SHUDDER 2

“…Please help.”

It was a desperate plea. At the same time, it was resignation, a wretched appeal.

Hwang Jangyeop paused his steps and looked back. Gijeong was already staring at him. His eyes seemed to yearn desperately for help, yet they carried a hint of having already half-given up.

It was as if Gijeong knew Hwang Jangyeop might brush him off and there’d be nothing he could do about it. In truth, they had only met briefly that afternoon, barely brushing past each other. The small kindness Hwang Jangyeop had shown to the hungry Gijeong didn’t mean they were bound by some deep connection.

Yet, Gijeong was grasping at straws. He was clinging to even the faintest thread of hope. In the pitch-black night, fleeing from a drunken father’s blows to survive, he had nowhere to go. Facing the cold wind with a crying, sick younger sibling, he had nothing to offer.

But Hwang Jangyeop’s response cut through that straw without mercy.

“Why should I?”

It was genuine. There was no intent to mock. He simply, sincerely questioned why he should help the Gijeong brothers, whom he’d never even met before today.

Is there anything more troublesome than kindness? There’s no obligation to show it. No one could force it on anyone else.

Yet Gijeong kept pleading. It was all he could do. All he had left was to cast aside pride and dignity and beg.

“He keeps vomiting. He just keeps vomiting.”

Hwang Jangyeop looked down coldly at Gijeong, who seemed ready to grab his pant leg. Then, as if it was none of his business, he turned away.

He walked off as if escaping. There was no need for it, but he felt that hesitating even slightly would get him caught. No matter how many times he thought it over, he wanted no part in such a bothersome mess.

If Gijeong had been a woman, things might have been different. Hwang Jangyeop wouldn’t have hesitated to grab the delicate wrist of a pitiful girl crying over her sick sibling.

But this was different. What did he care about the troubles of some guy with no use to him? No concern, no interest.

“…Damn it.”

Yet why did he feel so uneasy? It was like he hadn’t wiped properly. It was all because of Gijeong’s eyes. Those half-enlightened eyes that had stared at him when he declared no boats would come. Gijeong’s face, yearning for him with that look, kept flickering in his mind.

Sometimes, people do things they’d never normally do. Impulsive choices even they can’t understand. Hwang Jangyeop was no exception.

Hwang Jangyeop stopped dead in his tracks just before his house’s gate. He looked back, but the harbor was too far now, and the Gijeong brothers were out of sight.

“Ha, damn it.”

He wasn’t the one who’d done anything cruel to them. Their pitiful situation wasn’t worth the hassle of dealing with them for even a night.

Yet his feet were already trudging back to the harbor. His steps, slow at first, soon turned into a sprint. His worn sneakers flapped as if they’d fall off any moment.

When Hwang Jangyeop arrived at the harbor, panting heavily, Gijeong was trying to lift his weary sibling onto his back. He grabbed Kiyoung by the nape, yanking him up. The boy dangled limply like a hunted rabbit.

Hwang Jangyeop hoisted Kiyoung lightly and strode toward his house. He offered no explanation to Gijeong. He just kept cursing himself for doing something so out of character.

Gijeong, dazed, watched Hwang Jangyeop’s back, then slowly stood and followed. The waves that had threatened to swallow him crashed just shy of his feet.

“Do I have to serve meals to your women now too? Get that girl out of here!”

The moment Hwang Jangyeop stepped into the house, his mother rushed out from the kitchen, yelling at the top of her lungs. Ignoring her nagging, Hwang Jangyeop handed Kiyoung, slung over his arm, to Gijeong. Then he turned to look at his room’s door. A pair of shoes lay scattered beneath it. Jung-hwa, that girl, never could take off her shoes neatly.

His mother, as if waiting for her son’s return, unleashed a torrent of pent-up complaints. Amid the commotion, the closed door swung open. Jung-hwa, the daughter of the sashimi restaurant by the harbor, poked her head out, smiling brightly.

“Oppa, I’m here.”

“You’re here.”

That was the extent of Hwang Jangyeop’s greeting. Jung-hwa, who’d taken over his room, didn’t seem particularly welcome or bothersome.

Whether Hwang Jangyeop listened or not, his mother poured out grievances about laundry flying off because it wasn’t clipped properly, the boiler acting up with hot water coming and going, and the room’s fluorescent lights being dim past their replacement date.

She only noticed the Gijeong brothers after exhausting her complaints. By then, Hwang Jangyeop was at the water tap, shirt off and tucked into his waistband, washing up.

“Who are these kids? Dragging in one or two girls every day wasn’t enough, now you’re bringing in freeloaders too, you brat!”

Hwang Jangyeop didn’t even acknowledge his mother’s scolding. He was used to her constant griping.

Gijeong stood by the metal gate, silently watching Hwang Jangyeop scrub his neck and ears. Even as his mother approached, calling them freeloaders and parasites, he stood firm. In their desperate situation, with no place to rest comfortably, he was used to such blatant disdain and hostility. It was something he always braced for.

As Hwang Jangyeop dumped the soapy water, Jung-hwa, who’d been watching him fondly, hurried out with a towel. Before she could offer it, he wiped his face roughly with the shirt from his waistband. Then he flung the wet shirt at Jung-hwa’s face. She squealed softly, whining about the smell and dirt but giggling all the while.

Even then, Hwang Jangyeop’s mother didn’t tire. She kept pointing at the Gijeong brothers, openly treating them like leeches. Gijeong held Kiyoung tightly, covering his ears and bowing his head, enduring the insults of a lonely old woman with no one else to vent to.

“Enough already. You’re so damn loud.”

Her relentless tirade stopped at his irritated interruption. Hwang Jangyeop strode toward Gijeong, who was stuck between staying and leaving, and grabbed his arm tightly. Gijeong lifted his bowed head to meet his gaze. Hwang Jangyeop looked at him for a moment, then dragged him into his room without a word. The grip was so rough that Gijeong stumbled in without even taking off his sneakers.

“Oh, I can’t live like this! I can’t go on!”

Outside the closed door, Hwang Jangyeop’s mother wailed as if for all to hear. But no one paid her complaints any mind.

“…”

The moment they entered Hwang Jangyeop’s room, his scent hit hard. The salty, fishy, damp smell of the sea. A dry, sunbaked harshness mixed with the thick musk of something fermented in the shade. An intense, volatile, wild aura filled the room, impossible to pin down to one thing.

It was the scent of a male. Perhaps because Jung-hwa had been rolling around all day, a sweet cosmetic smell mingled with it, making the original scent stand out even more sharply. The smell clung to the mucous membranes with every breath, freezing Gijeong in place. That’s why he stood awkwardly by the door, overwhelmed by the force of another male’s presence, a force that crushed his own.

“What are you standing there for? Sit.”

Hwang Jangyeop grabbed the hesitant Gijeong by the collar and forced him to sit on the floor. Only then did Gijeong snap out of it, laying the groaning Kiyoung on the blanket Jung-hwa had spread out.

As he tried to cover the shivering Kiyoung with the blanket, he noticed it was damp. It wasn’t just water—it had a subtle stickiness. Looking closer, he saw women’s underwear and condom wrappers scattered carelessly across the floor.

“Oppa, who are these kids?”

Jung-hwa eyed the Gijeong brothers, who’d taken her spot, with curious eyes. There was a hint of wariness as she scanned Gijeong, but no hostility. It was as if she’d learned Hwang Jangyeop let anyone into his room when he felt like it—mostly women, no doubt.

“Don’t chatter uselessly. Get some plum juice.”

Hwang Jangyeop, checking Kiyoung’s complexion, nodded toward the kitchen. Jung-hwa pouted but got up.

Soon, she returned with a bowl full of plum concentrate, carefully carrying it so as not to spill a drop and handing it to Hwang Jangyeop.

He propped up Kiyoung’s upper body and fed him the juice. The liquid pooled in the boy’s pale lips, trickling down his chin as he struggled to swallow. The blanket and pants got hopelessly wet, but Hwang Jangyeop didn’t care. With unusual patience, he tilted the bowl slowly, bit by bit.

Each time the plum juice flowed down Kiyoung’s throat, his small chest heaved painfully. Grimacing at the sour taste, he gradually relaxed. His breathing steadied.

“Kids are like that. If you don’t clean up after them, they can’t even shit properly.”

Hwang Jangyeop muttered, looking at the wheezing Kiyoung. It wasn’t clear if he was talking to himself or meant for someone to hear.

Scratching his chiseled abdomen, Hwang Jangyeop sprawled on the floor. Then he warned Gijeong, who was gently stroking the sleeping Kiyoung’s hair.

“I’m letting you stay here for free just tonight, so know that. Next time, you’re out of luck.”

Was that condition only for the Gijeong brothers? Probably not. Jung-hwa, or anyone else, wouldn’t sleep in Hwang Jangyeop’s room for free either. Just a guess, but he felt certain.

Hwang Jangyeop grabbed the ankle of Jung-hwa, who was kneading Kiyoung’s sleeping cheeks, and yanked her toward him. She burst into giggles. Turning, she burrowed into his arms.

Hwang Jangyeop lifted her skirt, heedless of who was watching. As he grabbed her lace panties, Jung-hwa grinned and raised her hips. The panties rolled down her pale legs, catching awkwardly at her knees.

He slid his knee between her thighs, tearing off her blouse. A button, ripped off by his rough hands, rolled to Gijeong’s feet. Gijeong flinched instinctively.

“Turn off the light, kid.”

Hwang Jangyeop, about to bury his face in Jung-hwa’s chest, paused and growled at Gijeong, who was trying to ignore them. His voice was already hoarse. Gijeong quietly swallowed, stood, and turned off the light. Then he covered Kiyoung’s ears tightly with both hands and tried to sleep.

“Mmm… ngh… ahh…”

Beaten by his father and chilled by the cold wind, Gijeong’s body was exhausted. Yet he couldn’t sleep easily. Covering Kiyoung’s ears meant he had to hear every sound in the room. The woman’s moans, warped by arousal, clung sweetly to his ears. No matter how he tried to ignore them, it was useless. The more he tried, the sharper his awareness became.

Finally, he sat up quietly. He cautiously removed his hands from Kiyoung’s ears. The boy was so deeply asleep he didn’t stir, breathing evenly.

Just in case, Gijeong tore tissue, rolled it into balls, and gently stuffed them into Kiyoung’s ears. He pulled the damp blanket over him carefully. After tending to his sibling’s sleep, he tiptoed past Hwang Jangyeop and Jung-hwa, entangled together.

Even in the dark, Hwang Jangyeop’s back, pressing down on Jung-hwa, was vivid. Moonlight from the small window gleamed on his firm buttocks and broad thighs. Each thrust tensed his dense muscles. The woman beneath him groaned, and the starving beast attacked more ferociously, greedily sating itself. The wet, lewd sounds of flesh pounding filled the air. Gijeong’s shoulders shrank.

Soon, he fled the room. The slightly open door closed softly. In that moment, the outside breeze sent goosebumps across Jung-hwa’s wet body. Hwang Jangyeop pinned her writhing form flat with his body and intensified his thrusts. He didn’t care who saw or came and went.

“Ahh, ah, ngh, oppa, oh, ahh… haaah!”

Racing toward climax, Hwang Jangyeop suddenly pulled out. His member, slick with clear fluid, twitched like a volcano about to erupt. Jung-hwa, left empty, rubbed her knees together in frustration.

Hwang Jangyeop rubbed his near-bursting member against her thigh. His jaw clenched, and his teeth ground repeatedly. Soon, his member erupted white. Thick semen filled her round navel, stretching up to her chin.

“Ugh, grrr.”

“… Mm.”

Jung-hwa softly moaned, stroking his flushed member. Having poured out every last drop, Hwang Jangyeop collapsed on the floor as if done, turning his back.

It was always like this. Once his desires were met, he’d lose all warmth and turn cold. Jung-hwa should’ve been used to it, but she slapped his thick thigh and lay on it. She teased, kneading his unyielding calf.

“Oppa, just take me in and live with me. Hm?”

“Why’re you spouting nonsense you never did before? Shut up and sleep.”

Hwang Jangyeop snapped irritably, shaking his thigh to shoo her off. Jung-hwa, who’d known him for years, wasn’t clueless. She knew plenty had clung to him half-jokingly, half-seriously, only to be cast off completely.

When a man and woman had seen and done it all, only one thing remained. The whole world knew that eternal truth, except, it seemed, Hwang Jangyeop.

It was odd. He swung his desires so freely, yet no rumors of him fathering a child ever surfaced. Despite acting like a beast in human skin, he seemed to lack the instinct to reproduce.

Jung-hwa burrowed into his arms again, whispering ticklishly.

“When you get old, won’t you need someone to scratch your back? Hm?”

“Why’re you being so damn annoying today? Lie down and sleep while I’m being nice.”

Hwang Jangyeop glared fiercely. Jung-hwa pouted but stubbornly used his arm as a pillow. He shoved her away with his hip and turned toward the door, crossing his arms tightly.

Exhausted from the act, he drifted to sleep. Suddenly, a splashing sound came from outside. Or perhaps it had been there for a while, unnoticed amid their frenzy. It sounded like someone washing something.

He bolted upright. Jung-hwa, startled, asked what was wrong. Over her shoulder, he checked the corner. Only Kiyoung’s groans were audible; Gijeong was gone. Unable to wait, Hwang Jangyeop grabbed the doorknob.

“I said no boats are coming tomorrow, you damn idiot! Stop being a nuisance and sleep!”

Flinging the door open, he roared at Gijeong, crouched by the tap. The furious bellow echoed through the house and the entire island village.

Gijeong flinched at the sudden shout and looked back. His state was pitiful. In just white underwear, he was scrubbing his uniform, soiled with vomit and plum juice. In the dead of night, when the village was asleep.

For once, Hwang Jangyeop had shown kindness, only for one to groan in pain and the other to disturb his sleep with late-night laundry.

“…I’m almost done.”

After a glance, Gijeong resumed splashing water, washing his uniform. Knowing Hwang Jangyeop was glaring at him like a ghost, he crouched even lower.

It was absurd. Despite knowing shame and fear, Gijeong’s stubbornness was unyielding. It was as if he expected a boat to arrive from the mainland tomorrow, and he’d wear his clean uniform to school.

Soon, Gijeong dumped the water and wrung out his uniform. Hwang Jangyeop, glaring discontentedly, slammed the door shut.

“…”

Gijeong, staring at the closed door, resumed moving. He shook out the wet uniform and hung it carefully on the clothesline alongside Hwang Jangyeop’s underwear and t-shirt, securing it with clips to keep it from blowing away. Though damp, the constant breeze would make it wearable by morning.

Shivering in the harsh wind, Gijeong adjusted his slipping glasses with reddened hands. If he didn’t go inside soon, he’d catch a cold for sure.

He started toward the room but paused. Hwang Jangyeop’s sneakers by the door caught his eye. Worn so often, the heels were crushed, and the leather was splitting. Forgetting to enter, Gijeong stared at the worn shoes.

When Hwang Jangyeop woke, the Gijeong brothers were gone. Only the blanket Kiyoung had used was neatly folded by the wall. Jung-hwa, naked, was curled up asleep, occasionally giggling in her dreams.

Sitting up, he reached for a cigarette, then remembered he was out. Scratching his head irritably, he went outside. A cool breeze slipped through the open door, making Jung-hwa frown and squirm. She rolled toward the blanket. Hwang Jangyeop, watching, gave a wry chuckle. True to form, Jung-hwa would linger until bored, then leave.

Closing the door, he looked for his sneakers. Only Jung-hwa’s shoes sat neatly by the door. About to ask his mother, emerging from the kitchen, if she’d seen them, he spotted his familiar sneakers on the low roof.

He didn’t question why they were there; he just thought to grab them. The roof was low enough for a tall man like him to reach easily, though others would’ve struggled on tiptoes.

Grabbing the sneakers, his brow furrowed. They were soaking wet. Turning them over, he snapped at his mother, scooping miso from a jar.

“Why’d you soak perfectly good shoes!”

“You think I did that, you brat!”

His mother shot back, brandishing a miso-covered spoon. She glared, grumbling about useless offspring. Clicking his tongue, he examined the shoes.

They were ones he’d worn carelessly, planning to toss when the soles gave out. He’d never washed them properly. Yet they seemed cleaner than last night. The yellowish stains remained, but they faintly smelled of laundry soap.

Suddenly, he recalled Gijeong, crouched by the tap last night, washing his uniform. Glancing at the clothesline, four idle clips swayed in the breeze.

He saw Gijeong again at the small shop by the harbor. It was a tiny store with few items, but it had everything needed. The owner spent more time dusting off goods than serving customers. Some dust couldn’t be shaken off, no matter how much she tried. Most items were near or past their expiration dates, but in this small village, that hardly mattered.

Hwang Jangyeop ducked slightly, as usual, to enter the shop. There weren’t many places in the village where he could stand tall. Without making a sound, his presence was unmistakable, and the shop owner turned with a warm smile.

“Jangyeop, you’re here?”

He only nodded as she quickly pulled out a plastic chair. Just past thirty, she’d come to the island nearly twenty years ago and lived alone, unpaired. Perhaps that’s why she treated Hwang Jangyeop, whom she’d known since childhood, like her own kin.

Hwang Jangyeop was more familiar with her scent than his own mother’s. When his mother left and didn’t return, his father, unable to leave a young boy alone or take him to sea, would often bring him to her, saying, “Look after the kid.”

Despite personal matters, the shop owner was the kindest woman in the village. Except for the forbidden bond with Hwang Jangyeop’s late father, which made her an enemy to his mother. Perhaps she’d been devoted to caring for a child whose mother was as good as absent. At some point, the three of them naturally ate dinner together and slept side by side. Even after his mother returned and caused a scene, the strange dual household seemed to continue.

No one meant to place blame. To his mother, Hwang Jangyeop himself might seem complicit, so who could blame whom? Now, long after his father’s death, his mother and the shop owner refused to look at each other, closing their eyes if they crossed paths. He just didn’t want to be another reason for their tiresome feud.

Hwang Jangyeop deftly grabbed four packs of cigarettes from the display. He pulled crumpled bills from his pocket and placed them on the counter. The shop owner handed him two soy milks. When he hesitated, she stuffed them into his pocket.

He sighed in resignation, looking at his bulging pocket, then abruptly left as he’d come.

“Don’t overwork yourself. Come back when you have time.”

“Going.”

He replied reluctantly to her affectionate farewell as she followed him a few steps.

Then, Gijeong appeared, walking down the opposite slope, holding his younger sibling’s hand tightly. It was the first time he’d seen them since that night. The little one, as if never sick, hopped around, chattering endlessly. Still, whether from illness or hunger, the child was thinner than others their age.

Spotting Hwang Jangyeop, Gijeong stopped short. Hwang Jangyeop was opening a cigarette pack. He lit one, took a long drag, glanced at Gijeong, then looked away. It was a glance as indifferent as one given to a stray dog.

Gijeong bowed silently. He gently pressed his sibling’s head to bow too. Kiyoung looked up and said brightly, “Hello!” Unable to ignore it, Hwang Jangyeop nodded.

“Wait here.”

Gijeong left Kiyoung by the shop and went inside alone. The boy stared up at Hwang Jangyeop, eyes hopeful for some response. Hwang Jangyeop met the eager gaze briefly, then exhaled a puff of smoke. As the acrid scent spread, Kiyoung coughed, covering his nose and mouth. Smirking slightly, Hwang Jangyeop waved the smoke away and peered into the shop.