SPM 1.4

Before he knew it, tears had welled up in his large eyes. Ian asked with trembling lips, unable to hide his shaking voice.

“Do I really have to go…?”

It was a timid refusal offered with difficulty. But even though tears were brimming in her son’s eyes, about to spill down at any moment, Song Joo-hee looked at him and spoke with an even firmer face and stern voice.

“Of course.”

Finally, tears poured down Ian’s transparent, pale cheeks. Song Joo-hee pressed them dry with a handkerchief and continued speaking.

“If you stay here any longer, your grades will just fall among the kids who do well. And you can’t transfer to a regular high school now. That won’t do.”

Though she didn’t state the reason specifically, Ian knew exactly why his mother said it wouldn’t do.

Shame. It would bring shame.

A single mother who returned to her homeland with baby Ian after divorce. However, Song Joo-hee had achieved notable social success worthy of showing off in her career, and it was no different at home.

Though she raised her child alone, the superficial fact that her son was also an outstanding prodigy who always ranked first in prestigious schools and swept up various awards was the pride of her strong self-esteem.

For such a son to not endure in a specialized high school and go to a regular academic high school because of grades was something Song Joo-hee’s pride couldn’t allow.

It was when violin lessons were postponed due to the teacher’s personal circumstances and Ian came home early. Song Joo-hee was absorbed in a phone call with a friend, not knowing her son had returned.

‘…Our kid’s private education costs? Don’t even mention it. If you count from when he was little, it would easily buy a house in Gyeonggi Province.’

Ian, who had come to call his mother and stopped at hearing about himself, unconsciously froze in place. Thanks to that, he ended up hearing all of her raw inner thoughts that he didn’t want to know.

‘Why go to such lengths? Do you even need to ask? It’s obviously to show that my life hasn’t been a failure. When I divorced my kid’s father and came back to Korea with just the baby, I haven’t forgotten a single thing people whispered about. Look at her, marrying that rich American guy from a wealthy family and then divorcing and coming back in less than three years. Ji-young, you remember how they talked behind my back at the reunion, right?’

The clear and confident voice of the woman who had been living boldly while raising her son alone as an Omega was trembling with indignation.

‘It’s not enough for just me to do well. Hey, when people get older, that alone isn’t enough anymore. The real victory is making your children successful too. Now I’m going to watch with my eyes wide open to see what happens to those people. Let’s really see what happens when those people’s kids take their college entrance exams. Let’s see if they can still hold their heads high at reunions then.’

Though he had vaguely sensed his mother’s excessive obsession with his education, the truth he heard from her own mouth was more stark than that.

But even though Song Joo-hee was such a prideful woman, it didn’t mean she didn’t love him as a mother. That was why Ian remained silent throughout.

His mother’s face as she came into his bedroom every night after working herself to the bone, stroking his hair while gazing at her sleeping son endlessly.

Even though she must have been tired, instead of going straight to rest, she would kiss his cheeks and forehead and stroke him for a long time, he often pretended to sleep because he liked it. So even if she was selfish and twisted, he never doubted his mother’s love.

The conclusion Ian reached after agonizing thoughts was this,

His mother… the human Song Joo-hee was simply too prideful and perfectionist to bear her child being weak or failing.

In other words, perhaps she was someone who loved her son but loved herself a bit more. That’s what Ian thought as he was pushed off to America like being shoved from behind.

“Why, why don’t you want to go?”

Song Joo-hee asked, standing blankly in the airport where everyone was moving busily with excited faces.

“No…”

What could he say to that? Ian couldn’t say anything because he knew what thoughts she was sending him away with.

Even if Ian could have logically laid out his sorrowful emotions through his learning achievements, it would have been the same. Having matured early and knowing too much about the circumstances and his mother’s heart, Ian paradoxically had nothing to say.

Looking at the silent Ian, Song Joo-hee had an expression of incomprehension.

“It might be difficult staying here like this, but if it’s you over there, you can definitely get into the Ivy League. That’s our goal, isn’t it, son? You said you’d go to Harvard like mom and dad.”

“…”

He actually questioned whether the goal that had been drilled into him since childhood was truly his own goal.

“Mom wouldn’t have sent you either if I was going to have you homestay with people you don’t even know. But that’s not the case. Your dad is living there properly.”

Perhaps worried that her son might hold out at the last minute saying he wouldn’t go, Song Joo-hee coaxed Ian, who was looking only at the floor with a gloomy face, in an unusually gentle voice.

“You’re going to dad’s house, don’t you like that? You like dad. Right?”

“Of course I like dad…”

“Right. You get to live with that dad you like, so why are you like this?”

But I have to be separated from mom. I have to leave the place I’ve lived until now, the familiar neighborhood, all my friends, and start alone in a strange place.

Ian forced himself to swallow the things he wanted to say. Because his mother’s expression was distorted sorrowfully as if she too would burst into tears.

“…Dad will treat you well. He and I separated ages ago, but he’s absolutely devoted to you.”

A man who’s absolutely devoted to you.

The word “devoted” never quite fit his blue-eyed Caucasian father who was so perfectly American, always sounding awkwardly mismatched, but it was her favorite expression. She never failed to use it whenever she talked about her divorced ex-husband in front of her son.

Ian quietly thought of his father whom he met every vacation.

Though he had given up custody rights in the divorce, Harrison Bailey, Ian’s father, was strict as a knife when it came to visitation rights, which were both his right and duty.

Even while running the large business he had inherited as a family enterprise, he somehow made time every year to spend alone with Ian, his first son. So even though he was a father who had separated when Ian was very young, Ian definitely recognized that he was ‘father’ and ‘family.’

Song Joo-hee, who keenly noticed Ian’s slightly softened expression when his father was mentioned, soothed her son with an even gentler voice.

“You’ll do well there too.”

Then she gently stroked Ian’s hair that came down pitifully to under his eyes and swept it back behind his ears.

Ian knew that his mother was artificially trying hard, bringing up this and that to comfort him because she was worried her only son might leave sadly in tears, but Ian was also young. He had no choice but to nod to her with an inevitably softened heart.

“Probably everyone you meet will like you. It’s always been that way since you were little.”

From a very young age, whenever he went to the playground, it was routine for two or three children to follow Ian around like little tails. Song Joo-hee’s face became more gentle as she recalled her son’s most lovable days.

“Do you remember how candies and jellies came out of your pockets every day even in elementary school? You’d say friends gave them to you and put them in your pockets every day without eating them, and how many times they exploded in the washing machine when I did laundry without knowing, really.”

At those words, Ian had no choice but to give up his tearful face and chuckle. Once, gum had gone through the wash cycle and he and his mother had sat down together and struggled for a long time trying to save the ruined pants before giving up.

“Even now there are kids who text you at all hours.”

“…I told you not to look at my phone.”

“I wasn’t trying to look, but when I’m at home the notifications go off constantly, how could I not know?”

Ian’s cheeks flushed bright red at his mischievous mother’s words. Because his skin was very fair, his blush showed especially severely when he was embarrassed or flustered. Even knowing this, it wasn’t something he could control himself, so it couldn’t be helped. Ian felt even his ears getting hot and shook his head in embarrassment.

“Mom knows our son is always popular.”

There was a hint of pride in that.

Before he knew it, Ian was led by Song Joo-hee’s hand to sit on a bench behind them. She endlessly stroked his hands that had grown larger than her own and persuaded him gently.

“You’ll make friends quickly there too.”

“…”

“It’s always been that way. At first they’d be intimidated thinking you were a foreigner because of your appearance, but soon everyone would like you.”

Ian was mixed Korean and Western, and he particularly resembled his father’s side more. Anyone seeing him for the first time would typically guess from his appearance alone that he was a Westerner with only black hair.

“So you won’t experience subtle racial discrimination like mom did.”

“Mom…”

“You don’t need to make that face. That was more than 20 years ago. I heard things have really improved a lot these days. So don’t worry, son.”

The hand that had been gently stroking now came around to his back and patted him soothingly.

“Do you know why we only spoke English at home even while living as Koreans in Korea, and why your mom sent you only to places that taught in English from when you were little?”

“…Because you were worried Dad and I wouldn’t be able to communicate… right?”

“No. Because I knew a day like this would come.”

An American father and Korean mother. Moreover, Ian was born in the United States and held dual citizenship. That’s why Song Joo-hee believed he needed to be able to use English as fluently as his native Korean.

Because of this, from childhood until this very moment, over 70% of the mother and son’s conversations were in English. Song Joo-hee believed that using it naturally in daily life would solidify it like a native language, and the results were excellent. Ian used English as comfortably as Korean.

“You’ve been planning to go to university in America anyway. Going a year or two earlier doesn’t change much. Mom knows this too.”

As she said this, Song Joo-hee patted Ian’s back more firmly, as if trying to give him courage.

“Live broadly, son. Let’s live broadly. Mom’s world has become narrow, but you don’t have to be that way. …Live broadly for me.”

The woman who gave birth to him and inevitably narrowed her life’s scope. A mother who had many dreams but had to return to her homeland to raise her son alone and settle in a small world. Knowing all of this, he couldn’t throw a tantrum anymore.

And so, at seventeen years old, the boy Ian boarded a plane alone.

Until this moment, he had never imagined he would meet a special connection in the sky.

It was the playful beginning of fate.

*

A teenage boy raced breathlessly across the floor covered with worn gray carpet on thin legs.

“Huff, huff…”

He had run too frantically trying not to be late for boarding time, and his heart felt like it would burst.

This was Ian’s first time at Atlanta International Airport, and his first time transferring alone. Since his father lived in Tennessee, his final destination was Nashville International Airport, but there were no direct flights from Incheon, so he had to transfer in Atlanta.

If he had known it would be like this, he should have insisted when his dad said he would make the effort to come pick him up at Atlanta International Airport. He was feeling a bit regretful as he trembled with worry about missing his flight.

However, Ian, who had grown up under Song Joo-hee’s very Korean philosophy, had developed an obsession with not causing trouble for others, and this applied to his own father as well.

“Sorry, Ian. I said I would come pick you up in Atlanta first, but something urgent came up at work. It looks like I’ll be about three hours late, can you wait?”

When his father contacted him urgently just a few days before departure, Ian calmly said it was okay.

He didn’t want to make his father, who was dealing with company problems, even busier, and he wanted to show both parents that he was really grown up now. So he hurriedly booked a separate ticket with a budget American airline and informed him.

‘Dad, don’t worry too much and take care of your business. I’ll find my way to Nashville on my own.’

Perhaps the title of being a mature, good son was Ian’s survival instinct to somehow survive in the environment he found himself in.

Having never had an open conversation with anyone, he didn’t know how other children from divorced families thought, but ever since Ian began thinking about himself, he often thought of himself as a small boat floating on the sea.

Father and mother. A drifting boat that alternated between two distant islands.

His life was always a journey of briefly docking at one parent’s island before crossing over to the opposite island again. Even though he knew the reality that he lived with his mother.

In truth, he wanted to be like a house that could plant deep pillars on solid ground on one island, on broad land.

It was a truly inexplicable anxiety. He was afraid that someday one of the two would abandon him.

He had nightmares several times about his mother telling him “Go live with your father” and casting him out, or his father stopping coming to see him one day. Even though neither of them had ever actually behaved that way.

It was like being precariously tied with old rope to a ruined dock in a corner of an island, living with the anxiety that he might break away during a typhoon and become lost in unfamiliar waters.

When his mother came home late due to work, or when she sighed looking at his report card, that anxiety only grew stronger. It was the same when his father showed him photos of the new family he had formed during their travels together, or told him how his half-siblings were doing.

He had no choice but to be a good son to be loved, to not be abandoned.

And now.

Ever since hearing that he would have to live with his father’s family in a foreign land, separated from his mother, Ian had actually been secretly practicing to stand on his own.

When he was young, he feared living a life of constant drifting without being able to put down roots anywhere, but now it was different. He would soon become an adult, and then he would live independently from his parents anyway. He pulled himself together thinking this way.

‘It would be troublesome if I’m seen as a high-maintenance son from the start.’

That’s why he had promised both of them that he could transfer alone and reach his destination, Nashville International Airport.

But no matter how fluent his English communication was, and even though this wasn’t his first long-distance trip, he couldn’t help but feel nervous. He was constantly anxious about making some mistake and missing the flight he had to catch within a short time, and sure enough, an unexpected situation arose.

‘It’s overweight.’

The small domestic airline in the US firmly refused to check Ian’s luggage as it didn’t meet their standards. He couldn’t count how many times he opened and closed his bag in front of them, taking things out to meet the weight requirement. Thanks to this, in addition to the backpack on his back, both his hands were full of luggage.

“Whew, I barely made it…”

When he finally boarded the plane, breathing heavily, he muttered to himself in deep relief. Ian, who immediately walked to find his seat, was now completely exhausted.

He hadn’t slept a wink during the over ten-hour flight from Incheon to Atlanta. Thinking about the future where he would start over in a completely new environment, sleep wouldn’t come easily. On top of that, dealing alone with the airline staff who acted coldly like a knife-wind with his tofu-like mentality had caused considerable mental exhaustion, making him even more worn out.

His tired eyelids felt stiff and gritty.

“I’m sleepy…”

If only I could sit down now, I’d have nothing more to wish for… After running around busily dragging heavy luggage across the vast airport, even his arms began to shake like someone with tremors.

He should have exercised more regularly. But with a constitution that doesn’t build muscle easily, it probably wouldn’t have made much difference. At times like this, he resented not having a more masculine, larger build and strength. Since he was still growing, maybe there’s still hope…

“17A… Here it is.”

Ian finally found his seat, checked the number, and took off the backpack he’d been carrying.

Laptop and tablet, chargers. Books to read on the plane and a couple of simple clothes, plus gifts bought at duty-free, the bag had gotten quite bulky. To get comfortable sleep for even an hour or two, it would be better to put the luggage in the overhead compartment.

With that thought, Ian opened the overhead bin only to be immediately frustrated.

“Ah, there’s no room…”

There was absolutely no space left. People who had boarded earlier had already packed their luggage tightly. It was obviously impossible to fit Ian’s large backpack in there.

What to do… The space under the seat was already full with just shopping bags, and holding it during the flight didn’t seem appealing either. Not knowing what to do, he stood there stupidly flailing about, causing people trying to get to seats further back to stop and create a traffic jam because of Ian.

“Uh, uh…”

The aisle is blocked! Everyone’s waiting because of me…! The fact that everyone was in trouble because of him. Sweat began flowing again down his back that was already wet from running, and in his panic, Ian looked back and forth between the overhead bin and his seat before finally giving up on stowing his luggage.

And just as he was about to squeeze into his seat with luggage in both hands.

“Wait.”

A low voice spoke as a large shadow fell over his head.

“Hold on.”

Had he ever heard such a reliable voice before? Ian’s gaze naturally lifted toward the person speaking to him.

And soon an exclamation mixed with surprise burst out.

“Wow…”

He had never seen such a large person before.

It was a big man with hair that was a mysterious mix of gold and dark brown. He had been sitting early in the seat next to Ian’s and now reached up to the overhead bin and began organizing inside it.

It was an amazing sight. The heavy luggage bags of others that had been stuffed in haphazardly moved around as if they were light LEGO blocks that fit in the palm of his hand.

He moved them effortlessly as if such weight was trivial, and having a talent for organizing, the inside of the overhead bin soon became neat and orderly. In less than a minute, enough space for the backpack had been created.

Ian, who had been standing there dumbfounded, just watching the man’s large muscles move lightly back and forth, finally realized that he had deliberately gotten up and moved to make room for his bag.

“Th-thank you.”

In the embarrassing situation, Ian stammered like an idiot while expressing his gratitude for the sudden kindness.

The man nodded very slightly and was about to return to his seat, but seeing Ian struggling to lift the heavy backpack with his thin arms, he couldn’t bear to sit down first and lifted it himself, placing it in the space he had created.

Ian was now at a complete loss. His face flushed with gratitude as well as embarrassment at his own patheticness.

Even as he passed through the space the man had cleared and went to his window seat on the inside, organizing the shopping bags he’d been holding under the chair, his reddened face showed no signs of cooling down.

In the midst of this, his gaze shamelessly kept going toward the man who had shown him kindness.

‘He’s handsome…’

His face was truly dazzling, like a watch model hanging on the wall of a department store luxury section. Of course, the guy comfortably wearing a hoodie looked much younger than the mature male models, but as he stole glances at his sculpture-like handsome features, no other comparison came to mind. Ah, maybe he’s similar to a jeans brand model… He’s tall, has a good body, is handsome, and even kind.

While organizing his seat, his eyes kept unconsciously wandering over there, staring blankly like an idiot, when the man’s head turned up.

Their intense eyes met exactly.

“Ah…”

He’d been caught peeking. Ian’s ears instantly turned bright red. In his embarrassment, he unconsciously turned his head away quickly, pretending he had just happened to look that way and their eyes had met by chance, then busily organized his seat again.

This time I really shouldn’t look. He’ll be annoyed. Even though he made that resolution in his heart, the moment he lifted his head, their eyes met again. This time it was because the man was looking at him.

Feeling somewhat shy and embarrassed, Ian muttered quietly like an ant crawling, “Thank you so much,” and the man also shrugged and shook his head. The sound of him quietly responding “Don’t mention it” followed.

He was curious about what expression he was making, but Ian deliberately turned his gaze to the opposite side, feeling that looking more would be doing something terrible to someone who had shown him kindness. And he hunched his body as much as possible, hoping that the large man could sit comfortably beside him.

The noise of passengers busily finding seats and moving around could be heard faintly in the distance.

Perhaps because he was trying too hard to sit still without moving, Ian fell into a deep sleep.

How much time had passed?

‘Huh…?’

Suddenly Ian’s eyes snapped open.

‘What? When did I fall asleep?’

Don’t you sometimes have moments when your brain suddenly wakes up as if someone had clapped their hands right next to your ear, even though there was no sound or contact? This was one of those times for Ian.

As if lightning had struck his head, he opened his eyes in shock. But what was more bewildering was that even though he had clearly opened his eyes, it was pitch black in front of him.

When he unconsciously moved around in confusion, something slid down over his face and his vision became a little brighter. Only then did the dim scenery inside the narrow airplane begin to come into view. Including the identity of what had been covering his eyes in darkness.

It was a blanket sold for a fee on the airplane.

Whose is this…? He didn’t know where this had come from, but the reality remained that it had been covering him from the top of his head to his knees. Ian looked around to understand his immediate situation and discovered that the man sitting next to him was keeping his body as far away as possible while frowning and covering his mouth and nose with both hands.

“Ah…!”

Only then did he understand the situation. Ian was so surprised that he hurriedly corrected his posture.

“S-sorry!”

While half-unconscious from fatigue, some pheromones had unknowingly leaked out.

It wasn’t the kind that caused sexual arousal, but releasing pheromones in public places was a kind of nuisance, like having a loud conversation in a quiet space.

He usually controlled his pheromones well to prevent leakage, but he must have been so tired that he made a mistake while sleeping. Ian blocked his pheromones once again while rummaging through his pockets to quickly spray the emergency pheromone neutralizer he carried around all over his body.

Embarrassment rose at the thought that the other person had noticed this. Looking at his particularly superior appearance, he had guessed he might be an Alpha, and it seemed he really was an Alpha. Had he been the one to cover him with this blanket too?

If so, he had been even more rude.

“S-sorry.”

“…”

“I really didn’t mean to.”

He mumbled apologies several times, but the man sitting next to him already seemed displeased and had no intention of talking to him, shaking his head briefly and leaning further to the opposite side. He seemed to be trying hard not to touch Ian, apparently finding Omega pheromones quite uncomfortable.

Ian’s shoulders and eyebrows drooped dejectedly. Somehow, it felt like nothing was going right today. Starting off like this from his first beginning in America, what should he do from now on? To think he had made someone who had shown him kindness feel uncomfortable instead.

‘Instead of repaying the favor, I only caused trouble…’

He kept worrying and glancing toward the man, and it seemed the neutralizer had worked as his deeply furrowed brow appeared to have relaxed somewhat. Though his hand still covered his nose and mouth.

The fortunate thing was that the plane was scheduled to land soon. If they had to fly for another hour or two like this, Ian might have burst into tears. Along with his apologetic feelings, he was deeply anxious that today’s bleakness might be a prophecy or preview of his future life in America.

But perhaps a merciful god helped him just a little at the last moment, as the plane quickly landed safely on the runway.

As soon as the seatbelt sign turned off, the man in the next seat stood up faster than anyone else. Then he disappeared in a flash like lightning.

“Really fast…”

He had thought such crazy reaction speed was a Korean characteristic, but apparently anyone could do it if they put their mind to it.

Worried about running into him again and being a nuisance, Ian got up almost last. And he trudged out of the plane as the very last person.

This was the first meeting between Terrence Hunt and Song Ian.

Though he thought it was just someone he would pass by, he would meet him again later, but with him it was messy from the very beginning. And this day’s events continued to remain in a corner of Ian’s heart, making him uncomfortable.

Perhaps the reason Ian had no choice but to run away had this kind of shock and stereotype laid thinly at its foundation.

I must be someone who causes trouble for Terrence Hunt.

It was a beginning that could only lead to such misunderstanding.