PSY CH 84

By the time they got up to the room, night had already fallen. Jooyoung, looking exhausted, collapsed onto the bed without even washing up. It was Dohyun who unpacked their things in his place, while Jooyoung lay there blinking blankly at the ceiling. There wasn’t much luggage to begin with, which made it even harder to figure out the reason why they came to Seoul. And also, the time they spent together today…

“I can’t be away for too long.”

Jooyoung’s head slowly turned toward him.

“You said Hangyeol agreed to watch your store, didn’t you?”

“That punk’s a scatterbrain. I can’t leave him in charge for too long.”

“…He says you’re the clumsy one.” 

Dohyun, who happened to be looking at his newly bought phone, couldn’t argue with that. Feeling sheepish, he put the phone down with a light thud, pretending it was nothing. Then he suddenly recalled how Jooyoung had picked at his dinner absentmindedly, barely eating. He hadn’t said he was hungry, but Dohyun felt like he should get him something to eat anyway, so he reached for his wallet.

“Where are you going?”

Jooyoung suddenly sat up and asked in a startled voice. His golden eyes trembled with unease, like he’d just seen someone about to leave him behind.

“I asked where you’re going.”

He jumped off the bed and quickly crossed the room without waiting for an answer. Then, out of nowhere, he snatched Dohyun’s wallet from his hand, as if trying to stop him from going anywhere.

“You barely ate dinner.”

Only then did Jooyoung relax, letting out a soft ah and dropping the anxious look. But even so, he still didn’t seem happy about Dohyun going out alone, responding in a grumpy tone.

“I’m not hungry.”

“…”

“Well, if you want to eat, just order room service.”

“I’m fine. I just thought you might be hungry.”

Jooyoung rolled his eyes, then set the wallet down and tugged on Dohyun’s sleeve. It wasn’t a strong pull—easily resistible—but Dohyun let himself be led without a fight.

“Then…”

With a soft thump, Jooyoung sat back down on the bed and looked up at him. The hand that had been tugging his sleeve moved down to gently grasp Dohyun’s fingertips.

“Just stay and hang out with me.”

“…”

“Huh? Dohyun-ah.”

He gave his hand a little shake as he spoke, and Dohyun abruptly turned his head away. Even though Jooyoung was smiling playfully, he couldn’t bring himself to meet his eyes.

“Or… do you want to do something else?” 

But at those next words, he couldn’t keep staring into space. 

“What did you say?”

You didn’t have to be a genius to understand what Jooyoung meant by “something else.” Though he was smiling mischievously, his gaze was direct, and the subtle tone in his voice made the implication all too clear.

“…”

A creeping doubt rose in Dohyun’s chest. Even though he had agreed when Jooyoung asked to be in a relationship, that didn’t mean all his suspicions had vanished. And now, with Jooyoung acting in a way that didn’t feel like him—it wasn’t joy Dohyun felt, but anxiety. He feared that his worries might turn out to be true.

“You…”

After hesitating, he was about to ask if Jooyoung had another reason for coming to Seoul. If there was a real reason he dragged Dohyun along. But Jooyoung beat him to it.

“How was today?”

He toyed with Dohyun’s fingers, the way a kitten might nibble with its tiny teeth—light and ticklish.

“Was it boring?”

“…What are you talking about.”

“We went on a date today, didn’t we?”

Hearing that, Dohyun’s face crumpled like a piece of paper. Of course, he’d thought the same thing, but he had long given up on the hope of hearing Jooyoung say it out loud. So the sudden confirmation left him flustered.

“…What’s a date? Don’t we usually hang out like this anyway?”

Every time Jooyoung called him to Seoul, they’d hung out in much the same way. Dohyun brought that up, insisting that what they did today wasn’t necessarily a date. More than anything…

“So you didn’t like it?”

“It’s not that I didn’t like it…”

Dohyun swallowed a sigh before saying, “You could’ve told me in advance.”

“…”

“And you kept spacing out the whole time anyway…”

He trailed off, not wanting to sound like he was whining. Jooyoung, who had been watching him silently, suddenly burst into laughter.

“So you were upset about it?”

Even his voice was playful as he asked. But at the same time, he held Dohyun’s hand tightly and said, “Sorry, I kept spacing out. I was just feeling a little… off.” He didn’t forget to apologize. 

“…”

It felt like he’d been transported back to their childhood. Dohyun bit his lips, caught in that strange, nostalgic emotion.

“Come here.”

Jooyoung, now lying on the bed, tugged his hand. 

“…Wash up first before you sleep.”

“Hurry up.”

“Haa…””

With no choice, Dohyun lay down beside him, but his heart was pounding so hard it could probably reach Jooyoung’s ears. He lay flat on his back and covered his face with his arm. If he didn’t, he felt like Jooyoung might catch the strange expression loosening on his face.

“…”

Jooyoung turned to face him and let out an even breath, then suddenly asked, “Then do you always say in advance, ‘This is a date,’ before going on one?”

“Ah, damn.”

Dohyun immediately realized he was being teased and shot up. As Jooyoung laughed, he rubbed his face roughly with an arm propped on his knee. Still, the flush on his cheeks wouldn’t go away.

“I’m seriously just curious.”

Dohyun stared at the ceiling for a long time before muttering, “…I’ve never been on a date.”

“Huh?”

The unexpected answer snapped Jooyoung wide awake. He looked up at Dohyun with wide, alert eyes and asked again.

“You’ve never been on a date?”

“…”

“Why not?”

Dohyun lowered his head, then slowly rubbed the back of his neck. His eyes still didn’t meet Jooyoung’s—they stayed fixed on empty space. Then he tapped Jooyoung’s cheek lightly with his right hand.

“Why haven’t you ever been on one?” Jooyoung tried to read between the lines, then thought—no way. “You’ve never dated anyone?”

“…Yeah. I haven’t.”

He couldn’t believe it. It wasn’t like Dohyun had no connection to women—there had been a girl he slept with regularly. And more than anything, Dohyun was so good-looking that even strangers turned for a second glance. He’d been scrawny as a kid, but by middle school, he’d shot up in height and filled out with a solid frame, always drawing people’s attention.

His personality was blunt, but he had a quiet, affectionate side, so women probably hadn’t disliked him. The more Jooyoung thought about it, the stranger it seemed.

“Then with that girl… it was just sleeping together?”

Jooyoung didn’t need to clarify who he meant. Dohyun knew right away.

“That was…!”

Dohyun opened his mouth to argue but quickly realized he had no excuse and shut it again, awkwardly. Jooyoung wasn’t angry, but facing his own past mistakes still left Dohyun feeling uneasy. Seeing his frozen expression and how he struggled to speak, Jooyoung decided to stop teasing him.

“Lie down. I’m gonna sleep.”

He gave a soft chuckle and pulled Dohyun down by the arm. Dohyun hesitated, then reluctantly lay down beside him. As if he’d been waiting, Jooyoung pressed up close, and Dohyun instinctively held his breath.

“Don’t go anywhere.”

He didn’t feel like much had changed just because they were dating, but maybe that was just his own misunderstanding. Jooyoung acted with complete ease, as if the distance that had once existed between them had vanished entirely. While Dohyun was still dazed and uncertain, Jooyoung seemed completely unfazed.

“I wouldn’t do this kind of thing with someone I didn’t feel anything for.”

Maybe, for Jooyoung, the change in their relationship mattered more than any internal emotional shift. Maybe just becoming his boyfriend was enough of a reason to erase the careful boundaries he’d kept.

“…”

Dohyun looked down at Jooyoung, who had fallen asleep and was now breathing evenly. His gaze lingered on that peaceful face for a long moment before drifting to the hand beside it. His left hand, lying unguarded next to the pillow—and the faint mark on his fourth finger.

Jooyoung had spent plenty of time under Maeyang’s scorching sun, yet he never tanned. So if a mark like that was left behind… just how long had he been wearing that ring?

Dohyun imagined the ring that had once sat on that slender finger.

“…”

Maybe… it was still too early to get matching rings.

“Ah, damn…”

The sudden thought made him cover his eyes with his hand. He hadn’t even fully gotten rid of his doubts, and here he was imagining a future together like a fool.

If he was going to be like this, he might as well trust Jooyoung properly. 

Dohyun pressed his temples with frustration. Even so, his hypersensitive thoughts refused to quiet down. He kept picturing Jooyoung’s pale face, lost in thought, never turning back when called.

***

The 8th floor, where the reception desk was, had been bustling since early morning with guests coming and going. 

While Jooyoung was checking out, Dohyun waited on a sofa in the lobby. Whether he realized people were eyeing him or not, he sat with a perpetually uneasy look on his face. His left cheek puffed and deflated, and he fidgeted with his hands, twisting them one way then the other.

Even that restless energy somehow fit well with Dohyun’s raw, rough-around-the-edges vibe, drawing even more attention. Yet Dohyun himself kept his eyes either on the floor or toward where Jooyoung stood—never glancing at anything else.

Not long after, Jooyoung finished checking out and turned around. Dohyun stood up immediately and walked toward him. But then Jooyoung suddenly stopped mid-step, looking at something or someone off in the distance.

“…”

His brows furrowed, and he didn’t look away for a long time. Like he’d spotted someone he knew. Dohyun’s gaze naturally followed his.

There stood a man with his hair slicked back and a crisp shirt on. A thick, shiny watch glinted from under his neatly rolled-up sleeve.

And then, Jooyoung did something unexpected. He suddenly strode straight toward the man. It all happened too quickly for Dohyun to stop him.