DI Ch 136

As I looked around to see where Sand was, Woo Ji-min mumbled something as if he found something cute.

[It seemed like he came up with his girlfriend on the first train in the morning.]

“Ah.”

It must be Gu Min-joo then. Looking at the fact that they came together, I guess I made a mistake. Yeah, it seemed like he was up to something too. The strange feeling I felt only yesterday subsided immediately. It was close to the feeling of losing one’s self-esteem. I tried not to worry about it because I was afraid it would only lead to further disappointment, but somehow, I was deeply affected.

[Anyway.]

He sighed deeply again. Ah, was it a sigh or was he smoking?

[I’ve let them in for now. Hurry up. We pretended to live together, but they’ll catch on soon.]

“Yes. I’ll go now.”

After hanging up the phone, I roughly changed my clothes while touching my sore forehead. Suddenly, I felt a presence and looked down. I don’t know if it was my fur or my eyes were really swollen, but I saw sand that didn’t look like anything. At the same time, its tail was wagging energetically, which made me laugh while I was hastily getting dressed.

“Do you want to go together? Huh? Do you want to go out with Hyung? …Ah.”

As I reached out to scratch the small chin, I realized I was suddenly scared. My hands were shaking like I had a tremor.

It wasn’t like I was meeting any enemies; I was just meeting the kids. There was no reason to be scared, especially when all I wanted was reassurance, not explanations. Gripping one wrist tightly until my hand left marks, I realized the tremor had stopped.

The moment the trembling stopped and I was about to leave, Tae Seong-je came to mind. In the midst of the chaos, I opened a notebook and hastily scribbled a brief message. Of course, I tore it up immediately. The phone wasn’t just for decoration. I could just send a text. Stuffing the crumpled paper into my coat pocket, I glanced around before stepping out.

“Where are you going?”

Min Jeong-oh immediately came out and asked. It was a rare sight to see him startled. It was too early to go to school, and since I came out with the dog, he must be wondering what was going on. I patted Sand and exerted pressure on my lower abdomen to steady my voice and prevent it from trembling as I spoke.

“Do you remember my studio apartment? Please take me there.”

I’m just thankful that he left without saying a word, despite the sudden request. I soothed my unease by patting the furry animal that was pressing heavily on my thigh.  I had some plans in mind, but everything fell apart before I could even start.

“Hey, do you happen to know where Hyung went?”

“…He’s at home.”

“…”

…But I just came out of the house? I hesitated for a moment, then remembered the basement. He must be downstairs. I didn’t think of that.

I brushed my disheveled hair aimlessly and took out my cell phone. Let’s contact him before I forget. How ridiculous and surprising it would be for him to come up and find no one, neither me nor the dog? As I turned on the screen, Sand playfully licked the screen.

“What do you think this is, sticking your snout out like that.”

You have a bad habit. I hoped it hadn’t licked it with the intention of eating it. Maybe I shouldn’t have brought Sand. But it’s so obedient and well-behaved. This much should be okay, right?

My carefree thoughts disappeared when I saw Woo Ji-min waiting for me outside. I really didn’t think about it. What was the point of bringing him if he hates dogs?

“I’m a little late. You can go somewhere to rest, or at least eat breakfast!”

I think Min Jeong-oh just said something, but I couldn’t hear it properly because I was in a hurry. Well, my mind was so focused on Woo Ji-min and my body was so busy packing Sand, so I probably would have missed it even if I tried listening again.

Ah, it’s a bit chilly in the morning, but it bothers me to see him dressed so lightly. Did he come out because he felt uncomfortable around the kid? Feeling apologetic, I hurriedly rushed up to him.

“I’m sorry. I’ll go to a cafe with the kids first. Ah, is there anywhere open at this hour? Anyway, I’ll go somewhere so you can rest.”

“No, I’m fine. Don’t worry about it. …But your hair, no. Whose dog is that?”

“That’s right. Sunbae, no, hyung.”

With a smile on my face, I instinctively lifted up Sand to show it to him.

“It’s Sand.”

“No, I didn’t ask for its name.”

“It’s cute, right?”

As I kissed Sand on the forehead and leaned closer to him, Woo Ji-min, who was flustered, widened his eyes and nodded hesitantly.

“Uh, uhh. Cute. … Is this the dog you raised?”

“Yes.”

“…Hmm.”

I don’t know what caused it, but Woo Ji-min burst into quiet chuckles. Indeed, looking at Sand’s innocent face was enough to make anyone laugh. I put Sand on the ground and squatted down to tell him to look closely, and he folded his knees to sit across from me. Seeing his sparkling eyes, he didn’t seem to dislike dogs, which was a relief.

“I knew Hyung likes cats, but I didn’t know you also like dogs.”

“I like all animals. I prefer cats the most… but I also like dogs a lot.”

He whispered quietly while showing the back of his hand to the tip of Sand’s nose. It was a gesture that showed consideration. Seeing that, I unconsciously stared at him. If it had been March, or at least if I had not met Tae Seong-je, I would have recorded this moment as information.

“The stomach… it’s huge.”

“The paws are cute too.”

“Yeah. Oh, it’s a male.”

This. I remembered that I was so caught up in the cuteness that I didn’t even check the gender. After reflecting, I decided to study the breed characteristics and everything about dogs. …But first, I should focus on preparing for the final exams.

“Should I take him with me?”

Sand? Alone? Why? Because it’s cute? When I looked at him blankly, Woo Ji-min smiled softly and tilted his head. For a moment I was captivated by the hair falling over his forehead, but he suddenly stood up.

“You go and talk to the kids. I think they came up suddenly because they had something to say, but in the meantime, I’m going to take a walk around the neighborhood with him, I mean, with Sand. But did he eat anything?”

“It’s not time for breakfast yet. If he seems hungry, give him this. It’s a snack, so don’t give him too much.”

“Okay.”

“…Hyung.”

I stood up with him, hesitatingly murmuring.

“I’m really sorry.”

“…It’s nothing.”

His softly smiling face was gentle. Ah, as expected. This person was too vulnerable to affection. This was not kindness, but weakness. I was your only friend. It didn’t matter how deep or distant it was to you. The important thing was whether I harbored strange feelings or not.

Unlike him, who blushed from the cold, I blushed from embarrassment. When everything was over and he got his happy ending, should I have been honest with him, or should I have continued to deceive him with white lies until the end?

Then everyone came to mind. Literally everyone. Everyone who thought I was crazy but didn’t say a word and remained silent.

… Ironically, Woo Ji-min’s reddened face from the cold looked much livelier than usual. Suddenly, I saw a pile of cigarette butts in the alley. Although there was only a wall without windows over there, perhaps he had been outside smoking all this time. It wouldn’t be surprising if he catches a cold tonight.

Trying to force myself to think of something else amidst the heavy heart, I only felt more guilty. Feeling like he was getting colder, I took off my coat and wrapped it around his shoulders.

“The morning air is cold.”

I spoke as if making an excuse as Woo Ji-min let his gentle smile fade and hardened his expression. But it’s true. Fall mornings tend to be brisk, making it unexpectedly easy to catch a cold.

“… No.”

But he immediately shook his head and refused.

“No. It’s not cold. You don’t have to give it to me.”

With each word he uttered, his tone seemed to grow more stiff. Stunned by his strong refusal, I stopped abruptly and watched as he clapped his hands red with cold until his fingertips. Then he threw the coat back to me and took Sand’s leash from my hand.

“I’ll be back, so you go inside quickly. It’s cold.”

I lowered my gaze from watching Woo Ji-min walk backward before swiftly turning away, and Sand’s tail swinging as she followed him. The coat thrown into my arms was a bit crumpled. I smoothed it out and slung it over my forearm. …Could it be that I did something wrong? It felt somewhat unnatural just now. I was confused if it was just my imagination.

After standing there for a bit, I turned and went inside the building. Woo Ji-min has always been an important person to me, but he’s not the one I should focus on right now. I climbed the stairs slowly. Everything felt like slow motion, and time seemed to pass even slower.

Standing in front of the door, I hesitated briefly before entering the familiar number on the keypad and slowly opening the door. Through the cracked opening, I saw Seung-joon sitting hunched over. Then, perhaps hearing the sound of the door, he suddenly lifted his head. The meeting of our eyes was as awkward as the strange silence.

“… Hi.”

“…”

There was a time when he welcomed me so warmly, but now he was so depressed that he couldn’t even respond. It’s painfully awkward. I missed the timing to take off my shoes, so I was just standing there awkwardly when suddenly tears started welling up in his eyes. I felt like my hair was standing on end and I just wanted to turn around and get out of here.

“Hyung. Uh, I’m sorry hyung…”

This guy seemed to cry whenever he saw me. After messing with my bangs for no reason, I pulled out a tissue from the tissue box in front of me and approached Seo Seung-joon. Only then did I notice Gu Min-joo sitting quietly next to Seo Seung-joon, who had been hidden by the wall until now.