RSL Ch 96

I woke up late in the afternoon the next day. Looking to the side, I saw Han Jae-yi’s naked body sleeping quietly. He was lying face down with his hands tucked under the pillow, in a half-victory pose. A thin sheet barely covered his lower body, draping over his hips in a rather sexy way.

We had been rolling around for over 9 hours. Even subtracting time for washing up and breaks, it was a new record. Like people making up for lost time, neither of us had given up first. So we must be very tired. I could see the fatigue on his face buried in the pillow.

Usually, Han Jae-yi expends more energy than me during s3x. He constantly puts in effort to excite me and make me feel good. So he typically stops just before cl1maxing, but yesterday he came several times himself, likely using up more energy than usual.

Many couples enjoy various types of s3x, but our preference was consistent – perfect interaction and connection. That was very important to us. He responds to my expressions of pain and pleasure, and I trigger my orgasms from his moans reacting to me. If the amount of excitement we share could be measured on a scale, I think the amount we feel would always be the same.

My reverie ended. Now I had to wake Han Jae-yi, so I slowly buried my face in his shoulder. I gave him a quick kiss and called his name. He moved slightly in response to the touch and voice.

“Mmm.”

A deep, sleepy breath escaped from him. Then his back muscles twitched slightly before his upper body turned over. He lay facing up and slowly opened one eye. He gazed at me with my chin resting on his chest.

“…Is this still a dream?”

I laughed at Han Jae-yi’s sleepy words and answered.

“No.”

“Then prove it.”

“Prove what?”

“That you’re real.”

I waved my palm in front of his eyes, trying to prove I was a living person. But he shook his head, saying that’s not what he meant – prove that I was Woo Seo-jin.

It was a bit childish, but I kissed the tip of his handsome nose. Then I moved down and kissed his lips. Now with both eyes open, he suddenly slipped his t0ngue in and devoured my lips. I couldn’t help but laugh even as we kissed.

“Get up.”

I finally managed to pull away and tried to persuade him. If we stayed like this, I felt we wouldn’t leave the bed until nightfall again. Regrettably, I had to return to my hotel today. I couldn’t stay together until tonight since I had to go straight to the airport early tomorrow morning. If I spent more time with him, I didn’t think I’d have any energy left to pilot.

We prepared an early dinner. We put a tablecloth on the balcony table and brought out the 2-seater sofa. We laid out 2 blankets on top and propped up several cushions to make a cozy seat.

The chicken stew Han Jae-yi had prepared was bubbling again in the cast iron pot. The smell was incredibly appetizing and made me very hungry. I prepared bread and orange juice while he brought the stew pot over and set it on the table. A romantic dinner was laid out on the balcony of the Munich apartment as snow fell outside.

“Delicious.”

I complimented Han Jae-yi’s cooking skills. The well-seasoned chicken was very tender. The stew bowl was densely packed with vegetables and potatoes in a savory broth.

After scooping up a few more chunks with my spoon, he handed me some warm bread. I tore off pieces of the white bread and dipped them in the stew. Maybe because I was so hungry, it tasted like heaven.

“Are you cold?”

Han Jae-yi pushed the blanket towards me and slipped his hand under my bottom. He seemed to be checking the temperature of the seat, so I told him it was already warm enough. Then he started tearing up bread and putting it in my stew bowl, watching intently as I ate. He didn’t seem very interested in eating himself, constantly fidgeting with me instead.

Of course, I had always known that Han Jae-yi found great satisfaction in taking care of me. It was the same even when we were just friends, so I was very used to it. But today his gaze felt especially intense, making me want to tone things down a bit. The bread I had swallowed earlier was starting to feel stuck in my throat.

I put down my bowl and drank some juice. Then I tapped Han Jae-yi’s barely touched bowl with my finger and said,

“Why aren’t you eating? It’s getting cold.”

As if he had been waiting for me to put down my bowl, he wrapped both arms around me in a tight embrace. It was so tight I could barely breathe.

“Don’t press on my stomach.”

Han Jae-yi chuckled at my words. Then he deliberately rubbed my abdomen even more. It wasn’t like my abs would disappear from just chicken stew, but I found myself tensing my stomach muscles unconsciously, feeling like I was being examined.

He nuzzled my back and said,

“Do you really have to go back to Korea?”

I couldn’t help but feel my smile turn a bit sad at his honest sentiment. It seemed he was also troubled by our parting. Though we had passionately professed undying love yesterday, reality is reality. To avoid repeating the same mistakes, we both needed to be wise now.

The sun was about to set. I could see the neighboring houses covered in snow. They all had white roofs the same size, and it looked like Lego toys on display. Beside me as I looked down at them was warm stew and a cozy blanket. Though the air was cold, I felt a warm fuzziness inside. Our dinner was slowly coming to an end, with frequent pauses in between.

We put the food aside and leaned back on the sofa, our bodies overlapping. I rested my back against Han Jae-yi’s chest, gazing at the sunset horizon. He wrapped me tightly in a blanket and buried his lips in the nape of my neck.

“First, there’s something I want to discuss,” I spoke up. Han Jae-yi just listened without any particular reaction.

“I can terminate my contract and return to Germany. The notice period is about 4 weeks. At the earliest, it would take about a month. If you want, I’ll do it right away.”

I wanted to let him know this regardless of what conclusion we reached. Since I had given him an unreasonable misunderstanding last time, I needed to set the facts straight now. I was prepared to give up everything for him at any time, and I didn’t mind losing those things. Realistically it wouldn’t be easy, but if we decided to be together, I wanted to make the effort this time.

However, Han Jae-yi seemed to think differently.

“Don’t do that. If you quit right now, it’ll be hard to fulfill your flight hours and you might end up having to go to an LCC, right? If that happens, I’ll feel guilty this time. I know what kind of regret you felt toward me in Korea.”

I gently placed my hand over his arm that was wrapped around me. Everything he said was true, but for that, we would have to give up our romance.

“But you’ll miss me, how will you endure it?” 

Those were the words I told myself. Even when we were in a one-sided long-distance relationship, I struggled every day missing him. Now that we’re back together, how could we live apart? I wondered if I could really bear it.

I tilted my head back, fully leaning on his shoulder. I could see Han Jae-yi’s face, slightly looking outside, deep in thought. As if realizing I was staring intently at him, he lowered his gaze.

“How about waiting until there’s an opening at LH and then coming? You could get the same treatment.”

He suggested I move back to the company I was with before coming to Korea.

“Hmm, we don’t know when a position will open up. Captain-level positions don’t become vacant often, so we might have to wait more than half a year.”

Even half a year would be quick. It could take a year.

“Yeah. But let’s wait anyway. Instead, whenever you have a flight nearby, come to my house. Keep eating with me, sleeping with me. If it’s close, I can move too. If we can see each other even briefly, let’s meet no matter what. Time will pass that way.”

Han Jae-yi spoke maturely, but his heart seemed to feel differently. He closed his eyes quietly and brought my hand to his cheek. Feeling his skin cooled by the chilly air, I gently rubbed his eye area with my fingers. He kissed my fingertips several times as I wiped away his invisible tears.

We know. The wait will be long and time will drag. We’ll probably resent the mornings that come after short nights together. Yet we believe we can do it because we’ve never completely let go of each other.

He caught me when I tried to run away from reality, and I caught him when he feared the future. That certainty, engraved during our difficult times, showed us that we were ultimately everything to each other. So we should be able to manage well.

“Now when we meet, we won’t even have time to fight,” I teased, laughing at our past mistakes.

“Fighting is nothing, we’ll barely have time to sleep,” he said, lowering his face to kiss me gently. My hand was still on his cheek, so I ran it through his hair as I received his t0ngue more deeply. I traced his soft mouth and devoured his smooth lips. The kiss we exchanged in the cold wind quickly heated up. If we kept going, it felt like we might catch fire again.

“I have to go now,” I finally managed to pull away and tell him. The fleeting look of disappointment on Han Jae-yi’s face mirrored my own heart. Yet it looked so cute that I couldn’t help but kiss his nose and cheeks several more times. Han Jae-yi endured my barrage of kisses with a mix of a frown and a smile.

“Are you done?” 

When my prolonged kiss finally stopped, this time he bent down and pounced on me. He peppered bird kisses all over my face and neck, causing ticklish sensations to rise. With my arms tightly bound by him, resistance was futile. My involuntary laughter mixed with screams startled the birds perched on the neighboring roof, causing them to flutter away.

“Okay, okay. I surrender, stop it.”

“Kiss me as a sign of surrender.”

Before I could answer, his lips devoured mine again. The blanket fell off the sofa. At this rate, it seemed like I might never return to Korea. I wished for heavy snow at Munich airport. I finally managed to pry Han Jae-yi off and pointed at the table.

“Let’s clean up together.”

“It’s okay. I’ll do it, you go get ready.”

He pushed my back, ushering me into the house. For a moment, I felt both guilt and a brief joy. Humans, regardless of age, all enjoy making messes. People who find joy in cleaning are very rare, so if someone offers to clean up for you, it means they really like you. Usually, it’s parents and lovers who do this.

I changed clothes and prepared to leave. Then I realized I had completely forgotten something. I had brought lots of Christmas presents for him but hadn’t had time to give them.

While Han Jae-yi was still cleaning up the table on the balcony, I snuck into his study. I pushed aside the scattered documents on his desk and placed the presents on top. I also wrote a short note. Feeling like Santa Claus, I rubbed my palms together and came out to the living room.

“Yes, mom. Go ahead.”

I paused for a moment at the sound of his voice coming from the balcony. Han Jae-yi was on the phone. Guessing who it was, I leaned against the wall and watched him intently.

“I know. Yeah, I’ll go on the weekend. It’s okay. Don’t cry, mom.”

He paused cleaning the table and stood still with his hand on his hip, taking the call. He would occasionally let out a small sigh, run his hand through his hair, or gaze towards the horizon. Though his responses were brief, his voice was infinitely gentle. I could sense him filling the void left by his departed father.

“No, Seo-jin is here. Yeah… I think it will be like that. Thank you. See you on the weekend.”

The conversation was fragmented, like the one he had with his father a few months ago. But I no longer tried to forcefully piece it together. My position in that conversation was no longer important. I was already a part of his life.

Han Jae-yi stood there for a long time after ending the call. I couldn’t read his expression from behind, but it seemed he was composing himself before letting me see the emotions his mother had stirred up. Outside, the sunset was beautifully fading. Perhaps that’s why he looked like someone momentarily detached from reality beyond the balcony door.

Just moments ago, he had been happy, laughing and kissing me. And now, alone, he was facing the sorrow that had quietly crept in. His time, mixed with the joy of love and the pain of loss, resembled the late afternoon in snow-covered Munich. I was gazing at him as if appreciating a masterpiece. Then suddenly, I thought, why not say it today?

There are such moments in life. It may be a very ordinary and insignificant day, but when I look back, it becomes a turning point where your life splits in two. The morning I first met Han Jae-yi 15 years ago, I was just riding my bike and playing around. So I didn’t want to pick a day in particular.

The balcony door opened and he walked into reality. When our eyes met, he smiled as if nothing had happened. And he went into the kitchen with the cold dishes. I followed him in without saying a word and saw his back as he leaned against the wall and cleaned up the dishes.

Han Jae-yi glanced back at me. Seeing that I had nothing to say, he gathered the leftover food. He neatly placed the plates in the dishwasher. He threw away the food waste and tied up the garbage bag. His hands must have gotten dirty, as he turned on the tap to wash them. As I watched him intently, I asked,

“Was that your mother on the phone?”

“Yeah. She calls often these days. I’m planning to visit on the weekend.”

He answered my question casually.

“Is she sick or something?”

“It’s not that, she’s probably just lonely being alone. It’s understandable, losing someone you’ve lived with for 40 years.”

He said, shaking the water off his hands and turning towards me. I agreed. She must be experiencing the pain of loss that we had only imagined yesterday.

“But why?”

Han Jae-yi gave me a puzzled look as he dried his hands on a towel.

“What?”

“You’ve been standing there like you have something to say. Didn’t you say you were running late? Are you all ready?”

He put detergent in the dishwasher and pressed the button. The whirring sound of the machine seemed unusually loud. A very ordinary, unremarkable daily life was flowing. That’s why I liked it even more.

I called his name.

“Jae-yi.”

“Yeah?”

He answered casually while putting the bowl of leftover chicken stew in the refrigerator.

“Will you marry me?”