DI Ch 23

From handwritten problem books to math notebooks, doodle notepads strewn across the floor, candy canes, and countless A4 sheets spread out on the desk with writing utensils scattered about. They say a person’s house can reveal a lot about them, so am I a messy person?

I hurriedly finished cleaning and went to the bathroom.  I was afraid of the unknown, but I couldn’t run away because the battle was right in front of me. As per the theory, I relaxed my body with warm water and sat down with a towel spread on the bed, wearing only my coat. I hated being hurt and hated seeing blood even more.

“Ugh.”

Worried that my nails would scratch me, I placed a condom on my finger and tried to insert it, but it didn’t go in at all. I was informed to rub it gently, insert it, and widen it…

“Gel… That’s right. Gel.”

I took out the gel I had bought earlier, wet my hand until it overflowed, and tried to insert it again. It was easier than before, but I gritted my teeth when a finger went in. Ah. Damn, that feels awful. Do I have to do this? I couldn’t bring myself to put another one in or to go deep enough. It felt foreign and repulsive, but something thicker than this would be in soon, and I couldn’t give up here if I want to avoid seeing blood.

Even though the room wasn’t hot, sweat beaded on my forehead. My body temperature seemed to be running wild because I felt the pain. I was dizzy and fell face down on the bed, but I kept pushing. I forced myself to endure the unprecedented pain by rubbing my eyes on my forearm.

Fortunately, one middle finger was inserted, and no more than two were inserted. I fiddled with it until my hands were sore, but the cramped hole barely opened. Perhaps it’s because I was scared. It’s a bad habit. I don’t have the courage, so I just assume it won’t work…

As usual, I tried to force myself to think positively, but it hurt so much.   Just a little bit. A little more… I had been concentrating for a while when I was startled by the ringtone and noticed that it was already past 11:00. I quickly answered the phone while hiding the condom wrap and gel under the bed.

“W-wait, wait a minute, I’m going down now.”

Even when I heard it, my voice seemed to be tinged with nervousness. I quickly grabbed my shorts and dashed downstairs. I’m not sure why I run like this. I was embarrassed because I felt like I had been caught doing something wrong, so I acted panicky and my heart skipped a beat.

Tae Seong-je was always well-dressed as he was seen through the common entrance. I’d only seen him twice, but he looked like a third-generation conglomerate, completely different from before and entirely in keeping with his lineage. The day was a little warmer, but it would be a little cold at this time, but Tae Seong-je was wearing only a black shirt and a coat draped over his forearm.

Whether it was stuffy or hot, he unbuttoned one of the buttons. Even the unbuttoning finger was sexy. It was the most unrealistic scene I’d ever seen, so it was difficult for me to come to my senses. The erratic breathing gradually subsided, and the legs that had been walking quickly slowed down. I wasn’t drinking, but my heart was racing.

Why is my heart racing and my gaze was drawn to his muscled thighs? I swallowed my saliva and raised my gaze to meet Tae Seong-je’s. Tenacious and insistent eyes that never averted their gaze. My heart raced and my limbs stiffened with tension as I thought of doing it soon with this man. Wah. I’m really crazy. Why am I like this?

“What, you are blushing as soon as you see me. Do you like me that much?”

Tae Seong-je, who never missed an opportunity to tease people, approached with a bright smile and tilted his head. He wasn’t exactly a bright man, so I couldn’t figure out why he looked bright enough to make this night sparkle. I wouldn’t have acted like a stupid person who ate honey like this if it weren’t for the dimples.

“Or are you horny? It’s okay, it’s not weird to be horny for me, everybody does it.”

A shameless personality. A vulgar speech. Excessive confidence emanates from that expression with a relaxed smile. Tae Seong-je was a man who could not be described as a decent person even in simple terms. Still, I couldn’t hate him. Even if he was a person who moved freely and was even mischievous, and you never knew where he’d land, it’s difficult to hate someone who knows he’s good and is proud of himself.

Tae Seong-je grabbed my chin and lifted it slightly before lowering his head and kissing me lightly. I stiffened, closed my eyes, and remained motionless until he parted. His expression as he pulled away looked amused.

“I almost forgot your face when I hadn’t seen you in two weeks. You haven’t forgotten me, have you?”

Can the former and the latter come together?

His arrogance made me cringe. My fluttering heart suddenly calmed down. Still, seeing Tae Seong-je’s sly smile, I seemed to be getting used to him. I didn’t feel sad or embarrassed when he asked if I had forgotten him. Thanks to that, I came to my senses and responded quite calmly.

“Yes. I haven’t forgotten you.”

It was the first time I’d ever had to deal with something like that, so I felt encouraged. I smiled to myself, pleased with myself for standing up to Tae Seong-je like this. Tae Seong-je then looked down at me, pinched my cheeks, and shook them.

“I’m busy as hell, but I can’t let go of you. You don’t look like that, but you’re so cute when you text and talk.”

“Ah. It hurt.”

I think he lightly pinched it, but why does it hurt so much? He was so strong because he had a strong stomach. I patted Tae Seong-je on the forearm to tell him to stop teasing me.  I felt strange after bringing him into the house. He was acting like a landlord in my house, which even Seo Seung-won’s parents had never invaded at will.

I’d never thought the house was small, but his smell, combined with the faint scents of cigarettes, cologne, and breezes, made the room feel full. He went into the restroom to wash his hands. It was nice to see that he shared my habit of washing hands immediately after going outside. It’s trivial, but I discovered something in common, so I got a good feeling for no reason, and I wondered what the hell I was doing.

Tae Seong-je found a box of red ginseng and herbal medicine that I hadn’t put away while I was setting up the table.

“Do you like collecting things like this? But you didn’t even open it.”

“It’s just what my father send…”

Oh, don’t talk about family. Even though it was unnatural, I quickly shut up as soon as I realized my mistake. It will go even in the middle if I don’t talk too much. Perhaps it was just my mood, but I felt awkward and uneasy in my stomach. I listened intently to the clinking of the bottles, but my chin was caught and my head turned.

“Your eyes are red. Did you cry? Why.”

“That…”

Because it hurt more than I thought to put my fingers in there? I clamped my mouth shut, not daring to say so.

“Why. What is it.”

“Just a little. It feels itchy.”

“You rubbed your eyes so hard to the point it hurt. Look at the redness. Doesn’t it hurt?”

“Uh, I think it’s okay…”

“Come here. Let me see.”

I don’t know why it keeps getting hotter. Maybe it’s because he speaks to me as affectionately as he would to a lover. Or maybe it was due to his affectionate eyes. Tae Seong-je’s muscular forearms encircled my waist and lifted me up. I almost screamed out of surprise at that moment for a split second. He’s really strong.

His large hand descended and rubbed between my spine and buttocks after stroking my back and waist. I was so shocked that I couldn’t breathe properly for a moment. It was because he took my right hand in his empty hand and placed it on his groin, or more precisely, on his left thigh. My heart skipped a beat as I realized I was about to touch his penis, even through his clothes.

I felt a physiological reluctance to touch someone else’s penis other than mine, but what surprised me was its heavy presence. It’s not even hard yet. It indicates that he did not have an erection. Does that make sense? I could clearly feel how thick it was, feeling the hot feeling in my tightly held palms.

My mouth opened wide in astonishment and admiration. Is this the size a person can have? Aa expected Tae Seong-je was not a human being. As Tae Seong-je kneaded my hand, I could blatantly feel the length of the increasingly hard pillar under my palm held in his hand.

“Uh, hyung. But we’re supposed to… drink.”

I can never do it soberly. When I turned around and said let’s drink with a face that would have been so pale that I didn’t even have to see it, Tae Seong-je looked as if he had heard something really naive.

“If you want to drink, you drink. I’m not going to drink.”

Why don’t you drink? Do you have a bad liver? Tae Seong-je smiled meaningfully, probably noticing my bewilderment.

“I guess you haven’t realized this yet.”

“What…”

Tae Seong-je smiled with his eyes narrowed as I trailed off the rest of my words and looked up. Then, for no apparent reason, he tapped me on the cheek as I stood there dazed.

“You don’t know what you’re talking about because you’ve only just started drinking… Baby, when you drink too much, your dick doesn’t get hard.”

My face gradually reddened and my lips pursed as I stared at him blankly, and he chuckled. Tae Seong-je’s eyes twinkled with mischief, and my head spun dizzily. What was that, and does that really happen when you drinks?