MWMM Chapter 103: Jealous of His Own Self

When Shen Ci walked into the hospital room carrying a thermal food box from Sister Song, he immediately noticed that Yan Yuzhou’s gaze had been following him closely.

It surprised him—pleasantly. After all, this omega had been cold and distant with him for months now. Only when he was in unbearable pain would he softly call his name. But even then, Shen Ci knew… Yan Yuzhou wasn’t really calling him, but the version of him he used to love.

Shen Ci opened the box. Inside was nourishing soup, rice, and a few small side dishes—fragrant and comforting. He picked up a piece of pickled vegetable with his chopsticks, placed it on the rice, and sat down at the bedside. With a soft smile, he brought the food to Yan Yuzhou’s lips.

Even though Yan Yuzhou had already given birth, Shen Ci still insisted on feeding him personally.

But unlike before, Yan Yuzhou didn’t comply so readily.

“Shen Ci,” he said, his tone faintly strained. “I don’t have much of an appetite. Can I eat later?”

Shen Ci nodded. Yan Yuzhou had never had a strong appetite, and forcing him to eat while he choked it down in discomfort only made Shen Ci feel worse. So he gently replied, “Okay,” and began packing the dishes away.

That’s when Yan Yuzhou finally spoke up.

“Why do you never go see the baby?”

Shen Ci’s hands paused. A flicker of something flashed through his eyes before quickly returning to calm. He answered simply,
“I’m not interested.”

Yan Yuzhou’s face went pale.

He’d always assumed Shen Ci didn’t love him… but he never imagined Shen Ci wouldn’t love the baby either.

“You don’t like him?” His voice trembled. “I risked my life to bring him into this world—and you don’t love him?”

Suddenly, Shen Ci leaned in.

Just as those words of accusation fell from Yan Yuzhou’s lips, Shen Ci gently but firmly cupped his face in both hands.

Their eyes met. And in that moment, Yan Yuzhou saw it—waves of emotion churning in Shen Ci’s eyes, turbulent and deep.

“It’s not that I don’t love him.”
“It’s that I don’t know how to face him.”
“To be honest… I deeply regret letting you get pregnant.”

Shen Ci’s voice was hoarse—tinged with remorse and guilt.
“If not for him, you wouldn’t have had to suffer all this pain.”

Yan Yuzhou’s heart suddenly twisted as if something had clutched it tight.

That sentence hit him like a lightning bolt. His eyes reddened as he asked, his voice quivering:

“What… do you mean by that? Say it clearly.”

Shen Ci’s expression suddenly turned solemn, his gaze intense and radiant as if burning with a thousand suns. Cupping Yan Yuzhou’s face in his hands, his voice was steady and filled with conviction.

“Zhouzhou, when the doctor told me you were having a difficult labor and hemorrhaging… I wished, more than anything, that the one in danger was me instead.”

That single sentence sent fireworks exploding in Yan Yuzhou’s mind.

If he hadn’t misunderstood… did that mean—Shen Ci truly cared about him?

“I thought you only loved the baby…” he whispered pitifully. Another letdown and he wouldn’t be able to take it. He would rather have never hoped at all.

“Who told you that?” Shen Ci’s voice was firm and full of objection. He held Yan Yuzhou’s face a little more tightly—carefully, reverently—his gaze brimming with emotion.

“I love the baby, yes. But I care about you even more. The child will grow up and live his own life. But you—you are the one I’ll love for the rest of my life.”

The moment those words fell, Yan Yuzhou cried.

He hadn’t shed a single tear in months. Even during labor, when he had been writhing in pain, he had only bitten his lip hard and endured it all in silence.

But now, he let go.

Shen Ci knew—when an omega is willing to show their vulnerability to their alpha, it means they truly recognize and trust them.

That realization left Shen Ci both shocked and elated.

“Zhouzhou, it’s okay now. Don’t cry.” He pulled him gently into his arms, heart aching with guilt.
“It’s my fault… I made my wife cry.”

Hearing that, Yan Yuzhou broke down completely. He let everything out, sobbing freely as he pounded on Shen Ci’s chest and arms with his fists—half angry, half clinging.

“It’s all your fault, everything’s your fault! If it weren’t for you, I wouldn’t have had to give birth to a baby. Wuwuwu… And you bullied me, and forgot me completely without even asking! You ignored me, hated me, stayed away from me! You wouldn’t even touch me in bed! I’m going to report you to the police and have them throw you in jail for a hundred years! Wuwuwu…”

Shen Ci endured every blow, listened to every childish accusation, and found it utterly adorable.

“Zhouzhou,” he said with a grin, “if you lock me up, you won’t have a husband anymore. Could you really bear that?”

Yan Yuzhou paused, his tears drying up abruptly. He pulled away from Shen Ci’s embrace, his gaze suddenly sharp—scrutinizing, searching.

After a long moment, he murmured,
“He used to say the same thing too.”

Then, quietly, he reached for a few tissues from the bedside table and began wiping away his tears on his own.

No more crying.

Shen Ci felt a pang in his chest.

Just now, Yan Yuzhou had referred to the old Shen Ci as “he.”

That single word made one thing painfully clear—in Yan Yuzhou’s heart, the person standing before him now and the man from the past were two entirely different people. The place that Shen Ci used to hold in his heart… was not something this post-amnesia version of himself could compare to.

That realization suffocated him.

Despite the memory loss, Shen Ci couldn’t deny the overwhelming pull he felt toward this omega—wanting to hug him, kiss him, bite him, even sleep with him. It was a craving etched deep into his very soul, impossible to resist.

He was sure: the old Shen Ci must have loved Yan Yuzhou madly.

And Yan Yuzhou, all along, had only loved that version of Shen Ci—not the one here now, who was practically drowning in jealousy over his former self.

A sharp edge settled over Shen Ci’s expression.

His heart hardening, he grabbed Yan Yuzhou by the chin and forced him to look directly into his eyes. He leaned in, flashing a cruel smile.

“Listen carefully. Your man has always been me—from the beginning to the end. From now on, you’re not allowed to keep anyone else in your heart.”

And with that, ignoring the surprise in the omega’s eyes, Shen Ci crushed their lips together in a searing, possessive French kiss—forceful and breathless.

The moment their lips met, his soul surged with the same thought again:
This omega’s taste—damn it, it’s unbearably sweet.

Yan Yuzhou began to resist slightly, clearly disagreeing with the statement he’d just made. But that only made Shen Ci, already consumed by jealousy, even more unhinged.

He pinned the omega in place, crushing any attempt to resist, any spark of refusal—snuffing it out before it could ignite.

It wasn’t until much later—when his lips brushed against a tear on Yan Yuzhou’s cheek, cool and silent—that Shen Ci snapped back to reality.

He instantly let go.

Then, without a second thought, slapped himself hard across the face.

He would never compare to his former self.
At the very least, the man he used to be… wouldn’t have forced Yan Yuzhou to do anything against his will.

If Yan Yuzhou still clung to memories of the old Shen Ci, then he—this Shen Ci—had no right to be jealous.

“I’m sorry, Zhouzhou… I lost control just now.” Shen Ci smiled bitterly, defeated. He stood from the bed and automatically stepped back, putting distance between them.

Glancing at the table, he saw the food had gone cold. He picked up the bowl and chopsticks again, brought them over, and with a hoarse voice, said quietly,
“The food’s gone cold… Come on, let’s eat.”

Yan Yuzhou leaned weakly against the pillows, lips slightly swollen from the kiss. But rather than showing disgust or resistance, he reached out and lightly tugged the fabric of Shen Ci’s shirt.

In a soft voice, he said,
“Come closer.”

Shen Ci obeyed—and leaned in.

Yan Yuzhou gently pulled Shen Ci back down to sit on the edge of the hospital bed. Then he reached up and lightly stroked the cheek Shen Ci had just slapped himself on. His fingers brushed over the red mark, his voice soft and full of concern.

“Does it hurt?”

Shen Ci didn’t reply. He only shook his head.

Then Yan Yuzhou suddenly smiled.

It was a warm, gentle smile, like a breeze in spring—soft and comforting, slipping effortlessly into the cracks of Shen Ci’s worn-down heart.

“Shen Ci,” he said quietly, “you used to feed me like this too.”