PUCKD Ch 37

After the game, Shin Hojae was waiting for Ji Minchul, who was talking with the coach. The conversation inside was taking a long time.

All the other players had finished packing up and returned to the dorms. Doomin had been taken out of the starting lineup in the middle of the second period, showing signs of poor condition.

Shin Hojae found out about the article and the photo right after the second period ended, after the ejected Minchul was in the infirmary and Doomin had already gone back to the dorms.

Just reading the headline made his heart feel like it was beating irregularly. If even he, who wasn’t the subject of the article, felt this way, it wasn’t hard to imagine how Doomin must have felt upon seeing it.

Hojae slowly scrolled down, but as soon as he realized what the man in the photo was wearing, he closed the window without looking at the rest of it. He felt that Doomin wouldn’t want him to see that picture.

The atmosphere in the locker room was split in two. There was Lee Sanggon’s group, who were spewing curses about how disgusting it was, and Park Hyonghoon’s group, who were defending Doomin, saying it must be a malicious composite photo.

While doing so, both groups subtly gauged Shin Hojae’s reaction. However, Shin Hojae’s face was just hardened into a stiff expression. It was only natural, as he knew nothing at all.

Only after finding out did he begin to guess the context behind Na Daeil’s previously incomprehensible remarks.

Soon, the coaching staff and Head Coach Peter came in and calmed the players down, but the seeds of discord that had begun to spread quickly sprouted at the slightest provocation from the Tigers players.

The result was the ejection of Shin Hojae, Park Hyonghoon, Na Daeil, and Na Myungil. It was a good thing this was only a practice game; if it had been an official match, it could have led to a suspension for the next game.

Click. Just then, the door opened and Ji Minchul came out of the coach’s room.

Hojae stood up. He could see a cut near Minchul’s lip, an injury from trading blows with Na Daeil. Shin Hojae had a similar wound on his face. Thankfully, their protective gear had saved them from serious injury.

“What did you guys talk about?”

“Well, the usual nagging about being benched if this happens again, and a little about Doomin.”

Shin Hojae handed Ji Minchul his bag, which he had been holding for him.

“Thanks. Where’s Doomin?”

“At the dorms. Probably with Hyonghoon.”

“You’re heading there too, right?”

“Talk to me for a bit before that.”

The two sat down in the lobby of the arena, where all the lights were off. It was Shin Hojae who spoke first.

“Do you know anything?”

“…”

Minchul sat with his arms crossed, his eyes cast down. He seemed hesitant to speak.

“Tell me. I don’t want to make a mistake with Yook Doomin because I don’t know anything.”

He was sincere. It was also why he had waited for Ji Minchul instead of staying by Yook Doomin’s side with Hyonghoon.

He had intuitively sensed that this was no ordinary matter. And that the shock Doomin received must be immense.

He felt that if he stayed by Doomin’s side trying to comfort him without knowing anything, he might say the wrong thing. He didn’t want that.

Minchul’s lips parted slightly, and he slowly began to speak.

“…First of all, that photo is of Yook Doomin. It was taken when he was with the guy he’s dating now. It wasn’t taken against his will.”

“…”

“That’s as far as what Doomin confessed to Peter. I don’t know the details either.”

Amidst the disjointed, floating words that wouldn’t quite connect, Hojae noticed that Minchul had referred to Doomin’s lover as ‘that guy’.

As he stared at him quietly, Minchul ran a hand roughly through his short hair in frustration.

“Actually, there’s something I haven’t told you.”

“Yeah.”

“That day we had a team dinner in Canada, I was taking care of a drunk Yook Doomin and answered a call from his lover.”

“…”

“I didn’t answer at first, but the calls were so persistent, I figured I should at least tell them that Yook Doomin was passed out drunk. No, actually, that’s an excuse. I was just curious what kind of person Yook Doomin’s lover was. So I answered.”

A crease began to form between Hojae’s brows. Ji Minchul was undoubtedly talking about that night. The night after the team dinner, when he had gone down to the lounge bar by the pool to meet Kwon Junghyun.

“It was a man’s voice. Even though I clearly saw the saved name was ‘Lover’ with a heart next to it.”

“…”

“I was so shocked I ran out of there without even cleaning up. It wasn’t until I was outside that I realized I’d left the towel behind, but the room key was inside so I couldn’t get back in myself.”

Ji Minchul said, laughing bitterly.

Hojae remained quietly silent. He now clearly understood why the wet towel had been left on the bedsheets that day, and why Ji Minchul had been acting so awkwardly around Yook Doomin.

“It’s because of me.”

Minchul murmured quietly.

“I should have told Yook Doomin about what happened that day. And I should have told him that I don’t care whether he dates women or men.”

“…”

“I just pretended not to know because I thought Yook Doomin wanted to hide it. You know his personality. He doesn’t like to talk to us about dark things. One lie kept growing, and it became harder and harder for him to talk about it.”

“…”

“If he had been open about this ‘lover’ guy from the start, we would have noticed something before today’s incident. Don’t you think so too?”

The back of his neck felt cold. Hojae couldn’t answer.

He had never once seriously considered that Ji Minchul was thinking this way, or what kind of worries Yook Doomin might have.

He had been thinking only of himself the whole time. He had been so consumed by his own situation that he had no room to look around him. No, he had thought he didn’t need to.

I endured the sacrifice of being sponsored by Kwon Junghyun for you guys, so my problems are the most important. Subconsciously, that’s what he had been thinking.

Clues he had simply brushed aside now floated up one by one in his dizzy mind.

Yook Doomin, who kept trying to hide the existence of his lover; Ji Minchul, who was acting strangely during the training camp for anyone to see; and Yook Doomin’s boyfriend, whom he had clearly seen with his own eyes.

Ji Minchul said this was his fault, but it wasn’t. It was Shin Hojae’s fault.

At the very least, when he saw Yook Doomin’s boyfriend, he should have told Ji Minchul. He could have. But what had he done back then?

He chose to keep his mouth shut, afraid that his relationship with Kwon Junghyun would be exposed, that all the feelings he had for him would be revealed, that people would point their fingers at him in disgust.

The back of his neck felt cold. The thought that because he had kept his mouth shut, Yook Doomin was now the one being pointed at by others instead. An unpleasant sweat pooled in his palms, brought on by self-loathing.

Watching Shin Hojae, who was quietly looking down, Minchul suddenly remembered something and said.

“Come to think of it, what happened with that article about your father earlier? Sorry, I was so out of my mind with Doomin’s situation that I didn’t pay attention to your father’s.”

“…”

Hojae lifted his eyes and looked at Minchul’s face. His eyes were filled with pure concern.

He remembered when he had frantically flown back to Korea after hearing the news about his father. His two friends had grieved and hurt as if it were their own ordeal.

Among them, the sentimental Yook Doomin had cried a bucket of tears. Minchul and Doomin had even pooled their money to help with his father’s surgery fees, despite his firm refusals.

He ended up returning the money untouched, but he could never forget their gratitude at that moment.

“…That article was taken down.”

Ironically, Shin Hojae’s article was completely buried after Doomin’s article broke. In the midst of it all, the article had been discreetly deleted.

“Ah, looks like your call was effective. That’s a relief.”

Hojae’s heart grew even heavier. It felt as if he had covered up his own issue by exposing his friend’s shame.

“Doomin’s article has spread so much now that I don’t think deleting one will do any good. The comments on Doomin’s YouTube and social media are a total mess right now… Peter said he’d discuss it with the team officials, but honestly, I don’t expect the club to do anything.”

“…”

Hojae felt the same way.

In the past, whenever big or small problems arose, the club would either maintain a policy of non-response or, unable to withstand public pressure, would issue a response that was worse than nothing, only to get more backlash.

Since Yook Doomin and most of the club’s players didn’t have management, they were helplessly victimized by such incidents, which often led to a decline in their performance.

Just then, Hojae’s phone rang. It was Park Hyonghoon. Hojae switched the call to speakerphone so Minchul could listen in.

—Hojae, are you with Doomin right now, by any chance?

“What? Weren’t you with him?”

—Ugh. He’s not with you?! No, I was with him, and he got a call from his older brother, and his expression turned really bad. He said he wanted to be alone for a bit, and I couldn’t really say no… so I let him go, but it’s been 30 minutes and I can’t reach him!

Hojae met Minchul’s eyes.

With a hardened expression, Minchul picked up his own phone. It seemed he was trying to call Doomin right away, but when he didn’t answer, Minchul shook his head and ended the call.

“Did you see where he went?”

—I just thought he was stepping out in front of the dorm, but I can’t find him anywhere… Doomin isn’t thinking of doing anything strange, is he? No, fck, why should he have to suffer because of some fcking lunatic who photoshopped and spread a picture?!

“…We’ll start looking too.”

—Okay. Please let me know if you find him.

After promising to do so, Hojae hung up.

The dormitory where the players were staying was located a little way out from the city center. Thanks to that, the surrounding scenery was nice, but there were no shops open late outside the dorms. There was no place he could have gone after leaving the dorm.

Frustrated, Hojae called Yook Doomin. The slow ringing tone continued leisurely, oblivious to their situation.

Just then, Ji Minchul, who had been fiddling with his phone, shot up and said.

“Got a taxi. Let’s go.”

“Huh? Where?”

“Anmok Beach.”

Anmok Beach was one of the beaches close to the dorms. Shin Hojae stood up with him, bewildered, and asked.

“Yook Doomin is there? How did you know?”

“A GPS app.”

“What?”

“I installed one back in college because Yook Doomin used to get drunk and pass out on the street all the time.”

“…Ah, really?”

Shin Hojae followed behind Minchul with a frown.

He thought to himself that it was probably because of Ji Minchul that Doomin’s lover hated them.