DI Ch 172

When did I ever give any indication that I liked his chest? I was angry, but I didn’t stop or pull my hands away. How could touching a man’s chest make me feel good? Anyone saying that clearly hadn’t touched Tae Seong-je’s chest. Despite having liked a man for the first time and now having a boyfriend who is a man, I had been uncertain. But now, I realized I really did like men. It was humbling how much I liked it, to the point where all the tension left my body while other parts hardened even more.

At one point, Tae Seong-je, who was sitting at an angle, led me to climb on his abdomen. I sat on his body and played with his chest to my heart’s content. Honestly, if he had just told me to touch it, I would have pulled back, but his forcing my hand to touch his chest gave me some confidence.

I slowly extended my other hand, brushing against his well-defined muscles and pressing firmly on his chest with my fingertips. As I marveled at his remarkable firmness, Tae Seong-je’s free hand wasn’t idle. His left hand traced a large circle on my right thigh, gently caressing it.

I took a deep breath, feeling both awkward and excited. The atmosphere was getting intense, and I couldn’t bring myself to leave. Then, Tae Seong-je’s hand touched my groin again.

“Ah…”

He groped my p3nis through my pants. Carefully touch and stimulate my p3nis as if examining its size and shape. It appears that these were not empty words. I didn’t even take it off, but my underwear was already wet. It was tantalizing. He could be a bit rougher.

“Ah!”

When he started rubbing it from the roots as if measuring the length, I really wanted to take off my pants and underwear. I was holding back the urge to beg for him to touch me properly. As I tried to suppress this urge, Tae Seong-je grabbed my chin and forced his fingers between my lips, making me open my mouth.

“I’m not going to undress you or force you to look. So don’t be scared.”

“Yes, I… okay.”

I belatedly realized that I was clenching my teeth so hard that my jaw hurt, and I opened my mouth awkwardly, feeling a little disappointed. I exhaled heavily and relaxed my grip on his chest. Damn. My handprint was on his chest. I stared at the mark and swallowed the saliva pooling in my mouth. The excitement I felt for the first time was overwhelmingly unfamiliar, but it wasn’t unpleasant. I almost voiced my regret but swallowed it back down.

“You can just take it off.”

Did I just say something crazy? What was I talking about? I bit my tongue to stop myself from saying anything more. It was his thumb I ended up biting, though. I forgot his hand was in my mouth. I tugged on his arm in embarrassment. Tae Seong-je’s fingers, moistened with saliva, had clear tooth marks. I was about to apologize and ask if it hurt, but I swallowed it.

Now I know from looking at him that you can feel the heat in people’s eyes. It was lust. Tae Seong-je said cute things like he liked me, but he desired me. All of me. It was a feeling that was very far from being cute.

“Ah…!”

At the same time that he straightened his upper body, his hand came into my underwear. I felt momentarily happy. Only then did I admit that I wanted to be touched by him. I wanted Tae Seong-je to touch me all over.

Ah, it feels so good, it’s driving me crazy. I buried my head on his shoulder and let out a rough breath. All the strength left my body except in my arched back. Despite his scarred, calloused hands and the lack of lotion, the way he moved them was so gentle that it felt even better. As he stimulated me, the sound of the friction grew louder.

It must be unpleasant to touch someone else’s semen with bare hands. I have to endure it. Ah, I can’t stand it. What does your hair look like? When he stimulated my urethra, I shuddered, thinking I might really lose it. My head tilted back so much that I almost fell.

Wait, did I just ejaculate? I wasn’t sure. I panted, trying to refocus my blurred vision. Suddenly, my waist was yanked forward. To steady myself, I grabbed his chest. My entire body tingles from head to toe, leaving me powerless. Suddenly, I felt a huge presence twitching under my buttocks.

He was getting aroused while rubbing mine.

I was distracted by his excitement and bowed my head, I stared blankly at him as I made strange noises. The faster he moved, the louder the squelching sound became. It was also the evidence of how much I had come. The thought that Tae Seong-je’s hand was completely soaked with my semen made me incredibly excited.

“You’ll get hurt if you keep that up.”

His calm voice carried an unmistakable sensuality. I just nodded blankly.

“Seo Seung-won.”

“…”

“If you’re going to do that, you might as well bite me.”

He pressed my cheeks and forced me to open my mouth, then led me to bite his shoulder. Even though I thought I shouldn’t do it, I set my teeth on Tae Seong-je’s skin. Biting someone because I didn’t want to make a sound…

“…!”

Unable to resist the provocative gesture, I pushed off the bed with my heel. The blankets were crumpled and pushed aside, but I couldn’t care less. There was a fishy taste in my mouth. It was blood. It was his blood, but the metallic taste was strangely familiar. Yet, it excited me even more. Tae Seong-je must be a demon. Everything about him was truly tempting.

I didn’t know how many times I cvm in his arms. I remembered it up to three times. I only kept track because he suddenly stopped me from cvmming. If not for that, I wouldn’t have been able to count. I was too exhausted to even feel any post-orgasmic clarity. I needed to wash up, but I was so drained that it was troublesome. What time was it? I hoped it wasn’t morning yet.

As I lay there listlessly, Tae Seong-je pulled at my waist.

“What is it…?”

“Look at this.”

I couldn’t believe he was asking me to look at my own crotch. I had to admit, it was quite a sight. My underwear was drenched in semen. It was so thick and sticky that it seemed perverted. Was this really my doing? I felt more amazed than embarrassed.

“I feel like I’ve ejacvlated enough s3men for a lifetime.”

I said it casually, then realized how vulgar it sounded and covered my mouth with my arm. Embarrassing.

“You can still cum more.”

“No, I can’t.”

“You can.”

“No, really, I can’t. Have you tried it?”

“Yeah. You came even more.”

“…”

Tae Seong-je chuckled and leaned in. He kissed me naturally, so smoothly that I didn’t have time to be shocked. But then he seemed to realize what he had done, looking a bit surprised. I stared at him, then tilted my head slightly.

Even though I was aroused and dazed, I wasn’t so far gone that I couldn’t think rationally.  So I just hope he knows that it wasn’t that impulsive of me to kiss him back first. He paused for a moment, but that was all.

We closed our eyes and kissed deeply, as if we were tasting each other’s lips. This was my first kiss. I felt like electricity was flowing through me. It was that thrilling. I feel better as my hot, slightly dry lips become increasingly moist. Honestly, I wasn’t sure what to do, so I just followed his lead, biting and sucking his lips. The sounds were explicit and embarrassing, but I wanted to keep going.

I imitated Tae Seong-je and carefully caressed his shoulders and the nape of his neck. I wanted to keep kissing him a little longer. His arms, wrapped around me, were trembling. His slow kisses were quite intense. I could feel the deep restraint in him as he sucked my lips intensely, as if holding back his desire to be rough. He wasn’t even using his tongue, showing great self-control. I didn’t mind if he didn’t hold back that much.

The excitement of my first kiss made my heart feel like it would burst. I could feel Tae Seong-je’s heartbeat beating under my palms. It was thrilling to know that he was as excited as I was. Cute. It was so cute when a man older than me tried his best to resist going crazy over me. I felt like laughing but didn’t want to ruin the moment.

“… Love me.”

He spoke earnestly as our lips slightly parted. I was momentarily speechless. I didn’t realize how different ‘I like you’ and ‘I love you’ could feel. The weight of the words was entirely different. If he had asked me to like him, I could have answered easily. I already liked him.

But love…

I didn’t think I could love someone as much as I did at seventeen. I vaguely have that feeling. Even though he resembled that person in many ways, it didn’t mean I could love him the same way. Forgetting about that person entirely wasn’t an option. This was something I couldn’t simply move past.

The feelings I had from the beginning were different, and I shared more memories with that person. The bittersweet and poignant memories were deeply embedded in me, becoming scars. Could I love Tae Seong-je in a similar way? It was a complex and difficult question. I wasn’t afraid of love anymore. I could love Tae Seong-je. I would eventually love him. But could my love grow enough to satisfy him?

In the end, all I could say was that I would try to love him. I could say that because I liked him. I hoped he understood that. But how much did I love him? Were we both satisfied? Seeing his bitter smile with a devastated expression, I suddenly became curious.