DI Ch 173
by SpringlilaJust as the atmosphere was about to become more awkward, Tae Seong-je spoke in a very affectionate voice.
“It’s late. Shall we wash up and go to bed now?”
For a moment, I was flustered and could only nod silently. I felt self-conscious and my throat was dry. While it was good for me that we could move on as if nothing had happened, I doubted it was the same for him.
Even though I didn’t want to deliberately change the shifted mood, I kept feeling concerned. My chest area was tingling, so I stole glances at his face. His complexion wasn’t bad. In fact, he was smiling, and the mood seemed to have softened. The charming dimples on his face were also genuine.
Still, how could someone have such perfect features without a single flaw? They say overly good-looking people lack humanity, but I guess that’s not always true. There are people in this world who are this handsome and still have humanity. It was especially apparent when making eye contact. Looking into those eyes, I could see how much he…
Suddenly, Tae Seong-je smiled with his eyes. Startled, my body stiffened. But why- oh. Belatedly coming to my senses, I hurriedly removed my palm. Damn, my hand had betrayed my will and was on his ear. I must really be out of my mind. I was supposed to observe his expression, not to stare and touch him.
“Is there something on my ear?”
“No, I was just curious how many there were.”
I started to make an excuse out of embarrassment but stopped. What does that have to do with touching? I inwardly scolded myself and cleared my throat unnecessarily. I don’t understand why even the marks from his piercings look so good that they make me lose my senses.
“Did you take them all out on purpose?”
I was about to add ‘piercings’ but stopped when I felt a strange sense of déjà vu. I paused, wondering if I was recalling something, but nothing came to mind, which was a bit unsettling. Maybe it was just my imagination.
“Yeah. The kid in my home tend to copy things. I was worried they might imitate this too.”
Tae Seong-je said while cupping my cheek. Suddenly feeling tense, my neck stiffened. His thumb, with a slightly rough texture, pressed and stroked my cheek enough to make it move. After fiddling with it a few times, he quickly removed his hand. I unconsciously followed it with my eyes, when he suddenly turned his head. As soon as I noticed the teeth marks on his exposed shoulder, my cheeks started to burn again. I was thinking, “I’m not a dog, why did I bite a person?” when he tapped his ear and continued speaking.
“It doesn’t look good.”
Huh. That’s not true.
“The marks are pretty…”
There are people who are strict with themselves but not with others. He seemed to be that type, with quite rigorous standards. What exactly doesn’t look good?
At that moment, Tae Seong-je’s jaw muscles tensed tightly. It was just for an instant. It was really just a moment, but as if that was the beginning, suddenly everything in front of me seemed to move slowly. From him clenching his fist to raising his arm, it all approached me very slowly. It was strange.
It was at that time that my warm body quickly became cold and I instinctively tried to back away. Tae Seong-je paused when he looked at his hand, and then spoke with a restrained smile.
“If the kid’s ears… are all tattered from an early age, it wouldn’t look good, right?”
“Ah. Oh, right. Yes.”
My face flushed for a different reason now, and I lowered my head deeply. I had made a disrespectful misunderstanding. Even though it seemed out of character, his attitude had been sincere and his actions full of consideration. How could I have such a misunderstanding about such a kind person?
‘I thought he was going to hit me.’
I felt ashamed. And feeling ashamed made me strangely resentful. Despite knowing that he liked me a lot, at that moment, I thought he was going to hit me. That’s what I was really ashamed of. Although I grew up being hit countless times by my father, even that ended when I entered high school. Shouldn’t childhood habits end too?
Where does this resentful feeling come from? As I stared at the crumpled bed sheet, he gently brushed aside my fallen hair and forehead. Following that touch, no, drawn by his low laughter, I instinctively raised my head.
“…!”
Right in front of me, I saw a viscous liquid sliding from Tae Seong-je’s fingertips. I stared blankly at the suggestive gesture of him rubbing his thumb and index finger, then caught my breath. My cooled body suddenly became hot from head to toe. Damn. In a complex sense, I couldn’t look at him directly and dropped my gaze again.
“Maybe it’s because you like me too much. They’re copying all sorts of things.”
“I, um…”
“I’m not sure what your standards are, but I guess there’s something I find quite alright in my own way.”
I couldn’t bring myself to interrupt, so I waited leisurely for him to finish speaking. As he gave me a look as if to say ‘now you can speak’, I awkwardly opened my mouth while glancing at him.
“Hyung…, your hand”
“What about my hand?”
“…I think you need to wash it.”
He just smiled slyly, as if he found my discomfort amusing. I hadn’t realized it before, but it seemed he had a rather bad side to his personality. I cleared my throat to calm my heated insides, and then his strong arm suddenly wrapped around my waist, pulling me close.
The hand that had wandered in surprise reached out to him. I gave up trying to tell him to stop. Anyway, I didn’t have the strength to walk on my own two feet, feeling drained. I buried my head on his shoulder where the bite mark was and closed my eyes. Meanwhile, he sat me down somewhere. It was the sink.
I looked at the sink, then at the bathroom door, and finally stared blankly at Tae Seong-je. He had said we should wash up.
“Didn’t you say to wash my hands first?”
“…”
I didn’t say anything, but he gave me an answer. And it was the right answer, which left me speechless. As he started washing his hands, I changed my posture to feel a little less uncomfortable. My mind was filled with thoughts of wanting to take off my sticky underwear and wash up quickly. But my heart was also unsettled by another discomfort. I shouldn’t be sitting here. It’s a bit awkward to ask him to let me down now.
“Feeling very uncomfortable?”
“Just… a bit.”
When I responded hesitantly, Tae Seong-je said with a calm expression while putting a toothbrush in his mouth:
“What’s the big deal? It’s your own cum.”
“…”
“I’m kidding. I’m done now. Hold on.”
I intensely glared at him as he removed the toothbrush and finished washing his hands. He seemed to be not just playful but genuinely had a mean streak in his personality. Maybe that’s his true nature. Even if he pretended otherwise, these aspects kept popping out, suggesting it might be true.
“Why? Do you have something to say?”
One might think it odd for such a gentle person to act like this, but I found it rather surprising. In other words… even if he actually has a bad temper, it means he’s suppressing it. It was a bit unexpected, as if he was trying to show only his pretty side.
“No.”
“No? Then why are you looking at me like that?”
“…I’m not doing anything. Just looking.”
My chest had been itching unpleasantly for a while, making it hard to control my expression. Sometimes, he would let things slide subtly as if nothing had happened. Yet at other times, he would be overly persistent on odd matters. I leaned back against the wall, and he lightly tapped my cheek with his fingertip.
I didn’t know if it meant not to lie or not to run away, but my heart suddenly felt numb and I couldn’t stay calm. When I rubbed my wet cheek with my forearm, it was so hot I thought I’d been burned.
Even the nape of my neck seemed bright red without me looking, so I held my head still to avoid looking in the mirror by mistake. I felt like I was going to make a groaning noise if I continued like this, so I finally opened my lips.But unable to speak honestly, I changed the subject.
“It reminded me of when I was young.”
“When you were young? When? Last year? You still remember?”
“When I say young, I don’t mean last year. Anyway, I got scolded for sitting on the sink. My father saw me and said it was ill-mannered… Ah, no. I wasn’t sitting, I was standing.”
I didn’t even reach the top, I was just standing there. Although I don’t remember clearly because it happened when I was young, I remember my father scolding me severely. I thought about my father, whose face I couldn’t even remember, and searched for memories. I don’t think he scolded me out of concern. He probably didn’t even notice that height was dangerous for a child, or that there were things like razors or lotions up there. If I had been in my mother’s place doing that, he might have just told me to come down. That’s the kind of person my father was.
But somehow, his expression had hardened. Seeing his face change suddenly, I opened my eyes wide in concern, wondering if he was feeling unwell.
“What’s wrong?”
“… Did you get hit? On the head?”
“Yeah. That’s right. How did you know?”
I asked a question and found the answer right away. I was unconsciously groping the back of my head. Feeling embarrassed and awkward, I quickly lowered my hand.
“I guess I have bad luck with the back of my head.”
It didn’t make any sense, but I checked my palm. Naturally, there was no blood on it. On the contrary, Tae Seong-je, who had been wetting his hands, touched his forehead once with his wet hand and then brushed back his bangs. I was curious about the slightly annoyed look in his eyes, forehead, and between his brows that were clearly visible, when he pointed out:
“That’s not something to be hit for.”
“That’s true, but I was ill-mannered.”
This isn’t even a chair. When I spoke while tapping the sink with my fingertip, he took out a towel in a somewhat rough manner and denied it.
This isn’t a chair. I tapped the sink with my fingertip as I spoke, and he took out a towel with a slightly rough attitude and disagreed.
“There’s nothing a child does that deserves being hit. You can just talk to them, why hit a child?”
“Oh…”
His stern words felt so different that my heart raced. If he hadn’t gotten angry, I might have even clapped.
“Why are you so amazed by something so obvious?”
He’s right. As he said, there’s nothing a child does that deserves being hit. Not knowing that, I once believed my father’s words without a doubt. That I needed to be hit to come to my senses. …But that’s that and…
“Are you getting annoyed at me right now?”