TG Ch 3(1) Part 8

However, the scolding didn’t bother him as much as it should have. He actually found himself grinning as he looked at Jeong Taeyul’s handsome face. 

Jeong Taeyul, without looking up, asked, “What are you smiling about?”

“It’s just… surprising, is all.”

“What is?”

“Do you usually take care of people like this?”

Jeong Taeyul’s expression hardened at the gentle question, as if he had just been insulted. 

“…No, never mind.”

He mumbled, pulling out a fresh gauze pad. Sijin wondered if he’d said something wrong. 

Silence descended upon the room. The only sound was Jeong Taeyul rummaging through the first-aid kit. Many of the items were missing, and each time Jeong Taeyul tossed an empty box aside, he let out a sigh that seemed directed at Ham Geonwu. He hadn’t uttered a single insult, but Sijin could practically hear them in his head.

Sijin watched him, a thoughtful expression on his face. Even the prickly Jeong Taeyul knew how to take care of people when it mattered. Was that how he’d become a Captain? For the first time, the thought crossed Sijin’s mind that maybe Jeong Taeyul wasn’t that scary after all. He was just being extra prickly towards Sijin because of Ham Geonwu. 

‘He’s still… affected by his past as a test subject…’

Ham Geonwu’s words echoed in Sijin’s mind, filling him with a sense of melancholy. Jeong Taeyul’s inability to open up was most likely rooted in a past filled with pain. Sijin had assumed that his prickly demeanor stemmed solely from jealousy and rivalry, but now he felt guilty for judging him so harshly. 

After a moment of hesitation, Sijin decided to be the one to open up first. He confessed the truth he’d been trying to hide.

“Guide Jeong Taeyul.”

“Yes.”

“I… I have claustrophobia. I was just startled, that’s all.”

“…Claustrophobia?”

Sijin nodded sheepishly. It was a common phobia, so he didn’t expect Jeong Taeyul to overreact. In Sijin’s case, it had been exacerbated by the accident, but there was no need to go into detail. 

Jeong Taeyul bit his lip, as if remorseful. Sijin felt the urge to reassure him, to pat him on the head and tell him it was okay.

Then, Jeong Taeyul spoke, his voice softer than before, “…Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I… didn’t have the chance.”

Sijin chuckled, trying to lighten the mood. However, when he looked down, he saw that Jeong Taeyul was still staring intently at his wound, his expression unreadable, as if lost in thought. 

“Jeong Taeyul?”

As Sijin was about to ask him about it, Jeong Taeyul spoke up while tending to his wounds.

“Since when were you claustrophobic?”

“That’s…”

Sijin paused, searching his hazy memory. Claustrophobia. It was a long-forgotten memory for Sijin. A memory of unimaginable darkness, of being trapped in a coffin-like space, weeping uncontrollably, losing all track of time. 

Just the thought of it made him feel breathless. Sijin forced himself to take a deep breath and mumbled, his gaze fixed somewhere below, “It’s a painful memory. I don’t want to think about it. Anyway… it’s all in the past now.” 

Sijin spoke as if it were nothing, but a bitter smile played on his lips. 

Jeong Taeyul remained silent for a while. His hand, with its prominent knuckles, was gripping Sijin’s pale ankle. Sijin wondered if he shouldn’t have brought up such a heavy topic. 

After a moment of silence, Jeong Taeyul spoke again as he applied more antiseptic, “Isn’t it hard having trauma?”

“Um… no, I’m fine, really.”

“You’re fine?”

Jeong Taeyul scoffed at his answer. Sijin narrowed his eyes, about to retort, asking why he even bothered to ask if he was just going to ridicule him.

But the next words out of Jeong Taeyul’s mouth left him speechless. 

“You take deep breaths before entering the underground training ground. Even the slightest whooshing sound makes you jump.”

“…..”

“You don’t take the elevator alone. You can’t even close the bathroom door properly when you shower. And you say you’re fine?”

“That’s…” 

Sijin stared back at him, unable to hide his astonishment. 

When did Jeong Taeyul see and remember all of that? Those were all things Sijin did his best to conceal, believing no one would ever notice. 

Jeong Taeyul’s voice was cold as he said, “Don’t say you’re fine when you’re not.”

“…Am I not even allowed to say I’m fine?” 

Sijin retorted quietly. 

If he couldn’t say he was fine, what else could he say? 

Sijin had never once thought about what to say other than ‘I’m fine.’  To be honest, he never even had the chance. The incident was in the past, and he couldn’t afford to be shackled by it any longer. There were always more pressing matters in the present that demanded his attention; so much so that he barely had time to tend to his own needs.

It was then that Jeong Taeyul spoke, his brow furrowed, “You’re under my protection. I need to know what makes you tick, what scares you, what situations bring you a sense of security. I can’t protect you properly unless I understand these things.”

“…..”

Sijin stared at Jeong Taeyul, his eyes wide with surprise. He had thought this before, but Jeong Taeyul was truly dedicated to his missions. Despite his disapproval of Sijin, he still prioritized his protection above all else. 

Jeong Taeyul was even trying to take responsibility for his peace of mind.

Sijin was beginning to feel a sense of trust towards this meticulous man.

“I’m… a little better when I’m with someone else,” Sijin confessed hesitantly. Always used to being the caregiver, it felt awkward to talk about himself. But this, he felt, he could share.  

“If I’m not alone, I can manage to take the elevator. The basement is a bit suffocating, but I can handle it if there are other people around.”

Jeong Taeyul stopped what he was doing and listened intently to Sijin’s explanation, his gaze fixed on Sijin’s pale foot. Sijin continued, speaking frankly, “I’ve been getting treatment consistently. I was just startled earlier because the door closed so suddenly.”

“…..”

Jeong Taeyul sat motionless for a moment before nodding curtly.

“I understand.”

With that brief response, Jeong Taeyul returned his focus to the wound. He began to cut a clean piece of gauze to cover it.

Across from him, Sijin’s expression softened.

It was strange. He had just opened up to Jeong Taeyul about his old trauma, yet he felt a sense of peace. It had been a long time since he had truly talked about himself like this. Sharing his vulnerability made him feel closer to Jeong Taeyul somehow. 

It also gave him the courage to ask Jeong Taeyul something he was curious about. “Why did you leave the bar early? You said you had something to tell me?”

“…..”

Jeong Taeyul didn’t respond, his eyes still fixed on Sijin’s wound. He carefully placed the gauze over the cut, but it was already stained crimson with fresh blood.

“Guide Jeong Taeyul?” 

Sijin called out again, and Jeong Taeyul, as if awakened from a trance, carefully applied a bandage over the gauze. His touch was surprisingly gentle and meticulous, like he was handling something precious.  

“There. Be careful with your wound.”

“Why? What was it about?”

Jeong Taeyul continued bandaging as if he hadn’t heard Sijin’s question. The wound on Sijin’s foot was now completely covered, as if it had never been there.  

Finally, as he packed up the first-aid kit, Jeong Taeyul gave a sly smile.  “Oh, it’s nothing.  Just that Ham Geonwu has a thing for tall, sexy girls with curves.” 

Sijin instinctively looked down at his own chest. He saw a pale, slender frame. His chest was a little firm, but honestly, quite flat. Height, sexiness, curves. He struck out on all three.

Then his eyes drifted to Jeong Taeyul’s impressive physique. Compared to his muscular build, honed from years of real-life combat, Sijin’s body looked downright pathetic. He frowned, a wave of insecurity washing over him. Was Jeong Taeyul implying that he ticked all the boxes? 

“What, were you actually hoping…?”

Jeong Taeyul, who had been about to stand up, stopped mid-sentence, his hand frozen in place. 

“….?”

Sijin stared back at him, puzzled. Jeong Taeyul’s gaze was fixed on Sijin’s face, his sharp eyes unusually intense, almost possessive. Sijin felt like he was being scrutinized, as if he had done something wrong. He shifted uncomfortably under his gaze.

Then, Jeong Taeyul pulled his knees closer to his chest. He was so tall that even that simple movement brought their faces closer. 

“…..” 

“…Jeong Taeyul?”

Sijin leaned back, his heart pounding. As he did, the faint outline of his abdominal muscles became visible through his damp shirt. 

Jeong Taeyul was too close. Sijin, unable to meet his gaze, looked down, his eyes falling on the defined lines of Jeong Taeyul’s neck. Like Ham Geonwu, he was also wearing a platinum necklace. Sijin’s eyes drifted lower, taking in Jeong Taeyul’s broad chest. His pecs, marked with faint scars, rose and fell with each breath. 

Sijin squirmed under his intense stare, placing a hand on Jeong Taeyul’s shoulder, as if to create some distance between them. Why did Jeong Taeyul insist on staring at Sijin’s face as if his life depended on it? 

Whoosh.

Suddenly, Jeong Taeyul pulled the blanket up, covering Sijin’s legs. 

“You’re showing off your pale thighs.” 

“Ah…”

Sijin’s cheeks flushed. He was practically naked under that robe, and he could only imagine what Jeong Taeyul had seen from his position on the floor.

Jeong Taeyul stood up, running a hand through his hair in frustration. “Just get dressed. You’re annoying me.” 

“We’re both men. What’s the big deal?”

“So, you’re saying you want to walk around naked?”

“I’ll get dressed…”

Sijin’s attempt at a retort only seemed to make things worse. He hesitantly pulled the blanket down, reaching for his clothes. Jeong Taeyul was being a hypocrite; he was the one who was shirtless. 

“Wait.”

“Huh?”

Jeong Taeyul yanked the blanket back up, covering Sijin up to his chest.

At that moment, the sound of the electronic door lock disengaging echoed through the room.

“…What the…?”

The person who opened the door was the rightful owner of the room.

Ham Geonwu stood in the doorway, frowning, looking at his own room as if it were the strangest thing he’d ever seen.

To be continued in Volume 2.