn’t know? Joo Seung-ha held back his retort and glanced around again. Passersby were turning to look at Seo Ahn-jae.

“People are watching.”

“Okay.”