87

Of all dreams, it had to be that one. As soon as Ha-gyeom opened his eyes, he instinctively wiped away the tears pooling at the corners of his eyes.

His condition was noticeably better, but that wasn’t the problem. Ha-gyeom slowly lifted his head, which had been resting against Baek Sa’s arm. Baek Sa was still sound asleep, his arm draped over Ha-gyeom.

Sound asleep… Such an odd phrase to describe him. Could there be a more unfitting description?

Even in moments like this, when he was by Ha-gyeom’s side, Baek Sa rarely let his guard down. Knowing that all too well, Ha-gyeom found it almost unbelievable to see Baek Sa unarmed and asleep with his eyes closed. He stared at Baek Sa’s steady breathing, his clear skin, and the strands of hair naturally falling across his face. For a moment, it became hard to tell whether they were in the Center or District 0, and he found himself nervously biting his lower lip.

Though not as young as he had been in the dream, Baek Sa was still a strikingly handsome and magnetic man. At times, the maturity he had gained since the days when Ha-gyeom used to look up to him felt unfamiliar, but even in moments like this, when Ha-gyeom’s mind was clouded with confusion, there was no denying his appearance could provoke desire.

Ha-gyeom felt humiliated by the tension in his lower body. Even holding his breath to observe Baek Sa gave him the odd sensation of stepping into a different world, a clumsy and awkward feeling he couldn’t quite shake. He stretched out his hand but stopped himself just in time, choosing instead to quietly let the minutes pass.

Several helpless minutes ticked by. Not wanting to wake Baek Sa from what was probably a rare deep sleep, Ha-gyeom carefully sat up. The sun had yet to rise. The vivid memory of last night’s oral encounter lingered faintly, but neither of them had left any mess, so the sheets were clean apart from traces of sweat.

“I like you.”

Just recalling the words he’d repeated countless times the night before made Ha-gyeom’s face flush. He had no regrets, but he couldn’t deny that he had acted like a child, overly emotional and needy in front of Baek Sa. Trying to shake off the awkwardness, he stepped into the bathroom and took a shower. Afterward, putting his old clothes back on felt unpleasant, so he borrowed Baek Sa’s clothes before returning to the bed.

Even then, Baek Sa’s eyes remained peacefully shut. Seeing him so deeply asleep, Ha-gyeom felt genuinely baffled. In the end, he crawled onto the sheets on his knees and hesitantly brought his fingers close to Baek Sa’s nose.

Of course, he was still breathing. By now, dawn had broken, and knowing roughly when Baek Sa usually woke up, Ha-gyeom couldn’t bring himself to let him sleep any longer.

“Hyung… Don’t you think it’s time to get up?”

He lightly tapped Baek Sa’s arm, but he only stirred, not opening his eyes. Moving closer, Ha-gyeom softly patted his cheek.

“Hyung. The sun’s already up….”

At last, the tightly shut lashes fluttered open, revealing dark pupils that immediately found their focus. Ha-gyeom swallowed nervously and added in a quiet voice.

“Get up and wash up.”

His words wavered slightly, but since there was no visible reaction in Baek Sa’s gaze, Ha-gyeom decided to let it slide. He moved back to give Baek Sa space. Unlike the clingy behavior of the previous night, Baek Sa gracefully slipped out of bed. The sunlight streaming through the large window laid bare his naked body, revealing taut, sculpted muscles so finely detailed that Ha-gyeom quickly averted his eyes.

“Don’t forget,” Baek Sa had once said, “the only truly safe place for you here is this room—my room.”

Sitting at the table, Ha-gyeom replayed the brief time spent here over and over in his mind.

Learning that Baek Sa was undercover had answered many questions. However, it didn’t explain everything—especially the things Baek Sa had said and done as his current self, things Baek Seung-woo never would have done. It was nearly impossible to reconcile the two versions of him, even with the reasoning that “everything has changed” as a plausible justification.

Not unlike Baek Sa himself, District 0 also held countless mysteries. Ha-gyeom couldn’t deny that the investigations he had conducted thus far had barely scratched the surface. Reflecting on his own position as an agent sent undercover by the Center, and the fact that Baek Sa had been on a classified mission for five years prior, brought everything into sharper focus.

He had defied Baek Sa’s wishes by returning here.

From now on, nothing would be the same. Ha-gyeom was certain that last night marked a definitive turning point. He vividly remembered Baek Sa holding him close, and for once, unable to hide the turmoil in his eyes. The memory of clinging to him, pouring out his long-held feelings, now filled Ha-gyeom with a sense of embarrassment. Determined to offset Baek Sa’s concerns, he resolved to pull himself together—though that resolve faltered when he saw Baek Sa emerge from the shower dressed similarly to him.

His mind went blank at the sight. His chest, already tight with restless longing, threatened to burst.

“How’s your body?”

“Much better,” Ha-gyeom replied succinctly, his voice steady.

Baek Sa nodded, his expression unreadable, as if some invisible weight pressed on his shoulders. Ha-gyeom forced a smile to lighten the mood.

“I’ve never seen you sleep so deeply before,” he ventured, the remark sounding more like a jab than intended.

Baek Sa, surprisingly, responded without hesitation. “I did. For the first time in a while.”

The cheerful start seemed to have a positive effect. From under the table, Ha-gyeom nervously fidgeted with his hands, sneaking glances at Baek Sa’s now somewhat relaxed face. Then Baek Sa spoke again, his gaze sliding over Ha-gyeom.

“That looks like my clothes.”

Ha-gyeom froze but quickly rationalized that he couldn’t exactly remain naked. Even so, he had felt too awkward to borrow underwear and had only put on a shirt and pants. As he tried to explain, Baek Sa leaned closer, causing Ha-gyeom to clamp his lips shut.

“From now on, you’ll have your own private room.”

“Not in the shelter?”

“No. But you’ll still be monitored for a while, so remember to watch what you say and do.”

“Understood,” Ha-gyeom answered earnestly.

He wasn’t ignoring Baek Sa’s words, but his attention was drawn to the faint bruise on Baek Sa’s lower lip—a mark undoubtedly left by the rough kisses they had shared. Spotting a red mark on his neck made Ha-gyeom’s chest tighten with guilt, and his face flushed in embarrassment.

“Your routine will change from now on. Focus on keeping up and not falling behind.”

“…Yes.”

“And about your partner…”

Ha-gyeom recalled the bold declaration he had made while sitting at this very table: “If you’re still following the orders of the Center director… then it’s only right for me, someone sent here by those orders, to help you. That makes us partners now, doesn’t it?”

Though his conviction hadn’t wavered, the mention of a “partner” made Ha-gyeom blush. After all, the decision ultimately rested with Baek Sa, and he felt like he had presumptuously overstepped.

Baek Sa sighed and ran a hand down one side of his face, looking troubled. His pensive expression made Ha-gyeom’s heart pound nervously.

“I don’t know if we can pull this off,” Baek Sa muttered after a long pause. His tone wasn’t accusatory, as though blaming Ha-gyeom for his lack of skill. It was more self-reflective, as if he doubted his own ability to meet the challenge.

Ha-gyeom had expected him to dismiss his input yet again once he regained his composure, so the unexpectedly soft tone left him startled, his heart sinking.

“You know as well as I do,” Baek Sa continued, “I wasn’t exactly objective or rational when it came to you, even back then.”

It wasn’t untrue. What other esper would personally care for a child they had rescued, let alone nurse them back to health in their own room? Ha-gyeom had recovered and grown thanks to Baek Sa’s special treatment, which had drawn envy from others. He knew Baek Sa didn’t care about outside opinions—he followed his own principles, not others’.

But here, in District 0…

Even Ha-gyeom hadn’t expected that. Yet seeing Baek Sa’s current gentleness, reminiscent of his former self, brought Ha-gyeom a quiet sense of relief. If Baek Sa could treat him like this, even for a brief moment each day, Ha-gyeom felt he could endure anything this hellish place threw at him. He needed nothing more.

“What are you so afraid of?”

Ha-gyeom hadn’t been able to answer, and now he saw the ashen depths of Baek Sa’s gaze. His whispered words echoed around them.

“Losing yourself.”

Perhaps, Ha-gyeom thought, those words were meant for himself—an act of contrition. As the only one who knew about Baek Sa’s transformation, Ha-gyeom couldn’t help but speculate. Like the broken buildings outside, Baek Sa had clearly lost a part of himself. Ha-gyeom could see it in his despair and his seeming unwillingness to recover.

Lowering his eyes to Baek Sa’s hands on the table, Ha-gyeom hesitated before reaching out to cover them with his own.

“I’m not trying to make things harder for you, hyung. I just… I just want to let you know that I need to try, too, if we’re going to survive here together.”

He knew exactly what Baek Sa was worried about. Ha-gyeom also fully acknowledged that he wasn’t yet capable of standing shoulder to shoulder with him. But as a guide sent here by the Center, he couldn’t just sit back, helplessly relying on Baek Sa’s protection like a victim from long ago.

“You don’t always need force to protect someone, do you?”

Unlike Espers, guides didn’t have any offensive abilities. However, that didn’t mean their powers couldn’t be a weapon. In a world where no one could survive without the cleansing waves of a guide, their abilities were invaluable.

“I don’t think guiding is the only thing I can do to protect you, hyung.”

Despite Ha-gyeom’s unwavering determination, Baek Sa’s gaze settled on his hand. Baek Sa deftly turned it over and threaded his fingers through Ha-gyeom’s. The air shifted instantly.

“In that case, you definitely shouldn’t have made a confession like that,” Baek Sa said, though his voice was so gentle it almost tickled.

As their fingers interlocked and Baek Sa’s gaze turned sharp, Ha-gyeom felt a tightness grip his chest.

“You know as well as I do that mixing emotions with a partnership only complicates things,” Baek Sa continued, hitting the mark.

Ha-gyeom’s eyes wavered helplessly. So he really was considering making them partners? And the fact that emotions could become an obstacle… did that mean Baek Sa had already taken their feelings into account?

For a moment, Ha-gyeom clenched his teeth in frustration before responding.

“You haven’t answered me yet, hyung.”

Baek Sa didn’t back down either.

“What answer do you expect? And how exactly should I give it?”