M 104

“Brigadier General!”

The door suddenly burst open without a knock. Given the place and the current situation, it was unusual for Lieutenant Park, who normally wouldn’t even try to speak to him unless it was a significant matter, to be so boisterous.

“I’ve been informed that Lee Sehwa has regained consciousness just now!”

Ki Tae-jeong’s head, which had been staring blankly at some point on the floor, snapped up.

“I received a radio message from Lieutenant Na on my way to report to you.”

“Ah… How is Sehwa’s condition?”

Ki Tae-jeong jumped to his feet. His questioning voice was so urgent that the end of his words slightly flipped.

“They’ve only done a simple physical function test, but for now, it seems there are no major issues.”

Lieutenant Park was grinning from ear to ear. Even when he chose to change his name instead of a rank promotion, or when he finally got his resident ID card with an ordinary name, he hadn’t smiled this brightly…

Although he tried not to show it, Tae-jeong knew that Lieutenant Park had been constantly plagued by guilt.

After looking at the baby in the incubator protection room and returning to the ICU corridor, Lieutenant Park bowed deeply and asked for forgiveness.

He said he should have kept his mouth shut when the Brigadier General was going up the stairs, but he didn’t think at all that Sehwa would wake up, that he would have come out to the door, and because of his loose lips, things had turned out like this, and he was truly sorry.

To Lieutenant Park, who said he would accept any punishment even if it was just venting anger, Ki Tae-jeong firmly drew the line, saying there was no need to think that way. In fact, he had done nothing wrong. It was none other than himself who had meticulously ruined everything about Sehwa.

“Congratulations.”

Although it didn’t seem like quite the appropriate greeting, Lieutenant Park was genuinely happy. It seems he had been unable to shake off his guilt towards Sehwa until now.

As he followed Lieutenant Park out, Ki Tae-jeong was gripped by a strange feeling.

Is this how people usually think? Is this the kind of heart they have?

Sehwa’s collapse was entirely his responsibility. Lieutenant Park was just a bit unlucky. Yet he wanted to apologize to him and Sehwa, and was genuinely distressed.

If this is how ordinary people’s thoughts flow, if this is normal and right… Then should he have apologized to Sehwa first as well?

He thought that trying to explain now wouldn’t be convincing. The past is just a fragment. No matter how much you chew it over, nothing changes. So he had thought that giving a changed future would be a better path for both of them.

But watching the bewildered Lieutenant Park, it suddenly occurred to him that maybe Sehwa… might have been waiting for an apology from him too. Like other people. Normally.

“…Lieutenant Park.”

“Yes!”

“Contact Major General Oh Seon-ran. Tell him Sehwa has woken up.”

“Is… that alright?”

Although he had been trying his best to prevent the story from spreading, ironclad defense was only possible for about the first three days.

No matter how weak his domestic foundation had become, Oh Seon-ran was still a major general and a member of a prominent family. It wouldn’t have been difficult for him to arrange an informant in a 5-Star hospital, a product of money and connections.

After realizing there was a limit to hiding, he instead surrounded Sehwa’s surroundings by maximally inflating his forces. The riffraff who had been testing the waters retreated, sticking out their tongues at the sight of the latest weapons deployed in the hospital and the fighter jets on standby on the rooftop.

But surprisingly… Major General Oh Seon-ran showed no movement even after hearing the news. The suspiciously strange silence was puzzling only for a moment. Ki Tae-jeong soon realized that Major General Oh Seon-ran’s calmness was an indescribable fury.

Major General Oh Seon-ran did not attack Ki Tae-jeong with words or violence. He only sent official documents raining down as if it wasn’t worth exchanging words with him.

Notifications of the adoption process, notice and certificate of its successful completion, and even a content-certified mail stating the intention to incorporate Sehwa into the 5-Star rank based on this arrived.

Just because an illegitimate child or adopted child was registered in the family register didn’t mean their residential area automatically followed that of their parents on paper. The definition of status was the most convenient means of control, and thus had the strictest regulations. No exceptions were made even for matters involving blood ties.

Incorporating from the 4-Hwan to 1-Star was somehow possible if you greased some palms. The higher-ups were indifferent to the circumstances of the lower classes, and this wasn’t a frequent occurrence anyway.

However, it’s not easy for a resident from outside the Star ranks to enter the 5-Star rank. Oh Seon-ran knew this too, and was aggressively throwing himself at various places as if he would pour his entire remaining life into this.

In addition, certificates of asset transfer to Sehwa and thick documents explaining the associated rights kept pouring in at intervals of a few hours. And at the end of every document he flipped through, there was always a letter of parental rights renunciation enclosed.

“Now Major General Oh Seon-ran might come forward claiming his legal rights as an adoptive parent.”

“…You’re not wrong. I’m no longer Sehwa’s guardian now.”

As soon as the incubator code was registered in the hospital’s computer system, Ki Tae-jeong’s qualification as a pregnant person’s guardian was terminated. If any additional surgery is needed, the only person who can sign the surgery consent form now is the adoptive parent, Major General Oh Seon-ran.

Ki Tae-jeong absently looked at his reflection in the elevator door. The various decorations, epaulettes, and rank insignia on his uniform sparkled brilliantly under the lights.

This… is what he had wanted. He had persevered all this time to wear this star on his chest, and even when he occupied the House, he thought it was almost over.

Those who sympathized with the past were despised. Whether it was due to his harsh nature or his excellent physical abilities… he believed he had saved himself from that hell by his own power. But who was pitying whom?

If he successfully negotiated with the Kim family, he would have more Stars on his chest in the future, and after retirement, he would gain the qualification of an elder, so he could laugh at the rotten old men to his heart’s content. It was even more satisfying that the starting point of all this was due to the stupidity of Lieutenant Kim, who lived recklessly relying only on his family’s reputation.

Everything was going smoothly.

…Or so he thought.

So now that the long-awaited trial has begun, what exactly have he gained? The moment of condemning those who raised him as a killing machine is right in front of him. Yet why does he still feel like he’s trapped in a boiling pit of fire?

He can’t believe the warmth of Sehwa, which was within reach, has disappeared, and he’s floundering every day, but if this isn’t hell, where is it? 

He felt like he would drown forever in a sense of loss that seemed impossible to fill. And salvation? He had saved himself?

“Brigadier General, then how should we handle the marriage registration form?” Lieutenant Park carefully asked, meeting his eyes through the mirror.

The marriage registration could have been processed easily without Sehwa. In fact, all preparations had been completed. He had just been waiting to see Sehwa write his name with his own hand. Of course, it was said to be a voluntary signature, but as always, he would have intimidated him without blinking an eye, scared him, and eventually made him sign while crying…

“We can make it effective immediately if we submit the papers right now, but…”

However, Ki Tae-jeong kept his mouth firmly shut and gave no answer. Lieutenant Park found this behavior of his superior strange, so he didn’t bring up the topic anymore and just replied that he would contact Major General Oh Seon-ran.

“They said it was a special room… Ah, it must be over there.”

The moved hospital room was in a quiet place not far from the ICU and operating room, yet out of sight of people. He wondered why they chose such an ambiguous location after moving to a general ward, but seeing it in person, the emergency route was very efficient.

“So, this is continuing…”

As they walked towards the special room sign, Lieutenant Na’s voice began to be heard.

Ki Tae-jeong absently tapped below his collarbone with his palm. Like swallowing hot water all at once, he could clearly feel the path in his body from his esophagus to below his solar plexus.

“Ah… I’ll request additional medical staff and security personnel to be deployed at the station.”

Saying he would contact and report to Major General Oh Seon-ran as well, Lieutenant Park slowly backed away. It seemed to be his own consideration to give them time alone, as there would be many things to resolve and say. Unlike the somewhat sly Warrant officer Choi, this person was terrible at such acting, and his awkwardness made Ki Tae-jeong smirk.

Ki Tae-jeong felt the slight upturn of his lips awkwardly and touched it with his hand. How long had it been since he last smiled…

“Mr. Lee Sehwa, let me explain for now.”

Lieutenant Na’s voice became clearer. His steps, which had been momentarily paused, accelerated as if trying to make up for lost time. He tried not to act hastily, but he couldn’t bear the tingling inside.

It had been over a week since he last saw Sehwa’s face. It felt like ages since he heard his voice. He wanted to feel him alive on his skin, even if he cursed at him when he saw him, even if he cried that he hated him.

Ki Tae-jeong took a deep breath and grasped the handle.

“Just in case, you should wear it for now… Ah, Brigadier General.”

As he opened the door and entered, Lieutenant Na awkwardly saluted. In his other hand, he held a dangling oxygen mask.

And Sehwa… had only one leg hanging off the bed. It was a posture as if he might run away at any moment. Even though he had been on the brink of death, and his body was still not well… it seemed he wanted to get away from him as soon as he opened his eyes.

That clear rejection felt like a huge crack forming below his stomach. Yet because of this pain, he finally felt alive. Sehwa, who feared and felt strange about being near him, that life pulsating even with hatred for him, made Ki Tae-jeong tremble.

However,

“…Who are you?”

Ki Tae-jeong was dumbfounded by Sehwa’s question. Lieutenant Na also froze as if his breath had stopped.

“I’m sorry, but were you perhaps my visitor?”

“…”

“I don’t remember well what happened, but umm…” His eyes, which looked even larger due to his weight loss, scanned the hospital room and the IV pole. “It seems you’ve brought me to a good hospital… I’m grateful, but I don’t have the ability to stay in a place like this. And there’s nothing wrong with my body.”

Sehwa tried to lift his arm that lacked strength and also swung his leg back and forth as if to show it off.

“Mr. Lee Sehwa.”

At Lieutenant Na’s call, Sehwa made a strange expression and pressed his lips tightly. Then he mouthed his name, “Lee Sehwa,” as if trying it out. He seemed to find it curious, as if it was the first time he had been called that way.

“How old are you now, Mr. Lee Sehwa?”

“Me? I’m twenty…”

“…”

“Why are you… looking at me like that?”

Neither Ki Tae-jeong nor Lieutenant Na could say anything and just stared blankly at Sehwa. Feeling awkward under their gaze, Sehwa scratched his cheek and averted his eyes.

Twenty years old.

It was a year ago from now, and before he had met him. How much must he have hated it, how terrible must it have been for Lee Sehwa to have completely erased his memories of being twenty-one when he came to know him?

“Can you tell us what’s the last thing you remember… I mean, what comes to mind right now?”

Sensing that something was not right, a look of wariness crossed Sehwa’s face. Lieutenant Na opened his mouth as if to explain something, then shook his head.

“Brigadier General, I think we need to prepare for a detailed examination first.”

Saying he would report back later with more details, Lieutenant Na quickly left the room. Sehwa, who had been blankly staring at his retreating figure, had a small question mark on his face.

Sehwa, who had been acting as if he might run away at any moment until just now, was sitting demurely at the edge of the bed. He seemed to guess that something big had happened to him. Well, even when they first met, he felt that he wasn’t the type to be oblivious to such things.

Sehwa lifted his arms to examine both his hands, then bent down to look at his feet. Then, as if feeling uncomfortable, he clutched his stomach and frowned.

Ki Tae-jeong hesitated for a long time, biting his lip. He wanted to tell him to sit properly because it was dangerous, or rather to lie down. But he couldn’t easily open his mouth, fearing that his voice might act as a trigger, worried about what if it damaged his already confused mind.

“Um… visitor.” Sehwa, who had been sitting precariously, cautiously called out to him.

There was no emotion in that gaze. No affection, no hatred, no anger, no fear or resignation… nothing. It was the dry gaze of a stranger, as if he had never once held him in his heart.

“…Um, it seems like I’ve been in some kind of accident…”

The twenty-year-old Sehwa, the Sehwa he encountered normally without any particular trigger as he had briefly imagined before… was much more calm and composed than the Sehwa he knew. His eyes as he surveyed the unfamiliar place were calm, and he didn’t tremble as he spoke to him. He was watching him, but it was clear he wasn’t afraid.

It’s natural. He hadn’t forced him to kneel, treating him as an accomplice of Lieutenant Kim, hadn’t kicked him, hadn’t put patches on him or made him take drugs. This twenty-year-old didn’t know anything about being treated as a tool and turning his back to him, or crumbling under a love tainted with lies.

“I think I heard the doctor call you ‘Brigadier General’ earlier. Is that right?”

“…”

“Considering your clothes and all… if you’re a soldier…” As he said this, Sehwa slightly lowered his eyes. Judging by his twitching fingertips, he seemed to be gauging what rank a brigadier general might be.

“…A brigadier general is an officer in the military.” Ki Tae-jeong spoke, hiding his shaken inner feelings. 

Sehwa’s face looking up at him in surprise was identical to when he first heard this story.

“Only four ranks above me, and you reach the head of state.”

All the things he had gone through with Sehwa, his crying face and laughing as he looked at him… countless afterimages poured out as if playing back at several times the speed. His vision was filled only with Sehwa.

“A lieutenant is six ranks below me.”

But the illusion eventually shattered, and all that remained was an innocent face that found him unfamiliar.

The person sitting in front of him was Sehwa but not Sehwa. It was someone who hadn’t let Ki Tae-jeong into his world, who had forgotten everything that happened a year later.

“My name is Ki Tae-jeong, and as I said earlier, my job is a soldier, my rank is brigadier general.” This was the introduction they should have exchanged when they first met. Ki Tae-jeong offered this long-overdue greeting and carefully took a step towards Sehwa, who had erased him. “…And I’m someone who has done you a great deal of wrong.”