M 186

It was true that he wanted to place everything precious and beautiful in the world in Lee Sehwa’s hands, but sometimes, a perverse possessiveness would boil up inside him, making him want to restrain Sehwa with nothing but a single gown, just like in the old days.

Ki Tae-jeong licked his lower lip with his tongue, smacking his lips, then realized his mistake and did his best to hide his savage inner thoughts. He put on the gentle mask that Lee Sehwa adored, the one he only showed to him, and softly pulled at the corners of his mouth.

“That, that’s…”

Ki Tae-jeong ran a hand down the length of Sehwa’s back as he resisted being held. Repeating Sehwa’s name softly a few times, as if to soothe him, he felt the stiff body begin to relax slightly.

“As soon as I get back today, I was going to tell you I was sorry for avoiding you so much. I feel like I kept pushing you away without any explanation, though I didn’t mean to.”

“…….”

“I’m sorry. For upsetting you, my darling.”

“I told you that if Lieutenant General don’t want to, I didn’t need a second child either, and I’m sorry for begging… But why….”

“Yes, you did.”

Because I’m a son of a bitch, he replied playfully, and Sehwa lightly smacked his forearm. Even in this situation, Sehwa couldn’t bring himself to use any real force, as if worried he might hurt him.

Lee Sehwa probably doesn’t know. How potent that cotton ball like punch is to his heart. How this body, which remained unshaken even while enduring the tension, gravity, and acceleration of a terrifying new fighter jet, melts so easily with just one gesture from his hand.

“Like I said earlier, the fact that you genuinely want to have another child with me, in itself… yes, honestly, I was happy. Truly, I was so happy I felt like I could die.”

There was a time when he had held Sehwa, who was breaking down as his constitution changed without his knowledge and he became pregnant with a child he had never even considered, and comforted him with lies. The fact that you, that we, have come to dream of a new world makes me so happy I could die right now. But…

“I don’t want to see you in pain like that again.”

His tone was softer than before, but his opposing stance was far more resolute. Sehwa, sensing the softened atmosphere, considered begging one more time but then quietly let go of his desire. Right. It’s not about anything else, but he dislikes it so much because he’s worried about him…

“The birth control pills you usually take… how long does the effect last after taking one? What’s the dosage schedule?”

“…Hmm.”

For once, he hesitated for a moment.

“Please tell me honestly this time. I won’t get angry.”

“…For a normal person, it’s one month. The injections are every two weeks.”

This man…! Sehwa squeezed his brow, trying to suppress the anger that was surging up again. Unlike Ki Tae-jeong, he was a man who kept his promises, so he was trying not to get angry… but still…

“Ah!”

You took that kind of medicine several times a day? You got the shot every day, too! Is this man really insane? Unable to hold back, he slapped Ki Tae-jeong’s forearm, and he let out a completely flat cry of pain. It was so obvious he wasn’t hurt at all and was just playing along, which only made Sehwa more furious. I really hate you. You’re so annoying…

“Ah, wait a minute. Darling, honey, it really hurts.”

“I’m hitting you because I want you to hurt!”

And besides, it doesn’t even hurt, so what’s the big deal? Sehwa pursed his lips into a sharp pout like a bird’s beak, ready to unleash a torrent of nasty words. But the most infuriating man in the world sealed his lips with a peck, and his words caught in his throat.

“Ah, I feel a bit better now.”

Ki Tae-jeong, gazing intently at Sehwa from a distance that was just on the verge of losing focus, kissed him lightly a few more times. Even though it wasn’t a passionate kiss with tongues intertwined, Sehwa found it hard to regain his composure.

They had exchanged kisses like this a few times even when they weren’t intimate. But perhaps because the atmosphere had changed, goosebumps rose on the back of Sehwa’s neck even with these light touches that were barely worthy of being called kisses.

“I missed you.”

Except for the days he couldn’t come home due to training supervision, they had seen each other every single day, yet Ki Tae-jeong acted as if they hadn’t met in a very long time. Sehwa resolved not to give in so easily, regardless. Did he think he’d be appeased with a few kisses? He had firmly closed off his heart, but it wasn’t easy to ignore the affection dripping from his eyes.

“Me too….”

Gasping greedily for the warmth he had missed, Sehwa eventually affirmed it as well in a small voice. In the first place, he had no history of ever winning against Ki Tae-jeong in anything.

“So you drank alone and even bought adult toys? Because you thought I slept with Second Lieutenant Kwon back then and got angry?”

“…That, and also because Lieutenant General took medicine without telling me, I suddenly got so angry…”

Ki Tae-jeong chuckled in disbelief when Sehwa said he wanted to cause some trouble. All his facets made his heart flutter, but among them, it was his face as a complete man that made Sehwa’s heart race the most.

“Were you very surprised?”

When he glanced up at him, Ki Tae-jeong pressed the tip of Sehwa’s nose and asked, “What do you think?”

“By the way, darling, what else do I need to do for you to fully let go of your anger?”

“It’s okay now.”

“Really?”

“…….”

“Doesn’t seem like it.”

Ki Tae-jeong sat Sehwa on his thigh and bounced his legs a few times, as if soothing Hae-rim. Sehwa told him to stop because it was embarrassing when he made cooing sounds, but then he showered his entire face with kisses.

“Darling, from now on, let’s not let a day pass.”

“Let a day pass without what?”

“Whether it’s you feeling upset and hurt, or me not having my feelings clearly sorted out yet… whatever it is.”

“If it’s hard to explain what I’m thinking or how I’m feeling right now, let’s at least promise to say that much,” Ki Tae-jeong said, suddenly holding out his pinky finger.

“Actually, Sehwa, you don’t have to. But I will definitely tell you.”

It was the final blow, and he could no longer remain stubborn. Sehwa dropped his head as if he had no choice, then finally linked his pinky with Ki Tae-jeong’s. He playfully shook their hands up and down as if in a handshake, and instead of sealing it with a thumbprint, he playfully bit the back of Sehwa’s hand.

“…Um, Lieutenant General.”

“Hmm?”

It was around the time the weight pressing on his fingers lifted. Perhaps stimulated by his words, that it was okay to speak anything, even unrefined sentences, Sehwa unconsciously blurted out what he had tried to hide until the very end, what he hadn’t even written in his diary and only thought in his heart.

“Actually… I was imagining… naming it San-ho.”

“Hmm? Naming what?”

Sehwa looked at Ki Tae-jeong’s red lips, glistening with saliva, and reached out as if entranced. Although he was less drunk than before, it still felt unreal, so Sehwa felt reassured by just fiddling with him like this.

“If we have a second child… I was wondering what if we named the child San-ho…”

“…….”

“It seems like it would go well with Hae-rim, and it would be fine regardless of gender, and also…”

Sehwa slid his hand from his lips and stroked his prominent collarbone. After hesitating for a moment, he wrapped his arms around Ki Tae-jeong’s long neck. Even without applying much force, he collapsed onto Sehwa. At the warm sensation of his body after so long, at the familiar weight that filled him completely, tears welled up in his eyes again foolishly.

“I looked it up, and ‘호昊’ means sky.””

“…….”

“So, thinking of Lieutenant General… I decided to name it that for now. Since I arbitrarily chose Hae-rim’s name, I wanted the second child’s name to remind me of Lieutenant General…”

Sehwa had even foolishly smiled to himself, imagining that he would ask the Lieutenant General to choose the baby’s prenatal name instead, completely oblivious to his feelings.

“I just… that’s all.”