BB Ch 3 Part 2

When I came home after eating a lot of expensive dishes, the desolate atmosphere was waiting for me again.

Tuesday night at 11 p.m., a vague time to go anywhere.

I washed up and went to the refrigerator to get a can of beer.

A table for four.

A closet with one of the doors missing.

A chair with a curved back.

And a refrigerator that is making noise.

Things will lean and break down if you live in one place for a long time. But I have no intention of moving.

The owner has not raised the deposit for over 10 years.

I sat down in front of the television and drank the entire can of beer. While brushing my teeth, I was watching a drama in which a woman was crying in a man’s arms.

After taking my cold medicine, I jumped into bed.

Both the doors of the bedroom and the small room were opened and the TV was turned on.

Nevertheless, how can this loneliness disappear? Is there ever going to be a day in my life when I don’t feel lonely?

Cough, cough.

I stared blankly at the ceiling

It’s not that I haven’t tried to find a hobby that I enjoy. I also joined a photography club, purchased and watched a DVD of a well-known film. I played online games and even traveled alone.

However, while watching a movie, I only commented about the male actors. I left a club after being caught flirting with two people at the same time. In games, I fell in love and quit when my relationship ended, and while traveling, I dropped by a local gay club and had a one-night stay with a beta.

I feel ashamed when I think of the past.

My life really.

I didn’t think it would be easy to fall asleep, so I just woke up.

The eleventh ancestral rites is over.

I can’t live like this forever. I should stop dating Beta. I want to create a peaceful and happy family. If I’m going to live, I want to live as a part of a happy family.

I’m not even young anymore, so I need to get married before I turn another year older. There are ways to contact my little father, but that’s the last resort.

Let’s look for an alpha and omega dating site. Isn’t there a chance that if I smile prettily, say I’ll work and do housework, the passionate old alphas will choose me?

But I just stared at the ceiling and did nothing.

I’m sick of it. I’m sick of life. I’m tired of even thinking about this. It’s too boring.

What do people do for a living?

What the hell are people  doing with this terrible time?