GMLS Ch 36

Meanwhile, Muryun’s heart was just as complicated.

He had thought he would simply be happy to see him, but that wasn’t the case. As soon as he saw Yihwa, the desire that had been curled up inside him was the first to stretch. It was all the more so because he already knew that the nature of his and Yihwa’s feelings were different.

However, Muryun already knew how to calm his insides, which were boiling like a wildfire. All he had to do was confess, “I love you.” Yihwa’s reaction would be obvious. He would likely accept it, saying, “If that is your will,” regardless of his own feelings.

Muryun’s fist, hidden inside his sleeve, clenched tightly. That was not what he wanted. What he wanted was more whole and perfect. He was in no position to criticize Wi Junghyuk. He too was a truly foolish and frustrating man.

Thinking this, Muryun burst into a hearty laugh. To Yihwa, who looked up at him in surprise, Muryun smiled affectionately.

He knew that Yihwa had a talent for making him feel like a great person. But he never knew he also had the talent to make him aware of an aspect of himself he didn’t even know existed.

‘So the reason I’ve lived so unfeelingly until now was simply because I had nothing to be greedy for.’

The desire he had realized for the first time was like a giant beast. It was large enough, sinister enough, and tenacious enough to swallow him whole if he wasn’t careful.

Muryun calmly settled his heart. The beast, though ferocious and huge, was not stupid. It knew how to endure, gnawing at its own heart, in order to fully obtain what it truly wanted.

‘So, unless you say you like me, this feeling will be left alone.’

Staring at the still-bewildered Yihwa, Muryun let his imagination run wild. It was the kind of imagination that would make Yihwa flee in horror if he ever found out.

At the same time, Muryun sneered at himself. To think that even though he sat on the throne of The Geum Empire, called the master of the world, he was indulging in such delusions because he couldn’t obtain the one thing he wanted most.

‘No. Come to think of it, it’s as if I already have half of it in my hands. The nature of his feelings can be changed, after all. Since he holds good feelings for me, it won’t be difficult to lead that naive fellow in the direction I want.’

To obtain the other half, Muryun began to work behind the scenes.

“You seem to be keeping more distance than before. Have I become awkward to you while we were apart? Or are you planning to distance yourself from me now that I’ve become emperor?”

His voice was tinged with disappointment. It also sounded like someone who was hurt, trying hard to pretend they weren’t.

Yihwa wanted to shout that it was absurd, but the words couldn’t leave his mouth. Muryun was probably joking about his own awkwardness, but because he had already made up his mind to leave, his heart sank.

Muryun, who was focusing all his attention on Yihwa, down to a single eyelid and the movement of a fingertip, immediately noticed his unusual reaction. Muryun’s face hardened.

“Don’t tell me you were truly thinking such a thing.”

Frost crept into his regal voice.

Yihwa’s mind cleared, and he bowed his head again. What was I thinking? Even if I am to leave, I refuse to go with such a misunderstanding.

“Absolutely not. It’s just that I was in awe of Your Majesty’s magnificent presence…”

In his rush to speak, he had blurted out the inner thoughts he was supposed to hide. Oops. Yihwa quickly shut his mouth, but it was already too late.

“Is that what you thought?”

Muryun, who had come down from the dais at some point, knelt on one knee in front of Yihwa. The Milyeonggun, who were watching, shifted their bottoms restlessly.

‘H-he!’

‘To put his knee, which is like the heavens, on the floor!’

There was an uproar behind the rafters and pillars.

The eunuchs, standing in the corner as if they weren’t there, were just as anxious. What emperor in the world kneels to a subject? Whether it was one knee or two, the fact that he had knelt didn’t make a big difference.

But unlike the fidgety Milyeonggun, the eunuchs were outwardly calm. Having been in the Imperial Palace for a while, they observed the prostrated Yihwa more carefully.

They already knew the emperor’s favor was great, as he had been singing his praises day in and day out. However, they were now keenly aware that even that was a gross underestimation.

‘Perhaps he has already received the imperial grace. His Majesty was once in the Ministry of War. It’s obvious what happens in a unit overflowing with vigorous young men. Since those at the top turn a blind eye, it wouldn’t be strange at all if he picked up something there.’

Of all the people present, the eunuchs’ misunderstanding was the deepest. Of course, whether it would remain just a misunderstanding or not depended on Muryun’s future actions.

“Lift your head.”

It was the voice of a lord, not an emperor. The same regal voice that had coaxed and soothed him while giving him sweets. Yihwa, as if bewitched, straightened his curled body and raised his head.

When their eyes met, Muryun smiled like a bad adult luring an innocent child.

“Stand at ease. No, just be comfortable. Like you were in The North Palace.”

At the mention of The North Palace, his stiff shoulders visibly relaxed.

It was just as he had expected. Although Yihwa had denied it, he must have felt awkward with him sitting on the imperial throne. Hmm. Come to think of it, how impudent. Did he see me as the type of person who would change completely just because my position changed?

Muryun neatly concealed his simmering insides. Instead, he put on the guise of a world’s most affectionate and gentle superior. And he gently took Yihwa’s still-unfurled hand.

Holding the twitching fingers in his palm and rolling them around, Muryun asked.

“Am I making you uncomfortable?”

He deliberately omitted the imperial pronoun “Zhen.”

“Don’t be. I have just ascended the throne, and there are few I can rely on in this vast and desolate Imperial Palace. If you, one of them, are wary of me, who can I lean on?”

It was a truly outrageous statement, one that would make all the civil and military officials who served him, including the Imperial Guards and Milyeonggun, aghast.

The eyes of the eunuchs and the Milyeonggun were fixed on Yihwa. Hurry up and say no. Tell him to retract his preposterous words.

But Yihwa, who despite his cleverness had not lost his naivete, was completely unaware. Rather, he was even more surprised than before and had to clutch at his heart, which was falling with a thud.

Could it be that Muryun knows I’m planning to leave? Does he also know that my name is already written in the register of the messenger from the underworld?

Muryun, of course, had no way of knowing that he was unable to answer because he was trying to calm his pounding heart.

“Why is there no answer?”

It was a pretty crown of the head. Muryun thought he wanted to open it up. What on earth was he thinking in that head of his to have such a reaction? He hadn’t even had such thoughts when he saw Yihwa hanging upside down from the magnolia tree.

That was how strange Yihwa was today. At first, he thought it was because he was unfamiliar with his appearance in the dragon robe, but even so, it was an excessive reaction.

“I see. You know your sin.”

Muryun’s eyes narrowed. Yihwa no longer had a heart left to fall.

“I never intended to deceive you.”

At his trembling, eventual confession, Muryun’s misunderstanding hardened into certainty.

“I’m sure that’s what you’d say. But to blatantly lie just because my eyes couldn’t see?”

“I was just… Your Majesty? Huh?”

“Do you have any idea how I felt when I later saw you lying there, covered in blood? Did you even think about that devastation?”

“…”

“I’m sure you didn’t. If you had, you wouldn’t have thrown your body around so recklessly. Who told you to do that? Even if I became emperor by you sacrificing your life, did you think I would be the slightest bit happy!”

As he spoke, the feelings from that time resurfaced, and he became overly agitated. Muryun only realized his mistake when he saw the frozen Yihwa. He quickly relaxed his expression.

In any case, Yihwa was safe in the end. His anger, too, had long been buried and extinguished by his longing. If it hadn’t, both Monghyul and Wi Junghyuk would have been holding hands and heading straight for the underground prison the moment they set foot in the capital. If that had happened, regardless of the circumstances, Muryun would not have been able to avoid a scandal for having discarded two of his chief contributors.

Yihwa had saved several people without even knowing it, but a weight was hanging on his heart.

Everything was just as Muryun had said. At that time, he could only think of saving Muryun. No, his body had moved before he could even think.

Even if the same situation were to arise, he would surely make the same choice. He couldn’t say, not even as an empty promise, that he would never do it again. Above all, in the future, even if the same situation were to arise, he would not be the one in that position.

Yihwa remained silent with a heavy heart.

“It is proper to bestow a reward for meritorious service. I gave you silk and a horse because there were eyes watching, but if I had my way, I would have wanted to order you to be confined. It has subsided a bit now, but when I was angry to the point of my head boiling, I even thought of revoking your position as Captain of the Guard.”

He wasn’t just saying it in a fit of anger. Muryun had truly had such thoughts. It was a crystal-clear fact that the reason Yihwa was gravely injured was because of him. The beast inside him had growled, saying it was a good idea to wrap him up tightly and put him in the rear palace on this occasion.

‘No. That won’t do.’

A long, gnarled hand soothed the beast. That was the worst of the worst moves, a last resort to be used in an unavoidable situation. Of course, the option of never using it under any circumstances did not exist.

Muryun rose and sat back on the dais. He created a solemn posture, paying attention to every gesture and movement, and said.

“I have no need for a sword that does not move according to my will.”

Hmm. Truly the image of a solemn emperor.

Muryun praised himself internally. In the hand behind his back, he now held a carrot… no, a sweet. Having finished all his preparations, he carefully observed Yihwa’s reaction.

While Muryun was thus calculating when to offer the sweet, Yihwa’s head was rolling in a completely different direction.