EAR Ch 22

When they went on a field trip to the amusement park, some children wore short-sleeved shirts, and others wore long-sleeved shirts. About a month later, after the field trip, it was now full-blown summer.

June, the month when the sun shines on the world the longest, was ushered in by a bright blue sky and strong sunlight. The boys sweated profusely from the moment they left for school in the morning. Not a few students rushed to the school store as soon as they arrived, biting into ice cream or gulping down cold drinks. Even just a short run on the playground during lunch break was enough to gradually tan their pale winter skin day by day.

It was such a refreshing season, but the situation for the second-year high school students was a little different.

The first-year students of Ilyang Boys’ High School had their school trip, and the third-year students had the long-awaited college entrance exams, but for the second-year students, these were someone else’s stories. The only school event they could enjoy in the first semester of their second year was the field trip. There was a school festival in the second semester, but unless you were actively involved in club activities or had a special talent in arts or athletics, it was difficult to fully enjoy the festival as a main participant.

The only major event left in the first semester of the second year, after the spring field trip had ended, was the final exams, which were far removed from dreams and hopes. The boys had no choice but to endure their tedious days, eagerly awaiting summer vacation. Supplementary lessons would start soon enough, but still, vacation was vacation.

“I heard the water park opened. I want to go.”

“I’ll definitely go during vacation.”

The topics of conversation in the classroom also changed with the seasons. Some students were already excitedly making plans for their vacation, which was still a long way off. The likelihood of second-year high school students dedicating their summer vacation solely to playing was extremely low, so most of these plans would end up as pipe dreams, but there was no way to stop them from dreaming.

“Seungpyo, what are you going to do during vacation?”

“I don’t know yet. My family has a beach we often go to in the summer, so I think we’ll go there again this year. Or maybe my grandmother’s house.”

For Oh Seungpyo, who was handsome, tall, good at studying, and good at sports—and thus whose life was generally easy and enjoyable—the latter half of the first semester, with only the final exams remaining, was also a boring time. It was heartbreaking to spend more than half the day trapped in school while the world was becoming lush, green, and sparkling.

Moreover, his own flesh and blood, living in the same house, had already finished his classes and was busy going out and having fun every day. Seeing him leisurely getting ready to go out and play as Seungpyo left for school in his uniform often made him want to kick his brother’s ass, regardless of their familial relationship.

“Seungyeon already finished his semester. It pisses me off seeing him getting ready to go out and play when I have to go to school.”

“Your brother graduated high school and went to college. I heard he was a good student too.”

“I know, but it still pisses me off.”

“Let’s go to the water park together later. College girls might talk to you if you’re with me. It happened when you went to the ski resort in the winter, right?”

“What’s the point of them talking to me? I’m not going to date them.”

“Still, it feels good.”

Even if they made plans to hang out during vacation now, less than half of them would actually be able to follow through. It would be nice if they could go, but who knew what would happen. Seungpyo chuckled and replied nonchalantly, “Sure, whatever.”

It was still over a month away, but the excitement the word “vacation” brought had been consistent since elementary school. Seungpyo glanced sideways at the boy sitting over there. He was curious about what kind of vacation Ryu Jaemin would have.

“I don’t think I can go anywhere this summer. My mom wants me to go to a boarding school.”

“Boarding school? I heard it’s not much fun in the summer. It’s better to go in the winter.”

“Ah, whatever. I messed up the midterms, so she won’t listen to me.”

When the topic of the water park came up, the boys who knew they wouldn’t be able to join in the fun grumbled and lamented their fate.

Seungpyo guessed that Ryu Jaemin’s vacation would probably be similar. Even if it wasn’t boarding school, plans for fun, like water parks or beaches, probably didn’t exist in the first place.

While the other boys were chatting, Seungpyo quietly took out his phone and logged into social media. He went to their private message box and sent a short message.

Wanna do it?

Jaemin, who was diligently looking at a book, notebook, or workbook, fumbled for his phone and checked it. A reply arrived shortly after.

Yeah.

Seungpyo quietly got up and went out into the hallway, leaving behind the boys who were deep in conversation. A few seconds later, Jaemin also slipped out of the classroom.

The relationship that had begun in early spring, when the lingering cold hadn’t yet disappeared, continued into the summer before the final exams. In the meantime, the two had become masters of sneaking kisses at school.

The two boys, who amicably shared the top two ranks in the school, didn’t let their accumulated experience go to waste. They had reliable data on the safest places to do their thing, depending on the time and situation, so they headed straight to their predetermined destination without hesitation.

To utilize the 10-minute break time, places too far from the classroom were inconvenient. But places where other students easily went in and out were also risky. From the beginning, the library or unused club rooms were perfect for break time.

Today, a club room was empty. The two quickly went inside and locked the door. Without a word, they pressed their lips together and intertwined their tongues.

From the moment their skin touched, goosebumps rose on the back of their necks, and a pleasant tingling sensation washed over them. At some point, it had become a habit to hug each other tightly when they kissed, as if wanting to feel each other more within the short time they had.

Now that they were wearing summer uniforms, the only thing covering their bodies was a thin shirt. Compared to the winter when they wore thick outerwear like jackets, vests, jumpers, or sweatshirts, the outlines of their bodies were felt more clearly just by touching.

Long, firm arms, extending from the loose, white sleeves, wrapped around each other’s waists and necks. Their shirt colors were the same, but their skin tones were slightly different. Seungpyo’s arms, tanned from enjoying playing ball and throwing on the playground even during the summer, were noticeably darker than they had been last winter.

Whenever their bodies touched, the night they spent together at Ryu Jaemin’s house during the field trip automatically came to Seungpyo’s mind. The night they had stripped naked and rubbed their damp, bare bodies together, panting. They had rolled around in bed after showering without drying themselves. Their bodies had gotten so hot that by the time they got out of bed, their bodies and hair were almost dry.

“Haah…”

Jaemin lifted his head, exhaling a ragged breath. Seungpyo also let out a low exhale, “Hoo.”

Break time was too short to slowly savor past memories while busy concentrating on kissing. It didn’t feel like they had been kissing for that long, but there was only about a minute left until class.

The hallway outside the club room was noisy with the sounds of students returning to their classrooms. They had to hurry, but the two stubbornly avoided each other’s gaze and pretended to be preoccupied.

Lately, they had been inexplicably sullen after they finished kissing. Before, even if they were angry, upset, or gloomy, a kiss would lighten their hearts and they would joke or play around with each other, but now it was the opposite.

While kissing, they felt good, but after it was over, they were dissatisfied and inexplicably sulky. Today was no different. Seungpyo and Jaemin left the club room with sullen faces.

“What are you doing during vacation?”

There was no one’s fault or any particular reason for feeling this way. It wasn’t as enjoyable as before, but it wasn’t so unpleasant that they wanted to stop kissing.

That’s why, lately, neither of them had said aloud that kissing didn’t feel the same anymore.

Seungpyo, asking about vacation plans, seemed to be throwing out any words to alleviate the awkward silence. Jaemin also replied curtly.

“Study, I guess.”

“Aren’t you going anywhere?”

“Probably not this year. If I do, it’ll be for a study trip.”

Seungpyo nodded indifferently at the expected answer. As they exchanged a few meaningless words, they arrived at the classroom. The teacher, about to start class, saw the two model students who had just arrived and chided them.

“You should come early before the bell rings. Hurry up and get inside.”

“Yes, sir!”

The two quickly entered the classroom and dispersed.

Seungpyo slumped into his seat with a sigh. He silently bit his lip, the same one that had been pressed against Ryu Jaemin’s just a few minutes ago. He could still feel the lingering warmth of Ryu Jaemin’s skin, the aftertaste of their kiss, seeping into his body.

‘The kissing is still good, though.’

Seungpyo pouted his lips, which he had kept tightly closed. He didn’t understand why he felt this way. They’d sucked each other’s nipples, jerked each other off, and done almost everything they’d wanted to do. He thought their relationship had gotten better than before.

Usually, after spending a night at a friend’s house, they became much closer. He thought it would be the same with Ryu Jaemin, but why wasn’t it? Was it because he and Ryu Jaemin weren’t friends?

Since that day, they had become increasingly sullen and indifferent for no particular reason. It wasn’t just Jaemin; Seungpyo felt the same way, so he couldn’t blame him.

This was a new experience for Seungpyo in his relationships. But when he reflected on his current state, based on the various knowledge and indirect experiences he’d picked up in his eighteen years of life, there weren’t no possible reasons that came to mind.

‘…Is it boredom?’

He had never been in a relationship before, but he had heard a lot about the “boredom phase.” The time when you get tired of someone and the relationship becomes tedious, which supposedly happens when you’ve been dating someone for too long.

Of course, Oh Seungpyo and Ryu Jaemin weren’t dating. There were various reasons why they occasionally touched lips: raging hormones, the curiosity of sexual confusion during adolescence, relieving the stress of entrance exams, and so on.

However, among the numerous reasons, one thing was not included: feelings of affection for each other. Therefore, this relationship was very far from romantic love, but…

Anyway, it was true that they had been imitating what couples do for quite some time with only one person. Since they were imitating what couples do, it wasn’t unnatural to experience something similar to what couples experience. They were having a true experiential learning experience.

He wanted to ask someone who had been through it to confirm whether this feeling was really boredom. But who? He thought about it, but no one specific came to mind. If he asked his brother, he would pry and ask if he had a girlfriend, and if he asked his peers, they wouldn’t have a clue.

They had sucked nipples, touched dicks, and done almost everything they wanted to do except for sex, so maybe he’d lost interest in doing sexual things with Ryu Jaemin. Although, he still wanted to rub lips with Ryu Jaemin whenever he had the chance… Maybe it was just a habit.

If that was the case, was the period of adolescent sexual confusion that the online counselor had talked about coming to an end?

If it was time to end the kissing games with another boy, return to life before he started rubbing lips with Ryu Jaemin, study hard, exercise, occasionally play games with friends, and then, after entering college, meet a destined girlfriend who set his heart ablaze and enjoy a sweet campus life…

‘If I say let’s stop, Jaemin will probably agree.’

Lately, Jaemin had also been indifferent when they kissed. His mood, expression, and tone of voice were all similar to Seungpyo’s. He might even be relieved if Seungpyo suggested they stop.

It was a bit bittersweet, but it was a relief. They had been rubbing lips and touching each other’s dicks almost every day for months, but in the end, neither Oh Seungpyo nor Ryu Jaemin were gay.

📚

A second-year high school student’s daily schedule is always packed. Seungpyo, who returned home almost at 10 p.m., collapsed on his bed before even changing his clothes.

Once he became curious about something, his mind was preoccupied with it, and he’d barely paid attention in class all day. Seungpyo was the type to study primarily through self-study rather than classes, but he still didn’t want his mind to be constantly occupied by this.

Since there was no one suitable to ask, he had no choice but to turn to the internet once again. Seungpyo visited the online counseling center’s advice corner after a long time.

Last time, he hadn’t thought much about it, but this time, he felt strangely nervous. Hmm, he took a deep breath and typed the first letter.

Is this what boredom is?

📚

Hello. I’m a male high school student. A few months ago, I started something like a relationship with a friend from school, although we’re not actually dating.

We both plan to date later when we go to college, and we don’t intend to really date each other. We started this because we get stressed from studying and we also get lonely, so it’s to help each other and cheer each other up.

But lately, even if I do the same things with him, it’s not as fun as it used to be. Until recently, I felt relieved and happy after hanging out with him, but these days, for some reason, I feel more depressed and a bit melancholic afterward. Strangely, I feel more distant from him too. He doesn’t say anything, but I think he feels the same way.

I’ve heard that even in relationships, people get bored and go through a phase of boredom if they’ve been with someone for a long time. Are my friend and I going through the same thing? Is it time to stop this pretend relationship game and focus on studying? Honestly, I haven’t been in a real relationship yet, so I don’t know if this is actually boredom. I’m writing here because I think I might get an answer.

He didn’t want to reveal that the “play” with his school friend was kissing, or that they had stripped naked and rolled around in bed together. Because of that, his story was a bit vague, but it was enough for the counselor to give him an answer.

He wondered if he’d get a reply as quickly as last time. Continuously checking the counseling site wouldn’t solve anything. Seungpyo tried searching for similar cases using various keywords.

Then, he found a post on an anonymous site. It was a brand-new post, uploaded just recently. It seemed like an anonymous site similar to the one he’d visited before, where people easily shared secret stories that were difficult to talk about elsewhere.

My FWB dumped me today

It wasn’t meant to be FWB at first, but we went from something like dating to FWB.

We both live alone, so we went back and forth to each other’s places on weekends, sometimes went to motels, and even went to a pension for a night last summer, but he suddenly says he went on a blind date and now has a boyfriend.

He said they’ve been dating for a week. He told me to be happy with my boyfriend and ended it coolly, but fuck, even though we weren’t dating, I feel really empty.

I was okay with FWB, but I should’ve asked him out first.

Seungpyo gulped.

He knew it was a completely different story from his situation, but for some reason, he felt a pang of anxiety. He adjusted his posture and carefully examined the post.

‘FWB… probably means Friends With Benefits, right?’

He and Jaemin hadn’t had sex and had no plans to, so if he had to label it, it would be more accurate to call them Kissing Partners.

They’d never gone to each other’s places every weekend. He had only been to Jaemin’s house once, about a month ago, after deceiving his parents. They couldn’t go to a motel anyway, and once summer vacation started, they would only see each other at the academy before supplementary lessons started, so they would have even less time together than now.

Besides, Jaemin had no plans to get a girlfriend before college, and he hadn’t told Seungpyo that he wanted to stop being Kissing Partners. Rather, it was Seungpyo who was agonizing over whether they should stop.

So there was absolutely no overlap with the writer’s situation…

└ Don’t regret it. If it was good, you would’ve already been dating. You both were just at that level. Move on.

└ I’m envious. How do you find an FWB?

└ It feels like something you were holding was taken away, so it’s a shame, but you’ll forget it soon enough.

└ Stop acting cool and should’ve grabbed him today. You could’ve won since they’ve only been dating for a week.

Several replies had already appeared, following the original post. It felt like he was looking at a multiple-choice question where he had to choose the correct answer among four options. Was the person who wrote this also agonizing over the answer like Seungpyo?

It was completely different, there was really nothing in common with his situation, so why did he keep seeing the problem from the perspective of the person who wrote this post?

Seungpyo’s heart kept leaning towards the fourth comment. There was a rational reason for that. They met every weekend and even went on a trip together last summer. If he asked to officially date now, wouldn’t the person who had only been dating someone else for a week dump them and come back?

The writer seemed to be drawn to the fourth reply as well, just like Seungpyo. The writer had only replied to that comment.

└ You think so? Should I call him now?

A new reply was added immediately to the added question.

└ You should’ve said something right away. It’s too late now. Just keep it as a memory.

It was a sharp reply. Seungpyo felt as if his anticipation had been cut short along with the writer’s excitement, and he exited the post.

Like a wanderer searching for a place to go, Seungpyo endlessly scrolled up and down the bulletin board where countless posts were piled up. He felt uneasy and unfamiliar with the feeling of being hit in the bullseye, but not being able to grasp the shape of that “bullseye.”

Oh Seungpyo, the honor student, had always been praised for his quick understanding. It suddenly felt like he had become a poor student, unable to grasp the core of the problem and only wandering around it.

Ah, so this is how students who are bad at studying feel? Seungpyo suddenly gained enlightenment, became humble, and sighed.

After a moment’s hesitation, he pressed the “Write Post” button on the bulletin board. When a problem couldn’t be solved, the only option was to ask someone who knew better.

I have a partner at work,

He decided to lie and pretend to be a working adult, as he thought he would be lectured or ignored if he honestly said he was a high school student.

Somehow, I became partners with a colleague from the same company. We’re not FWB, just at the kissing stage.

We both get stressed from work, so we started this to relieve stress, but lately, after kissing, I feel bad and even more frustrated. I feel even more stressed than before.

Is this boredom? Can you get bored even when you’re not dating?

Perhaps because the title stood out, as it was posted right after the post about the FWB concerns, replies were posted like lightning.

└ You found an FWB at work?

└ Read the post properly. It says they’re not FWB.

└ FWB or not, you’re really screwed if you mess with the wrong person at work… I recommend cutting it off quickly before things go further.

└ Kissing a colleague because you’re stressed lol. Both you and that person are crazy.

└ I thought it would be a twist post, but it’s not.

└ Why is everyone so good at finding FWBs? I’m so jealous.

That wasn’t what he was curious about, but people got hung up on the phrase “same company” and started arguing about how you shouldn’t casually date people at work.

He should have pretended to be a college student and said they met at the same academy. Since he couldn’t edit the post now, Seungpyo groaned, feeling like he had wasted his time.

But after the flurry of talk about the company subsided, the atmosphere gradually calmed down, and people started talking about what Seungpyo wanted to hear.

└ Get lost, advice-givers. Whether they get screwed or not, it’s their business.

└ You haven’t had sex yet?

Finally, the focus returned to his question, and Seungpyo quickly replied.

└ Not yet. We’ve jerked each other off, and we’ve touched each other naked, but we haven’t had sex. We don’t plan to either. We both agreed to just play around until we get real girlfriends.

Then again, multiple replies poured in.

└ What? lol

└ What do you mean, not really? You’re already FWBs lol

└ You’ve done everything else and you’re pretending? Crazy.

└ It’s not boredom, it’s because you haven’t had sex yet lol.

It’s because they haven’t had sex yet?

An unexpected answer popped up as if it was obvious. While Seungpyo was too flustered to even reply, the anonymous comments naturally shifted to teasing him.

└ It’s not boredom, it’s sexual frustration lol

└ Sexual frustration confirmed lol Just fuck and it’ll be solved.

└ Ask your FWB too. He might be feeling real boredom because you’re not doing it. You, who’s pretending to be generous and not having sex, might lose him to a real man who’ll give it to him.

└ He’s already slept with another guy, not you lol. If he’s letting a coworker kiss and touch him, he’s totally a slut and 100% has another guy. I’d bet my chicken leg on it that it’s not just one guy either.

└ That coworker is only kissing you, while he’s fucking and showering with another guy.

“These fucking perverts, who do they think they’re talking about?”

Oh Seungpyo was good at both physical and verbal fights. It was his specialty to calmly provoke others into self-destruction, even when he was cursed at or picked on by strangers while playing games. This, along with his good control, was one of the reasons why other kids enjoyed playing games with him.

But today, he was being unilaterally mocked by nameless gutter trash. He didn’t even want to bother responding. Seungpyo, his face flushed red, quickly deleted the post without a second thought.

‘I should never post my concerns on these sites again.’

If he had been the only one subjected to the nonsense, he would have just considered it bad luck and forgotten about it quickly, but he felt uneasy and guilty for throwing Ryu Jaemin to the wolves, so to speak, albeit unintentionally. It was a good thing he deleted the post quickly. If he had left it up, it was obvious that even worse things would have been said about Ryu Jaemin.

Of course, the perverts behind the screen didn’t know who Oh Seungpyo and Ryu Jaemin were and were merely mocking two fictional office workers, but still.

‘But why do these trashy people feel so familiar?’

Right. Lost in thought, Seungpyo realized the source of the déjà vu and nodded.

They resembled the creeps who had clung to Ryu Jaemin’s SNS account. The perverts who had been eager to bite and harass an unknown high school boy, their eyes red and drooling. Nameless trash spread like mold everywhere.

…Thinking about it like that made it harder to understand Ryu Jaemin. Even if it was only online, it couldn’t be compared to something happening in a virtual world like a game.

Even Seungpyo felt this unpleasant after hearing a few nonsensical remarks from the trash on an anonymous bulletin board. Ryu Jaemin had voluntarily gathered these malicious people and shared his nude photos and videos as bait, giggling along with them. Not for a short period, but for over a year.

Model student Ryu Jaemin had said he wanted to do bad things secretly, and that this, which could be done just by running an online account, was the most cost-effective choice. But there were many other ways to rebel online besides posting nude pictures and becoming the target of perverts. But he specifically chose that.

The content of the comments he had just dismissed as meaningless nonsense and deleted replayed vividly in his mind.

‘It’s not boredom, it’s sexual frustration.’

‘Fucking will solve it.’

‘Ask your FWB too. He might be feeling real boredom because you’re not doing it.’

Was that really it?

Even if what he was feeling was boredom, there was no guarantee Ryu Jaemin felt the same way. The reason Ryu Jaemin had been frowning and sulking after kissing lately might be because of sexual frustration, just like those trashy people said. A pervert understands a pervert’s heart. The kind of people Ryu Jaemin hung out with probably knew him better than Seungpyo did.

…But it was Jaemin who first said they should go back to just kissing. On the day he stayed at Jaemin’s house, Seungpyo had even asked what he liked best among the things they did that day, but hadn’t Ryu Jaemin given a firm answer? They would only be able to be physical at school from now on, so they couldn’t do things like that day again, so don’t get ahead of yourself.

“Then, it’s okay if it’s not at school…?”

Seungpyo, muttering to himself without realizing it, abruptly got up from his bed. Mulling over the words of the perverts he shouldn’t even be thinking about was leading his thoughts in strange directions.

Still in his school uniform, Seungpyo quickly undressed and went into the bathroom to take a shower. As he hurriedly washed himself and came out, a message from his brother arrived, saying he wouldn’t be home until dawn.

He replied with a simple “Okay” and dried his hair and changed his clothes. Feeling refreshed both physically and mentally, he sat down at his desk.

For the last midterms, because of the bet with Ryu Jaemin, he had been in a frenzy studying for more than a month, but for these finals, there was no carrot dangling in front of him.

However, Seungpyo still wanted to beat Ryu Jaemin, who always ranked first in the school, and he intended to steadily prepare for the final exam of the semester from now on.

Opening his book and underlining multiple-choice questions, Seungpyo read each of the given answers. He had to choose the correct answer among the options designed to confuse the test-taker.

└ It’s not boredom, it’s sexual frustration.

An irrelevant option intruded into his mind. His eyes were reading the questions, but the wrong answer kept circling in his head like an option on a multiple-choice test. He didn’t want to be swayed by the dirty perverts’ tricks, but he couldn’t stop thinking about it even though he knew it was the wrong answer.

But to say it was because of sexual frustration… Ryu Jaemin was quite self-controlled. During the last midterms, kissing had been forbidden until the bet was over.

Seungpyo had been anxious to rub lips with Jaemin every time he saw him, but Jaemin had been as serene as the Buddha statue he had seen on the school trip. Seungpyo, dumbfounded that he was the only one feeling restless, had asked if Jaemin didn’t feel anything. Ryu Jaemin, that guy, had replied that just watching Seungpyo get frustrated was enough to relieve his stress.

└ He’s already slept with another guy, not you lol.

“Ah, seriously.”

While thinking it was ridiculous, that comment kept coming back to him, so Seungpyo leaned his head back against the headrest of his chair.

Ryu Jaemin had said he hadn’t had sex yet. He had been serious when he said why would he meet those people and risk having his personal information exposed, and Seungpyo had agreed with him. Even if Seungpyo had run that kind of account, he wouldn’t want to meet someone who was hitting on him there. He would avoid them if anything.

Recalling these thoughts brought to mind a conversation they had about a month ago, and Jaemin’s seemingly indifferent reply.

‘I like someone who’s comfortable to be with.’

The internet perverts who had just left comments were trash, but at least they were older than Seungpyo. They were older and more experienced, so they had pointed out something Seungpyo hadn’t even imagined: that you should never mess with someone from work.

If he had to choose someone to actually have sex with, someone like that would probably be much more comfortable. Not a clueless high school classmate like Oh Seungpyo.

Seungpyo stared blankly at the ceiling with his head tilted back. Ryu Jaemin’s image seemed to flicker somewhere between the empty space and his gaze.

When he had sucked on his nipples, when he had spread his legs and fidgeted in his father’s solemn study, when he had lain on the bed beneath him, panting breathlessly…

His heart began to race. Feeling a rush of blood to his lower body, Seungpyo jumped up and quickly did twenty push-ups.

After cooling his head a little, he picked up his phone. He went to his SNS message box with Jaemin and called out to him.

What are you doing?

But even after waiting for a long time, no reply came.

He might have already fallen asleep, or he might have put his phone down because he was at home. Seungpyo sighed and picked up his pen again. The sound of the lead scratching against the paper was the only sign of life in the quiet house for a long time.

📚

The weather had become noticeably hotter.

Even though the sky was clear, there were fewer children playing on the playground than usual. With the sudden rise in temperature, more students preferred to lounge around in cool places rather than sweating outside.

During lunchtime, while the other students spent their remaining time as they pleased after finishing their meals, Seungpyo and Jaemin, as usual, secretly sought out a shady spot to hide. Today, they were lucky. Because the biology teacher had asked Seungpyo to run an errand, they were able to enjoy some time alone in the empty lab.

“It’s hot…”

Jaemin whispered, his small voice thick with humidity.

Having plenty of time was nice, but classrooms that weren’t in use had a fatal flaw. Due to the sudden heat, the school had turned on the air conditioning unexpectedly, but the merciful cool air didn’t reach the classrooms that weren’t being used. Since they couldn’t open the windows wide, they had to endure the heat during their secret rendezvous.

However, despite complaining about the heat, they hugged and kissed each other just like yesterday. Seungpyo once again covered Jaemin’s murmuring lips with his own. He swallowed the offered flesh with practiced ease.

“Mmm.”

He didn’t know how many times they had done this. While accepting Seungpyo’s tongue, which invaded his mouth whenever he tried to speak, Jaemin thought Oh Seungpyo was more persistent than usual today.

“Hup, uh.”

Seungpyo’s hand, which had been supporting Jaemin’s back, slid down to his waist. As his hand went under the hem of his uniform shirt and crept up his bare skin, Jaemin shivered, startled.

“Eut, hey. Stop it.”

He frowned and pushed Seungpyo away as if something terrible had happened, but Seungpyo didn’t budge easily and hugged his waist tighter. Then, he looked at Jaemin and opened his mouth.

“We have a lot of time today, let’s do a little more.”

“What?”

“Isn’t it boring just kissing every day?”

“If it’s boring, then don’t call me out.”

Oh Seungpyo’s bold suggestion was met with a look that said, “What nonsense are you talking about?” Jaemin brushed off Seungpyo’s arm, looking displeased.

“How many times do I have to tell you that we can only kiss at school?”

“Are you really okay with just continuing to kiss? Don’t you want to do what we did at your house again?”

“I don’t know, but I know you want to do it again.”

Jaemin straightened his clothes and gave Seungpyo a casual look. Seungpyo chewed on the inside of his cheek and then suddenly asked,

“Why did you ignore my message yesterday?”

“I told you, I saw it this morning.”

That wasn’t it. Seungpyo didn’t like the flow of the conversation. He didn’t want to speak so curtly, nor did he want to hear such answers, but on this topic, he didn’t know how to speak like his usual self.

The Oh Seungpyo in his mind was a more kind, logical, and cheerful person. But how could he ask, “Are you bored of me? Lately, kissing doesn’t feel the same. I feel like you feel the same way, but what’s the reason? If it’s sexual frustration, don’t hide it and tell me honestly”?

‘How can I possibly say something like that in a kind and cheerful way?’

The content of the conversation wouldn’t change just because he spoke softly with a bright smile. No matter how he thought about it, the moment he voiced the question, he would lose. He’d lose to Ryu Jaemin and to the low-level internet perverts, becoming the biggest fool in the world.

After pondering, Seungpyo changed the subject.

“Finals are coming up soon.”

“Yeah.”

Even Ryu Jaemin, who always ranked first, didn’t seem happy about the exams, his expression heavy as he replied.

Taking advantage of the pause in kissing, Jaemin sat on the desk. Seungpyo pulled a chair over and sat facing him.

He still didn’t know how to naturally discuss the various questions that were bothering him with Ryu Jaemin. But he knew the one surefire way that had always brought them closer since they first got involved.

“Should we make another bet?”

“Again? What are we betting on?”

“I don’t know. Let’s not decide beforehand and just say the winner gets to choose. Anyway, it’s good to make a bet because it makes us study harder.”

Now, even when he suggested a bet, Jaemin didn’t seem particularly on edge or deep in thought. His reaction was no different than when he was asked to play a game after school. He even chuckled and acted relaxed.

“You’re so persistent even though you can’t win.”

“Don’t be ridiculous. I let you win last time. If I had focused on English, I could’ve won.”

At that, Jaemin’s expression turned slightly sheepish, as if his conscience was pricked. Seungpyo finally smiled like his usual self.

“If I won the midterms, you were supposed to show me you doing it from behind, but I couldn’t see it because you won with a trick. I should’ve seen it when I went to your house.”

“Would I have shown you just because you wanted to see it?”

“I could’ve seen it. I had a wish coupon. I wasted it too easily because I was in a hurry.”

Seungpyo placed his hand on Jaemin’s thigh. He extended his index and middle fingers and slowly walked them towards his groin.

As his fingers grazed around his pelvis, Jaemin just stared down at the hand touching him with a slightly flushed face. Only when Seungpyo’s hand reached the vicinity of his fly did he quietly speak.

“If we do anything other than kissing at school…”

“Huh?”

“…it might get messy like last time. That’s why I don’t want to.”

Seungpyo’s eyes widened. Jaemin’s expression remained impassive, but he looked slightly embarrassed rather than sullen.

After a short silence, Seungpyo blurted out, his voice slightly raised,

“We can go to my house!”

“Why would we suddenly go to your house? And I have to make an excuse to my parents to go to a friend’s house.”

“We’ll go after finals if I win. I’ll make an excuse and make time no matter what.”

At that, the corners of Jaemin’s lips curved up faintly. He looked down at Seungpyo like a tiger with a puppy at its feet. His expression was full of confidence that he wouldn’t lose.

Lately, there were too many unidentified emotions driving Seungpyo. This time too, in response to Ryu Jaemin’s expression, an unknown impulse surged in his chest like a fist. Staring intently at Jaemin’s face, Seungpyo blurted out before he could even process the impulse that rose to his chest.

“Have sex with me.”

Silence enveloped them. This time, it was Jaemin whose eyes widened in surprise.

The silence that had masked the confusion was short-lived. Jaemin, bewildered as if he couldn’t believe what he had just heard, asked back,

“What?”

“……”

“Hey, you said we can’t have sex now because we have to save it for our girlfriends, right?”

Right?

It was Oh Seungpyo’s turn to be flustered after his bold remark.

“Uh, well.”

Seungpyo hurriedly opened his mouth to correct his runaway comment, but no suitable words came to mind.

“As you said…it’s weird to do everything else but not have sex.”

“What’s weird about it? It’s not weird.”

“Practice!”

Seungpyo, rambling, snapped his fingers as if a good idea had struck him and made eye contact. Jaemin looked sullen, as if asking, “What are you talking about?”

“I thought about it, and I think it would be good for us to practice before we get girlfriends. There’s no point in saving it, our girlfriends aren’t going to praise us for it. It’s a hundred times better to be good at it, right?”

“So you want to practice…that…with me?”

“Well…it’ll be a little different from doing it with a girl, but the basics should be similar.”

He explained earnestly, using the hastily concocted excuse, but Jaemin didn’t look convinced at all. It was natural for him to find the sudden change of heart strange, considering Seungpyo had adamantly insisted until recently that he couldn’t have sex with a guy.

He should’ve laughed it off as a joke instead of making excuses. The foolish regret came to Seungpyo a beat too late. His mind seemed to have completely frozen, unable to function properly.

Should he say it was a joke now? He thought it wasn’t too late, but the words that had jumped out so readily before wouldn’t come out easily now, even when he tried to say them deliberately. It was as if something deep inside him refused to dismiss it as a joke.

“You don’t hate it anyway.”

Instead of what he should have said, a string of irrelevant words tumbled out.

Sometimes, a person has to choose between what they need and what they want. The heart of one who ignores what is needed and chases what is desired pounded like that of someone about to embark on an unknown adventure.

“You said what we did last time was the same as sex. Doesn’t that mean we can actually do it?”

“No, last time you did as you pleased. I didn’t intend to go that far.”

“You didn’t hate it. You liked it too, right?”

Jaemin didn’t readily deny that question. He couldn’t have possibly hated it. Not after panting so hard, their dicks pressed together, him lying beneath Seungpyo.

Even words spoken by mistake could become an opportunity if handled well. Seungpyo was gradually regaining his composure. He didn’t want to pay attention to the trashy comments, but he didn’t think there was no basis to what those people had unanimously said yesterday: that sex would solve the problem, that it wasn’t boredom but sexual frustration.

At least he could test it. If the reason Ryu Jaemin insisted on only kissing these days was simply because he was worried about getting his body or clothes dirty and having to clean up afterward, then if that was resolved, it meant they could do things like they did last time.

It wasn’t a subjective opinion but an objective fact that Ryu Jaemin was a pervert who even ran a nude photo account. Could such a person, who had said with his own mouth, “Isn’t this just sex?”, really be satisfied with just kissing again? No.

While Seungpyo confidently answered his own question, Jaemin finally responded cautiously.

“I’ve never really thought that I had to have my first time with someone I’m dating….”

Of course. It would be stranger if a guy with the heart of a whore, even though his body was still a virgin, had normal ideas about chastity. Seungpyo nodded at the unsurprising remark.

“I thought so.”

“Even so…if we do that, won’t we really become gay?”

“Gay means a man who likes men. We’re not dating, and we don’t like each other, so why would we be? We’re just practicing to be good when we have girlfriends later. It’s not that at all. Right now, it’s hard for either of us to date, so we have no choice but to do it with each other.”

Seungpyo shrugged and added,

“And this is the bet condition if I win. You don’t have to do it if you don’t want to after I win.”

“Ah, right.”

As if he had remembered something he had forgotten, Jaemin’s eyes sharpened.

Ryu Jaemin’s face, which had been drooping lately as if he wasn’t having fun even when they were together, hugging and kissing, started to brighten like a watered plant.

“If you don’t want to do it, just win.”

“Stop pretending you don’t want to.”

“I’m not pretending. I really don’t want to.”

Ryu Jaemin, mocking him, was giggling for the first time in a while.

A pervert pretending otherwise. He should be grateful that Seungpyo was willing to use the dick he’d been saving for true love on him.

Although he was slightly annoyed by how excited he seemed at the prospect of not having to do it if he won, Oh Seungpyo decided to let it slide. Seeing Ryu Jaemin happy after a while made him think it was a good idea to suggest the bet. Whether the reason for their recent listlessness was sexual frustration or boredom, it was clear they needed new stimulation.

“Come here.”

Seungpyo pulled Jaemin’s arm. Jaemin, who had been sitting on the desk with only his buttocks perched on the edge, lost his balance and was pulled, almost falling into Seungpyo’s lap.

“I almost fell.”

Despite grumbling, Jaemin didn’t get up from Seungpyo’s lap. Seungpyo’s hands gently caressed Jaemin’s neck and cupped his cheeks.

“Hup…”

Their lips, which had met countless times today alone, pressed together again without a hint of weariness. Jaemin, who had been complaining about the heat, also seemed to find it unimportant in these moments, wrapping his arms around Seungpyo’s neck.

The moist sounds as their lips touched and parted, as tongues slowly intertwined, gently tickled their ears. The sounds between their lips mixed with the faint chirping of birds outside the window, making them feel strangely hazy.

Seungpyo left Jaemin’s lips, which he had been persistently pursuing, and pressed his lips against the white neck that was now at eye level, thanks to Jaemin sitting on his lap.

“Ah…!”

Jaemin’s buttocks, pressed against Seungpyo’s thighs, tensed slightly. Seungpyo tightened his grip around Jaemin’s waist, preventing him from pulling away and standing up.

Ryu Jaemin’s worries were also Seungpyo’s. If any bodily fluids got on their uniforms at school, they couldn’t secretly handwash them like they could at home.

So Seungpyo didn’t bite and suck on his fair skin or nibble on his neck like he had in the Ferris wheel at the amusement park or at Jaemin’s house. He just brought his lips to the neck and collarbone area, gently revealed between the open collar of his shirt, and rubbed his face against it.

“Mm…”

Jaemin, who had let out a surprised gasp, seemed to relax, letting Seungpyo have his way with his neck without resistance. He didn’t even try to lift himself from Seungpyo’s firm thighs.

Seungpyo closed his eyes and pressed his lips against the spot where Jaemin’s neck met his shoulder. Haa, haa. Just listening to Jaemin’s increasingly ragged breathing was enough to make him hard, so he couldn’t do this for too long.

On a hot day, even the slightest brush of someone else’s skin was enough to raise irritability levels. But strangely…Jaemin’s slightly warmed body smelled good, making Seungpyo reluctant to pull away even in the heat. Jaemin also seemed to feel the same way, as his arms, wrapped around Seungpyo’s neck, remained even after their kiss ended.

Seungpyo’s arms tightened around Ryu Jaemin’s waist. Just kissing, just sucking on his nipples, just touching him with his hands felt amazing, so he couldn’t even imagine how good actual sex would feel. Seungpyo asked, the corners of his lips lifting,

“Don’t you think sex would feel really good?”

“You can’t do it anyway if I win.”

“You’re acting like you’re not a pervert, even though you are. What are you going to do if you win?”

“I’ll think about it. I can’t let you get away with something nice after I win.”

Don’t be so stingy, what’s the big deal? Jaemin slowly got up from Seungpyo’s lap, grumbling. As he sat back on the desk, his face was a little redder than before they kissed.

Jaemin coughed softly and adjusted his ruffled collar. As he smoothed out his clothes, as if also tidying up his embarrassment, he said,

“Today is the last time until finals. Since we made a bet, kissing is also forbidden from now on.”

Seungpyo’s face fell at those words.

“Again? Why?”

“I told you, I plan my study schedule down to the second. I’m going to do that again.”

“Hey, you can just include kissing time in your schedule.”

“And during exam periods, it seems more efficient not to kiss or anything. Especially since you get all worked up. If we made a bet, I should naturally do what’s advantageous to me.”

“Why do you keep pretending you’re not into it? What’s the point if we don’t do it? You’re just going to jerk off at home anyway.”

Just a few minutes ago, he had been pleased that Jaemin seemed energized thanks to the bet. Now, Seungpyo was on the verge of regretting his suggestion.

“Just you wait. You’ll regret it.”

“Why would I? I’m going to win anyway.”

“You almost lost last time, what makes you so confident?”

Seungpyo narrowed his eyes slightly and pushed his face closer to Jaemin.

“Listen carefully. If I win, keep either Saturday or Sunday, a whole weekend day, free. I’m going to play with you for at least twelve hours. I can’t stand these little bits and pieces at school anymore.”

He finally voiced the ambition he had harbored during the last midterms. Jaemin gulped, seemingly slightly intimidated by the fierce declaration of war.

But Jaemin’s eyes also narrowed. His retort was sharp and undaunted.

“You’re the pervert for even thinking about that.”

“Do you think I’m doing this for no reason? I learned it all from you.”

“If we stay here any longer, we’ll just keep hearing nonsense. Let’s go. It’s really hot now.”

Since Jaemin showed no signs of offering his lips again, there was no point in staying in the lab without air conditioning. Jaemin opened the door.

“Wow, that’s better.”

Jaemin murmured. The refreshing breeze blowing in from the open windows made the hallway much cooler than the classroom.

Seungpyo put his hands in his pockets and sullenly followed Jaemin, who was a few steps ahead. The neatly arranged black hair on the back of his straight, white neck, which he had been nuzzling just moments ago, swayed gently in the breeze.

Was it thanks to the kind cleaning lady who washed and ironed his clothes every day? Ryu Jaemin’s uniform shirt, despite being wrinkled from being rubbed and pulled up while they were pressed against each other, looked much neater and cleaner than Seungpyo’s. The clear, subtle scent he had smelled while they were hugging might have been from his carefully maintained uniform.

Staring blankly at his picture-perfect back brought to mind words he had completely forgotten lately, words from the elderly that he occasionally heard when he visited his grandmother’s neighborhood as a child, now swirling in the refreshing early summer breeze like dark ash.

He must have lacked affection from his mother right after he was born, his father must have been always away from home working to feed his sons, he shows signs of growing up without affection.

Oh Seungpyo was so perfect. He was tall and handsome enough to be scouted by entertainment agencies, he was smart enough to always be at the top of his class, and he was athletic enough to always be missed by the basketball coach. No one looked down on him.

Yet, the elderly in the neighborhood would click their tongues and say that Seungpyo showed signs of growing up without affection. When he was younger, he felt wronged by such gazes, and now he just scoffed at them, thinking they were senile…but, how should he put it?

Looking at Jaemin walking ahead, he felt like he could understand what those elderly people were trying to say a little.

Was this what a person who had received affection looked like? Would everyone become like Ryu Jaemin if they grew up receiving affection in a good family?

Even though Ryu Jaemin was messing around with trashy perverts on SNS and doing things with a classmate that would get them suspended at the very least, he never looked frivolous or vulgar, not even for a moment.

Seungpyo felt like a block of wood, yet to be shaped into something, while Ryu Jaemin seemed like a work of art, meticulously crafted from head to toe. Of course, even as a block of wood, Oh Seungpyo would be top-grade material, incomparable to other wood.

“Is it because your mother is an art professor?”

“Huh?”

Jaemin turned his head at Seungpyo’s muttering. Seungpyo momentarily forgot to breathe and met his gaze.

The summer shade cast over his indifferent face made his fair skin and summer uniform shirt seem tinged with a light green. Bright, fluffy clouds were billowing in the blue sky outside the window.

Jaemin asked again,

“What about my mother?”

“No, I was just wondering if she does sculptures since she’s an art professor.”

“Why suddenly? Are you thinking of going to art school now?”

“Just wondering.”

When Seungpyo brushed it off, Jaemin simply looked unimpressed and didn’t pry further. Seungpyo quickly moved to Jaemin’s side and changed the subject.

“Have you thought about what you’ll do for the bet condition?”

“Sort of.”

“What is it?”

“It’s a secret for now.”

“I told you mine. You’re just so sneaky.”

“Who told you to tell me? You babbled on even though I didn’t ask.”

They bickered like usual as if nothing had happened, heading back to the classroom. About a month until the finals, and after the exams, summer vacation.

The first semester of their second year, which had felt so long, was coming to an end.