PEN Vol 2 Ch. 17

“Looks like you’ve got a fever.”

Cheon Sejoo spoke, furrowing his brow as he looked at Sejin, whose face had turned bright red.

Even as Sejoo’s cold hand brushed against his forehead, Sejin couldn’t calm his rapidly beating heart and could only leave his mouth open. Before he could even process the strange sensation coursing through him, Cheon Sejoo was gone from his sight. It was only after Cheon Sejoo started driving that Sejin came back to his senses, though he still felt dazed.

What had been a mild fever in the morning had now flared into a full-blown high fever due to the aftermath of the violence and excitement during the day. Caught between the sudden heat that surged through his body and the chills that made him tremble, Sejin felt dizzy.

For about thirty minutes, he just sat there, leaning back against the seat, focusing only on breathing. Thanks to light traffic, they arrived at the house without any delays, and just like before, Cheon Sejoo carried Sejin on his back.

Exhausted from the short drive home, Sejin lay weakly against Sejoo’s back, barely able to hold on as they made their way upstairs to the apartment. By the time Sejin was laid down on his bed, he was only half-conscious.

“Kwon Sejin.”

Realizing that Sejin’s condition was worse than expected, Cheon Sejoo shook him gently to wake him up.

Sejin opened his blurry eyes and looked at the man who was frowning. The man’s eyes were somehow filled with concern. It was the kind of expression as if he were wondering whether Sejin had been hurt badly somewhere.

Normally, Sejin would have thought such an expression was insincere. But now, he couldn’t think that way anymore. Realizing that Cheon Sejoo was genuinely worried about him, Sejin quietly spoke.

“It’s just growing pains….”

That’s what it seemed like, no matter how he looked at it. The recurring fever starting off mild and then spiking suddenly was exactly the same as the symptoms of the growing pains Sejin remembered from before. But Cheon Sejoo, upon hearing his words, loosened his frown and laughed as if the idea was ridiculous. He began unbuttoning Sejin’s clothes as he spoke.

“Are you a doctor now? Isn’t growing pains just your wishful thinking?”

“…….”

At this sudden return to his usual attitude, Sejin felt a surge of frustration. However, he didn’t have the energy to argue with Cheon Sejoo. Raising his hand to stop Cheon Sejoo, who was trying to help him change clothes, Sejin shook his head.

“I’ll wash up,” he muttered briefly, causing Cheon Sejoo to look down at him with a displeased expression.

“Can you even wash up on your own?”

“Probably….”

At Sejin’s weak response, Cheon Sejoo looked slightly concerned but then nodded. He helped Sejin sit up and lean against the bed, unbuttoned his school uniform, and quickly went to the kitchen and returned with a highchair. He placed the chair under the showerhead so that Sejin could sit while washing, then lifted Sejin, who had taken off his uniform, and gently placed him on the chair.

“If you feel dizzy or like you’re going to throw up, call me.”

“Okay…”

Sejin, his face flushed from the fever, nodded and turned on the water.

Ssshhh-

After confirming the steady stream of lukewarm water coming out of the shower, Cheon Sejoo left the bathroom.

Click.

Once the door closed, Cheon Sejoo let out the breath he had been holding.

While Sejin showered, Cheon Sejoo checked the temperature in Sejin’s room and found some fever-reducing medicine lying around the house. By the time he had placed the medicine on the bedside table along with some lukewarm water, Sejin had finished his shower and was coming out of the bathroom. Cheon Sejoo let out a soft sigh and walked into the dressing room, which was connected to the bathroom.

There stood Sejin, his whole body flushed red. His unkempt hair hung damply, and he leaned against the wall as he tried to put on his underwear. Seeing this, Cheon Sejoo quickly walked over.

“Hold onto me.”

He knelt in front of Sejin, who was wobbling. Although he hesitated for a moment, it became clear that Kwon Sejin was far too young for him to feel anything sexual toward him. Relieved by the fact that Sejin’s slender and pretty body didn’t stir anything in him, Sejoo helped him put on his underwear. After dressing him in a t-shirt, Cheon Sejoo brought him back to the bed and sat him down.

He dried Sejin’s hair, blow-drying it, but despite his efforts, Sejin didn’t feel completely fresh and dry; he was still damp and clammy. Cold sweat had gathered on his forehead.

After helping Sejin take the fever-reducing medicine, Cheon Sejoo laid him down in bed and pulled the blanket over him. Sejin, blinking dully, soon began to breathe softly as he drifted off to sleep.

Cheon Sejoo didn’t leave right away but instead stayed still for a moment, quietly watching Sejin. He was used to seeing Sejin frowning, squinting his eyes, and pouting his lips, but seeing him asleep like this, he looked like an angel that had descended from the heavens.

“Good night.”

Cheon Sejoo quietly bid Sejin farewell and stood up. But just as he was about to leave the room, something held him back. When he looked down, he saw Sejin’s small hand gripping the hem of his jacket.

It seemed he had grabbed it when Cheon Sejoo had moved him from the dressing room to the bed, and he was holding on so tightly that even now, deeply asleep, his fingers hadn’t loosened their grip.

Cheon Sejoo tried to release Sejin’s hand from his jacket.

Sejin’s skin felt hot to the touch.

It was such an obvious fact, but for some reason, it left a deep impression on him…

The warmth, which clearly proved that Sejin was alive, seemed to fill the emptiness in Cheon Sejoo’s heart. In the end, Cheon Sejoo gave up on leaving Sejin’s side and leaned back against the bed.

Today had been an exceptionally long day. A wave of delayed exhaustion washed over him. Cheon Sejoo ran his fingers roughly through his hair, messing it up as he closed his eyes.

There were often times when Cheon Sejoo had to spend days following someone or cleaning up after them. This time, too, he had been assigned to track someone’s every move, so he had spent several nights without sleep, and when he returned, he hadn’t expected that Sejin would feel upset because of it.

It seemed like Sejin was angry because he hadn’t kept his promise to help him with his studies. Sejin’s reaction made Cheon Sejoo think that it would be better for Sejin to just study on a schedule at a proper academy, so he brought it up. However, Sejin had gotten even more upset, and he stormed off, muttering curses at him.

Though he had been momentarily taken aback by the situation, he went back to his office to finish organizing some reports, when he received a call from an unknown number. Finding it suspicious, he didn’t answer at first, but then a message arrived.

– Hello, this is Seo Bohyung, the homeroom teacher of Class 2, Section 3 at East Seoul Boys High School. Are you Kwon Sejin’s guardian? There’s something urgent I need to discuss with you regarding Sejin, so please call me as soon as you see this message.

Cheon Sejoo’s heart sank when he saw the message from Seo Bohyung.

There was no way the school could have known his number, and it was hard to believe Kwon Sejin would have introduced him as his guardian. And so, this led Cheon Sejoo to think something must have happened to Sejin, and that someone had gone through his phone to randomly find his number. He left the office immediately and called back, only to hear shocking news.

—It’s just that Sejin… well, he beat one of his classmates pretty badly in the cafeteria, using a tray…

“…What?”

Taken aback, Cheon Sejoo asked for more details and soon learned that Kwon Sejin had smashed the tray onto some kids who had been harassing him. To say he wasn’t shocked after hearing it would have been a lie.

The thought of Sejin, someone who could barely manage to take care of himself, had done something that might require to pay settlement money seemed absurd. But, in truth, more than that, Cheon Sejoo found it surprising, and even admirable.

Kwon Sejin is different from Hye-in.

Cheon Sejoo couldn’t help but think, letting out a bitter smile.

Unlike Hye-in, who had withered away under the weight of other children’s violence, Sejin refused to break…

And in that moment, Cheon Sejoo felt a deep sense of relief.

As soon as he finished the call with Sejin’s homeroom teacher, Cheon Sejoo immediately contacted the lawyer who had defended him in court five years ago and asked for help. He then had Yoon Chuljoo retrieve the CCTV footage from the day Sejin had been bullied by Lee Haegyun.

Since he remembered the exact date and place, and the security of public office databases was poorly protected, it didn’t take long to obtain the evidence. After that, he quickly changed his clothes and headed straight to the school.

There was no reason to worry.

Kwon Sejin was under Cheon Sejoo’s protection.

It was only natural for him to go and pick Sejin up.

When he finally arrived at the school and saw the wrecked state Kwon Sejin was in, Cheon Sejoo felt genuine anger. Even though Sejin often spoke informally at him or raised his voice at him, he had always seemed small, like a small baby chick chirping and crying noisily. But now, Sejin’s appearance was an utter mess.

His hair was disheveled, his bruised cheek was swollen and bluish from being beaten, and his ankles and calves were covered in bruises.

The tough kid, who usually had a snappy comeback, now couldn’t say a word, and only looked up at him with a pitiful expression, which made Cheon Sejoo’s chest ache.

If Sejin was this physically affected by the aftermath of violence, how had Hye-in managed to endure this for over two years?

The fact that she had withstood it for so long meant Hye-in had done everything she could. And with that realization came a renewed sense of admiration for Sejin.

And yet, as the following conversation unfolded, Cheon Sejoo also felt a strong sense of futility.

Everything was so simple.

It was a problem that could have been solved easily. To think that he hadn’t been able to do this—to resolve something so simple—and had let Hye-in slip away because of it…

Of course, their circumstances back then were different. At the time, Cheon Sejoo had only been a medical resident. He hadn’t had the means to hire a lawyer from the best law firm in the country, nor was he in a position to intimidate the perpetrators with his influence.

But back then, he had so many people around him. Among his friends were those with family members who were lawyers, some whose fathers were high-ranking police officers, and others who had brothers working as prosecutors. If Cheon Sejoo had reached out and asked for help, they would have gladly given everything they had to assist him.

But now, there was no one left by his side.

And so, for the first time in a long while, Cheon Sejoo found himself wanting to die.

He thought about dying alone and falling into hell.

Even though it wasn’t raining, it felt like he was suffocating.

What pulled Cheon Sejoo out of the depths of his thoughts was the warmth of Sejin, who was clinging to his back.  Burning with fever, the weight and presence of the eighteen-year-old boy hanging onto his neck easily brought Cheon Sejoo back from his thoughts of death to this world.

‘Don’t just take it—hit back next time as well. Don’t let those b*stards bully you. No matter what you do, it will be fine, just don’t be the only one who gets hurt.’

That was, in fact, the words he had wanted to say to Hye-in. However, Hye-in was no longer in this world, so Cheon Sejoo said it to Sejin instead.

After losing Hye-in, Cheon Sejoo lived with the belief that the world wouldn’t allow him to become a good person. Every time he tried to walk the path Hye-in had wanted for him, the whole world seemed to violently oppose him.

With Hye-in’s death and his fateful encounter with Shin Gyoyeon, the future version of himself that Cheon Sejoo had once envisioned disappeared, leaving only a dark shadow in its place. All that remained for him was a harsh life, where he had to throw away his own life to kill someone else.

For Cheon Sejoo, Sejin felt like an opportunity.

An opportunity to ease the guilt that lingered in his heart after losing Hye-in. An opportunity to be the kind of person she had wanted him to be, even if only for a short while. An opportunity to be a good person to at least one person in this world…

Cheon Sejoo ignored the sharp sting in his chest as he lifted his face that was buried in his hands. With weary eyes, he turned his gaze at Sejin, who lay asleep on the bed.

Though Sejin resembled Cheon Hye-in in no way, to Cheon Sejoo, Sejin’s existence now felt no different from that of his sister.

He was projecting Hye-in onto Sejin.

And so, Cheon Sejoo decided that, from now on, he would dedicate all his strength to ensure Sejin’s happiness.

He would do everything in his power to make sure that Sejin wouldn’t leave his side filled with loneliness like Hye-in had…