TEB Ch 86

Renard, who didn’t care if his clothes got wet or not, reached out his arms under Liev’s shoulder and supported him. It’s not something to make a big deal about. At the moment when his face became hot because he was without clothes on, Renard’s gaze turned somewhere. Where are you looking?…..Liev lowered his head in the direction of Renard’s gaze and felt like fainting in his place.

“…Ah.” 

Liev, who realized the situation, froze like stone, and Renard cleared his throat, turned his head, and averted his eyes. 

“… It seems like you’re alright. Finish washing up and come out.” 

The awkward tone made Liev want to bang his head against the wall and die. It was normal for your body to react involuntarily when you were tired and suddenly relaxed. Because an erection doesn’t necessarily occur during s*xual arousal. It wasn’t even that hard, and it could have been easily ignored, but unfortunately, it happened at a bad time. 

…I want to die.

Leaving aside the fact that my face was so red it felt like it might burst, I was so embarrassed that my heart felt like it would explode. I should have just washed my body and left quickly. But I ended up sitting there with my butt exposed. Even though I regretted it, it was already too late. Not only did I show my embarrassing side, but Renard’s reaction that followed was shocking.

When they were living in Renard’s mansion, didn’t he get excited and jump on his sleeping body? If something like this had happened in Renard’s mansion a while ago, it would not have ended with just a moment of help. But Renard had his neck and ears turn red, coughed a few times, and then left the bathroom. 

“…….” 

Even though Renard said he wouldn’t do the first move again, it’s funny it bothered him, but it still bothers me. Are you no longer interested in me like that? It’s not like he suddenly developed self-control over the course of a few days.

Renard’s bold declaration of ”This time, I’ll make you want me first.” What he had declared had long since disappeared from his mind, buried in the many incidents that had just occurred. But seeing as he tries to hug me like I’m his wife every time we sleep, it doesn’t seem like anything has changed. Liev, who had been staring blankly at the tightly closed bathroom door, sat down in the bathtub again. 

There was one way to get rid of all the worries at once. It was the method that had been lingering in his mind for a while now. But how could he do something like that? Liev let out a few silent screams and buried his head under his knees.

He couldn’t do it, he had never done it before, and he didn’t have the confidence to do it. If he failed, he might just jump out the window or drown himself in the dishwasher. Because there was no other way. Renard won’t be at a disadvantage if he doesn’t tell me, so in the end, I have no choice but to lose.

Because I like you more.

Renard seemed to always insist that he liked him more, but it was an absurd claim. Why do you think I went through that trouble in the first place? Let’s start by thinking about how I ended up in such an awkward position as the Dragon Knight. The superficial reason is that it was more difficult to refuse due to pressure from the royal family, but the deeper reason is that he was worried about Renard.

The reason he had been pushing Renard away since they met again was because he thought it would be better for him, and he was confident that he cared for Renard more than himself. 

So, the last resort was to grab Renard’s leash and shake it. 

“…….” 

Are you really doing it? Are you sane? Liev ignored the voice that kept ringing in his head and got out of the bathtub, carefully stepping on the floor. There was nowhere left to retreat. Liev’s heart continued to pound loudly as he let out a long sigh. He wiped himself dry and changed into a clean dressing gown he had brought for pajamas.

Be quiet, I feel like I’m going to die of embarrassment. Afterwards, he took a deep breath and tried to calm his breathing again, but it didn’t help. 

“…….” 

When Liev came out of the bathroom with a slightly calmer expression, Renard got up from his lying position as if he had been waiting. 

“You’re not hurt anywhere, are you? Are you okay?” 

Although he had briefly checked earlier, he asked with a tone that still sounded worried. Liev sat down at the end of the bed, preparing his heart for something he had never tried before. 

“Oh, I just lost my footing for a moment, so you don’t have to worry. It does not seem like it’s sprained anything.” 

Even though it was just an ordinary conversation with nothing special, his mind was filled with sinister intentions, making his heart pound like a person who had committed a crime. Calm down, please. Renard did worse things to me than this. Liev murmured to himself, trying to convince himself. But that was then, and this is now. The feeling of being a victim and a perpetrator wouldn’t be the same this time. 

I can’t do this. When Liev lowered his head to hide his blushing cheeks, Renard suddenly sat up on the bed like a playful puppy, looking at Liev and blinking in his eyes. 

“I think your face is still red. Are you feeling feverish?” 

He reached out his hand towards Liev’s forehead, and Liev’s heart began to tighten again at that calm gaze. The fact that he even thought of doing this was proof that he had already been swayed by Renard a long time ago, but he felt it all over again. 

He realized it once again. I really like this guy a lot. I’m already so attached to him that I can’t even control my own actions. It might be too late to realize this now, but when Renard started to distance himself, Liev could clearly see it. 

Renard was different from the other creatures he had taken care of as temporary guardian. Of course, his mindset towards him might have been much different from the others, but fearing the day when they have to part ways felt like the end of the world, and it was the first time he suffered from such long aftereffects after breaking up.

It wasn’t just because Renard could walk, talk, and make decisions for himself, unlike other animals. Maybe it was because Liev felt like he was going back to his childhood, with a small head and a body as small as a child’s, and spending his youth with someone else for the first time. 

During his childhood, Suhyuk was always alone, and there was no one to take care of him properly, as well as no one to give his heart to. He always had to hide and live like a burden at home. Life in the institute was not much different, but he was able to endure it because of the lovable presence that he would nuzzle into his arms. 

His precious dragon, who was the only thing in this world. When he met Renard again and he acted as if Liev were everything to him, Suhyuk knew that he couldn’t go any further, but he couldn’t help feeling a strange sense of satisfaction that he had crossed an irreversible line. 

“I don’t want to be everything to you,” he said to himself. But at the same time, “I want to be the most important person to you.” 

Liev was getting closer due to his selfish desires. Now that Renard had achieved the growth he wanted first, it was time for him to be honest with himself.

“I don’t have a fever.” 

Liev carefully pushed Renard’s hand down and crawled on his knees towards him. Looking down from above, Renard was wearing a loose robe and exposing his bare chest. He had denied it all along, but now he had to admit it. He himself wanted Renard in this way too. 

“What’s going on all of a sudden?” 

As Liev’s shadow fell over his face, Renard narrowed his eyes in surprise as he looked at Liev. He seemed to have no idea why he was doing this. Liev felt embarrassed, and his knees were already trembling as he stood on Renard’s thigh and knelt on them. Then he uttered the sentence he had rehearsed at least ten times in his head. 

“….Are you really not going to tell me anything?” 

He himself couldn’t understand what he was saying. Liev swallowed his dry saliva.