DI Ch 29

I looked up at the sky and lowered my gaze slightly. Tae Seong-je was looking out the window with his chin resting on his palm. When I saw his calm face, I felt like I was going to pass out from resentment. It’s only difficult for me, only for me… He’d already showered and dressed neatly. He was dressed in a shirt and pants. A cigarette dangled from his lips. It wasn’t lit, but the Zippo lighter was rolling around in Tae Seong-je’s hand.

“Seong-je hyung…”

Whose voice was it. He turned around. Oh, it’s mine. My voice was so hoarse that even I myself couldn’t recognize it. I muttered helplessly.

“You can’t smoke here…”

“Ah.”

It looked like he was trying to smoke unconsciously. Tae Seong-je took out the cigarette he had chewed up and snapped it with his fingers. The unfinished cigarette went into the trash can. Tae Seong-je put the Zippo lighter in his pocket and said it was not a big deal.

“Sorry. It’s nicotine addiction.”

“…”

“I’m trying to quit, but it’s not easy. It’s annoying.”

What? Addicted? Everything is annoying. I couldn’t relate to him, so I just nodded. Tae Seong-je suddenly reached out and opened a mineral water bottle on the table. I gulped it down as he brought it up to my lips. The moist water that entered my dry mouth tasted sweet.

“How about down there. Does it hurt?”

“Yeah…”

“Really?”

Tae Seong-je smiled and replied. That was it. What. That was it? I don’t know why he even asked in the first place. He won’t even comfort me anymore… His kind attitude had disappeared without a trace. We did it once, so it’s over. For some reason, I felt depressed and my eyelids felt heavy. I didn’t have enough strength to react, so I just let it go.

“Hyung, you know.”

Ah, my throat hurts. I cleared my throat once and blinked slowly before talking to him.

“I’m sorry that I keep saying it hurts.”

“…”

He tilted his head. For some reason, his expression was a little strange. I wanted to figure out what it meant, but reading the expression of someone with a good poker face was difficult for me. Tae Seong-je didn’t reassure me or say it was okay. He just looked at me with a thoughtful expression. I stared blankly at his handsome face before opening my mouth again with difficulty.

“Seong-je hyung.”

“Why again?”

“We’re dating, right?”

“What?”

Tae Seong-je asked in disbelief. I hid my sullen face and spoke again, a little shamelessly.

“We’re dating from today, right?”

“Ha.”

I had asked such an absurd question that even if he had burst out laughing, I wouldn’t have been embarrassed. No, the reason I said that was because, no matter how much I thought about it, I couldn’t figure out how to handle our relationship with each other in Part 1. Shall we become lovers now and endure until Part 2? Well, how could we do that?

Rather than that, wouldn’t it be the best way to let Tae Seong-je know that Seo Seung-won has feelings for him? That way, when they meet in Part 2, it will be easier for them to become lovers. Then, when Tae Seong-je tries to seduce me, who he has no interest in, I wouldn’t have to go through the hardships of pretending to be in love with acting that didn’t work, so it was killing two birds with one stone. In other words, there was no change in future development.

Perfect. I closed my eyes in satisfaction. He’s a busy person, so he’ll be gone soon. Let’s wash up right away and get some sleep. My back, bones, and muscles were all achy, but sleeping in the bed was uncomfortable. I’ll sleep on the floor with a new quilt, and when I wake up, I’ll buy a new mattress. Then, when I get to school, I’ll hang out with Woo Ji-min and irritate Kang Moo-hyun.

Everything seemed to be going well, so everything that had been so frightening and difficult suddenly felt normal. I’m a little embarrassed because it was my first time with a guy, but it’s not like the world was going to end. So maybe I shouldn’t be so strange about it. I guessed his response as I fell asleep.

‘If I sleep with someone once, I will never sleep with them again.’

‘Don’t bother me. Does it make sense to date someone just because you slept with them?’

“Do you want to play dating with someone like me?”

My sleepy eyes widened. What. I didn’t expect this kind of response, so I just blinked my eyelids. Tae Seong-je acted nonchalantly, but he had a mysterious expression on his face. I couldn’t guess what that meant, so I just looked at him dumbfoundedly. I thought he’d just be annoyed by the childish thing I said…

“It’s easy for you to say that because you thought you knew who I was just because you slept with me once. Do you know me? It didn’t happen that way, so why are you so naive?”

Me? Naive? Well, I did intend to make you think that in some ways. But why do you care about me?

“No…”

“No what.”

Tae Seong-je clicked his tongue and flicked the tip of my nose lightly. What. Why am I being scolded? I felt unfair and want to retort, but I couldn’t think of anything to say. As I pursed my lips, Tae Seong-je looked at me with very pitiful eyes and shook his head.

“A relationship should be with a normal and healthy guy.”

“But Seong-je hyung, you’re perfectly fine…”

“Ugh. Look at you talking nonsense about not wanting to lose a single word of this.”

“But…”

“Don’t talk back.”

“…”

I closed my swollen lips tightly. My head was complicated because I couldn’t understand Tae Seong-je’s intentions. But silence cannot be the answer. I opened my mouth again.

“But… I only have hyung now.”

It wasn’t a careless remark, but they were sincere. No, it was pure sincerity. If I lied, I would be found out immediately, so I had to keep silent or tell the truth. Anyway, it was true that there was only him.

Everything was perfect, from Woo Ji-min and Kang Moo-hyun to the plot development. So far, there have been no problems. The only problem was Tae Seong-je. He was the unknown factor, which neither Woo Ji-min nor I were aware of. I just needed to stop worrying about him and handle him properly, and the story would flow smoothly, and the way home would be easy.

I second-guessed his answer again. I had skimmed the book, but this time I was sure.

‘You’re naive. Don’t put meaning to one-night stand.’

“What, damn it. Just forget it.”

“Okay, let’s do that.”

“Yes… I’m sorry, what? What?”

“Let’s date.”

Tae Seong-je spoke again when I asked in surprise. There was a hint of amusement in his voice as if there was nothing more enjoyable than this. I’d never been more afraid of someone’s smile, and it made me feel like I couldn’t sleep.

Tae Seong-je was smiling from ear to ear, and my head was spinning.  No way, this fickle man. Did he accept it just because he thought it would be fun? Even if I didn’t look in the mirror, I felt my face had turned pale.

“However. I have a condition.”

“…What is it?”

“It’s not difficult.”

He shrugged and said indifferently.

“I just don’t like being betrayed by someone close to me. Especially if it’s my own person… it makes me feel dirty and disgusted.”

Tae Seong-je looked down at me and waved his little finger.

“Because Seung-won is now my person.”

I followed his gaze to his twitching fingers. Tae Seong-je slowly withdraws his hand and smiles kindly. Despite the fact that it was April, the cold wind made me shiver. It was so cold that it felt like winter had arrived rather than spring.

“If you ever get caught doing something behind my back.”

Tae Seong-je muttered quietly. His eyes flashed for a split second. It felt like I was in the back alley where he was mercilessly beating people. Tae Seong-je, who had stopped talking as if to choose his words, suddenly smiled and continued as I tried to hide my trembling body and only blinked my eyes.

“I think I’m going to be a little angry.”

“…Hyung. What if. …What if I do something else?”

I asked even though I knew that ‘if’ was the most useless word. Upon hearing my words, Tae Seong-je looked at me as if he was surprised, and then patted my shoulder as if he was having fun.

“You are more curious than I thought, Seung-won. Well? If you want to know, try it.”

His gentle expression and soft voice… They didn’t match his ruthless expression or tone. I remained silent and said nothing else. Tae Seong-je smiled at me as if he was satisfied and gently stroked my head as if telling me not to be scared.

“… I won’t.”

“Okay. Don’t. I don’t expect much from you. Just keep that in mind. Then I will make you happy.”

I breathed out and barely nodded. Then Tae Seong-je finally smiled happily and ruffled my hair.

“There are a lot of annoying people around me. Just stay still so they don’t have to pay much attention to you. It’s tiring.”

“Ah… Yes. I’ll be good.”

Tae Seong-je raised one eyebrow when I finally spoke. I wasn’t sure if that meant he liked it or not, so I became frustrated. It was fortunate that I had read the book and had learned a little about Tae Seong-je; otherwise, I would have had a mishap.

Everyone has weaknesses. In the case of Tae Seong-je, it was the betrayal of his people. Many people were said to be dissatisfied with the young Tae Seong-je, who had caught the boss’s eye at a young age. They were concerned that he would steal their food bowl and eventually replace them, so they secretly recruited or scouted his people to keep him from gathering his own people.