119

Even as her consciousness faded, Ah-rang couldn’t hide the defiance in her gaze—perhaps she felt the same emotions as Ha-gyeom. If not for the bedsheet stuffed in her mouth like a gag, there was no telling what else she might have done.

Watching Ah-rang grow cold from blood loss while Baek Sa spoke without a hint of mercy left Ha-gyeom shaken, unsure if this was really the Baek Seung-woo he knew. Yet, if Baek Sa truly was a loyal subordinate to Assemblyman Tak, then perhaps this cruelty was part of who he had become. It was a faint instinct, but one Ha-gyeom couldn’t dismiss.

On the other hand, he remembered that Baek Sa had a clear motive—to carry out the Center’s missions. That might have been why he had hidden his true nature so thoroughly. Clinging to the last shred of hope, Ha-gyeom watched them all with a tense expression.

“What should we do?” the mercenary asked.

Even if the bleeding stopped, there was no guarantee Ah-rang wouldn’t attempt something again. Baek Sa lifted Ah-rang and passed her to the mercenary.

“Put her on the transport unconscious so she can’t pull anything like this again.”

“Sorry? Unconscious…?”

“Sedate her. Keep her under constant surveillance until we reach the destination, and if she looks like she’s going to try anything, use the drugs again to stop her.”

A chill ran through Ha-gyeom. To subdue Ah-rang’s rejection and resistance, Baek Sa had chosen a method no different from what the 0 District had done to the Kang sisters. Knowing she could hear him, how could he say such things so clinically?

Even as he pushed his designated guide—terrified before the mission—into yet another layer of suffering, Baek Sa didn’t show a single doubt about his decision.

“She’ll be seriously weakened. We do have an esper going with her to assist in guiding, but…”

“Even if she’s not in full condition, it’s better than dying.”

The mercenary, albeit reluctantly, looked up at Baek Sa and nodded. Baek Sa, watching Ah-rang’s limp body, added:

“Sending an S-rank guide—especially one with the most powerful energy in the 0 District—into the field is a major decision, even for Assemblyman Tak. This time, he’s expecting real results. I don’t want to see it fall apart from the very beginning.”

It became painfully clear to Ha-gyeom that everything was ultimately by Assemblyman Tak’s orders. At the same time, he recalled the mission Baek Sa had been assigned in this place.

Do not get involved in the affairs of that district for personal reasons.

Do whatever it takes to win the leaders’ trust.

Your goal is to become one of them entirely, and even if you lose yourself in the process, I won’t blame you.

He had committed to the mission more faithfully than anyone. While Ha-gyeom, overcome with despair, could only watch Baek Sa, the mercenary spoke again in a lowered voice.

“Sir Baek Sa, are you sure you’re okay with this?”

“What do you mean?”

“If Ah-rang leaves, you’ll lose the only guide who can stabilize you. This mission could take several months… and then there’s no one left to prevent your rampage…”

Ha-gyeom’s eyes wavered. Assemblyman Tak surely knew that. So had Baek Sa accepted this mission fully aware he was gambling with his own life?

If the mission failed and Baek Sa lost control, it would all collapse. So why?

“If Ah-rang survives, I’ll survive too.”

“……”

“Even if we fail, I have no intention of defying orders, so stop looking at me like that.”

Baek Sa, speaking coldly about something that concerned his own life, nodded toward the barely conscious Ah-rang. Only then did the mercenary respond with a sharp, disciplined voice.

“I’ll follow orders, sir!”

Ah-rang resisted, flailing in refusal. But it didn’t last long. Her body, weakened by blood loss, slowly quieted, until all movement stopped.

Seeing her condition, the mercenary gave a short bow and swiftly exited the room.

“……”

But Ha-gyeom still stood there, in the room where the sound of rain echoed against the walls.

He stared at Baek Sa’s back, standing tall at the door, at his blood-soaked shirt and hands. As he took in the blood that had pooled across the floor, a burning dryness gripped Ha-gyeom’s throat.

Baek Sa took a towel hanging from a chair and wiped his hands roughly. Not even slightly shaken by the sight of blood, he moved with complete composure. His downcast eyes and firmly closed lips were visible, but his emotions remained unreadable.

Unlike him, Ha-gyeom trembled as he watched, his eyes filled with unrelenting agitation. Then, Baek Sa walked to the floor-to-ceiling window and stood right beside him, staring into the dim world outside.

And in that moment, Baek Sa’s voice echoed in Ha-gyeom’s mind.

“If Ah-rang survives, I’ll survive too.”

“……”

“Even if we fail, I have no intention of defying orders, so stop looking at me like that.”

He knew. Baek Sa was fully aware he could lose control. Even Ah-rang—who was said to have resisted the mission more than anyone—had come to him tonight, unable to contain her fear.

And Baek Sa… knew that too. So why was he so composed?

Ha-gyeom could not bring himself to pity him. But still, he watched the man who now stood like a statue beside him, suffocated by the weight of it all. The scene, so vividly real just moments ago, began to blur and dissolve—yet Ha-gyeom didn’t move an inch.

“……”

Then, like being sucked into a whirlpool, a strange sensation swept over him.

And when he opened his eyes again, only darkness filled his vision.

Ha-gyeom lay in bed, staring at the tall window speckled with beads of rain. It had been two days since he regained consciousness, and despite not having even a sip of water, the world outside was soaked in damp, unending rain.

The relentless downpour had darkened the room so much that no lights had been turned on. His poor condition wasn’t even the problem.

It felt like he was trapped under a massive wave, flailing in the depths of his mind. The flood of memories that had surged from Ah-rang brought with them a kind of pain he had never known before.

While anxiously trying to retrace those memories, Ha-gyeom suddenly froze. He had unconsciously picked up Baek Sa’s lingering scent on the bed.

A chill ran over him. He shut his eyes tightly, then opened them again. Every fine hair on his body stood on end. He should’ve felt warmth thinking of his hyung, but it was as if something inside him had flipped—revulsion rising in place of comfort.

Just then, the soft click of the door opening and faint movement sent a tingling sensation to his fingertips. Ha-gyeom heard Baek Sa’s footsteps approaching behind him and quietly let his eyes tremble.

“Ha-gyeom.”

A warm, savory smell filled the air. Baek Sa set down a tray of food in the empty space beside the sheets and climbed onto the bed. His hand touched Ha-gyeom near the elbow. It felt nothing like the chill that shivered through him—just dry and hot.

“Ha-gyeom. You have to eat something.”

If he hadn’t seen Ah-rang’s memories, those words might have sounded nothing but kind. But now, knowing what had transpired between them…

Ha-gyeom bit down hard on his lip and pulled the covers over his head. He had been rejecting Baek Sa ever since he woke up. This time was no different—he made it clear with his entire body. A quiet sigh followed.

He had secretly sought out Assemblyman Tak and even met Ah-rang. Ha-gyeom didn’t know how Baek Sa had found out, but that same day, he had brought him back to this room. Baek Sa had clearly looked angry, though he hadn’t pressed the issue—perhaps because Ha-gyeom had been too exhausted to move.

He could set aside feelings of jealousy over the guiding between Ah-rang and Baek Sa. What tormented him more was the betrayal and pain Ah-rang had felt while by Baek Sa’s side.

Especially the night before the expedition, the intense confrontation between the two—the pressure, the ruthlessness Baek Sa had shown her. In that moment, Ha-gyeom finally understood what Baek Sa meant when he once said he had lost himself here.

“……”

Knowing something and experiencing it were two different things. So when Baek Sa reached over the covers to touch his shoulder, Ha-gyeom deliberately shuddered. He clutched the blanket and panted quietly, but suddenly the dark space turned bright—Baek Sa had pulled the covers off without asking.

Ha-gyeom curled up in protest. Then Baek Sa grabbed his wrist with overwhelming force and yanked. Though Ha-gyeom had been lying with his back turned, in a blink, he found himself facing the other way.

“What do you think would’ve happened if I hadn’t come for you when you were facing Ah-rang?”

Ha-gyeom couldn’t argue. If Baek Sa hadn’t found him in time, that presence might have devoured him whole—just like it had with Ah-rang.

The thought brought a cold wave crashing over him, and he couldn’t bear it. His complexion drained, his lips trembled uncontrollably. Just recalling what he had gone through as a guide was terrifying enough, but now, even facing the only person he could rely on in this place felt unbearable.

“Let go… it hurts.”

Even while trembling, Ha-gyeom resisted. Maybe annoyed by this stubborn defiance, Baek Sa didn’t let go of his wrist.