PSY CH 3

The dark clouds seemed to be clearing up, and unexpectedly, the weather became clear. It had been several days since he last saw such a clear sky.

The sun, which had been hiding well during the rain, seemed to be trying to make up for its lost light, as it blazed down intensely. The heated asphalt sizzled. 

Jooyoung wiped the sweat running down his nape with his palm and quickened his pace. The ice cream he had been crunching earlier had melted into what felt like lukewarm cream. 

He regretted going out, but walking outside for a while was better than staying still in the pawnshop, which was less than 33 m² in size. The fresh air that didn’t feel stuffy was also very welcome.

“Is that Young-i?

As Jooyoung reached the building, someone called out to him. He turned his eyes, which had been squinting from the sunlight, to the right.

[Waves Adult Arcade]

Under a sign painted with colorful corals and fish, a group of men was standing together, smoking. They appeared to be in their 50s, and one of them, seeing Jooyoung, greeted him.

“Wow, it really is you.”

This was someone Jooyoung didn’t recognize.

“Your grandpa talked about you a lot.” 

An older man with graying hair pointed at Jooyoung with the hand holding his cigarette. 

There were many people who recognized Jooyoung here. Some, like Aunt Sooeun, were people Jooyoung knew, while there were others who knew Jooyoung but whom Jooyoung didn’t recognize. Most of them said they had heard about Jooyoung from his grandpa.

Jooyoung lowered the ice cream. He didn’t know who the man was, but since he was in front of elders, he decided to be polite.

“Who’s that?”

At the group’s question, the man scratched his forehead and answered.

“Y’know who I mean. That one grandson he raised up from nothin’, changin’ dirty diapers and all.” 

The men gave off the smell of stale cigarettes. Every time they spoke, their yellowing teeth would occasionally show. 

“That old man said he looked like a baby’s butt, and y’know what? His grandpa wasn’t wrong.”

The man grinned and complimented Jooyoung, saying, “So good-looking.” He then flicked off the ashes and asked Jooyoung.

“How old are you?”

“Ah, I’m twenty-five.”

The man, mentioning that he had a child of the same age, looked at Jooyoung with curious eyes. Jooyoung stood still, raising his hand to shield his face from the sun.

“You came from Seoul, right? Look at you, <em>poshirapne</em>~^[1]”

“Pardon?”

When Jooyoung asked in confusion, the man chuckled and said, “Well, it’s just something people say.” Then, the conversation smoothly shifted to Jooyoung’s grandpa.

“How’s his health?”

“Just like before… he’s still receiving treatment.”

“Diabetes is scary, ya know? Once you start takin’ meds, that’s it—you’re done for.”

The man lit his cigarette, launching into a long lecture about diabetes. Jooyoung listened half-heartedly, trying to find a way to excuse himself, and fortunately, the opportunity came quickly. 

As the door to the adult arcade opened, someone appeared.

“A seat’s free.”

All the men’s gazes turned toward the sound in unison. The one who casually pointed inside with his chin was Hwang Dohyun. He leaned back against the open door, tapping the cigarette pack against his palm. Soon, a white cigarette poked out from the pack.

“Dohyun, can’t you save that seat for me? If not, my hand just won’t feel right.”

“Stop talking nonsense about ‘hand feeling right.’”

Despite the rebuke from the others, the middle-aged man grinned.

“Young-ah, let’s meet often.”

He waved lazily as he walked into the arcade. Jooyoung also replied politely, “Alright, please, go ahead.”

As the middle-aged men rushed in, Dohyun, who had been holding the door, turned and looked at Jooyoung. 

His eyes were slightly squinted, his lips pressed tightly together, and his cheeks a bit stiff. It was the same face Jooyoung had seen over the past few days. 

“Hi.”

Dohyun’s eyes widened in surprise. He seemed startled that Jooyoung had greeted him first. His expression, once unreadable, now looked like it belonged to someone his age. 

“It’s really been a long time.”

Jooyoung smiled as he approached him. As he got closer to the arcade, the sign hung overhead, and the sunlight quickly disappeared. Jooyoung lowered his hand, which had been shielding his forehead.

“How have you been?”

“…”

“I came here last week.”

Jooyoung tapped his thigh absentmindedly with the hand holding the ice cream. Each time, the bag dangling from his wrist made a rustling sound.

Dohyun stayed silent, his lips pressed tightly together. A natural silence settled between them, but Jooyoung didn’t mind. Looking at Dohyun’s stiff expression, he spoke playfully.

“Are you not happy to see me?”

He didn’t even consider the thought that Dohyun might not remember him, nor did he think Dohyun might not be happy to see him.

It had always been Dohyun chasing after him, and Jooyoung had always been the one to welcome him. That’s why Jooyoung could casually greet him as if nothing had changed.

“I’m happy to see you.” 

Dohyun’s brows twitched.

“…You’re happy to see me?”

Finally, his tightly pressed lips parted. Dohyun’s voice sounded much different from Jooyoung’s childhood memories. It was lower, with a resonance as if he spoke from the depths of a cave. 

“Yeah. It’s been almost ten years for us, hasn’t it?”

At that moment, Dohyun let out a brief, sardonic laugh. He glared at the air in front of him, and then in a blunt tone, he spoke.

“You didn’t even recognize me.”

“Oh, that’s… well, you’ve changed so much.” 

Jooyoung wrinkled his nose and laughed awkwardly. No matter how much Dohyun had changed, it was true that he hadn’t recognized him, so Jooyoung understood if the greeting didn’t feel genuine from Dohyun’s perspective.

“You didn’t recognize me either.”

“I did recognize you.”

“Then why did you ask whether I was a twigi?”

Dohyun didn’t seem able to answer right away, as if he’d been asked a difficult question. Watching his lips twitch and press shut again, Jooyoung took a bite of his ice cream, the sticky sweetness lingering on his tongue.

“Did you live here the whole time?”

“…”

“Or did you leave and come back?”

A 1-ton truck rumbled loudly as it sped over a speed bump in the distance. Soon, cars caught at the signal began to stop one by one on the road.

Dohyun lowered his head, gazing at the familiar yet dull scene. He absentmindedly twirled the cigarette he hadn’t planned to light. 

“Grandpa mentioned you—”

“But…”

Dohyun lifted his eyes from the ground. His gaze, as crooked as his posture, exuded a defiant air. 

“Why are you so happy to see me?”

Perhaps it was an unexpected question; Jooyoung hesitated for a moment.

“Well… it’s just because it’s been a while.”

At Jooyoung’s quiet response, Dohyun scratched his eyebrow with the hand holding the cigarette, then chuckled.

“There’s a fucking lot to be happy about, huh.”

Jooyoung’s brow furrowed slightly. Dohyun’s clear lack of enthusiasm was evident.

“…”

Jooyoung had honestly thought Dohyun would be happy to see him. It may have been a long time ago, back in elementary school, but they had been close, always together, and even called “the pair” in the neighborhood. More than that, Dohyun would have jumped out of bed if it were Jooyoung. He never imagined Dohyun would respond so sharply. So, Jooyoung couldn’t help but ask.

“Why aren’t you happy to see me?”

Dohyun stiffened for a moment, but then he burst out laughing, almost as if in disbelief. The laughter didn’t stop after just one chuckle—it continued for quite a while.

“Why am I not happy to see you?”

Neither the laughter nor the sharp response made any sense to Jooyoung.

“Wow…”

“…”

“I didn’t know someone could stay exactly the same like this.”

Dohyun rubbed the back of his neck, staring off into the distance. When he looked back at Jooyoung, not a trace of a smile remained on his face. The sharp glint in his eyes beneath his straight brows was nothing short of ice-cold.

“I have no idea what’s so fucking great about seeing you.”

“…”

“So don’t go around pretending we’re close.”

He bent the unlit cigarette in half and flicked it away.

“I truly mean this.” 

His fierce expression made it clear: it was a warning. Then, as if to drive the point home, he slammed the door shut behind him. Ding-a-ling. The bell hanging on the door jingled with a clear, cheerful sound that didn’t match the mood at all.

“…”

Jooyoung stood there, blankly staring at the sky-blue film covering the glass door. He had greeted Dohyun so warmly, only to be met with an unexpected warning. He couldn’t quite wrap his head around what had just happened.

Everyone Jooyoung had met in Maeyang in the past few weeks had been kind. Some looked at him with affection; others seemed almost regretful that they couldn’t offer him something. Among them was even the middle-aged man Jooyoung had once called “octopus” as a kid for his bald head. These people remembered Jooyoung fondly, and he had benefited from that nostalgia.

But the one person Jooyoung had been closest to—Dohyun—had responded with nothing but hostility. 

It felt less like a reunion between old friends and more like running into a sworn enemy. 

“…”

Drip. Drip. The ice cream, now completely melted, dripped at Jooyoung’s feet. The sunlight beat down harshly on the spots.

Jooyoung remained there for a while, unable to walk away.